[PRP] The Singer's Sin | Page 1 | Private RPs | Guild Forums

Teh Zan
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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 5:23 pm

This RP thread contains the very well-planned plot for Hikuzu and his coon friend 'Ros.

You may not join and you may not post unless you are given permission and even then there's an order and a way things need to be done. These details have been PMed to you (if you're Steal or Shadda that is).

Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 7:06 pm

Previous Events!

(Red is 'Ros and Deep Sky Blue is Hikuzu)

It started off as a meeting behind a club, after one of Hikuzu's gigs. He stepped out back to leave and met with 'Ros. He began to say something about his music and the conversation goes from there.

'Ros raised an eyebrow, smirking faintly...half in amusement, half in disdain. Ahh...one of those easily affected, it seemed as though he could have more fun with less effort. "I don't know...I couldn't hear hardly over all the mayhem..." Of course, the mayhem was the music...and in reality 'Ros had liked it, but he'd never ever ever say so...for that would be out of character. Why did he care, after all? No, 'Ros really lived only for himself, feigning friendship in few...mild interest in others...but in reality, things fascinated him intensely...he'd been fascinated with Xo, but Lin had cut off that avenue, so now he needed to ease boredom, and Hikuzu seemed the perfect subject...poor kid...

Hikuzu blinked trying to come up with an answer for the other but he couldn't. Strumming another dull chord, which rung in his delicate blonde ears he twitched. What a woven web of life he led. What dreary day when his words didn't touch everyone nor his music let them feel the splendor of it all. No, he wouldn't let himself be affected. That would be too easy, it would be far too easy to fall into dismal dispair once more. And what with Fhyst and Takiro waiting for him back home, he couldn't let that happen. Their faces... he wouldn't be able to tolerate it. So he held his head high, swallowed and smiled, "I'm sorry you couldn't hear it. I played a few rather good ones that the record company even liked."

He grinned, and there was really nothing nice at all in the expression. Poor Hikuzu really had no idea who he was up against, after all...'Ros was a persistent fellow, and the blue-haired musician had caught his interest...and once that happened there was nothing for it. "They all say that..." Came the easy reply, "Just like hiring agencies and recruiters of all sorts...they're all terribly nice and hate to tell amatuers that they are absolutely abominable." Nope. He couldn't be nice. Not even once.

"Amatuer?" Hikuzu had to laugh. "The company I work for doesn't take less then the best, so my work is scrutinized by proffesionals, unlike yourself." Hiku couldn't help putting some bite to his words, sure the guy was mean and maybe his music wasn't the best. But it had heart, and a helluva lot more of it then this guy had. "No one's nice when it comes to the music business."

He laughed softly, aaah...this one would be harder to crack. All the better. Reminded him of that grouchy angel he'd been lucky enough to run into the other day. "My, my...touchy aren't we my little troubadour?" He shrugged, "I never said I was a professional, which means you're simply defensive...questioning your own skills, perhaps?" Oh 'Ros had a heart...and a passion, but it was buried so deep it would have taken an archaelogical dig to bring it to the light.

"..." Hikuzu was left positively speechless. Was this the truth of it all? Was he still so broken from his relapse that he doubted his heart's very lyrics? His very existance which was harnessed in single pieces of music? His heart was portrayed in the painful lyrics and his soul only anchored down by the two boys waiting for him at home. But this man... this man said such heartless things that hurt and Hikuzu wanted to bury himself back in his safe sad musicless world where everything was dead. He himself included. Frowning he shook without reason, "N-no. It is you who doubts yourself, for you have nothing b-better to do then t-torment others..." His stutter could not be contained. He had changed so much after his relapse, it was as if the smiling Hikuzu from days of old was forever gone. That the forever happy boy with long electric blue hair and sharp red eyes would never return and that this scared man was all that was left of the once seemingly proud rock star. It was sad... and pathetic... and almost... pitiable.

'Ros leaned forwards, raising an eyebrow, "What? No smart retort for me? You really should not verbally retaliate if you are not prepared to spar." Perhaps some day, if this one earned it, 'Ros would deem to be nice to him. But not yet...no definitely not in the foreseeable future. He wanted to see if he could manipulate this one as completely as he had Xo...just differently, because this one was unique.

"No retort? Hm?" Hikuzu scoffed and a fire returned to his dreary face and lit his eyes back up to their full scary potential. Hiku's eyes were known for never ever looking gentle, they were always harsh and evil and filled with the red fire of hell... and no matter how much warmth he put in his voice or how soft his smile was, he could never soften those eyes... until his relapse. But now... now they burned again. Burned with a passion. "I don't need to play silly mind games with an attention deprived bully..." He replied smartly. Sure, that was a childish remark, and sure, standing up for himself wasn't something he had done in a long time -no one bullied him or his little brother anymore- but he didn't think he could let himself be pushed around. Putting the smile back on his face he said, "If you want to fight, it should be with fists not words."

'Ros's own eyes were golden, sparkling with an intense dislike of everything and everyone...even himself, if one chose to realize it. He was a damaged soul, but he had accepted that fact about himself a long time ago, embraced it, and hidden whatever redeeming qualities he had away along with his past. And he was not afraid of this one. "Attention deprived?" He clucked his tongue, "Tsk, tsk...I get all the attention I want because I -demand- it..." Not entirely true, for no one gave him willing attention...what he probably needed. "..I think you're the one who is in need of such attention..." Raising a hand, he slowly curled his fingers into a fist. "And if you want to fight physically...I daresay you would lose against me...and words usually don't make people wind up in the hospital."

"I daresay you'll find the record company tossing you in irons just as quickly as you can put me in said hospital," spat Hikuzu right back. He was beginning to get slightly ticked at this man. Firstly for hurting his the little sanity he had left, secondly for dissing his music and thirdly... for just being an a*****e.

He laughed, "I have yet to put anyone in the hospital...I daresay you need not fret for your health....or that pretty face of yours." If he'd known the other was simply slightly ticked, he'd have pressed to do better, but now he was trying another tactic...hmm...oh yes...he could be an utter a** indeed.

That... pretty... what? Hikuzu blinked a few times at the taunt. He wasn't amused, to say the very least. His lips pursed and he let his guitar fall from his hands to settle on it's strap about his waist. "I don't fear my health, nor do I fear you..."

Ha...it had done the trick. "Good..." he smiled ever so pleasantly, "I'd be terribly wounded if you decided to shy away from my presence." Sarcasm was rife in the sentence, but even if the other did try to avoid him, the coon was very very proficient at pursueing.

Now Hikuzu was positively baffled. The b*****d had his sarcasm, had his rudeness but didn't have his compliments and Hiku took a nervous step backwards. "What reason have you given me to leave or to stay?"

He was good at baffling people...it amused him. "Good enough question, I should think I've both intriuged you and insulted you and therefore that is reason enough for both in my ever so humble opinion." Ah, more sarcasm. He took an equal step forward, so the distance was default once more.

Another step back, and another, and he was right back to the wall of the club he'd just left. He wasn't afraid, was he? Then why did he back up like this? No... and then he took a step forward. "What is it you want?"

"Back and forward, hmm? What is this? A dance?" With a chuckle, 'Ros grinned again, winking in a gesture that was almost playful. "What I want? Frankly, I haven't decided yet!" He declared without a hint of shame.

Two could play at this game, and easily his stood his full height and let his eyes sink onto the other. A gust of wind took his blue hair about him and his wings flexed earily. "Then may I offer my assisstance?"

Canting his head to one side, the coon smirked faintly, "If you think you have the wits for it, then by all means, attempt to persuade me as to what I want." He wasn't afraid in the least...he'd seen far stranger things than this.

The angelic fox put a smooth voice on and purred out, "You want to leave." His ears slicked back and he took another step forward, half menacing and half seductively. Hikuzu was dancing a dance he hadn't learned but his relapse showed him that one had to dance on more then one stage before becoming comfortable with all of it. His tail swished and he hummed low in his throat as if about to sing, which he did on a whim every once in a while. Free concerts were fairly common for the soon-to-be famous rock star.

Aaah...now this was most interesting, most intriuging...and he -liked- it. "Why would I want to do that?" His own voice had dropped down an octave, just letting the other get closer, for he could play whatever game the other chose...he just made his own rules. "I'm even less inclined to do so now..."

"Why?" Hikuzu chimed, his voice still soft and level. His sharp eyes dove into the other, trying to see through it all and sort out the wretched jerk from the rest of it all. An impossible task. The song was playing in his head, on his lips, in his fingers. Unconciously his hands took his guitar and strummed the right chord he saw in his mind... the words playing off his lips soundlessly.

He smirked faintly, "Because...you're rather hyptonizing when you do that..." Dear lords of heaven, had that actually been a compliment? Perhaps...but his tone was deceptive, carefully masking it in deceit as he did everything else. Even if he honestly liked Hikuzu, he would treat him with the same sort of easygoing contempt, more than likely.

Hikuzu wasn't listening anymore to the taunts of the other. They were fake lies to his ears, whether they were or not it didn't matter he supposed. For the sound came out. The melodious note. It was his heart's note and it was painful. It was a concert just for 'Ros and it hurt. He sang of the truth, a popular angsty song that... when up close and personal... it looked so painful that Hikuzu should've crumpled on the floor.

He sighed, but it was melancholy, almost as though affected by the song. Yes, he was ready to attack the other with his words again should he feel the need to. Eyes lidded, as for once, he stood respectfully and listened, for what could he do? In truth, he did not wish to interrupt, and had convinced himself that it was entirely what he desired.

Without realizing it he snapped back, voice of angels cut off. That gorgeous heavenly voice was gone and his face flushed, what had he done? In front of an ... enemy? How wrong could you get?! "I..." He didn't have any words and was suprised the other had no comments, though surely now he'd have something mean to say and Hiku did not want to hear it.

His eyes opened, wide and golden, and he laughed softly, "You look a bit flustered...you shouldn't..." It was as much in way of a compliment as the other was going to get. Perhaps...perhaps music was the key to 'Ros's soul...and then again, perhaps not. "I hate admitting that I'm wrong..." the coon put his hands behind his back. "...so I won't..." Grinning teasingly, it seemed that he was in a good mood, though not a vindictive or overly cruel one. "You always sing for people you just meet on the street?"

"Not... intentionally..." Hikuzu said, still unable to find his words. He let his silky electric blue hair fall into his dazzling eyes and allowed the guitar to fall limp at his side. The other wasn't as harsh going as Hiku had thought and so he brightened for a moment, almost close to his perma-cheerful self, which was sickeningly cute.

He raised an eyebrow, "So that was a rare occurence...odd...I wouldn't think you'd do something like that in front of me of all people..." 'Ros was curious, which meant he had lost some of his edge for the moment. "You have any idea what that means, my little troubadour?" Of course, the coon did not know either, ergo, the question was a sincere one.

