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 Posted: Tue Oct 17, 2006 7:51 pm
 ॐ
Well, I'm not exactly alone. There are the Whispers, but they don't exactly listen to you. And there are these hitodama guys floating around. They're pretty cute.
I know! I have a friend who has a Gwee! I could probably convince him to die and bring his Gwee with him here. That would be great! Then we could set the skeletal forests on fire for fun! Hyu~हुं地蔵菩薩
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Posted: Thu Oct 19, 2006 6:40 pm
What is this thread? A long sigh into nothing? Just post whats on ones mind like a communal blog?
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Posted: Thu Oct 19, 2006 9:24 pm
 ★★★ A Communal Blog! That's brilliant! This could
be The Whispers mentioned in the first post!  ★★★ 
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 3:26 pm
My Whisperings:
Persons can be frustrating and ignorant, but the more I try, the more I'm convinced that people are stupid and ignorant. A person you can edjucate but people seem irrepairably ignorant. You could spend several lifetimes educating everyone and within one generation the arrogant stupidity would return.
The ignorance that I speak of is not only general bigotry and such and unwillingness to change secured perceptions but also a specific idiocy. The belief that what is was been, will be, and is the best there is. It is possible that this is due to mankind's mortality but that is no true excuse. Even those who think beyond their lifes don't consider those who don't and assume there is something wrong with those people instead of seeing their own unique views.
That's my little humanity whisper.
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 5:12 pm
It doesn't have to be profound or pertaining to the guild in order to post it in here, yeah?
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 6:38 pm
★★★ That's correct. It can be as profound or
shallow or silly or irrational as you need it to be.★★★
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 7:20 pm
Hmm...my whisper says...
That people are ignorant and stupid. Much are very conceited, they never see past themselves.
It makes me so angry.
Like those kids in my school who think they're so cool trying to diss EVERYONE.
People just take things for granted so easily. Although I do that all the time, so why am I talking?
Nyeh, I guess I need something off my chest.
In math I used to sit next to some preppy girl and on the other side of her was my friend. So we normally just ignore her and talk, ya know? She flipped out.
Literally....flipped...out.
"OMG THEY'RE TALKING ABOUT DEATH"
Calm down lady. Doesn't she ever get jokes? Well, she probably doesn't, she isn't that smart. Like our whole math class.
Which reminds me, proofs are retarded. Geometry would be easy if it stuck with just shapes, and not proofing a triangle is a triangle. If you can't tell its a triangle you're either blind or just really stupid.
Eff you proofs, eff yooooou.
At least the teacher likes me, that's the only reason why I'm passing. Its called back talking, its fun. Especially since I think my teacher is slightly afraid of me.
Not like I'm much of a threat. I'm basically nothing except intelligent.
Blah, that's my random rant for now.
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 7:32 pm
A whisper;
Two days ago I drew Max. It was realistic, drawn with pen, and on lined notebook paper. Out of no where, I started drawing it, with all the creases and lines that are on a human face, but you rarly draw with Pen because it make sthem look old an dirty. I did the same with his hair and all of his clothes. He was laying on the cold, dirty, night time street. His beany fell off and was laying by his head. His eyes were open, one hand bent and out of the scene, the other arm by his side. His lips were partly open. There was a smear of bloodon his cheek, some coming out of his mouth, and his throat was slit. There was blood spilling out and soaking his sweatshit.
"What are you drawing? Besides a person."
Maria's good at not getting supid answers.
"An Ex-Boyfriend, I'm murdering him on paper so I won't do it in real life."
Even though he wasn't really my boyfriend. He was more than that to me.
"Well that's a lovely thought"
"It's theraputic."
No one really asked about it after that. Except for Cristina, my best lady friend, who likes my art. We likes eachother's art, but she's the art major. Then I showed Alyssa yesterday and she was thrilled with the idea of him being dead.
Then, today, in the same Even Day notebook, I drew a woman. I was going to draw her exposed, her neck stretched out and her head up, waiting for him to kiss her neck. It turned into a woman hanging from a rope tied at her waist. She's wearing a shirt that's fallen off, so it's wrinkled and just above the rope, with some fabric hanign below the rope, just enough to cover her crotch. Then her feet dangle to the ground only a foot or so below her, her panties in a heap on the floor. Blood was scrapped out of her neck, and trinkling down her leg. There are two deep cuts in each arm, but you can't see them, because her hands are tied behind her back.
