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I've been a virgin all my life. i dont mean virgin as in sex. i mean virgin as in everything. drugs, alcohol, sex, making out, kissing.

I've never done anything.

My friends keep encouraging me to find someone to do something with, but whenever i try to, they tell me i'm trying to hard.

How do i get over trying to hard and how can i tell when im tryign to hard.

Is it all worth it or should i just stop tryign all together, and forget about it all, never have anythgin to do with it, and focus on my main priority of my religion.

because as much as i want to knwo what all of it, (making out, kissing, sex, oral, everything....except a**l) feels like. I'm not sure it'll ever happen because no one actually likes me.

Having experience means nothing. If you meet "the one" for you, they will not care what you know about things but will explore it with you. Trust me, I know. Just take your time and keep your priorities straight. best of luck.

My guy's in the same(ish) position as you are. His friends are pressuring him to get laid - as in, lose his virginity in a one-night stand. I say to you and him: screw what other people expect of you, and do what you want! Only have sex if you want to have sex. If you want a one-night stand, that should be your decision and your decision alone. But if you want to wait until you find the right person, then do that! If you make decisions about sex based on what other people want from you, you'll regret it.

You'll eventually find someone you really click with, and feel comfortable with (that's the main thing in my eyes, finding someone you're comfortable with). When you do, then you'll probably be willing to explore the sexual things you're not as of yet, plus other things as well.

I was in a similar position a few years ago, as was my girlfriend. Until I met her, I figured I wouldn't even experience a real kiss with a girl pretty much ever. I met her in my 5th year of highschool. I only needed four years of highschool, but I took a lot of extra classes so I'd be able to choose whatever I wanted to take in university. Turns out during my extra year, I also found the girl of my dreams. Now, I've tried a LOT of things I never thought I would. And it took being with her before I was comfortable doing any of those things, and it took being with me for her to be comfortable doing any of the stuff we've done.

So yeah, once you find the right person, then you'll get to explore anything and everything you're both comfortable with. Until then, just be you. As long as you're having fun and being you, you'll have no trouble finding that special someone.

Oh, and about experience...if I had the choice of dating someone who's been with a lot of people, or who hasn't been with anyone, I'd choose the latter. 'Cause who knows what typa trouble the former could have gotten themselves into. That's just a personal preference, though.

Hope that helps. smile

I'm kinda in the same situation, so I can sympathise with you to some degree. Until I was 17, I had never done anything and I finally got my first kiss two to three months before I turned 18. Well nothing has happened since.

It's really up to you whether you want to experience it so badly that you just go ahead and do it, or if you would rather wait until someone special comes along.

If you are happy to go out and do it with anyone, go for it. I pretty much did for my first kiss, but he was a good friend, so that made it a bit easier. But I am still waiting for the right guy for everything else.

But pretty much, no one can tell you whether to do it with some random or not, like I said, it's up to you how you decide to go about it

i can totally relate to what you're saying. i went through highschool w/out a boy so much as looking at me twice. any guy i ever talked to only saw me as a friend. it drove me nuts!

one suggestion i can give you is that you shouldn't be in a rush to just get with anyone just because you feel you need experience. i asked one of my guy friends if he would be interested in being my friend with benefits (fwb) and so we did that. we didnt have sex, but we did everything but. it wasnt a big deal for him because he had had girlfriends before and he had done everything we were doing with other girls so for him it was just "practice." i dont know if this is just me but.... its like when i do get a boyfriend i'm gonna be afraid to tell him about my first time kissing a guy, or the first time i saw a p***s, or my first time giving a blow job and all that. i suppose it can be different for guyz, because its socially acceptable that they play around a bit, but...just evaluate how you'll feel telling that special someone about your first time.

and personally i'd like a guy with no experience over one who has a lot. the less people a person has been with the less likely it will be that they have an std. plus you wont have to worry about them comparing you to their ex, or anyone they've been with before you.

Whether or not sexual experience is necessary, depends on the kinda of relationship you're looking for, and the person you're interested in. If the person you like is a virgin, chances are they're not going to care. They might be the sort who wants a very experienced lover. You don't know until you get to know them.

Just because you're interested in older women, doesn't mean all those women will be highly experienced, or want someone highly experienced. What you need to do is forget about how you think you'll do. Seriously, forget about it, because when you feel the time is right, and you're with someone you want to be intimate with, all those feelings will be forgotten. You have to talk to her, and find out what she likes. It doens't matter if you've slept with 100 women and satisfied all of them. The woman you end up with could be turned off by every trick.

I didn't have my first kiss until I was 16. Before I had it, I was paranoid that I'd suck. That I wouldn't satisfy the person I was with, or that they'd be disappointed. Everyone around me was having 'boyfriends', kissing them, holding hands and talking about sexual things. It put a lot of pressure on me. This made me go out and learn a lot about sex, sexual positions, tips, tricks, stories, movies, anything I could get my hands on. This helped, because it told me that different people like different things, so there's no point worrying whether you'd be good enough, or if you had enough experience.

The person you're with can help you. If you decide to be with someone you know, someone you trust, then you can talk to them about how you feel. They might have experience and help you discover yourself, or they might be a virgin and learn with you. Having sex because your friends are putting that much pressure on you is stupid. Hold yourself higher than that and tell them to @$!* off. If you don't want to do something, don't do it. If you have sex, do anything sexual with someone, or even kiss someone when you really don't want too, you'll probably regret it later.

Quite frankly, sexual experience is only as important as the individual makes it.