"I'm sorry..." Hikuzu said absently. Then his red eyes pierced into the other yet again and he tried to force a smile, wanting to be friends with the oddly rude man before him. "...I wish I did..." He half did but his idea of friends would not be a welcome one, he knew.

He smiled, matching the expression almost flawlessly. "You do not no the reason behind your song? My dear boy, I think you should discover it...or else you might be just wasting your time." Perhaps twas an insult, or perhaps it was not...'Ros was on that borderline, the one where he might taunt, or make an effort to reconcile...but whatever he chose, the decision had not been made yet.

"I know the meaning of my song!" He said defensively in an over-loud tone. "I just don't know what impact it has on you or why I sung it..." Wow, that was surely the lamest exscuse ever and he should've been kicked for it.

"What impact it has on me?" He smirked faintly, "That is something that you shall also have to find out for yourself, in time...perhaps none, perhaps much...but the reason you sing...I did not say the meaning, but the -reason-, little singer...for meaning without reason is lost and left to drift without purpose." And now he was decidedly philosophical, a musing expression on his face.

Meaning without reason, Hikuzu pondered. His reason had never existed, it had always been for happiness and the songs meanings had told themselves but now he was left confuse. "Then what reason am I to have?" He was now seeking wisdom of the other, although perhaps not realizing it.

No reason...the other did not posess one...it was almost terrifying in that realization. 'Ros had a reason, however petty and insubstantial, he always had a reason, even if that was to please himself and forget all else. But he remembered...a time when he himself had had none, and it was like wandering blind. "You must discover it for yourself..." He said quietly, "Heh..." His smile seemed cocky, but was in truth forced, "...I cannot chose that for you, for everyone has their own...some more fulfilling than others."

"I can't have a reason without having something to want out of it, correct?" Hikuzu said trying to understand the other. It was hard and painful because the other said things that were true that he had tried avoiding... and no longer could. Apparently. "...why must I have one?"

He shook his head, "You don't have to want something from it...a reason is simply...something you work for, not towards. It is what drives you...something behind and not in front, always at your back." It was almost like describing a relationship, in some ways, but 'Ros had never had that particular basis for a reason, never had really cared to.

"Like ..." Hikuzu began and then stopped. The boys were a reason to do things but he didn't think of them like that. "... what if the reason you have cannot be seen as a true reason?"

He raised an eyebrow, confused by the other's words. "A true reason?" A hollow laugh escaped his lips, "Who is to decide whether that reason is true or no? For if one were to examine, you would probably judge that -my- reason is not a true or valid one, but I have no other, so it serves me."

"I see..." Hikuzu said blinking his fiery red eyes. "What if the reason I have doesn't seem like it's enough?" For surely, in Hiku's head, it was not. The boys ... well they'd grow up and they'd move on. They couldn't be his reason forever.

"Then..." He hardly hesitated as he spoke, for this he well knew the answer to. "...You must find another, to sustain you when the first is gone." In the back of his mind, he wondered how this had gone from a verbal war to a Q & A session.

Easy words would not come, subtle answers would not reveal themselves. The world was hazed around the two of them for the singer and he knew not the words to speak. "Then my life is without purpose is that what you're telling me?"

He smiled again, this one half in pity and half in true amusement, "No. It is half without. It is meaning without drive, and you are searching without knowing what you are looking for...those are the things you really need to decide...will you continue to wander or will you discover a steady course? A true one?"

Hikuzu nodded mindlessly, having nothing else to voice to the other. His musical words had left him, his philosophies and questions died in his mouth. He felt like a used tissue, used for a bit and then carelessly tossed aside. He figured he'd never meet this incredible man again and that they could never be friends but Hikuzu wanted to understand more about this... meaning without drive. Where to start? Perhaps... in jealousy? His life was only once driven by his desire for his brother, a desire he could never have that was covered with a smile always fake behind a heart that was always black. Hikuzu wasn't all sugar and spice... he was harsh inside and that harshness never welled to the surface. It glinted behind his eyes as he debated an answer. Surely the other wasn't in the mood for a little family history lesson. Neh?

He leaned in close, a faint smirk on his features, "Is there so much to contemplate, my little troubadour?" It seemed that he'd officially decided on that one as his nickname for Hikuzu...it could definitely have been worse. "You seem to be wandering about again, in a far more dangerous realm than the one the eyes can see...." Yes, the mind was the most dangerous journey of all, some so convoluted that you could get trapped within the darkests corridors...such was 'Ros's mind, but he was careful...careful not to touch those things which might ensnare him.

Hikuzu's eyes focused in on the man before him. The taunting vicious coon with whom he was so intrigued... the very man with whom he was previously exchanging threats. How could such a man hold his attention so fully now? It was odd. Hikuzu was beyond understanding. "And if I get lost it should be my own fault... right?" He said spitefully, without really knowing why.

"Perhaps..." He took the other's tone easily, it meant nothing to him. "But I find that sometimes, the person is more affected by others than himself, am I right?" 'Ros was perceptive, and that was what made him dangerous...what made him so good at the abuse of others. But now he wasn't trying to drag the other's pain out into the open, he was simply...curious...intruiged...fascinated.

"Yes..." Hikuzu said calming down from the words. It was an easy-going reply that made Hikuzu step back -not literally- and rejudge this man. "...I'm sorry, I forgot if I caught your name..." Oh of all the times and wrong things to say, this was possibly the worst!

He laughed, laughed outright. "'Ros...I'm quite ashamed that you've forgotten it already...or did that sojourn into memory cause it to get lost in the dusty cobwebs somewhere?" It was a natural reply for him...typical.

"N-no..." Hikuzu was back to stuttering again. "I'm sorry 'Ros. I really didn't mean to forget ..." He hadn't even realized he'd been insulted, only that he had insulted the other. Or had he? He wasn't quite sure 'Ros cared about it, nor much else. Was there a reason for the other being this way and a reason for them meeting and talking like this? It was all so very strange.

Of course there was a reason that the other was this way...though these habits might be ingrained, something had surely started them. "No one means to forget..." He chuckled, "As surely as you didn't...and so long as you do it again I shan't worry about the state of your mental health overmuch." As for a reason for them meeting? That was yet to be seen.

"I won't." Hikuzu promised with a slight laugh, as if the topic was happier. Hikuzu felt that he had a bit more time to talk with the other, which was all he really wanted. The others philosophies caught him up and swirled him around and he wanted more. Like a drug addict, he'd gotten his first taste and was hooked. However, the coon wasn't a drug, he was knowledge.

'Ros was experienced, if nothing else, mind having collected and stored information that many twice his age had not discovered. It was a skill and he used it...but usually not like this...no, not like this...but to annoy and torment and drive others nearly to madness. To actually bestow that knowledge upon others was a new thing for him...and he too found something intoxicating in the experience, though one never would have guessed. "See to it." With a lopsided grin, he winked. Lucky wasn't he, that he had no place to be?

Hikuzu was positive then, from the near friendly gesture of the other, that they could be friends. Hiku wanted to make sure he never saw that taunting side again because this side taught him things he craved. "...so .. what're you doing out here anyway?" Finally, the question came. Why had 'Ros been here and why had their conversation begun?

He shrugged, "I was dragging a friend of mine around just to get on his nerves, but the bookworm went skittering..." Hell, he didn't know -when- Saryn had disappeared, just that he had. Ah well... "Then I noticed you, and you were interesting." The answer was truthful enough. 'Ros never bothered people unless they were interesting.

An electric blue haired rock star was interesting these days? Who'd have thunk it? Sarcasm rolled around in his mind at this and he smiled widely, "I see... so am I still as interesting as you thought I was?" He folded his arms across his chest and the chain from his wristband jingled which in turn drew attention to the markings on his arm.

Yes, he was distracted, eyes flickering down to the small sound. "Indeed you are..." His gaze flitted back to the other's face, and those strange crimson eyes. "Perhaps moreso now..." And he was not at all afraid of admitting things...not usually. But one had to poke around a bit to get the answer one wanted...usually...

Metallic wings flexed noiselessly behind him, and the angelic fox tilted his head and flicked back blonde ears which in turn ruffled his electric locks. Those same blood eyes were being forced to a softness he could not control and made them look only more fierce in actuality, it was almost as if Hikuzu was trying to do something he could not explain. Folded arms adjusted so that he could lay his chin in the palm of one hand and gaze at the coon, "Is that bad?"

He smiled easily, an almost friendly expression, though he was never entirely open. "It depends...it depends on whether you will tolerate me and we'll actually get on to some extent, or whether I will annoy you to the point of insanity and you will go away." No, he'd never been accused of NOT being blunt...oh I daresay not.

The ease caught Hiku's breath, it was if he really thought of himself as a messenger of all things bad and his rare smiles were playful teasings only to trick one into believing he was nice. Hikuzu had to wonder why the other acted this way, though of course it was none of his business and since Hiku was much less blunt then 'Ros happened to be, he spoke plainly, "I really don't think you can annoy me to the point of insanity 'Ros."

In truth, that was sort of the way he did view things. Because it was his way of keeping people away from him, and it amused him to no extent, so why not do it? Serving a dual purpose, the coon had isolated himself in a way more effective than physical walls. "Oh really? That would be...hmm...three people who don't think I'm the most annoying creature they've ever met...dear dear...I really am in shabby form, aren't I?"

This produced a grin from the musician and moving his hand to wind fingers around his silky hair, he directed this smile towards the other. "If your goal is to push people away, then you certainly are failing. Perhaps you shouldn't be so amusing yourself..." It was a chiding remark from the smart-aleck kid who didn't understand the difference between popcorn and soda. What a shame...

He bowed melodramatically at the waist, "Ah, my chief failing is being a wit, I admire that you have pointed it out with such accuracy..." Again, teasing and sarcasm were rife within the words. "...usually my subjects do not survive the initial onslaught." And another wink from a deep golden eye. In some ways, perhaps the two were not so different...and then again, there was a grand contrast.

The half-fox could only watch in silent amusement as the others sarcastic jeers were taken all in fun. His sensitivity had dulled and he had gone back to forever smiling a smile that was only as true as he was a fox -this would be half for those who cannot count-. "So is your little onslaught all a game? Like the rest of you?"

He grinned mischieviously, "You are assuming that I am a game in my entirety. And in that you would be wrong. My onslaught is usually entirely for my own amusement...and perhaps entertaining for those who can keep up or tolerate, of which those are a precious few." It's just because 'Ros would wear a hole in someone, if allowed to keep on...which he often did...the coon had the persistence of a mule...and just as hard a head, or so they say.

"What amusement, pray tell, do you get from bothering others?" Hikuzu was trying in vain to slightly mock the high and mighty tone the other's voice seemed to constantly wear. It was if he himself was a lowly commoner picking up fancy words and using them to his advantage, and this went quite well considering. Considering what? ...who knows!

