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 Posted: Mon Jan 22, 2007 8:51 pm
Ah, another self portrait (me when I was little). This was the first assignment for the year and I really liked how it turned out. @@ ... Thought I would post. Sorry for the kinna bad quality, I had to use a digital camera, it's too big to scan.
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Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 5:13 am
the lines on the hand are too heavy and boxish. They are indeed proportionate, and probably how it looks in real life, but it doesn't fool the eye into reading 'hand.'
The figure is cropped in an uneasy spot and it's just floating there on the page. Give it something [depth?] to ground the figure.
Othere than that I think this is a nice drawing... but a bad photo.
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Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 8:15 am
ANomad the lines on the hand are too heavy and boxish. They are indeed proportionate, and probably how it looks in real life, but it doesn't fool the eye into reading 'hand.' The figure is cropped in an uneasy spot and it's just floating there on the page. Give it something [depth?] to ground the figure. Othere than that I think this is a nice drawing... but a bad photo. Could you give me some tips on how to improve the problem with the hand? smile The lack of background or definition in the dress was intentional. I wanted my skin and hair to be the only parts of the reference photo in the drawing. I considered adding more to the background to define the figure a little more but I really just like it as is. Sorry again for the bad photo. I don't have my own scanner here at school and I'd feel awkward taking five scans down in the public computer lab of this drawing.
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Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 11:05 am
I didn't realize it was a finished work. As a WIP it looked really great so far, but i agree that that the lack of anything besides the head and the arm isn't working for this composition. it seems like you've just got a lot of negative space in there that isn't doing anything.
Maybe you could fill in the dress and background some other way? Think of collaging or contrasting the rendering of the face with flats or patterns.
The rendering on the face and the hair and hand ARE really great however. I don't think the hand is that off, perhaps it looks weird because there appear to be more hard lines defining the surface where as in the face you just used values to define forms.
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Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 2:07 pm
I understand that there is a large amount of negative space (which I had a problem with at first, too) but I could not think of anything that would fit the piece to put in as a background ... The flat white has a kind of significance for me as well (I would not want to put color in this) because it's kind of like there are two ways you can view the image, as looking down at the figure, laying in bed or on pillows, or that the figure is looking down at you! ... If I put a background I think that kind of ambiguity would be lost. Since this is also a very personal drawing, the lack of definition in anything but the figure is also important to me. No focus or attention is brought to anything else but the figures stare.
I still feel like I should think about this a lot, please help if you have any other suggestions... @@ ...
Thank you both for the constructive comments. smile
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Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 4:43 pm
Page Boy I didn't realize it was a finished work. As a WIP it looked really great so far, but i agree that that the lack of anything besides the head and the arm isn't working for this composition. it seems like you've just got a lot of negative space in there that isn't doing anything. Maybe you could fill in the dress and background some other way? Think of collaging or contrasting the rendering of the face with flats or patterns. The rendering on the face and the hair and hand ARE really great however. I don't think the hand is that off, perhaps it looks weird because there appear to be more hard lines defining the surface where as in the face you just used values to define forms. I would love to see patterns (without regard to volume or form) where the shirt is now. I think that could be really appealing.
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Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 4:45 pm
Aww, cutey.
whee
I love the way the hair is drawn, gorgeous.
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Posted: Tue Jan 23, 2007 6:11 pm
The Iconoclast Page Boy I didn't realize it was a finished work. As a WIP it looked really great so far, but i agree that that the lack of anything besides the head and the arm isn't working for this composition. it seems like you've just got a lot of negative space in there that isn't doing anything. Maybe you could fill in the dress and background some other way? Think of collaging or contrasting the rendering of the face with flats or patterns. The rendering on the face and the hair and hand ARE really great however. I don't think the hand is that off, perhaps it looks weird because there appear to be more hard lines defining the surface where as in the face you just used values to define forms. I would love to see patterns (without regard to volume or form) where the shirt is now. I think that could be really appealing. Perhaps I'll try out different patterns in photoshop first and then decide if it would work or not~ I'll post those here if I do. smile ficklefiend Aww, cutey. whee I love the way the hair is drawn, gorgeous. Thank you :3 I tried really hard on the hair~
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 12:00 am
I love your idea of drawing the viewer's gaze to the stare, but with the negative space and blatantly untouched shirt the plain white draws the eye more. Perhaps the lightest of shading on the shirt would dull it down more so the gaze goes to the intended medium of the picture? The eyes are indeed beautifully drawn and the hand, though slightly too thickly lined, is very realistic. The skintone is wonderful and I love your idea of the ambiguity of the drawing. This is a good drawing, but I think with the slightest of improvements it could become great. Even with the background still negative, a shaded shirt would complete the picture and your goal.
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 8:18 am
Gothik Murder I love your idea of drawing the viewer's gaze to the stare, but with the negative space and blatantly untouched shirt the plain white draws the eye more. Perhaps the lightest of shading on the shirt would dull it down more so the gaze goes to the intended medium of the picture? The eyes are indeed beautifully drawn and the hand, though slightly too thickly lined, is very realistic. The skintone is wonderful and I love your idea of the ambiguity of the drawing. This is a good drawing, but I think with the slightest of improvements it could become great. Even with the background still negative, a shaded shirt would complete the picture and your goal. Perhaps just a light suggestion of a pattern in the shirt might work? I still want it to be very minimal. I'm going to mess around in photoshop a bit when I have time to experiment with patterns in the shirt. :3 Hopefully I can make these improvments soon and post 'em! biggrin
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 8:33 am
I actually really love the contrast between the soft, detailed shading and the starkness of the white space, and especially the harder lines where you've suggested different parts of the shirt. Gives it kind of a surreal quality.
That's just me though, I like things to be simple, and/or odd.
x
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Posted: Thu Jan 25, 2007 3:15 pm
Zebee Gothik Murder I love your idea of drawing the viewer's gaze to the stare, but with the negative space and blatantly untouched shirt the plain white draws the eye more. Perhaps the lightest of shading on the shirt would dull it down more so the gaze goes to the intended medium of the picture? The eyes are indeed beautifully drawn and the hand, though slightly too thickly lined, is very realistic. The skintone is wonderful and I love your idea of the ambiguity of the drawing. This is a good drawing, but I think with the slightest of improvements it could become great. Even with the background still negative, a shaded shirt would complete the picture and your goal. Perhaps just a light suggestion of a pattern in the shirt might work? I still want it to be very minimal. I'm going to mess around in photoshop a bit when I have time to experiment with patterns in the shirt. :3 Hopefully I can make these improvments soon and post 'em! biggrin 3nodding Yes, that would porbably work as well as anything. The slightest hint of a pattern can help the mind to read that it's there, thus allowing them to look at the stare, rather than the shirt. Mess Away. I can't wait to see the further posts. Keep up the good work.
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Posted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 6:54 pm
The hand looks a bit odd, but the face looks youthful and the eyes are magnificent. The hair is also realistic.
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Posted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 10:26 pm
beautiful rendering, I love the way the hair came out. Especially how it really feels like it has weight on the flat white background.
The one thing that jumped out at me, as mentioned, was the white dress on the white background. It gives it a bit of a disembodied arm/head feel. I saw you don't want to shade the dress for various reasons, but what about only shading the top part, near the sleeves and colar? Just to ground the head and arm a little.
Still, top notch work =)
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