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Infamous Bettie
Crew

PostPosted: Thu Nov 30, 2006 11:50 am


A lone figure stands high upon a cliff face silhouetted by the emblazened sun setting behind. The surrounding clouds lined with a deep crimson drizzled blood red droplets onto the scene below. His damp chesnut hair rose and fell upon the violent winds, the occasional lock flicking into his chilled face. He stared out across the lands below, his eyes, unblinking, locked onto something far in the distance. He stood one foot raised upon a boulder and one hand poised ready on the hilt of his long sword. "I could have saved her" the words poured into the breeze from his lips in a whisper that could barely be heard. A cool tear spilled over his lower eyelid leaving a trail across his cheek that he did not wipe away.
PostPosted: Thu Nov 30, 2006 6:05 pm


"oh well" he shrugged and then he went for tacos!

(you don't ever see that in the movies eek )

I did get confused by

"upon a cliff face silhouetted by"

I feel like eather it's missing a word or I'm miss understanding "silhouetted"

Chex4nothing Muleing4free


Infamous Bettie
Crew

PostPosted: Fri Dec 01, 2006 12:52 am


yfgdd_mule
"oh well" he shrugged and then he went for tacos!

(you don't ever see that in the movies eek )

I did get confused by

"upon a cliff face silhouetted by"

I feel like eather it's missing a word or I'm miss understanding "silhouetted"
a silhouette is when its just a black 2-D veiw of the object becuase there is a bright object behind. You needed to read on the get it.
PostPosted: Tue Dec 05, 2006 3:02 pm


It's quite good biggrin The only thing I have a problem with is the grammar mistakes. Other than that, though, it's a great opener!

ThePhreake

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Submit your writing... Poetry, short stories, essays, whatever...

 
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