"It's amazing how amusing the reactions of irritated people can be when you don't take anything they do personally..." 'Ros nodded in an entirely insincere sagely nod. Noting the attempted mimicry, he was again amused, a smile pressing at the corners of his lips. He rather liked this one. Not in that big-brother way that he liked Lochlan or not in the partner-in-crime way that he got along with Tavion, but in another way he had yet to identify. Ah well...the more the merrier.

"...really? I wouldn't know." There was an untouched innocence about the rock star that made him seem rather oblivious to the world's inner clockwork. However, it didn't affect his pretty face, sharp blood eyes, nor his ability to sing. Once it had affected the latter, and perhaps it was again for the words of 'Ros stirred things Hiku desired. Such as a reason. He had sung because he had loved his brother, a wrong doing on his part. And that failed him for it was the wrong sort of love. Now he sang for the boys back home, the orphans he had taken in and cared for. But after them... he'd be left alone... his friends long gone. Had he really ever had any or could 'Ros be his first? The red eyes flickered sadly as if betraying his unease to the other.

'Ros tilted his head, rocking forwards on his heels. "Perhaps you have not known enough of life...and perchance that is not so terrible a thing...it means you are probably a much better fellow than I..." A soft, almost musical laugh, rich in its tones accompanied his words. "Sometimes it is best to understand that which you fear....and then know how to fix it...I simply understand the fears and insecurities of others better than most, and they say it is not at all to my credit."

That was a lot of things to react to and the poor angelic fox didn't know where to start. There seemed to be a bitter sadness in the other that he ... didn't like, but accepted and Hikuzu frowned upon that. "I don't think you're a bad person..." he started, "...and if you understand fears, then please tell me if you know of mine?" Hikuzu had gotten a little weaker in his statements, and sounded sad himself, but he was curious. If perhaps maybe more words and more philosophies could save them both from unhappiness so vile.

If 'Ros had known that any of what he glumly called his 'true nature' had been showing through, he would have immediately gone back to sniping, but as it was, his mind was far too occupied and he went on. "Perhaps not bad...but certainly not something wonderful..." With a mirthless sort of chuckle, he again spoke, "Yours...you are afraid of being left alone...that there will be no one for you...you are afraid, but you don't entirely understand it, and this you also fear."

Hikuzu's mouth was left agape, for having his fears so bluntly and so correctly laid out in front of him was something he hadn't expected even as he had askedf the question. He nodded, fiddling with his fingers and his eyes fell to his feet, "There never is anyone for me, I have no friends and at home I have only orphans that I took in. When they leave, my music ... it'll die again and ... I don't want that..." Yes, he truly was a pathetic sad lump of emo-ness. But he was an adorable pathetic sad lump of emo-ness who just wanted some friends.

He sighed, for once he actually hated doing this...and he wasn't sure why. Perhaps it was because so much of himself was revealed here as well. "Hey...who is to say that the future will not change things? You're an able fellow...go out and make that -different-. If you need friends, find one...hell, find a lover if that suits you better. I'm quite sure you aren't entirely bereft of those who have an interest in you, my little troubadour."

Blinking with a dawn of realization slowly pooling over him, he looked up to the other and smiled slightly at the nickname, "You have an interest in me don't you? You'll be my friend?" It seemed almost a desperate plea for the thing he'd wanted all along. Just to have the other's comforting words close, and the other's useful advice... if Hikuzu could be friends with this man he felt that he could believe in things getting better.

He too blinked, taken aback by those words. 'Ros hadn't expected that, truly hadn't. No one had ever asked him to be their friend before...mostly because most people wanted him to stay the hell away. A range of emotions crossed his face for fleeting seconds, and then it was gone again. "I suppose...that I could..." He finally answered, nodding, the thought serious. So long as this didn't become high maintenence, then all was fine...right?

A wave of relief crossed over his face and his ears perked up happily. Those red eyes of his, although sharp, gave off a warm glow instead of a bad one. "You mean that don't you..." It wasn't a question but a soft disbelieving and happy statement. A friend made with the random man he'd met outside of a club, what a night. Fiddling with his guitar strap he tilted his head, and looked at the other, trying to find words to say what he was thinking. Then he paused, he was sure the other would already know... and perhaps would be bothered. And at this, his mouth clamped shut.

He nodded again, his look serious, but broken by the hints of a smile tugging at the corners of his mouth. "I mean it. I mean precious few things, but I mean this." Leaning forward, as though he'd understood the motion, he came nose to nose with the angelic fox, ears swiveling. "And I might be smart, but I can't read minds..."

Taken aback, Hikuzu could not move. His red eyes were fixated on the ones before him and he knew he'd made the right decision. The other could set him straight and be serious about it too and in time perhaps Hikuzu could even help to soften the other (with or without his consent). "I... ..thank you," were the only words he could splutter out.

He laughed, "Don't thank me...I'm sure you'll be sick of me before the week is out." With another wink, he pulled back, giving the other another one of those unfathomable looks. "You really do need to just be a wee bit more assertive..."

"Impossible..." the angel-fox breathed in an almost inaudible whisper. And then shaking back into the real world as the other moved away he gave a pathetic 'I'm-sorry-I'm-so-pathetic-please-forgive-me' look that was nonsarcastic.

He chuckled, but this time the sound was friendly. "I'm terribly flattered you think so, dear boy...so don't look like a kicked puppy, if you please...I'm not even trying." Now if he had been, that might have amused him, but he wasn't and it didn't.

Smiling as he was forgiven and accepted by the other he laughed in a quiet happy voice that proved his voice was as golden in laughter as it was in music. "Alright... do you have something to do right now? Or would you like to come with me?"

He shrugged, "I don't see why not...I have nothing better to do..." It was strange, the other had a nice laugh...the same way that 'Ros enjoyed the angelic fox's music he strangely found himself caught up in that sound. No...he'd never met anyone like this before...so very very fascinating.

Hikuzu moved around the other so now it was the other nearer to the outer wall of the club, and he took a smiling step backwards, grinning at the other. The mischevious way he showed happiness was amusing, and he knew not else how to show it. Red eyes sparkled as he spoke, "Good, then come grab some food with me? I usually get something to eat after my gigs." His wings flexed again, those dazzling pieces of metal upon his back were eye-catchingly amazing and as the moonlight fell over the world Hikuzu was sure that the only thing around was the two of them and that suited him just fine. The cool night air with his friend nearby was better then the sweating heat of all the bodies in the club.

His golden eyes seemed to glow as he considered the other...watching as he moved, "Mmm...I never object to food..." Came the easy reply, "And gigs is such a strange word, wouldn't you say?" That last almost absently. Pushing his glasses further up on his nose, the coon glanced at the other expectantly, as though wordlessly saying that the entire decision belonged to Hikuzu.

"Yea... it is..." Hikuzu said smiling and reaching out. It was an odd gesture but after a moment it was obvious he wanted to take the other's hand and bring him along. "My treat..." He beamed at the other happily, enjoying the way his newest friend seemed to look and move and ... enjoying the way the other simply existed.

And he eyed that hand a moment, as though worried that it might bite, before slowly, ever so slowly, with a hesitance that was not characteristic of him, he took it. "I suppose I'm not allowed to be snide about that..." He murmured, again canting his head to better observe the other.

(Continued...)

Teh Zan
Crew

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Teh Zan
Crew

Offline

Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 7:43 pm

Due to a problem with MSN we lost a bit of this part of the conversation. But the two of them end up in a cute little cafe, sitting together in the corner and ordering stuff.

"....will have the same..." He called over to Alfi, who busied himself with things. Hikuzu quickly found he didn't want to look anywhere else but 'Ros because 'Ros was the only thing 'real' in his entire world and he clung to it. Reaching out and taking the others hand again he brought the other to a table he always sat at. It was in the corner and was a place he wouldn't disturbed. "I always sit here..." He whispered, as if it needed an explanation.

He did not at all mind the contact, for he had been raised in the sort of environment where it was natural, and the signifigance of it pleased him. "Ah...so you really are a regular..." Not saying it as though he'd been questioning the other's words in the first place, but just as a sort of affirmation. With a teasing smile, he pressed on. "Nice little spot it is..." Saying without actually saying, a habit of his, that he liked the other's taste.

"Yea..." Hikuzu said softly as he took a comfortable seat in the squishy chair that was seated around the small table and backed against the wall. Reluctantly he let his hand slip from the other as he curled himself up in the chair and laid his chin on his knees, staring at the other, "Go ahead and sit..."

And he did, sliding as close to Hikuzu as he might, smiling. "I shall...so tell me a bit about yourself, my little troubadour...it is a shame to be so interested in a person and to be so profoundly lacking in knowledge of them..." Yes indeed, he wanted to know everything, but a little would suffice. For now.

Hikuzu's eyes slid closed and he listened to his own rhythmic heartbeat and breathing for a moment before opening those crimson eyes and looking at the other. "What do you want to know?" He spoke with a calmness that said he beyond himself but grateful for the other's company.

"Anything you're willing to tell me..." He waggled a finger at the other's nose, "Because there's plenty you hide behind those strange eyes of yours, my dear boy..." Yes, he knew that much, lightly accented voice faintly bemused and mostly curious.

Those blonde fox ears of his flickered back meekly and he sighed, "I'll tell you anything. So it might as well start from the beginning, neh?" He lifted his head to fake another smile and then went on, "However... I don't know where that beginning is. So I'll just start with a statement... I was in love with my brother." At that moment the smile faded and Alfi came over and set the food down, bowed and left again. Hikuzu said nothing, waiting for a reaction.

He shrugged, "It happens...and sometimes I almost think people get far too excited about such things...doesn't do THEM any harm I don't see why they rant about something that doesn't concern them." He tapped the other's knee, "Do go on...and you don't have to smile...you can show what you feel...it doesn't make sense to conceal if you don't do it well."

Hikuzu nodded, not even able to release a laugh at the other and simply going on as he looked away at the steaming soup, "Needless to say, our parents were not please and nor was my brother. He and I were close... heck we're fraternal twins. I was jealous of his new boyfriend and ever since I was little I used to smile for hours and then have random fits of anger. My anger relapsed on me and I couldn't sing anymore. I saw Aure's face and I lost it... I didn't want to live. Then I met Rose... and Rose ... god its so fuzzy now... but I remember he was sweet... and I made him cry. I made Aure cry too... and that's when I met them. Two courageous little boys with more music and purpose in their lives then I had. They spoke words I could understand ... and I clung to it. Still I am unhappy though. The music I sing has feeling, but no reason... and I can't find anything anymore. I feel even worse then before even when I have such sweet kids beside me." Hikuzu laughed heavily and closed his blood-red eyes, tears welling up in them. "I'm sorry...."

