Why, yes, a book about meself!
(AKA Journal of Rufus)
Aye, 'tis me, Rufus Sharkchum. I reckon ya came here for th' writing, so brace yourself. I c'n start off wit a history.
Ah rem'ber when me english was harf decent an' livin' with my folks, when I was a lad. Lucky, I was, to have a education an' a good bed to sleep in. Facts was, I even had a fine,young lady friend -- which may've been infortunate as well. Why, back then, it was custo-marry to give 'er a a gift or two to keep the bond a-glowin'! But I was a poor lad. Could'n afford to even have a lady friend!
Me father was a fishinchap an' me mother was always a-gamblin' at th' pub! So whatta did was sneak the mosta me mother's gamble coins to buy a fancy jewels fer me gurl. Then th' gurly made off wit me collar an' me heart.
What was a lad to do when his own mother coulda found out? So, I hitched a ride as th' cabin crew on the good old ship, The Obsidian! One of the most active ships around and it prob'ly still is, mate! Worked myself from cabin boy, to roughin'the crew, ah did!
That be it for my history-- or at least all that I mindin' to tell you! It be a fair dose of it! Why, I oughta outdo the fiddler's stories if I wer'nt such a bad at playin' the fiddle, meself! Of course, don't be tellin' the crew this, or off th' plank I go! They c'n be very protective over persons alike th' jolly f'low! 'Specially the she-mates... wish I had that typa luck wit th' ladies!
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