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Enky-chan does stand-up!

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Enkzilla
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Mon Dec 25, 2006 10:28 am


Basically if you laugh at my jokes and stories I'll definately try for stand-up!
PostPosted: Mon Dec 25, 2006 4:07 pm


Guilliteen joke:

Well you know the Guilliteen was just the fastest way to do away with people so instead of having hit-and-miss methods like leathal injection and hangings why not bring back the guilliteen? But then you'd have to consider the fact a person's brain would still be alive for four minutes afterwards... so they'd need something to read in the head basket. Obviously it'd only be able to be one page since they can't turn it over or anything... well I have a few suggestions of what it could say:

1) YOU'RE SCREWED!
2) What does the future mean to you?
3) Are you happy with your long-distance call provider?
4) Congratulations! You won the lottery!
5) You've recieved a pardon, effective as of tomorrow.

Enkzilla
Vice Captain


Enkzilla
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Wed Dec 27, 2006 3:46 pm


Dad in a crisis:

You know my dad is fantastic in a crisis. Seriously, one time, he woke me up in the middle of the night. There was plumes of smoke coming up from outside the windows and you could smell the sulfur. As soon as I was sat up he turned to me and said: "Now don't panic but I think the flat underneath us in on fire and we can't get out."

I mean wow. Why not just say "Don't panic but ARGH WE'RE GONNA DIE!!!! PANIC!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" It actually turned out it wasn't the flat underneath us at all and it was some guy torching a bike he stole but do you think that's a fantastic thing to say?
PostPosted: Wed Dec 27, 2006 3:48 pm


Enk's First Joke!:

When I was about 3 or 4 my aunty was going through a book of dinosaurs with me and she pointed and said: "Look, it's a Triceratops."

I turned to her and said, knowing it was silly: "So where's Tricerabottoms!"

Enkzilla
Vice Captain


Enkzilla
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Wed Dec 27, 2006 3:49 pm


Hair dye spray:

Have you ever brought that hair spray that colours your hair? It says on the bottle: Comes out in one wash. Well sure it comes out of your HAIR in one wash but what they forget to mention is it takes three weeks to get rid of the stain it leaves on your bath!!!!
PostPosted: Wed Dec 27, 2006 3:58 pm


My PC part 1:

You know I should of sent it back before setting it up... I mean I should of KNOWN it wouldn't work properly because the manual for my monitor was three times thicker than the manual for my PC!

And in the monitor instructions on what not to clean it with it said:

DO NOT USE WAX.

Wax? Who the HELL cleans their PC monitor with wax?!?!?!?!!?! What are they gonna be saying next?:

DO NOT CLEAN IN YOUR BATH WHILE MONITOR IS PLUGGED IN AND YOU ARE BATHING IN IT!

Enkzilla
Vice Captain


-TehSeph-
Captain

PostPosted: Wed Jan 03, 2007 5:26 pm


Sowwy Enk... The Tricerabottoms one was the only one that made me laugh, and I laughed my a** off for a few minutes.
Maybe you should try not to think about them so much and just let them slip out. 3nodding
PostPosted: Thu Jan 04, 2007 6:14 am


-TehSeph-
Sowwy Enk... The Tricerabottoms one was the only one that made me laugh, and I laughed my a** off for a few minutes.
Maybe you should try not to think about them so much and just let them slip out. 3nodding
Well they often do but then when you tell people later it isn't funny since it was only funny at the time... sweatdrop

Plus humour, like music, is a personal thing! I couldn't possibly make everyone laugh lol!!!

Enkzilla
Vice Captain


Enkzilla
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Sat Jan 06, 2007 11:20 am


Believe or not this is all real:

"Eh waz at?"
"It's a graphic novel."
"Grifick wa?"
"Never mind..."
"Is it porn?"
"No."
"OMIGAWD! It is porn they's naked an' 'as big boobs!"
"She's not naked! It's a metaphor and that's just how anime is drawn!"
"Waz anikmen?"
"Anime is Japanese cartoons."
"Oh! You're reading Pokemon!"
"No I'm reading Oh, My Goddess."
"Then why does it look like Pokemon?"
"It's nothing like Pokemon!"
"But why is it Pokemon then? What's this?"
"It's a keychain of Sailor Venus."
"That's sad... really..."
"Can't you just GO AWAY!"
PostPosted: Tue Jan 09, 2007 2:04 pm


These are all funny except the one with the dinos,like you said,that was silly

Lord RyuuIII


Enkzilla
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Thu Jan 18, 2007 5:15 am


Lord RyuuIII
These are all funny except the one with the dinos,like you said,that was silly
Learn to read baka xp
PostPosted: Fri Jan 19, 2007 6:50 pm


I can read baka baka!

Lord RyuuIII


Enkzilla
Vice Captain

PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2007 11:26 am


Lord RyuuIII
I can read baka baka!
Yo momma!
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