He reached out, and no longer resisting ever-present temptation, began to comb his fingers through shimmering blue hair. "Sorry? You're apologizing to -me-?" He laughed quietly, though it was somewhat sad, somehow. "I think the one you owe an apology to is yourself...you've been utterly miserable over something you cannot even help..." 'Ros sighed, "I'm being an utter hypocrite right now, but it doesn't matter...don't be sorry...change it...you're the only one who can."

"I..." He looked up at 'Ros shocked and was once again short of breath and words and then finally he found words, curling up tighter to himself and enjoying the feeling of the other running fingers through his silky hair. "I don't know how," he choked. "I don't want to forgive myself because I'm a fool... a real fool..."

He curled a bit of it around his finger, mulling over something in his mind. "Everyone is a fool, my little troubadour, they are simply one to different degrees and for different reasons...I myself am a grand fool, and not afraid to admit it, and I don't wallow in my own angst either..."

"Then you are disgusted by me for being as I am?" Hikuzu dreaded the answer and quickly wondered why he asked the question. Reaching out with a delicate hand he took the one that was entangled in his hair and placed his own over it gently. "...I ... didn't .... I don't..." He was muttering random comments and fell off lamely, the tears claiming streaks on his fragile face.

"Hey now..." With a sigh, he released the other's hair, turning his hand over so that his fingers could wrap around the other's palm. "...Did this one say that?" He chuckled softly, "You take too much to heart, Hikuzu..." And yes, he said the other's name...for the first time since their introduction. "Why the tears? It's not as though you have done some great wrong to lament over..."

"I have wronged my family, I have wronged myself... my life is a pox upon the earth, it is..." He whispered to the other, gripping his hand tighter, the tears flowed silently down his face. He buried his face into his knees, not wanting to look at the other on account of being ashamed. To show such real and raw emotions to such a new friend was odd, for anyone... but especially the troubadour. He was lost, in pain and found such huge comfort in 'Ros that he was not keen on giving it up. Oh pitious world that would take such beautiful life and taint it so horridly only to grant its reprieve in a cruel and cold man who's problems became one's solutions. It was a tangled web and nothing less.

"Hey...that sounds like a preamble to suicide, and that's not at all a nice experience or so they tell me..." Leaning over, he came level with the other, so that should Hikuzu look up, he'd be staring directly into a pair of golden eyes. "You have wronged yourself...far more than you have wronged others...and even if you can't -forgive- yourself, you must understand that you have to move past it...forgive and forget is perhaps outdated, but fund something that is better than all of this self-hatred..."

"I..." And Hikuzu did look up into those golden eyes and the tears stopped, the last few rolling their salty lives away down his cheeks. "I..." Where were the words? Why couldn't they come? It was because he was right, wasn't it? Because Hikuzu was terrible like that. Right? No. No he couldn't think that way again. Again and again all the negativity overwhelmed him and he hated it. Wetting his lips he took a deep shuddering breath and blinked his crimson eyes at the golden ones before him, "How can I move past it when I seem so caught in it? My music, my heart, my soul... my life... it's been this way for so long... help me 'Ros... gods please help me..." There he went again, crying to the other in words of begging solitude that called out his weaknesses.

With another sigh, he released the other's hand only to scoot next to him and put an arm about his shoulders. Hikuzu was falling apart and 'Ros found himself not at all minding the challenge that putting him back together would be. "Hopeless now...perhaps so...but do you so terribly want my help? I have a patched soul as it is...ah, my little troubadour...I think it will all heal in time...but you must give it that time...your past is still an aching wound in the very fiber of your being." So like himself, once upon a time.

Hikuzu was lost to the other's words, and lost to himself. The soup sat there, getting cold which was essentially fine one could suppose. Soup tasted fine either way, unlike pain. Pain was horrible all the way around. Sharp pointy terrible pain. The 'little troubadour' found himself suddenly clinging to the other, "Yes.. yes please I want your help. I want to be able to sing songs that can help you too... I want to be able to sing painless music. Please... I ... how long will it take till this pain goes away? I want it to go away..."

He chuckled, again, without any semblence of joy or pleasure, "You wish to help me as well? Noble of you...but let's work on fixing you first." Again, his fingers started to run in a soothing, repetitive motion through shimmering cerulean. "The pain...it dulls...like anything...and eventually something works its merry way between that pain and you...and you almost never feel it...It will go away...but you have to work at -living-...or else it stays and devours you..." And 'Ros had the feeling that he'd get to see the entire process, as he had in himself...save the barriers between that pain and the coon were false ones.

He bit his lower lip, ears still pressed flat to his head as he calmed himself by the others stroking touch. Yes, it felt so good to be comforted by a touch. It wasn't from who he had expected, but that didn't make it feel any less good. "Music is my life... so ... I have to work on my music?" He whispered softly, not wanting to cry anymore or argue anymore. He wasn't trying to be noble when he said he'd wanted to help 'Ros. He was saying it because if 'Ros helped him, then Hiku wanted to return the favor. Things were so odd for the people who had just met that night. The static attraction was evident and it could only have been Fate who drew the two together.

"Music...that's a part of it...but there's another wound...and that is connected with a different sort of feeling..." 'Ros tapped his free hand to his own heart, "...it stems there, and that's the one that needs the most help...they tell me that loving others can fix it, but I wouldn't know...one must be brave enough to do so." It was, in truth, a confession of sorts...that there was something that 'Ros was afraid of. Of course, his past had tained the way he acted and thought...far more than anyone might guess.

"But ... love is the cause of all my pain... it hurts too much..." Hikuzu complained earnestly. It was true, and he knew it. If he hadn't fallen in love with his own brother maybe things would've been different, maybe his little tantrums would've gotten better. But they didn't... and that was the end. Swallowing nervously he noticed the very vague statement of revealing fear and chose to not say anything. If 'Ros wanted to speak of his own past, he would. Hikuzu would not coax it from him for he did not want to put salt in wounds that were not his business. Though... some part of him protested. Some part wanted to make those wounds his business.

'Ros shook his head, "Love is not the cause...it is the placement of that love...simply...find another place for it..." He smiled, and for once it was sad. "I did not...and I regret it to this day." Yes...he'd had a bout of unrequited love in his past, only it had been a bit more serious than simply an obsession with a sibling. No relation in anyway and it had somehow been worse.

"...will you tell me what happened 'Ros?" Hikuzu said softly. He wanted to trust the other, he wanted to hear more so that perhaps he could learn from it. There was so much to learn about love and Hikuzu was already shivering after only touching the surface.

"It is... a rather long tale...but I was young and foolish..." He smiled faintly, "And I allowed myself to be used...it is not at all a pleasant sort of story." The coon shrugged, "I don't think you would like to hear all the messy details..." Trust? It was almost an alien term to him now.

"Alright... so how will I find another place for my love?" Hikuzu said giving up on the subject. If 'Ros wouldn't tell, then Hikuzu wasn't gonna force him.

He smiled, just a ghost of the expression, "That is something that only you can decide...that only you can do...I cannot help you, for I do not govern your emotions. You must seek it, but you must not be...too free about it...or you will end up misplacing that love." Perhaps, later, he might tell the other...all those things that he had so nonchalantly glossed over.

"Misplace..." He muttered and then looked at his soup. "It's cold..." He seemed so far off but it didn't really matter. Turning away from 'Ros he picked up the bowl of soup, brought it into his hands and then to his lap where he began to eat it (with a spoon of course). The other bowl of soup was still on the table, waiting to be eaten.

His eyes never left Hikuzu, and the coon didn't seem to pay all that much attention to the food as he started to eat his soup. If he even tasted it at all, it was a wonder. 'Ros wondered what the younger was thinking at this time and moment...again, that insatiable curiosity.

Hikuzu's thoughts were so vague and dispersed that he himself could not even pinpoint the exactness of them. When he finished the bowl he didn't notice and kept going until finally the coldness of the metal spoon caught him and he set it down. Tearing off a bread roll that came with it he nibbled on that too, with ears slicked back. After he finished he let out a long sigh and leaned back. His mind wasn't making any sense and his head hurt. "Damnit..." He muttered.

He leaned close, almost too close, so near that the other could probably feel his breath. "Hmmm? What troubles you this time, my little troubadour?" 'Ros inquired, one ear flicking curiously, the end of his tail twitching in some unknown emotion.

"There is so much I want to understand... but ... it's too much at once and I just am drowning in it," Hikuzu said softly, not even realizing how close the other was. He knew perhaps but did not actually KNOW. He wasn't an idiot, but he was very confused, no doubts there.

"Don't drown, kiddo..." His hand went to the other's arm, fingers tightening there. "...find yourself something to hold onto until it all sorts itself out in that brain of yours..." Another smile was on his face. "Something...anything."

"...like... you?" Hikuzu said without really understanding his own words. His voice was soft, as if it was no longer part of this world but his eyes were sharper then ever and peered endlessly up at 'Ros. He wanted more then anything to believe it could all fall into place, and somehow... looking at 'Ros... he knew it could if only the other would be around to help.

He froze, going still a moment...well...he was...stable enough...he supposed...and...oooh dear...he kinda had offered, hadn't he? Without realizing it, he had offered, and he dared not withdraw it. "All right then..." He finally said, "Consider me your stability..." Friend...stability...what was the difference? Well, he was going to find out.

"Is that really ... okay...?" Hikuzu said as his eyes unfocused and then refocused completely. He gained control of his thought process as soon as 'Ros had said okay. It was as if.... as if just hearing the other speak rational words was enough. The angelic fox was beyond himself, and could only look up at the other with shock and overwhelming gratefulness.

He smiled then, as he himself became comfortable with the idea, and nodded again. "Yes...yes it is, my little troubadour..." Reaching up, fingertips brushed the other's cheek, "Yes...I know I just said something entirely out of character but let's ignore that for now, shall we?"

Hikuzu blinked and then smiled softly. The other could be affectionate and kind, and the angel-fox had known it all along. He enjoyed seeing this side of the coon and he was grateful the coon enjoyed his company so much that he'd be the one stable thing in his life. The world seemed to balance out around him but all he saw was the coon. "...yes..." He muttered, not having many words to speak.

He inclined his head a moment, auburn locks sweeping forwards, "Good! So now that that is all settled, how about a second course...a warm one this time, my little troubadour?" Yes, he was pressing right along, they could figure out all the tedious little bits and details as the days went by...and he could figure out this most interesting puzzle that was Hikuzu. Not at all a bad deal in his opinion.

Hikuzu nodded and looked towards the counter where Alfi immediately busied himself -which indicated he had been watching them- and called out, "Alfi... bring a menu won't you?"

Alfi did so and held it out, Hikuzu took it and handed it to 'Ros. "Go ahead, still my treat." He gave a smile, not the fake sort but the real kind and it was only for 'Ros. The rest of his body seemed too weak and too dreary to want to move itself.

