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 Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 1:19 pm
((Quick background, Slush is a fifth now (QS gave permission since she fell back on artsies and whatnot.) and he's been dating Isto for a while now. This is taking place after Mauli tells Isto she's pregnant (RP b/w Moo and Lenta later tonight). I think that's it. Don't post unless your X or Moo. ^^))
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 1:30 pm
It was just beginning to grow dark when Isto drove up, the lights on his motorcycle (a gift from Moo's boyfriend at his birthday) not even on. Silently he parked, snapped off the bike, and glanced towards X's house, sighing deeply. He had mixed emotions about actually approaching the place. On one side, it would be good to see Slush again; it had been a few days since they'd last spoken. Though, on another...
Again he sighed, then climbed off the bike and walked slowly towards the porch, reaching it far sooner than he would have hoped. Pausing at the door, he reached out a hand to knock, but hesitated....finally knocking. Someone was bound to have heard the motorcycle, anyway. No backing out now...
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 1:45 pm
X had heard the motorcyle outside and had already called Slush down from his room, since Isto was the only person she knew that owned a motorcycle and would frequently visit. It was then that Slush came tearing down the stairs, he hadn't seen Isto in a couple of days and he missed him, so the idea of him being on their porch was indeed a very good thing for Slush.
Yanking open the door, Slush grinned when he saw Isto there and immediately embraced his boyfriend, moving only to kiss Isto, allowing his lips to linger for a lengthy amount of time before pulling back and whispering.
"I've missed you love..."
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 2:41 pm
Quite the opposite from his normal reaction, Isto felt his heart sink to his stomach with the kiss, but he did his best to disguise it. He managed a weak smile at Slush's words, forcing himself to meet the younger SM's eyes. "Missed you too... Sorry I haven't been around the past few days. Been busy with this and that..."
Trailing off, he fell silent, unsure how to continue. Absently he took Slush's hand in his own, normal one, staring blankly past him to the wall of the house. Finally he shook his head clear and refocused on Slush, smiling faintly and nodding towards the door. "Mind if we head inside? I need to talk to you.."
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 3:13 pm
Something didn't feel right, the kiss seemed off as did Isto being so spacy and unsure of himself, so Slush gave him a curious look and another quick kiss before he led the older SM inside, giving his hand a reassuring squeeze. Slush figured it was important so instead of taking him to the living room where X and Zanna were, he took the two of them to a vacant 'sitting room' several rooms down from where everyone was. Sliding himself down on the couch, he motioned for Isto to take a seat somewhere, there were several chairs and more room on the couch. All the while he gave a curious and warm gaze to Isto, wondering what he needed to talk to him about.
"Sharkie... what's wrong love?"
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 3:24 pm
After shutting the door behind him, Isto followed Slush through the house to the 'sitting room', remaining silent throughout the walk. He slid onto the couch beside Slush, but didn't speak even after Slush's question, simply staring at the floor. Finally he sighed softly and gave Slush's hand a quick squeeze, glancing up to meet his eyes. "I'm going to be...rather blunt about this, because I'm not sure how else to say it. Umm.... Mauli's pregnant, Slush, and... I'm the father."
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 3:55 pm
This wasn't what he was expecting, and Slush was in shock and he could've swore his heart had stopped, but he wasn't paying attention. Slush was just trying to take in what Isto had just said, he felt betrayed, kicked aside, and run over several times with a truck. He was hurt, and the pain was almost unbearable, how could someone who claimed that they loved him do this...? So many thoughts were spinning in his head at once, he felt helpless and he tried to hold back tears as he finally spoke, his voice wavering slightly.
"And... what am I supposed to do about it?"
Slush stood up and let go of Isto's hand in the process, putting some distance between the two of them as he continued to try not to cry. No he will not be weak, he wasn't the one that betrayed their love, his own trust. His hurt and pain turned to hurt anger and it was evident in Slush's voice.
"I couldn't give you a family so you go and... have sex with one of your exs who I thought you had turned gay... just so you can have a child? And I thought you loved me..."
He finally met Isto's eyes with his angry and hurt ones, letting a light scoff before he continued.
"But I guess I was wrong."
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 4:16 pm
"I...thought...that I should be the one to tell you.." Sighing, he pulled his eyes away, staring at the floor. Slush wasn't answering... Not surprising, all things considering. But Isto wasn't sure what to say next... It was something of a relief when Slush finally spoke, but the words stung. Isto reached weakly for Slush's hand when he pulled away, glancing up slightly as he stood. Only to immediately look away from the anger in Slush's voice.
He finally looked up, just in time to catch Slush's eyes, wincing inwardly from his words. Rising to his feet, he again reached for Slush's hand, shaking his head slowly. "No... I would never, I...we were drunk, Slush, it was a complete accident.... I do love you..." Slush thought he'd done it on purpose...? He was drunk! Had he been sober, he would've never even thought of it. It wasn't as if he could remember a thing from that night, anyway. The first bottle, and then waking up the next morning with four more on the floor... "Please, Slush, you have to believe me...."
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 4:51 pm
"Yeah, that makes me feel better... 'I got drunk with my ex girlfriend so the fact that we had sex and I got her pregnant is okay.' Even if you do love me--highly doubtful considering what you did-- you now have a family and child to take care of, I am of no use to you anymore."
