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 Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 7:09 pm
Journal of A Jailed Man - Sesshoumaru Story
Chapter one: Firsts Day with Journal
Its been days since I saw her soft complection. Being stuck in between this four walls, they only seem to shrink as days go by. I haven't even heard from her since that fatal night. I have banished the night out of my mind. Never to speak of what happened, not to a soul. Yet, here I rest my head. This cruel change of fate hasn't seemed to change for two years now. A person very dear to me gave me this book, I know it has no works. Just endless paper, that only continues to scream out for attention. What my heart wants to scream out loud, my hand will do among this paper. The jailer shall never know of this book, of my story, or that fatal day. I want to see her again, the one who gave me this book. I can't call her by name. I do this to protect her and her family, but mainly her smile. That one smile haunts my every dream. I scream to her and yet she only smiles. My hand reaches to the distance then at that point in time I will yell to her "Come, Don't leave me, Let me protect you. I wont." I failed her, I failed her. I will never forgive myself. I will never forget her smile. The warm tender feeling in her touch, and the way her eyes seemed to draw me close to her. The day we met wasn't anything specail. Why couldn't I protect her, why couldn't I put my life on the line. Why wont anyone tell me if she is okay, I just want to know if she is okay. The walls in cage my body ,but my heart is in peices hang from a thin wire. It only seems to twist and turn at me.
Another day as come and gone. Which only seems to rip through my mind. When will this be over. I had a dream about her again last night. Just a memory of her sitting under a tree, the night sky seemed to bring out her eyes. She gave me a smile again, then faded away. I screamed for her to come back, but it didn't happen. They had given me a chance to call, but I turned them down. Who she even remember who I am, would she care to hear my voice. After I have failed the only one I have ever tried to protect. I desirve nothing more then death. These four walls are keep my heart at a distance, but not only does it do that. But it keeps me away from her. I wont fail someone, if I am not there to promise not to do something in the first place. I wont be there to make her cry. I wont take away that smile, I wont fail, I shoudln't have failed. If I had only been there, if I had only been there when they....
The other day I had seemed to fall asleep, I haven't been sleeping much though. I don't think I can ever be able to sleep until I can see her again. She came today, she doesn't seem to understand the fact that I don't want to ever see her again. I declined her request to talk and heared her scream out my name. It peirced through me like a knife. I want to see her, I want to be able to be in her arm distance. To hold her close, and have her rest her head on my shoulder. Knowing nothing no harm would come to her, as long as I was around. To keep her smiling and laughing, but that day. That fatal day when she lost her smile. I caused, my night mare. I brought it upon her. Why does she haunt my dreams. Why does my heart cry out to her arms and loving touch. I can't stand to hear her voice. She of all people should know its for the best. What brings to her tourcher me so. I will try to call her in the morning.
((Tell me what you think))
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Posted: Mon Dec 11, 2006 7:15 pm
Cyto Journal of A Jailed Man - Sesshoumaru Story Chapter one: Firsts Day with Journal
Its been days since I saw her soft complection. Being stuck in between this four walls, they only seem to shrink as days go by. I haven't even heard from her since that fatal night. I have banished the night out of my mind. Never to speak of what happened, not to a soul. Yet, here I rest my head. This cruel change of fate hasn't seemed to change for two years now. A person very dear to me gave me this book, I know it has no works. Just endless paper, that only continues to scream out for attention. What my heart wants to scream out loud, my hand will do among this paper. The jailer shall never know of this book, of my story, or that fatal day. I want to see her again, the one who gave me this book. I can't call her by name. I do this to protect her and her family, but mainly her smile. That one smile haunts my every dream. I scream to her and yet she only smiles. My hand reaches to the distance then at that point in time I will yell to her "Come, Don't leave me, Let me protect you. I wont." I failed her, I failed her. I will never forgive myself. I will never forget her smile. The warm tender feeling in her touch, and the way her eyes seemed to draw me close to her. The day we met wasn't anything specail. Why couldn't I protect her, why couldn't I put my life on the line. Why wont anyone tell me if she is okay, I just want to know if she is okay. The walls in cage my body ,but my heart is in peices hang from a thin wire. It only seems to twist and turn at me.
Another day as come and gone. Which only seems to rip through my mind. When will this be over. I had a dream about her again last night. Just a memory of her sitting under a tree, the night sky seemed to bring out her eyes. She gave me a smile again, then faded away. I screamed for her to come back, but it didn't happen. They had given me a chance to call, but I turned them down. Who she even remember who I am, would she care to hear my voice. After I have failed the only one I have ever tried to protect. I desirve nothing more then death. These four walls are keep my heart at a distance, but not only does it do that. But it keeps me away from her. I wont fail someone, if I am not there to promise not to do something in the first place. I wont be there to make her cry. I wont take away that smile, I wont fail, I shoudln't have failed. If I had only been there, if I had only been there when they....
The other day I had seemed to fall asleep, I haven't been sleeping much though. I don't think I can ever be able to sleep until I can see her again. She came today, she doesn't seem to understand the fact that I don't want to ever see her again. I declined her request to talk and heared her scream out my name. It peirced through me like a knife. I want to see her, I want to be able to be in her arm distance. To hold her close, and have her rest her head on my shoulder. Knowing nothing no harm would come to her, as long as I was around. To keep her smiling and laughing, but that day. That fatal day when she lost her smile. I caused, my night mare. I brought it upon her. Why does she haunt my dreams. Why does my heart cry out to her arms and loving touch. I can't stand to hear her voice. She of all people should know its for the best. What brings to her tourcher me so. I will try to call her in the morning. ((Tell me what you think))
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