'Ros raised an eyebrow at Alfi, giving him that disconcerting smirk, that made it look like he knew all there was to know about the person to whom that look was directed. Ears swiveling back towards Hikuzu, 'Ros then glanced down at his menu, behaving himself, casting a smile at the other in return, "I think I'm rather in the mood for something sweet." The coon declared, perusing the menu with the barest hint of curiosity.

"Something hot and sweet..." Hikuzu echoed lightly. "What were you thinking of?" There was slightly laugh to his voice as if he found the whole thing amusing.

Alfi simply waited patiently to take the order, "We have many sweet items here sir."

'Ros nodded, and finally decided on a dessert that involved hot fudge and caramel...that would be hot...and sweet enough to knock the faint-hearted and sugar intolerant over. He said it slowly, and deliberately, and pretended to change his mind about three times...just to annoy their waiter.

Alfi looked rather ticked, but kept the smile and was off with the menu and the order.

For some reason, Hiku found this whole thing very funny. He was beginning to enjoy the difference between how 'Ros treated him and how the coon treated the rest of the world. It would be a greedy fetish he'd come to smile at. "That was cruel 'Ros..." He said laughing.

He shrugged, "They never said I was nice, you know..." 'Ros had a devious look on his face, somehow playful and then again something else entirely. Yes...he acted far differently to Hikuzu than he did to the rest of the poor hapless population.

"No, I guess not... but I could care less what everyone else says about you." That was an odd statement coming from someone as broken and as unstable as Hikuzu was. That golden smile that lit up his face faded slightly as he thought of the implications of what he'd said. He wondered why perhaps he couldn't forgive himself, and why his music was so sour and why everything played out like a bad movie. Why was his life the one being so terribly messed with? It was awful to think of it that way, and yet he couldn't resist. He saw the world as a cold place that music warmed up and he saw himself as the heater. But the heater was broken and 'Ros was trying to fix it ... but all Hikuzu wanted to do was keep the fixer forever. After something is fixed, people forget about it. Hiku didn't want to be forgotten. No... a hit and run wouldn't fly here. Hikuzu would break again and again if he was left alone or left without his stability. Right now the only true thing in his unstable world was the ever stable 'Ros who's soul seemed so beautiful and so patched... gods why was it only him who brought this about? Why was 'Ros the only one? And why had they met on this night? And why... why why why! Things cried out in his head and he lost his sanity for the moment. Sorting through slowly he tried to file away the unanswered things and just look at the thing in front of him. Things would answer themselves in time, but the first and most important thing to be answered was 'how does one forgive themself?'

His smile held tinges of other things...sadness, perhaps something a bit more serious than sheer inquisitivity, and a genuine sort of emotion that might appear disconcerting. "I'm glad that someone is not willing to listen to everyone else...I highly recommend that people form their own opinions...I've lived that way for a very long time...finding out...on my own...and it has served me decently." Had he known the long, and convoluted thoughts of the other, he might have been silent, and simply been left to ponder for hours on end...as he would have been taken aback, and left to search out a reason of his own from those thoughts.

Hikuzu wasn't as jolted back to reality with this statement, so he barely heard it. It only clipped the edge of his mind and clung on for it's life while Hikuzu stood in the middle of a mess and forgot it existed. Finally, he blinked back into the real world with a headache and still without his answers. "Oh 'Ros... why do things have to be this way? Why must I be so unable to forgive? Why have I met you? Why have you become my stability? Why... why..." He drowned himself out of his head as his sentence fell off. His words became inaudible mumbles as he began to loose it. And then he was gone again, delving into his own mind out of sheer loss for anything else. On occassion he'd mutter a rare word, but alas, it would be of no use to understanding his messed up line of thoughts that so tormented him.

He slid closer, putting that arm back around the other's shoulders once again. "Why?" 'Ros chuckled, resting his head against Hikuzu's, auburn and vivid blue intermingling. "That is a pointless question, my little troubadour, and the answers will come on their own...so why ask them?" Yes, that was the way he lived, and wasn't about to change it now.

"...I'm impatient..." It was the obvious answer, said unsarcastically but that was the funny thing about it. It could only be expected to be funny but not serious and yet the solemness on his face and the fact he was so determined to understand made a funny statement sound like a death sentence.

He laughed, "Most people are, but patience is an unwanted but rather needed trait, I am afraid." Deft fingers went again to stroke silken-soft hair. "And may I just mention that...the answers will come soon enough...perhaps sooner than you might think."

Hikuzu found himself loosing to the pool of throughts... but wait, no now he was loosing to that hand. He was so tired suddenly, so ... tired of everything and he closed his eyes and leaned against the other. "Tell me... how do you ... have my answers?" He whispered softly, as if not daring to speak any louder.

"Because...I've been in your place...experience is the hardest and most thorough of teachers..." And his voice was just as quiet, the honesty brutal. "And perhaps...I have yet to survive it..." Though his hold on the other was secure and warm, there was still something cold about him...as though from a part of him that had died someplace...or been frozen.

Through that warm embrace, Hikuzu knew something was off. The statement itself was dreadful. To think that someone as strong and kind as 'Ros had felt these things and been through it, same as him... well that discontented the troubadour.

At that very moment, Alfi came and set down the ordered food and with a single, slightly disgusted glance at the two embracing, he walked off. "...I'm sorry...." He apologized for a reason he did not know.

He stuck his tongue out childishly at Alfi, just because he could, waggling his fingers...before becoming serious once more. "Why apologize? It doesn't matter...that is the past, and once I resolved to look ahead, things got better." With a soft chuckle, he rested his head atop Hikuzu's. "You are the one who needs the fixing, not me..."

Hikuzu, even in his dreamy state, pondered this and sighed. "Perhaps I am unfixable 'Ros. Perhaps I'm a waste of time." He wasn't sure what he was saying, but his physical condition was affecting the words his mind had held in so deep. The words his mind had tried so hard to delve through and solve. It was ...sad.

He rolled his eyes, "Who are you to say that? You haven't really begun to try and solve the puzzle that is the fixing of yourself..." Idly, he twined a strand of electric blue about his finger. "I might be damaged, as might you...but you are not hopeless...Indeed...I think there is plenty of room for improvement."

"You really think so 'Ros?" Hikuzu half opened his eyes and looked at the face of the other. He looked past the glasses and into the eyes behind them with his own red laser-like eyes. His ears flicked back and his wings adjusted slightly. He shifted a little as well, but not enough to affect the way they were sitting.

He nodded, slowly, so that it could not be missed, adjusting his glasses so that he could meet the other's eyes without those between them. "Yes...I do..." His own ears had swiveled to attention, and he smiled faintly, "After all...I'm helping, aren't I?"

"You are..." Hikuzu faded, letting his eyes hold the others a moment more before they gave way and he closed them. "You should eat your dessert before it gets cold..." He whispered.

He blinked, and blinked again, "Oh...right..." With a grin, he detached himself from the other and began to molest his dessert instead. "Dear me...I'm afraid I was distracted..." All said in total innocence, naturally.

Hikuzu was slightly upset to be detached from, but he withstood commenting and leaned back into the chair, curling himself about his knees. "By?" He muttered, nearly inaudibly.

He leaned over and poked the other in what was showing of the angelic fox's ribs. "You...what else is there of interest?" 'Ros showed off a cheeky grin before again taking a larger than the norm bite of his dessert and somehow managing to chew it in a polite fashion.

Hikuzu watched politely, drifting back and forth between sleeping and awake. He winced slightly at the poking, having felt no other appropriate reaction, and was now simply watching. He seemed to be good at that. For a famous musician it was odd he could be so quiet. He muttered something to say he'd heard, and then drifted off into his mind again; eyes closed.

Finally, it seemed he had tired of his food, leaning back and idly blowing a stray hair out of his face. "Well...you're not being much of a conversationalist, my little troubadour..." Without any hint of shame at all, he edged close again, hoping to get an answer. "You're going to get lost in there, you know..."

Hikuzu blinked open his eyes and yawned lightly, ears pressed close to his head and wings adjusted to be no burden to him. "I'm... just tired is all.. just tired..."

"Tired?" He reached up and brushed an ear with his fingertips, "Long day?" He wondered what they would do from here, for surely they would part ways...perhaps meet again on the morrow? That sounded reasonable enough...

"...I suppose." Hikuzu said offhandedly. Moving slightly he reached into a pocket amongst his person, and left a wad of cash on the table between the plate of food and the object itself. His ear twitched ever so slightly and he looked at 'Ros smiling a bit, "It's about time I go home to my boys..." He thought of the twins affectionately, for he felt like their father in the slightest way. He was no replacement for their lost parents, but certainly he could take care of them. Which he did and should do now.

He nodded slowly, "I suppose they'll be expecting you..." Slowly his expression became a strangely mysterious smile, "Will I see you tomorrow?" For he did want to meet the other...tomorrow...and the day after that...indefinitely until he knew everything that there was to know about this strange and ethereal person known as Hikuzu.

"Yes... they shall..." He replied slowly and then he was caught off guard and taken aback at the question. He pondered and mused over it a moment more before nodding; he had no engagements on the 'morrow. "Yes, yes if you'd like I can meet up with you somewhere..."

"I would." Was the prompt response, "Where and when...my schedule is absolutely open and even if it wasn't the damned fools would just have to wait." 'Ros chuckled softly, "All up to you, my little troubadour."

Hikuzu was still shocked by the eagerness of the other and he gave a light smile accompanied with a laugh. However, it was a hollow half-hearted laugh. "Whenever and wherever you want... you could just meet me at my apartment if you want?"

'Ros grinned, and perhaps one should be unsettled as he did so, "Mmm...that sounds just fine...directions, perchance?" Canting head to one side, the faintly bemused expression was back, his thoughts perhaps should not be divined by the faint of heart...or the easily flustered.

Hikuzu paused a moment, "Uhhhh..." Then he fell off laughing. "D'you know the club a ways across town? The rave club? Across that street there's an intersection, down that road and it's the third building on the right. Third floor, apartment 3C." He recited it as if he'd had to tell it a million times. "You can come any time after noon..."

He chuckled once more and inclined his head in the other's direction. "Yes..." It was easy to see that he was mentally filing it all away...perhaps even better than he might have had he pen and paper, for 'Ros's mind was like a vise, and he never forgot anything, or so it might be said.

Hiku nodded, "So... I'll... see you then?" He blinked, wondering if perhaps he'd forgotten something. Maybe he'd never see 'Ros again... maybe... maybe 'Ros ...maybe this was all a bad idea. But no, Hikuzu wouldn't doubt the coon, he couldn't.

"Yes you most assuredly will, my little troubadour..." His voice dropped just slightly, and he leaned in with a roguish wink. "And I expect to find you in a good mood..." And he ennunciated the last few words distinctly, tapping him on the nose with one finger.

