It's the bad times all over again...
I thought I had rid myself of these demons, these desires... I gave them up for you... for us... I fought back against these emotions, suppressed the darkness I am bound to, relinquished my addiction and my comfort.
And now there is no us...
And in a flash the want has returned... that painful desire creeps along my skin... I want that sweet release... the physical pain to wash away the hurt in my heart and fill the hollow place that was once my soul.
But I have found something different to place my faith in, something more then us, the greatest gift I never deserved... My daughter, your daughter, Our Daughter. A light in my life that hasn't had a chance to be tarnished, a piece of you no one will ever take away from me.
She is someone who needs me, and will never walk away from me. Someone I have the power to make happy, like I never was able to with you. For whatever reason, I was not good enough for you. I don't blame anyone for that, its no one's fault, but I am, can be, and will be good enough for her.
Thats all I have left to believe in.
I believed in forever, and you ripped that away from me.
I believed in our love, and you proved that to be a lie.
I believed in you, and you betrayed me.
I believed in forgiveness, and you threw it back in my face.
I believed you could stand up to the choices you made, and you proved me a fool.
You claim to be a man, yet you run and hide like a boy. You make a decision, and can't accept the sacrifices that are demanded of that choice. You've rolled over and given up, walked away from me, and the past four years we've shared, for a feeling you don't even know can ever be returned.
You want love, I gave you love, I gave you everything I am, body, heart, and soul... but you don't want me. You've never wanted me. But you wouldn't just let me go. You used me,you used my body, my love and my devotion. I was willing to give you the time and space you needed... I was willing to bite my tounge and let you find you. Swallow my own hurt and inadiquate feelings, and hope that you returned to me.
But you've never wanted to return to my arms, just my bed.
I thought I had rid myself of these demons, these desires... I gave them up for you... for us... I fought back against these emotions, suppressed the darkness I am bound to, relinquished my addiction and my comfort.
And now there is no us...
And in a flash the want has returned... that painful desire creeps along my skin... I want that sweet release... the physical pain to wash away the hurt in my heart and fill the hollow place that was once my soul.
But I have found something different to place my faith in, something more then us, the greatest gift I never deserved... My daughter, your daughter, Our Daughter. A light in my life that hasn't had a chance to be tarnished, a piece of you no one will ever take away from me.
She is someone who needs me, and will never walk away from me. Someone I have the power to make happy, like I never was able to with you. For whatever reason, I was not good enough for you. I don't blame anyone for that, its no one's fault, but I am, can be, and will be good enough for her.
Thats all I have left to believe in.
I believed in forever, and you ripped that away from me.
I believed in our love, and you proved that to be a lie.
I believed in you, and you betrayed me.
I believed in forgiveness, and you threw it back in my face.
I believed you could stand up to the choices you made, and you proved me a fool.
You claim to be a man, yet you run and hide like a boy. You make a decision, and can't accept the sacrifices that are demanded of that choice. You've rolled over and given up, walked away from me, and the past four years we've shared, for a feeling you don't even know can ever be returned.
You want love, I gave you love, I gave you everything I am, body, heart, and soul... but you don't want me. You've never wanted me. But you wouldn't just let me go. You used me,you used my body, my love and my devotion. I was willing to give you the time and space you needed... I was willing to bite my tounge and let you find you. Swallow my own hurt and inadiquate feelings, and hope that you returned to me.
But you've never wanted to return to my arms, just my bed.
