Welcome to Gaia! ::

Yeah this seems like something I'd put on xanga or a journal but this is a real life, thingy. And so yeah...^^;

Well here's the thing...I always had crusahes on guys normal things, plobaby He's so hawt, aww I wish I can be his girlfriend! Aww that girls so lucky! That story..But my crushes where ones like Telivision crushes. Something I know I can get, I can freely say yeah I like him yeah he's my man! Even though he aint and that persona is a fictional character. The crushes I had went by as followed:

Inspector Gaget (the movie, the first one)

Wolf (From The Tenth Kingdom)

Spike (From Buffy the Vampire slayer)

Vegita (DBZ)

Gohan (DBZ)

Goku (DBZ)

Inuyasha (still have one on him heart . heart )

Miroku (still have one on him heart . heart )

Sakuya (Kaikan Phrase english verson Sensual phrase )

They are all fictional characters that I can say out loud he's hawt, he's so sexy, ohh I would love to ride his bolagona pony

But as of now, I got two, TWO crushes on guys on my school. The ting I hate most about it, I can't say outloud, 'Yeah I like him, yeah his sexy, yeah I wanna be his girlfriend.' It seriously SUCKS. I can't stare freely and openly goggle at him with a dreamy look on my face and get into day dreaming world. With out getting caught.

The other problems they both know, or at least one is unsure. But for the first one, I am totally am screwed. One day, he downloaded a messnger on my computer. He delated his messnger accounts on just so I wont go on it and such. But when I tried to go on the thing he downlaoded out ups they wasn't permanted delated on my computer.

When I go to sleep, a jealous, raging, being wants to come out. Do damage. And sabatoage. It creeps me out that I sound like Naraku of the screeming and planning needs to be done to do it correctly.

The other problem, the second crush is in my fourth block class!! Oh yeah sure, I try to get peaks at him. My mind wishes that our teachers would change the assinged seats so I can sit next to him. I gave him a present, for laughs and amusement, of being a secert admirer present, I put 'You deck my halls.'

His girlfriend came after me. I was scared shitless! Know what's pretty pathetic now I try to avoid her and her boyfriend.

I guess this just seriously mean I really need a boyfriend 'real life'. .__.;


Oki now that I finished my story, you can all laugh at me.. .________.

Well, sucks to be you.

Although if you're still involved in a relationship, I'd say not too get involved much or just have them as your platonic friend. Nothing beats those friendly innocent hugs ^_^

I shall try not too. But yesturday...More people found out about my crush in fourth block.

._.;

Well on tuesday, our teacher places us in groups to work on open ended question stuff for HSPA. The girl who knew I gave, the guy the present was in my group. The guy I like was sitting right next to me. (Pure torture!)
We was doing or work, blah blah, some of the group is taking. I'm pinching by right hand to pay attention to the work infront of me instead of making goggly eyes at the guy next to me. The girl brings up the topic, did I like (the guy's name)' I said 'no', total lie. She then asked if I was lying, I was stuck abit, more people got into the conversation noticing I was probably blushing my freaking carmel head off!

Then start saying why don't I touch him, touch his butt, touch his book bag or talk to him. I was shaking my head no scaredly and nervously. Half of me wanted to be bold and say 'Heck with his giriflriend!' And touch him and s**t. But the nervous and shy me just kept growing and growing. They kept asking me why, I was to stuck on words to say, 'Because his girlfriend probably come after me again. crying ' Some tears came into my eyes, then they was all like, "Awrr you made her cry!'

I was like, "I'm not crying." With a smile on my face, luckly my hide was saved from the topic from the teachers checking to see if we was working.

So jeah... ._.