Hikuzu stared for a moment and then gave a large grin which contradicted his horrid red eyes. Ears slicked back and wings rustled as he nodded a yes and then stood up and took a step back... "So tomorrow..." He muttered in a disbelieving way.

"Yes. Tomorrow." His voice was firm and as he stood, his own eyes met Hikuzu's. The coon fully intended to show up...just after noon the next day, and come snow or hellfire, he planned to be there. Yes...yes he was that curious...and he would act upon it.

"Alright then..." Hikuzu felt like he should say something else, but there was nothing to be said and with that he turned and walked away. It was hard to not look back.

Next day...

'Ros had spent the entire morning...not fretting, but simply restless, which was odd for him, and Saryn had poked him with a needle repeatedly, since the coon was making a nuisance of himself. Needless to say, 'Ros made his way...following the directions that the angelic fox had given him, and arrived at the door promptly at 12:01....and knocked at the door, a smile on his face.

It would so happen, he'd managed to send the twins off on this fine day, persuading them to go visit his parents at Zaner's house. In the meantime, he'd busied himself with bustling around his apartment and trying to not focus on the clocks. He was big on clocks however, mainly because he always needed to know exactly what time it was. He may have been signed up with a company, but he didn't bring in enough just yet. And so when the knock to his door came at such a prompt time, he was taken aback and fell off his kitchen chair; he had leaned too far back. Massaging the place where his wing met his back, he set it right and went to open the door. With a similar smile he looked upon the face of 'Ros, ever so grateful the other had even come, "...Hi."

He grinned, that smile widening, "Hello, my little troubadour...you're not too enthusiastic...didn't expect me?" 'Ros canted head to one side, keeping eyes fixed on crimson. The coon...he'd been paying attention to time all morning...grand attention...a keen interest in showing up at Hikuzu's doorstep.

"What?" He snapped to and then blinked, "Oh gosh no! I'm really very very happy to see you 'Ros!" Hikuzu opened his door and stepped back, "Do you want to come in?" His golden ears swished and his blue hair was tied back. He wore a different outfit today which consisted of a choker necklace, a fuzzy collar vest, fishnet gloves and cargo capris. His golden left fox ear was pierced with an earring and his red eyes sparkled with the day's light at his back.

He nodded, "I do indeed, I did come here to see you, after all, and if I just came, took a gander and left, that would be so dreadfully boring, don't you think?" With a chuckle, he walked past the other, nodding to him. The coon was wearing a turtleneck sweater today...thin, but with a multi-colored green weave, which gave an odd, but not unpleasant tint to his eyes, that and a pair of jeans...the coon was apparently going casual, albeit nice casual.

Hikuzu, already enjoying the others company, closed the door and turned to face his guest. Crimson eyes examined the outfit and he smiled lightly, "Yes, yes too boring."

Hikuzu's apartment wasn't very large but it had more then two rooms. Off from a very white and barely furnished living room was a modernized kitchen and a hallway which led to a bathroom and three bedrooms, one being Hikuzus, one being the twins and the last being a spare. "Do you want something to drink?" He asked politely, trying to find a topic.

He laughed, a touchable, rippling sort of sound. "Mmm..." Golden gaze seemed to survey the apartment...slowly, taking his time...absorbing every detail there was to sense. "A drink would be nice..." He finally answered, eyes pulling back to Hikuzu with no little enthusiasm. This place wasn't quite as he'd imagined it might be, and of course, the coon had a most vivid imagination.

Hikuzu suddenly felt self-conscience of his drab home with it's white walls and plain so and so. The couch was a normal couch, the coffee table a normal coffee table and even the TV was nothing extrodinary. Only in one corner of the room was his ever famous guitar hooked up to an amp and such, and even then it was the most amazing thing in the main room. The kitchen was filled with metal appliances and was nicely done, much nicer then the living room. Blinking away his uneasiness with a sickly sweet smile he trudged into the kitchen and grabbed a glass from the shelf. "Water? Soda? Wine? Beer? Juice? Tea? Any other sort of liquid?" Hikuzu gave a list, laughing as he did so.

But in reality, 'Ros did not think the place at all boring, for he found within it clues to his puzzle...and always his inquisitive mind searched out more hints to what Hikuzu was like. Placing a hand on his shoulder, the coon dared to lean past the angelic fox, so that he might grin at him from a most peculiar angle. "You have all that? My what a collection..." But it was light and jesting, just teasing the other in the same sort of way...eventually knowing he'd draw the other out of his shell entirely...even if it took years.

Hikuzu's crimson eyes sparkled with the hidden shadows of his heart and the warmth of having the other nearby. His wings flexed and rustled their metallic feathers and his ears prickled back against his head, "I have whatever you want..." It was a delicate sentence, trying to prove that Hikuzu would do anything just to keep this person near. This person was his sanity, was his stability and was the only thing he had that wouldn't go away. He was positive if he lost everything but his life, that he'd never loose 'Ros. The coon was his friend, and Hikuzu valued that more then anything, despite their extremely shortterm relationship.

He chuckled and nodded, the motion felt against the other's shoulder. "Milk then..." Yes...he was strange like that...and often craved milk. It was yet another personal quirk of his. And it was ironic, but no...Hikuzu wasn't going to lose 'Ros, because 'Ros was just persistent...persistent and more than a little bit stubborn. A finger reached out and brushed those strange wings, wanting to see if they were really as metallic as their shimmering hinted at...and how on earth a person could be born with such a thing.

Hikuzu shuddered as the finger touched his metal appendages. They were definately real, no matter how odd that would be. Reluctantly he shuffled away from the other to pour him a glass of milk. Having done so he held it out to 'Ros smiling gently, "Here..." His ears flicked forward curiously, he didn't think 'Ros was one for milk.

He took it, nodding his thanks, and gently sipped it. Yes, 'Ros like milk...he also liked wine...but that was another story entirely. "Thank you...so...pray tell, my little troubadour...what is it that you do in this place other than work on your music?" The coon's eyes were attentively watching the angelic fox's face, strangely entranced for a reason unknown to perhaps even himself.

Blinking Hikuzu fiddled with his ponytail of electric blue hair, "I live here?" He didn't know exactly what was expected of him so he fidgeted nervously. What was he to say? This was his house, he lived here. He wrote music here. That was all.

He laughed, a truly mirth-filled sort of sound. "That you do..." Leaning in closer still, he tilted his head ever so slightly, "And what does that life consist of, Hikuzu?" The coon was so close, that the other could probably sense him in every way...from 'Ros's warm breath, to the way the eccentric male smelled of cloves and cinnamon...just a light fragrance that somehow suited him, and he meant to be that close, as though he needed to be.

Hikuzu had, for the third time since their introduction, froze in 'Ros' prescence. The other was astounding and alluring and the angelic fox was loosing himself in the smell of the others. His tail flickered and he leaned closer unintentionally, "...my life.... is concerned with the twins and with side jobs. I..." He couldn't think straight, the other's golden eyes were distracting him, calling him. All at once he found himself putting his lips gently on the others and then with a sudden grasp of reality he pulled back, taking three steps away. Face bright red and staring at the floor, he said nothing and muttered only apologies.

'Ros had hardly been listening, fixated entirely...golden meeting crimson almost spellbound. And when the other had done that, for a moment he'd forgotten his purpose entirely...and then...when he pulled back, the Coon found himself at a loss...missing the contact, fingertips brushing his own lips, and wishing that that phantom touch had lingered. Reaching out, he seized the other's wrist as he stepped forward...pulling him in, the other hand tilted Hikuzu's face upwards, and the auburn-haired male kissed the musician again...ever so gentle, but letting it linger.

"What're you---" Hikuzu couldn't finish his second. His momentary relapse and backwards step was all in vain as 'Ros came, took him by the wrist and pressed lips to his own. His crimson eyes widened and he felt tied down with confusion. Then after the first almost painful seconds he realized he didn't mind so much and took it willingly. Why was this not wrong? They were friends, this should be wrong. Yet it was not. Hikuzu didn't understand and he didn't try to. It was alright now and that's all that matter. Later could be dealt with... well... later.

'Ros of course, knew what he was doing, at least to some extent...for though the other was...intoxicating to his senses, a beauty about the angelic fox that transcended the physical, the coon knew that some facade of control had to be maintained. But even that was slipping. Hand slipped from wrist and instead wrapped around waist...just a moment before lips parted, and breath was taken in by way of a satisfied sigh. "That's the way it's supposed to be done, my little troubadour..." He said quietly, a smile on his lips.

Hikuzu breathed deeply, taking in the other's own scent and using the oppurtunity to gain his mind back. It had dwindled and given up at the touch of 'Ros and slowly his eyes adjusted to look at the other with a sweet admiration. The arm about his waist was a comfort and the quiet statement was almost laughable. Trying to find words his mouth opened and closed and then finally he whispered, "Oh?"

"Mmmhmm...but it could be better..." With a wink, he simply erased all possible explanations in his mind as to WHY he should NOT be doing this...and very easily let velvet lips meet lips once more. This close, it was hard not to forget everything else entirely...he wanted to lose himself in Hikuzu, and perhaps they would both be able to give one another something in return.

"Better?" He managed to breath out before his mouth was claimed once more. Without even realizing it he let bare arms wrap around the coon's neck, his chained wrist band twinkling jovially. The musician was finding it hard to understand what was going on, or why it was this way... all he knew was they were going somewhere they couldn't come back from. It should've bothered him, but it did not. This near stranger was kissing him, was his stability and was something Hikuzu had wanted his whole life: he was a friend. Eyes closed and will gone he became submissive to the other's will. It was all so easy when pain was everywhere but in the one thing you focused on.

His free hand ghosted up the other's arm...then neck...just fingertips in an exploratory caress. Yes...yes...this could be a beautiful thing...something that he had not predicted...but that could help to heal some of the wounds in them both perhaps. Besides...he thought rather wickedly, it would be a great deal of fun as well. Yes...he wanted Hikuzu...and as more than just a puzzle to figure out...but thoughts were evaporating, and becoming a desire.

(Continued...)

Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 7:45 pm

What comes next is not appropriate for the forum... so we'll move on to a few weeks from now. Three weeks after their little escapade.

'Ros had come over a lot after that day, and Hikuzu had openly welcomed him. No matter if he had a gig that night, or if he was busy, the coon was always around and always invited. Things always looked brighter when the other came to visit and slowly patches of himself began to heal but it was still not enough. After that first time, 'Ros had shared Hikuzu's bed once or twice more and now the consequences were making themselves visible. It was inevitably the time when the troubadour needed to call in 'Ros to talk to him. Nervously he sat at his kitchen bar like he had so many weeks ago, jittering about what he'd have to do. Eyes kept glancing at the clock, it was almost time. "Oh god... oh god I can't believe this..."

