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 Posted: Fri Oct 08, 2004 8:22 am
[NOTICE: if you hate references to religion or Jesus... you may not want to read this because I have several. so, if you don't mind and are curious. read away at your own risk.]
I have a mini testimony. Well, there is a girl at my work. She's barely been there a year... and is already almost a manager. anyways... she started off in the Rzone which is our video game area. I was sooo disgruntled about that. I wanted to work over there forever; but i'm a girl. then it turned out when she started they needed help over there really bad, so they just put here there. She ended up doing really well. so, they made her world leader of babies. Well.. it didn't really matter to me personally. I had been there through two world leaders already. But.. when she came... she wasn't doing anything but being on the phone and on the computer. She never helped clean up, straighten or reshop.. the normal stuff everyone does. and man.. let me tell you... all the girls who take turns working in babies as normal employees were all pissed... lol. then, nadia came back from her maternity leave. She started getting on jamie. But.. thing is.. during that time, everyone was always complaining about her. and i said in my heart... wouldn't it be Christ's way instead of being mad at her or talking about her... to treat her with kindness and make her feel wanted. So, here comes me riding in on my donkey of kindness. I was going out of my way to do nice stuff for her and help her. And, I'd talk to her and stuff. I was the only one who did this mind you... but about 4-5 months down the line, she started telling our store manager how she missed the rzone and her friends. I guess she didn't want to always be back there. so, they started letting her serve as a manager on duty for a few shifts a week. And, they didn't mind cuz we're one manager short. Well, ever since then, she is always nagging me about getting all these bday sign up quotas and all this other stuff.... and it just really ticks me off sometimes. cuz i see a lot of people who she doesn't nag about anything. she has picked her favorites. i mean.. i don't care if i'm a favorite or not. but she often singles me out and picks on me a lot. She doesn't do it in the direct mean way either. She does it in the phony "acting likei'm being nice but you're the only one who'll listen to me so i do it to you" way. have i ever mentioned how phony people just get me going anyways? Cuz i really can't stand that.. either like me or don't. but, don't act like you're my friend if you're not. sooooo....
my point is... when everyone talked about her, did i? no.
when everyone thought she made the crappiest world leader so far, I helped her and was her friend....
and now that she's getting management privs.. i feel like she's turned around and for my kindness rewarded me with thinking i'm just nice enough for her to walk all over. well...i've been stewing on this for a while. quite a while... and i want to tell her all this to her face. i want to confront her. but how do you confront someone who is in managerial type spot? i might tell the store manager and then tell him i wanna talk to her and if he can give me tips or suggestions. but...
last night, she was there and doing her normal thing. and lately at work, when stuff happens, i'll be like thank you Jesus. I am more than overcomer thu you. and i tell myself i can do all thigns thru Christ. then.. i suddenly felt this move in my spirit to hug her. omg..lol. so i did it. just like that. She just stepped back for a second. and I saw this look in her eyes. and the normal phony look that's usually there left. I know it touched her. and I guess she thought I felt bad for her or somethign and was apologizing. and, I told her that i just really felt in the spirit that she needed a hug. So i gave her one. but...
afterwards... i went off to straighten my area of the store. and I suddenly felt this release in my soul. and by hugging her, i was able to overcome a lot of those feelings i've been having. i still want to talk to her; but a lot of the angst i had in my over it just slipped away. and... i kind of feel even tho it still needs resolving how i've forgiven her in my heart. And, that forgiving felt soooo gooood. man. I just wanted to share this story because i feel it's a testimony on how we're supposed to overcome people's evil with good. and how that good can really do things we don't see.
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Posted: Fri Oct 08, 2004 8:38 am
Good for you- instead of making that situation worse by being negative, you followed your instincts and made it better 3nodding She will probably have more respect for you now than if you hade had an angry confrontation.
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Posted: Fri Oct 08, 2004 8:55 am
Wow, you're a strong woman! I don't think I would've done that, no, I'm pretty sure I wouldnt have : /
I hope that she can straighten up and start treating you w/respect
I too do not like fake, I have a sister in law who has fake down to a T.
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Posted: Fri Oct 08, 2004 1:22 pm
Hmm, interesting. Don't be afraid to confront someone if they're being like that. Just a nice headsup sometimes helps.
Is this at your church all this happened?
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Posted: Sat Oct 09, 2004 9:21 am
I admire you for being able to do that. I just felt the need to give one small piece of advice you have to be careful to not let that person that you are being nice to walk all over you. I've had that happen when i've been in that situation before.
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Posted: Sat Oct 09, 2004 9:52 pm
lunashock Hmm, interesting. Don't be afraid to confront someone if they're being like that. Just a nice headsup sometimes helps. Is this at your church all this happened? no.. it's at work. i work at a toys r us. and thanks guys. i just really wanted to share that. my heart tells me that her behavior might not change right away. but... i am purposing in my heart to continue to overcome her evil with good. not to say her phoniness makes her evil... but... it's the metaphor in the saying.
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Posted: Sun Nov 13, 2005 11:59 pm
Graceangel lunashock Hmm, interesting. Don't be afraid to confront someone if they're being like that. Just a nice headsup sometimes helps. Is this at your church all this happened? no.. it's at work. i work at a toys r us. and thanks guys. i just really wanted to share that. my heart tells me that her behavior might not change right away. but... i am purposing in my heart to continue to overcome her evil with good. not to say her phoniness makes her evil... but... it's the metaphor in the saying. hehe i might not have done it that way but i think you did the right thing. btw i work at a toys r us too, or did... might be changing (vacationing issues), and man... i'd have loved to work in rzone all day... meh glad you could be the bigger person
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Posted: Mon Nov 14, 2005 10:36 am
Wow, that was really pleasing to read, *Smiles* I doubt I would have done that.. I often feel the need to hug people in situations like that, but I never do because I'm shy, and in the workplace I'm quite solitary (other people talk about their personal lives in what I consider excess, seem to make fast friends with their co-workers and managers, always inviting each other to do things outside of the workplace and I... don't take my work home, if that makes sense, nor do I bring my personal life into my work for the most part... it just seems out of place to me), and am not sure if it'd be weird or not to just hug someone that I barely know. I'm pleased you did, though, and it kind of encourages me on the subject. I always try to be kind and fair to people, workplace or otherwise, but sometimes I'm really not sure if it works.. I try to be nice and offer my help, and sometimes people seem unhappy with my help (recently, I had a person tell me, in a snotty manner, that a word I gave her didn't exist, and then tell me it helped her and thanked me for it... I was, and am, sorta negatively baffled/irritated.)
But, seeing other people being kind -whether there are immediate positive or negative effects, or not- is encouraging.
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Posted: Fri Feb 17, 2006 10:02 pm
Admirable, Graceangel, truly admirable.
How do you keep from handling things with negative confrontations? Phonies drive me absolutely nuts!
If you'd be interested in PMing me about this, I'd have no objections. I have some similar issues going on, and think your advice might help.
Take care.
Edit: Sorry if I necroed this.
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