Someone in my French class, I think his name is Tyler, said, "That's a depressing picture."
"I know, I didn't mean for it to turn out that way, but it did."
It was going to be depressing to me, but sexy to other people.
"Can I see it?"
"Sure"
He looks at it for a second, then hands the notebook back.
"Yeah, that's depressing"
I laugh.
"I know."
Then I showed Cristina on the bus, she asked why blood was coming from "there". Her crotch, I guess. I said that I didn't know. That it looked right. I wasn't about to tell her about how that's what happened after I was raped. She knows it happened, but no one knows the goddamn details. I think that's the last one in my 5 or 6 picture searies of Realism Pen Hatrid Pictures. Yeah. I don't know. I wanted to say that.
And Jordan:
Is it wierd that I'm in Geometry Honors and French II Honors at the same time you are? Like, since you're a softmore and s**t?
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 7:38 pm
Mel: Nope, it isn't weird. Here we don't offer french honors, or Geometry honors.
The honor classes we normally fund are more on language arts and way higher math classes, like Calculus and trigonometry. Also we offer honors in History (which I'll do next year since I am very interested in history) and also science areas. But science sucks the s**t for me, so I say screw it.
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 7:54 pm
★★★ I don't really keep a journal, and I tend to fall into despair
easily. When I do, I tend to forget about things that I've
created and ideas I've come up. People then remind me of
them quite some time later, and I can't remember having
ever had such conversations. My head hurts from tension.★★★
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 8:39 pm
What the Whispers...say...
I shouldnt cry. And i shouldnt feel weak. But.. i can't help it.
What I say...
The feeling in my chest is soo painful. And the urge to shed tears is overwhelming. I feel emotions for no reason, and it makes me angry since i cant control them. I associated this emotion with self absence of identity though.. it seems the only right description for me at the moment.
I long to be able to express myself as i used to back in highschool.. but everything is changing to fast and i feel like i have gotten lost in this change.
I feel like im drifiting away from my usual self to pursue another path. The feeling of this change, is quickly consuming me.. and i fear for the worst that i'd just become another stereotype that people just point out on the street.
i cant seem to control this change.. it seems to be out of my reach. I feel like i dont know who i am anymore. I dont know who i want to be. Do i want to be.. a person who can clique with her cousins crew were they dont think your odd...or do i want to be a person, who embraces things not usually to embrace but finds sanctuary in her own realm while those of her extended family.. thinks she needs help and counseling because of her odd perspectives.
The feeling to please everyone has been overpowering my judgement lately.. and .. i cant help but cry. I hate it. who am i to please...i do not wish to be sent from myhouse.. but i do not wish people to judege me either...
so in conclusion...i wirite...i write away my pains.. and my worries...so those that read these...get a glimpse inside my head.
crying mad
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Posted: Fri Oct 20, 2006 10:41 pm
I just realised.
I like to feel.
[/whisper]
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Posted: Sat Oct 21, 2006 6:42 pm
For the last past couple of months I have noticed that I am no longer anything to anyone it seems.
My step dad has a favorite, and it isn't me. Although I don't like favorites, I think its better that it isn't me then Dan. But still, it hurts.
Also I feel like I am dead. I'm isolated. It isn't really fun, but you see a lot of new things this way.
I feel like I should bleed myself dry, but I don't. I've gone to trying to ignore it, but it doesn't help. Its all over that Dan is the favorite, and its killing me.
I swear I'm going to die one of these days from a broken heart.
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Posted: Sat Oct 21, 2006 10:23 pm
[ Message temporarily off-line ]
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Posted: Sun Oct 22, 2006 1:26 am
★★★ Death is an illusion, my dear child of the essence. It is one of many
countless intermediary states. You are already familiar with some of
these states, for you pass through them while still alive. You sleep,
you sneeze, you orgasm ... death is not an interruption of life. There is
not afterlife because there is no beforelife. There is only life. Death is
an outmoded concept. We sleep and we change. This is a restful stage,
the sleep between rebirths. When you wake up, who will you be next?★★★
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