And 'Ros was precisely on time...always punctual as he had been on that very first day. Save this time, he actually opened the door without the formality of a knock, waltzing his way in and not even going so far as to announce himself. "Hikuzu!" He called the other's name with the usual sort of self-contained enthusiasm...as he did look forward to these visits, not about to lie to himself and say that they did not make the highlight of each day that they were given. Making his way towards the kitchen, since the musician wasn't awaiting him closer to the door, he wondered just what his current fascination had been up to of late.

"Thank god..." He muttered under his breath, afraid he was going to break down into tears any moment. The news he had today was enough to make him nearly revert to his nervous broken self, the way he had been before even meeting the coon. Scrambling over to the other and flinging himself at 'Ros in a warm embrace he greeted him, "You're here..." He sounded as if today, of all days, he didn't think the other would show. "Thank goodness. I've been waiting... I have... to talk to you." He sounded nervous and looked even worse. His gorgeous electric blue hair was disheveled and he wore his pajama's still, as if he hadn't had the effort to do anything all morning but fret about.

That was instinctively 'Ros's cue to get a bit edgy. Hikuzu looked as though he'd been terribly upset for a good while, and that made the coon nervous too. "Oh?" It was with a grand array of emotions that he considered just what the other had to talk to him about. With some irritation and a bit of panic, he wondered if the other might have decided that he couldn't see him anymore, but with the way a pair of arms were currently latched about his neck, he logically discarded that one. Had someone hurt the singer? 'Ros's ire rose a bit with the very notion...what else could it be? Despite this, fingers soothingly brushed the tangles from bright tresses, "What is it, my little troubadour? " His voice was low, also meant to calm, in tandem with those touches.

What could he say? How could he say it? He bit his lower lip and nuzzled himself into the other, still extremely nervous and upset. He knew he was probably freaking 'Ros out and he was dreadfully guilty and ashamed because of it, but still... this was going to turn everything upside down. "...'Ros... I found out last night... oh god..." His voice was soft and muffled and he pulled away slightly to show his bloodshot teary crimson eyes to the other, "I'm pregnant."

Blank was a very good word to describe 'Ros at the moment, as for an infinite moment he could do little but stare and blink...an almost comical combination of the two if the moment itself had not been so serious. Fingers drifted tenatively to green-tinted glasses and he lowered them a bit, so that amber could meet red. "Pregnant?" His voice was surprisingly clear for someone who had just been told he was a father...and finally, a small, strangely satisfied smile came across his lips. "My my..."

This blatently shocked Hikuzu. He'd expected something ... not so calm. He'd expected ... but now he couldn't remember because his red eyes locked with the coon's and in a destressed manner he fidgeted. Arms didn't loosen themselves from the other, because it was obvious that the musician was terrified of letting go. Perhaps a part of him thought if he let go 'Ros would walk away and never come back. Ears flicked back and the held-back tears fell. Finally he choked out words, "'Ros... say something else... please... tell me you aren't angry, tell me you won't leave... please for God's sake..." It was clearer now as to why he was distraught, but even clearer was that there was no reason to be. It was needless panic and hormones that were raging war in his body. Hikuzu was up for some rough times and this was the beginning to a huge problem.

A low, rich chuckle escaped his lips, "I'm not angry, my little troubadour..." He assured, fingers graduating from hair to an ear that was pressed against those same locks. "...and why would I leave? The children you bear are mine, after all, and I daresay I would be a sorry excuse for a person if I so dreadfully neglected something that was a part of me, would I not?" Faintly accented voice almost sounded amused....but at the same time he was trying to tell the other that he had not intention of leaving the other alone...and pregnant no less.

Hikuzu choked down words and again buried himself against the other. He didn't know why he was crying, or why he was nervous or upset but those words comforted him. The question was one he couldn't reply to, for he didn't know how. Somehow he'd get through this and with 'Ros by his side he honestly believed he could. But gods, what would he tell his family? What about his career? This was a very delicate matter and had to be handled with care. He was pregnant with his best and only FRIEND's children. His musical career was probably done for and his parent's would be upset that he was pregnant but not in love so basically his only comfort was the father of the children. After a bit more he consoled himself and spoke lightly, still not letting go, "What'll we do now? What can we do? I'm so sorry... I've probably ruined your life now... and mine too. The music companies and my family... what'll they say..." He was pretty much talking to himself for the second half of his words and his newly child-coping body was making him distort everything. Clearly he was going to have a problem by himself.

"Shhhhhhhh...it's all right..." He assured, as though by speaking the words he could magically make it so. "You have by no means done anything to me other than make my life a bit more interesting..." His smile contained traces of that ever-present smirk, "And that I can always do with more of..." Canting head to one side, so that auburn locks slid to obscure one golden eye, he continued to watch the other. "As for you, my little troubadour...we shall take it as it comes, and I shall be with you to help place every step..." Slowly, he lowered his lips to meet the other's... "My lovely Hikuzu...your life might be unbalanced, but I assure you that there shall be no breaking, for I will not allow it."

At first it was hard to kiss the other, hard to accept what he'd done and harder yet to understand it all. Then it became suddenly easier and he kissed back longingly. This amazing man would never leave his side and would always help him and for that he was eternally grateful. After all, he was bearing the other's kid/kids and he deserved help for that. "'Ros, you mean so much to me... thank you. I'm so glad that I have you to help me... really I am." Hikuzu's words were cheesy, but they were sincere and right now the other was his comfort. They'd get through this together and perhaps find out a bit more about themselves and even patch more shattered pieces into the puzzle. It seemed silly that just a month ago he'd been ready to die because his brother didn't return his feelings and now, he was latched to a gorgeous coon who had impregnated him. Oh what a mysterious web of life!

He shook his head, "Thanking me for helping you with a pickle I got you into in the first place? My my..." But that smile was still there, somehow, and yes, he seemed more bemused by it all than anything else. Oh yes...children...children that were his and Hikuzu's...Hikuzu being one of the few people he could tolerate for long periods of time...oh the situation could most definitely have been worse...far worse...Actually, he was pleased. He had not asked for offspring, but here they were practically dropped in his lap...and any combination of the singer and his own genes was bound to be a gorgeous creation...so all in all...yes...it was satisfactory.

Crimson eyes bored into the other, wondering if it was really okay. It had to be because the other was smiling and his words sounded true and if anyone knew anything about sound it was Hikuzu. Quickly he composed himself and tried to smile back, "You are the first I've told... I don't really know what we should do now but I think maybe... I want to wait before telling anyone else..."

He slowly nodded his understanding. That made sense...it would be a while before...there were truly any visible effects, after all...but soon enough...and the thought rather amused him. "I understand...there's no one I really care to tell, at any rate...the one important person knows..." And he winked one golden eye, indicating Hikuzu. Yes...indeed...he and Hikuzu knew, and that was really all that mattered to him. 'Ros wasn't thinking in terms of family, as that was incomprehensible to him at this point in time, but it was certainly...something a bit more close-knit than friends with privileges.

Hikuzu had to smile at that, and he felt his cheeks flush with a bit of pink. It someone made him feel light to be so important to 'Ros that the other had no one else to tell. Needless to say he felt special and singled out and of all the people he worked for and all his fangirls and friends and family, none of them gave the musician this sort of driving joy. "Mmm I'm happy... so very happy." However, the underlying question still went unanswered: what now?

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Posted: Fri Nov 24, 2006 9:20 pm

Five monthes later...

It had been hard to hide the truth from the twins, who were growing up and maturing before his very crimson eyes. Thick locks were always tied back these days and he was rounding nicely. His excuse was that he was getting fat and he realized the twins were perhaps too skeptical about this fake story. However, he still didn't want to tell them. Not yet. In fact, today was their lucky day, for as soon as he returned from visiting his own parents he was going to tell them. It seemed nearly impossible to do much of anything anymore and the record company, although highly baffled at the apparent pregnancy of their male rock star, had given him traditional leave from the business for a while. Media followed him everywhere and so he rarely left without 'Ros and a disguise. He had only been small talk heading for the big charts, but after he became pregnant the whole world wanted to see him.

He found it annoying to say the least. It wasn't fun being this way. Long ago he'd had terrible morning sickness and now he was swollen and hungry a lot. Supposedly it was better then his voice, which, for some reason, was shot. He couldn't seem to sing as beautifully as he had before. His harmonic angel voice was dying and he seemed to feel like Heaven was taking out it's rage upon him. No matter. It was almost time to head out and he had to do it quietly so that the boy's wouldn't hear him. Leaving a note on the kitchen bar counter, he shuffled out the door, one hand on his stomach protectively.

He felt it would be best to wait for the coon outside the apartment today. Leaning against the door heavily he double checked his outfit mentally. Hair tied back and tucked under a poofy brown hat that covered his ears as well. Gorgeous blood red eyes were hidden behind small black shades and his bulging stomach was covered by a sensible beige turtleneck sleeveless sweater. He wore large baggy cargo trousers and comfortable shoes (mainly because he couldn't bear to wear much of anything else). They'd have to go out through the back and take an actual car to his parent's house because walking was no longer an option and being seen wouldn't be pleasant. With a sigh he checked the black watch on his right wrist, it having replaced the arm band, was his only source of solace for now.

Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 2:52 pm

And on the other hand, there was 'Ros, who took the entire thing on a much lighter note. He, after all, did not have to live with the ever-constant reminder that was a changing and complaining body, as Hikuzu did. But the coon was in fact rather doting...as doting as 'Ros could be, at any rate. Protective and posessive to the extreme he had more than encouraged the singer to hide from his public...the coon had also designated himself unofficial bodyguard and had demonstrated his willingness to knock heads together more than once.

Poor Hikuzu...it seemed that 'Ros was actually having a great deal of fun over the state of his little troubadour.

But at least it had seemed that the father of the singer's children had an almost eager willingness to ferry Hikuzu wherever he wanted to go, and it was soon rather obvious that the coon not only had a great deal of time on his hands, but apparently had an income coming from somewhere...of course, the answer was absurdly simple, but the golden-eyed male was not about to divulge it just yet, for he did love secrets, and the good ones were even better than the bad ones.

Parking the car, which was a jade green Mustang that had garnered nearly five years of age since its purchase, he strode with his usual energy up to where Hikuzu was waiting for him.

.Sephiros Immortal.

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Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 3:22 pm

The troubadour heard his children's father before he even laid crimson eyes upon him. Quickly, with a semi-nervous jolt to his step and an anxiety to his face he went to meet the other half-way. Perhaps there was a bit of meaning behind it but all Hikuzu wanted was to see the other. Somewhere in 'Ros, Hikuzu found extreme comfort and reassurance. It was a shoulder to lean on and a shield from the storm. It was all he had and all he felt safe with.

Finally he saw him and a smile that lit up his entire face came over him. "'Ros!" He called cheerfully. His emotions were a delicate thing these days but usually just seeing the coon made things easier to bear. Happiness overwhelmed him and stopped when he had reached the other. He knew he looked pretty odd, bulging stomach and hair tucked away but the metallic appendages on his back were still visible and his tail still flickered behind him. However, none of this mattered because they were friends. True friends.

