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 Posted: Sat Feb 24, 2007 10:01 pm
Alright, sorry, I know you guys are probably sick of me using this board as an excuse to vent like it was some sort of blog, but I really could use some "outside" feedback on this topic now. It's been eating at me half of this week.
Case 1)
Wednesday night, after our Ash Wednesday service, when we came home I was gonna go to bed but for some reason I decided to stay up and read over Rich's shoulder when he was at Penny Arcade. If you could spare two minutes to read Gabe's comments entitlted Here We Go Again and A Rare Opportunity (both are about halfway down each page), I would appreciate it.
D'ja read 'em? About what the kid was like IRL? And at 15... Can a kid really be called something like "broken"? As in, not working right?
Case 2 - common place)
I used to eat lunch with a lady who had one son who was currently locked up in jeuvie and a daughter who was pulling the same "It's getting done my way or I'm reporting you for abuse!" attitude. And this kid had more serious problems than that, I was just appauled that this poor lady I worked with would come into work frustrated as anything because the school called and her husband called, and the girl's friggin' 14 and can't take care of herself for an hour between when she gets home from school and when her mom gets home from work because she gets into trouble with SOMETHING - ANYTHING.
Then there's my aunt's husband's kid. She's 16 or 17, now, I forget. Typical child of a divorced family that didn't care much for her. Mom goes to work all the time and leaves her with the grandparents, daddy just buys her whatever or deals with her in a passive kinda way. I never thought there was a thing wrong with her except that on account of she was brought up to be a spoiled kid, she'd have social problems in school. Well, apparently they got worse. She's into all kinds of trouble now. =_=; She was taken away from her mom for pulling some stunt concerning the internet, and then my aunt flat out refused to let her back into their household anymore because she was so uncontrollable, so she HAD to go back to the mother, who of course pushes her off on the grandparents and the cycle starts all over again...
And then there's this kid I came across in a Gaia Slots chat room last evening who got into a venting session about how he's all heartbroken and family-torn and crycrycry he doesn't have any further reason to live. And he's 14. And as the progression went, turns out he was into "risque" (accented E) things back at age 9! NINE!
case 3)
This book I'm reading is throwing me for a loop. The first thing that happens is there's this group of authority figures who have to sentence this teenaged kid to death because he's been consumed by his use of Black Magic. And they kill him. Right there. Sword through the neck. And the main character vommits and can't cope. He keeps going on about, "But he was just a kid!" And the authority's argue back that he stopped being a kid several murders ago. Well, main chara can't argue that one too much, the kid was totally off his rocker... But he feels a horrible remorse and almost responsability that no one found this kid and stopped him before it got this bad. One of his friends points out that it'd be difficult to find and correct every kid, since the city's full of 'em and you'd kinda have to take personal responsability for whichever one you wanted saved. Could get difficult.
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Where was I going with this?
I've got two baby (pre-teen) brothers and two young teen girls who I like to think I hold a degree of responsability for. Here comes my civil duty - imprint upon these kids the morality of maturity so they don't grow up to be crazy psycho killers. But not even that far. How do I imprint on them what they should not do because it'll only hurt them in the end? Isn't it the basic teenaged desire to push the limits and break free of the bounds placed by parents? To prove we can make our own choices be they good or bad? How in the world... how in the world do I make these kids understand that there are some important things that simply have to be observed for their own safety and well being? The chat room kid said he'd almost "done it" at age 9 during truth or dare. My youngest brother just turned 10... And much to my nausea, he's played truth or dare behind his mother's back. He assures me it was nothing nasty like that, but... I know the kinda kids he hangs out with and I DON'T want him getting into a situation like the chat room kid. How in the HELL am I supposed to explain to him just how important it is to resist peer pressure on some of this s**t? Is it even my job? Are the parents even aware of what the kids are capable of?! >< And my girls! Oi, I worry 'cause I know the one's mom and she does tend to underestimate her daughter's social installation from time to time... I don't want any of the four of them to come home one day with an STD or a kid... They're all so young and stuff... But at age 10, should they even be GETTING talks like this? And from a girl who's supposed to be the big sis? What about age 11 with a learning disability? What about ages 14, 15, 16 with slow learning? They're all aware that stuff is out there. But will their parents object if I discuss it with their kids? Is it my place at all? >< Damnit, I'm so tense about this.
And then there's the whole, Can kids be broken? thing... I like to believe no one's beyond forgiveness. I like to think that one day Hittler might come to judgement in the afte-life and be truly sorry and be forgiven. I like to think that my other uncle's step kid will be forgiven for breaking into cars and houses and stealing stuff. That the kid mentioned on Penny Arcade will one day be sorry and be forgiven for everything. But I'm never personally affected by them. I can say, oh, it was time for a kid-debugging because I wasn't involved. But ... what if it was my brothers, or my girls? What if it was YOU GUYS' loved ones who were victimized? If someone pulled a gun on my girls, or my brothers, ... I don't know if I could forgive them. If that kid that honestly doesn't care about anything was someone I knew... Could I forgive him? Is he worth forgiving? Does he simply know not what he does? Or is he broken? A weed in the grainfield to be burned as rubbish at the end... Can someone really be a "broken" and non-fixable person? If one of my kiddoes grew up and broke, I think a part of me would be crushed. Surely those parents and other people involved with these kids who kill are feeling those things too, right? Mad and unwilling to forgive the bad, but crushed and wanting to fix the part that used to be good? Can these kids not be salvaged?
Rich's cousin is in jail for being the only one of four teens in a drunk driving accident to have survived. He was driving and the other three in the car were killed. He's in prison. I knew this guy. Not well, but well enough. Well enough to call him family. I'm upset he's there, but... when he comes back out, will he do it again? Was it a mistake being fixed, or the straw what broke the camels back? I'd like to think jail is a little more impending than saying "You're grounded for a month!"
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I kinda lost where I was going with needing a reaction. I guess I just wanted to know you guys are alive and breathing and can relate. Even if peeps are broken... is it a sin to want them to be fixed?
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Posted: Mon Feb 26, 2007 10:46 pm
Anthro7 Even if peeps are broken... is it a sin to want them to be fixed?
In regard to the articles, I agree with Gabe in that its not the video games' fault, nor the parents'. The problems stem from something much less superficial than the most simple scapegoats, and you'd have to be...unbalanced to begin with to do something to that degree of violence and depravity. People have been using video games as an excuse for this kind of behavior for a long time, as well as controversial music, movies, comic books -- even novels! Its always the same story, just a different medium to blame.
Ultimately, I have to say that yes, people can be 'Broken,' and the blame never falls to the most obvious reasons; there are darker avenues to be explored, but people are too afraid to search them for the proper answers.
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scrambledeggsandtoast Crew
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