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Just wanted to say that probably this has received no actual responses because everyone here is already a parent, for the most part.

It's also very difficult to label your own parenting style. EVERYONE likes to think that they're fun but fair. No one likes to think they've extremely strict or too easy-going. Also, it flucuates depending on mood, your child's age, current phases and stages, etc. Tough question.

I am a parent and I find the strick but fair way is best. I have two teen boys and a 7 yr old girl. They often recieve complements about being polite, hard working, and dependable people! We respect eachother and neither of my teen boys is rebelling too much!

I like Barbara Coloroso's descriptions of parenting styles Brick Wall, Jellyfish, backbone! A Brick wall is ridgid and unflexable there is no give or understanding just rules and control! The jellyfish just lets kids do what they want sometimes they loose it and go all brick wall and confuse the heck out of the child. Backbones are supportive, flexable but with enough rigidity that the structure is clear!

The keys to raising decent kids are a parental presence, protective bounderies with reasonable flexability, oppertunities to make mistakes and learn from them without being made to feel like too much of an idiot, and lots and lots of love, encouragement, and the odd hand up when they try to run too soon and fall on their faces! This works from day one, bearing in mind that you cannot spoil a baby under 1 year, it is o.k. to cry a little bit, the child will LET YOU KNOW if it needs comforting, and once they can walk let them stand on their own two feet, and sit in time out as needed!

P.s. Hitting has not proven useful to me as a parent, its use actually did more harm than good in our family.

Oh geez, that's brilliant. I agree... lead by example. I get upset when my husband does things and then tells my son not to. I tell him that's hypocritical, confusing and mean.
Granted, there are things adults can do that children shouldn't, but I'm talking about stupid things like feet on the coffee table and whatnot.
I also make a point (because my mom never did) to try to explain everything to my son. In the future, when he asks "Why?" I don't want to yell, "Because I said so!" I used to make my mom so angry because I really, truly wanted to know why so I could understand, and she never gave me reasons. I want to make sure my son understands the reasons for things, so in the future, he doesn't have to ask because he'll know why.

I agree completely. I absolutely cannot stand "because I said so!" parenting.

You tell your kid that he's not allowed to have drugs without telling him why. His friends tell him that drugs are amazing and make you feel totally euphoric. He's now had your silly "because I said so!" Is that really supposed to stop him? He's got absolutely no bad reasons. All he knows is that you are unfairly not letting him do something fun.

See, when I have gets, I'm bringing out my neurochemistry textbook. "Time for a lesson, kids!"


True. But, for the most part, things can be dummed down.

For example, sex is something a lot of parents feel very uncomfortable talking about. It's also something that kids just don't understand. Some may argue that talking about it explicitly will corrupt the kids ( stare yeah, I know...). Well, I got my lesson from a book that showed the mechanics of it using robots. Everything could be simplified and made digestible for a child. I think pretty much everything operates like this. It just takes a bit of creativity.