The impact of those words rattled the musician's mind and he longed to write a song when he could. For now, the task at hand. His smile grew a bit sadder and that previous nervousness leaked into it. Hormones could not decide on what to release and what to amplify. Body raging and children sucking off his nutrients like parasites, he was still that troubadour from behind the club all those monthes ago.

Posted: Sat Nov 25, 2006 11:40 pm

Of course, were some poor fellow to be watching them, their greeting would not seem like one that was of the sort that two who were simply best of friends would give, for 'Ros, in all that need to reclaim in commonplace gesture what was his, slid an arm around Hikuzu's ever-expanding waist as the other drew near, and placed a kiss on his lips.

"Hello, my little troubadour...you're looking well today...if not a little stressed. Don't fret overmuch, after all..." The coon winked, "I'm with you, you know." As though that could solve any and all problems and wash away all insecurities...he knew it was not the case, but he liked to pretend. 'Ros was very VERY good at pretending.

A dual-colored tail brushed Hikuzu's legs as a wordless sort of comfort...strange little habitual motions that he now did without thinking. 'Ros had become almost...warmer with the musician...ever so slightly, the gradual sort of increase that comes with time...like the wearing away of rock by the passage of water.

But looking almost professional today in slacks and a sweater that most certainly carried a popular brand-name, it was clear that he was trying to impress just a wee bit. Ever the show-off.

.Sephiros Immortal.

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Posted: Sun Nov 26, 2006 9:47 am

In the first few monthes he would've blushed at the gesture, nervous because he had learned friends didn't do these things normally. However, now he brushed Society's rules aside and did what made him happiest. Being with 'Ros hid the emptiness in his heart and he was greatful to have a mask that was almost real. He was greatful that the other had said he'd never leave. It brightened him and warmed him from the inside out so that this time there was no blush, only a warming under his skin. Returning the kiss gently and lightly, as though not in the mood to do much else, he continued beaming at 'Ros, "I know. I'll be alright with you around... I'm just worried about what they'll say. I'm sure my mother will be excited but I'm not so sure about my father."

Metallic wings twitched lightly at the touching caress of the tail and his body seemed to gradually untense itself. It was rather like a coiled cat ready to spring suddenly realizing how comfortable it was by the warm fire. Naturally, it would uncoil, stretch a bit and then curl up in a more comforting position. Beneath the hat he knew his ears were twitching. Without moving his body his eyes slid down the other, examining the outfit his friend had chosen. It made him laugh a little. 'Ros always looked nice and presentable and it made Hikuzu chuckle for he knew his parents would find no flaw with his looks.

It was only when the coon started to become more open and warmer with the musician that he realized what he'd been like before. It also caused the angelic-fox to realize how weak and open he'd always been. It was sort of like an unequal trade and he had a feeling someday he'd come to regret that trade. He'd come to be angry with himself for opening so much to this man when the other could not open that much for him. But was he truly open? No he supposed not. Fear prevented it. Fear clenched his heart and shortened his breath some nights, however he could act just as well as 'Ros and he knew a smile and words and tears that were true were the things that broke through his barrier and reached the coon. It would always be that way, but he had to wonder how long it would take before the barrier broke. Or maybe, what broke first? The barrier, or himself? Maybe neither, maybe they'd be this way forever. Never letting each other in or letting each other truly help. Whoever knew the answer was certainly keen on not telling.

Posted: Sun Nov 26, 2006 12:49 pm

The coon could but nod in understanding. He'd have to tell his own parents eventually...naturally, as he couldn't very well explain children appearing magically. But they didn't know anything he didn't wish them to know and the redhead found a devilish sort of delight in not revealing information until he wished it.

Besides...he really didn't want to be forced into attending any more baby showers than were necessary...and heaven forbid should his mother try to furnish them with an entire nursery set. Oh, and of course, there would be the lecture by his father and...ah...why was he even thinking about this? He wasn't going to tell them, and that was that.

"I understand. But I'm sure it will go well..." That arm was still about the angelic fox's waist as 'Ros took a step back and to the side, careful of the shimmering wings that the other posessed. "Now I left the car running, so let us depart...as it would be frightfully tedious if I had to purchase another car because someone had swiped it in my absence."

He seemed to take things lightly, indeed, life itself, but that was rather far from the case...there were things he took seriously, and there was quite a bit of fretting being done as far as Hikuzu went...the lovely singer was a rather vital part of the coon's life, but he'd never ever say that...never go so far as to say that he, in fact, cared anything for him...because he was afraid...afraid to drown all over again, and those walls were still too strong.

.Sephiros Immortal.

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Posted: Sun Nov 26, 2006 3:07 pm

The world seem to blur about the edges and he tucked his wings closer to him so that they were as small as possible. He'd gotten used to hiding them for of course one had to do such a thing when they had such large and horrid metallic appendages on one's back. He had to wonder if the world was conspiring against him and 'Ros, if maybe perhaps there was something that would keep him and the coon seperated forever. The musician sighed, not wanting to dwell on it.

Finally they made it to the coons car, which needless to say, was in one piece and perfectly mobile. Hikuzu let out a smile, "Look see, your car's fine." He just had to comment because to him it was rather funny and it made light conversation. Topics these days were so harsh and serious and Hikuzu really didn't like dealing with them. He would rather concentrate on the thing's at hand because somehow they were easier to cope with.

Posted: Sun Nov 26, 2006 7:28 pm

"My dear little troubadour, I was just supposing, as one needs to consider the risks one takes..." Something that 'Ros had probably done too much of lately. He was seen as a daring fellow...devil-may-care and all that, but in truth it was as far from reality as one could possibly imagine.

With a grin that seemed to tease without effort, the coon went around and opened the door to the passenger side, "Let me get that for you, you might break a fingernail." But somehow, the wink that went along with the words went a long way towards taking the mockery from it. That was just the way that 'Ros was, after all.

He saw the other as nothing but beautiful...a fragile porcelain doll that mishandling might break...and it seemed that now that children were on the way he was actually fearful of such an end...that the gorgeous man that he was obsessed with might shatter completely.

And the coon really was unsure what he would do if such a thing happened.

.Sephiros Immortal.

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Posted: Sun Nov 26, 2006 7:41 pm

Somehow that was a slash at the singer's pride and he knew not what to say except smile back in a retort of the mocking smile. "I'm sure I'll be fine. I'm not so fragile that I'll break opening a door 'Ros, so don't give me that look." Of course, the angelic-fox was joking with his words but he took the gesture kindly and got into the car. It hadn't taken him too long to figure out how to situate himself in a car, the main problem was his wings which he managed with a minor bit of shuffling and a lot of tucking them close to his body. Cold metal made him slightly shiver, but he took it all in good time.

Sometimes it passed his mind to consider what the other was thinking, or what would happen after he had the children. 'Ros had said he wouldn't leave... but promises are easily broken and words are not binding enough. Once Hikuzu had thought making love would've been binding, but after he'd shared the experience with one he called a friend, he was not so sure where he stood. The world seemed to crack around him and the only thing unbroken was the ground that 'Ros stood on and so he was forced to stand there too.

He wanted to though. Make no mistake. He enjoyed every single second he had with the gorgeous man. Perhaps it was an infatuation running deeper then friendship but he was too afraid to admit it. He wouldn't allow it to be anything more for fear of the pain it could cause. This in itself was enough pain to bear, and he didn't need anymore. Today however, today he was positive there would be something to deal with and he was already preparing a barrier to lock himself away from the world.

Posted: Mon Nov 27, 2006 1:25 am

He knew, of course, what he'd done, but hadn't the true decency to be consciously sorry for it, so instead, he planted a kiss on the other's nose, smiled at the father of his children, and like the gentleman he was not, shut the door for him once he'd seen that the angelic fox was comfortably situated.

Ah...if only Hikuzu knew about the ever-strengthening ties that he had, with each word and gesture, laced about 'Ros's very soul and looped in pretty little ribbons that disguised the knots beneath them. They had been easy to shrug off at first...looking so thin that they'd break with the merest shrug...and that's why the coon had let them stay. But now...now he would truly have to fight with them in order to wrest free of the musician's clutches...a hold that he was sure the singer did not know he posessed. But it didn't matter. Because as long as power was never exerted over him, 'Ros was content the way things were, or so he told himself, and so, he held the whole situation in a peculiar sort of apathy.

Moving around to his side of the vehicle, he slid in with that strange, ever-present grace and habitually pulling on his seatbelt, he put the car into gear and backed out...pulling away from the apartments and onto the road itself. Hikuzu had given him directions earlier in the day, and like the odd sort of person he was, 'Ros had written them down and taped them on a post-it note to the middle of the steering wheel.

So it was no small wonder that they got there in a timely fashion, 'Ros droning on his his accented voice about something or another, only pausing once or twice to see if his 'friend' had anything to say...he had noticed the sort of...shutting down that Hikuzu was attempting, as he understood all too well...those barriers, and was somehow content in knowing that the one the singer erected was only temporary.

It wasn't until he pulled onto the last street that he said anything of import, and that was to warn Hikuzu to point out the place...as he'd so dreadfully hate to miss it.

.Sephiros Immortal.

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Teh Zan
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Posted: Mon Nov 27, 2006 7:04 pm

It was with a gleaming eye and a face contorted behind a mask that he pointed out the house. It was as he'd remembered it. Zaner's house had always been that way. Large estate with a white boarded purple roofed house. Beautiful. Perhaps more beautiful then the coon, or more beautiful then how the coon thought of him, it couldn't really be said. But either way, it was home and as the car pulled up to the house and stopped he didn't wait for 'Ros before he got out of the car.

"...well I'm back..." He whispered mainly for his own benefit. It was troublesome to believe what he'd have to do and he walked around the front of the car with a hand on his stomach, as if he was nervous. He took off his hat and let his gorgeous blue locks fall loosely about him, golden ears twitching in the sunlight. He looked to 'Ros and then to the front door with his father was already waiting. It somehow made him smile. "Dad.." He whispered again.

There he stood. Glancing at his son, outfit far different then his usual attire. His golden hair whipped in the wind, short as always and he wore a grin and waved. "I didn't expect you today Hiku! Your mother will be surprised!" He of course knew where his mate was and where his other son was. He always knew for he was always alert of his family. The world was like a notebook and he had notes on anything necessary to live.

He didn't seem to be such a horrible man, standing there clad in a loose dark green shirt that was unbuttoned on the front. His usual acoutrements of chain necklaces and arm bands were there, as well as his blue jeans that hid socks. It was a habit of his to not wear shoes in the house. Then he noticed the car, and noticed another person. "Who's your friend?" His eyes darkened slightly, trying to understand the situation.

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