Slush let Isto take his hand, but made no move to respond, he was in hysterics now, a blind pain taking over his senses. X had always taught him that trust was the most important part of a relationship, without that it would never work out. Isto had just betrayed his trust, crushing it behind his back, and all Slush wanted to do was cry, but he just continued his pained ranting.
"Did the fact that you PROBABLY woke up naked and in bed with a naked Mauli give you a hint as to what MAY have happened?! Why didn't you tell me then? Why the ******** didn't you tell me then? You never get dressed after sex, you prefer to cuddle afterwards until we fall asleep... and we all know the drunker anyone gets... the more friendlier they tend to ******** get."
His anger was taking over now, shrugging Isto's hand off again as he continued to support his theory, that Isto had hid this from him, and that angered him most of all. They had been living a lie all this time then!
"Why'd you hide it from me? Tell me Isto... Tell me and then go off to your baby's momma, back to your new family."
It was at this point where Slush's voice began to break again, and he reached up to roughly wipe away the tears that were forcing their way out of him. Great, now he was ******** weak too, and to think he was actually planning on marrying Isto in the future.
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:06 pm
Isto remained silent throughout Slush's tirade, or tried to, at least. Every so often he would attempt to speak, only to again fall silent without saying a thing as Slush continued. Isto's face was a mixture of shock and anguish, though his eyes were fixed on the floor, nearly closed as if to block out Slush's words. True, this was very much what he had expected...which was why he had been so reluctant to tell Slush in the first place. But everything was hundreds of times worse now that it was actually happening.
He winced at Slush's final words, and glanced up slightly, speaking quietly, sadly. "I do love you... And I know it wasn't okay, and I would give anything to be able to go back and change it. Mauli and I aren't getting married or anything, we're just friends,. and barely even that at times. The kid... the kid doesn't need me there. Most SMs never know their parents to begin with. At least this one'll have one."
"I know what happened... I didn't say I didn't... But I can't remember any of that actualy night...stuff itself. I can remember the first bottle...and then the next morning I woke up, and Mauli was there, and there were four more bottles on the floor. And.." He abruptly fell silent, sighing softly before continuing. "I should have told you sooner... but I didn't think anything would come of it... I didn't want you to get hurt..."
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:25 pm
"You didn't tell me.... because... you didn't want me to get HURT?!"
Slush practically snarled, which was very rare thing for Slush, but this was the last straw.
"How the ******** does keeping something this important from me...keeping me from not getting hurt?! Cause you know what love...? I'm hurting right now, and I would've been hurting a lot less if you had ******** told me right after it had happened. If you had been HONEST with me... just told me the goddamned truth... I would've forgiven you Isto..."
He looked over at Isto, and it was clear to see that he was crying freely now, tears of hurt and anger trailing down his cheeks. Slush's hand reached into his pocket as he ran his fingers over something in his pocket before he just gripped it and let a sob escape him, which he tried to cover up with a cough.
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:38 pm
By this time, Isto was blinking back tears himself, hardly succeeding in restraining them. Slush wasn't going to forgive him.... He'd all but said it... As much as Isto knew he should just give up, he wouldn't. Somehow they would work this out. They had to. But at the moment, words failed him.
Isto sunk back down to sit on the sofa, holding his face in the palm of his normal hand, eyes tightly closed. He didn't want to see Slush cry because of him. He didn't want Slush to see him crying. Desperately he searched his mind for something to say. Some way to comfort Slush, or some reason why he even deserved forgiveness. There must be something... some way...some reason... But nothing came, only a choked "I'm sorry..."
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Posted: Wed Oct 20, 2004 8:56 pm
Slush saw Isto fighting tears himself, and he felt a stab a pain in his heart, part of him was telling himself that Isto deserved it, but the other part of him, a smaller part of him at this moment, wanted to hold Isto till they both stopped crying. Somehow, Slush had managed to stop his tears, so he walked over so that he was standing above Isto and strengthened his tone.
"Look at me Isto."
He reached down and pulled Isto's hand off of his face with the hand that had previously been in his pocket, sliding the object into Isto's open hand and closing it.
"Take it, I don't need it now. Pawn it if you so choose."
In Isto's hand was a simple gold ring, which if Isto had tried it on, would fit his left ring finger perfectly.
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Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2004 8:44 am
Isto didn't look up, he couldn't have looked up, but he allowed Slush to pull his hand away from his face. His hand closed around the ring, and without even looking he could tell what it was. He couldn't hold back the tears then, entire body shaking slightly from the sobs. His left hand remained closed around the ring, but his right left his face to search nlindly for Slush's hand. Finally he caught hold of it, clinging desperately to this one last reassurace, speaking pleadingly through his tears. "Give me another chance... Please, Slush..."
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Posted: Thu Oct 21, 2004 8:53 am
Slush winced once he heard Isto break down into sobs, he so badly wanted to hold Isto, the man he loved, but he couldn't not after this, not now at least. So instead of following his heart, which he had already cursed and blamed for putting him in this situation to begin with, Slush kept his voice as strong as possible. Even when Isto took his hand, Slush somehow managed to keep from following his damned heart and squeezing it back, instead he kept his hand motionless.
"Give me one good reason, and a simple 'I love you' doesn't ******** count."
He looked down at Isto and then looked away, mumbling softly to himself in a solem tone.
"All I wanted to do was make you happy..."
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