Welcome to Gaia! ::

Infinite possibilities-A writer's guild

Back to Guilds

This is a writer's guild where all can gather for feedback and advice on all mediums of writing. Plus it's a great place for conversation. 

Tags: Writing, Writer, Writer's Block, Critiques, Friends 

Reply Works in Progress
Untitled, yet.. >__>

Quick Reply

Enter both words below, separated by a space:

Can't read the text? Click here

Submit

Sulfurous

PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2006 5:26 pm


Okay, -warning- The page I have here is one of the last pages of my [long] graphic novel in progress. [Yes, Im working on the pages out of order, and yes I realize it can complicate matters later. >__>] It contains a key plot turn. In fact, it is the HEIGHT of the ENDING. k?


SO. Those who want to experience this story at its fullest, do not read the page I have posted.


Those who don't care about spoilers, read ahead, and I would LOVE your opinions and advice. This is one of my first serious attempts to actually put down one of my graphic novels on paper, so I would love to hear what you think. biggrin
PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2006 5:27 pm


Story's basic, straightforward, timeline:

- Lilith is introduced. She is a normal young woman, about 20, with a boyfriend who she loves dearly and who loves her. They have been dating for about a year. His name is Lucas, and is introduced shortly after. He works at home, while she works out during the day, at/with what/where is not specified.

- Adonis visits Lucas while Lilith is at work. Lucas and Adonis haven't seen each other in several years. They don't get along well. It is a short visit.

- Lilith's slight drinking problem is revealed. She gets drunk, and has sex with Lucas, or so she thinks. As it turns out, Lucas has a manipulative twin brother, Adonis.

- Lilith becomes pregnant. She doesn't know who the father is, as she has been actively having sex with Lucas, and had drunkenly cheated on him with Adonis. To complicate things, twins' DNA are the same, making it impossible to tell who the father is even with genetic testing.

- Obviously, Lucas finds out eventually and practically kills Adonis. Lilith intervenes and pretty much saves his life. It is revealed here that there is something very strange about the two brothers. You can tell there is something strange about them. Lilith didn't notice this before, either.

- Adonis moves into Lilith and Lucas' two-story house, because of the child. They [the three of them] are undecided as to what will happen with it just yet.

- Lilith gives birth to Aiden. It is decided that the three of them will take care of him together. Lucas will be deemed the father, and Adonis will be declared uncle. Lilith also officially gives up alcohol.

- Lucas' father, Beelzebub, appears. He says he is running, from others of them. Lucas doesn't quite understand, [he himself doesn't know what he is] but Beelzebub makes it clear that Lucas, himself, and his brother are not human. He doesn't go into details about what they really are, but they are beyond physical limits. He reveals that he, Beelzebub, is King of their kind, and that would make the twins princes. Beelzebub also ends up staying in their household.

[Beelzebub is running from his King-hood. He got bored of ruling and wanted to live a free life, but his followers aren't too fond of that, so they are constantly trying to find him to make him come back home to rule.]

- Griffon and Minotaur appear. They are both generals who served under Beelzebub. They refuse to leave until Beelzebub regains his senses and returns home with them. They stay in the house as well, and over a long period of time, grow to love it there, though that is never stated outright.

- Basilisk appears. He is a much more malevolent general. He uses underhanded tactics to attempt to convince Beelzebub to return. [If you were to give him a D&D Alignment, XD, Chaotic Lawful.] Basilisk is a distant cousin of Minotaur, and it is clear that Minotaur doesn't like him. Basilisk teases Minotaur a lot. He moves into the house. [Noticing a pattern? XD ]

- - - Several years and events pass, where Lilith ages, Aiden grows up, etc etc. It becomes a little more obvious that something is very different about Lucas&supernatural co.

- Lilith, in her mid 30s, has a breakdown. She is drunk when Lucas finds her naked on their bedroom floor. She is worried [understatement] that when she dies, everyone will move on and forget about her. Lucas reminds her just how much everyone loves her, and calms her down.

- - - More living stuff happens.

- Lilith, age 70, [you are here] is dying. It is never made clear the cause, whether it be disease or age. Lucas is with her in the hospital, and Griffon and Minotaur are watching from outside. Through all this time, they haven't aged. It's blatantly clear now that Lucas&supernatural co. are immortal, and do not grow old past a certain age. As Lilith dies, Lucas and Lilith say their last goodbyes. Minotaur and Griffon do the same [it is never made distinctly clear whether the two were just close friends, or something more.] The heartbeat dies, and Lucas, Minotaur, and Griffon are gone.

Sulfurous


Sulfurous

PostPosted: Thu Sep 07, 2006 5:28 pm


[THE PAGE]
User Image

I cried while I drew this.
Also, I might edit colors and stuff, so don't rub your eyes too furiously in disbelief if it looks different. XD
PostPosted: Fri Sep 08, 2006 11:53 am


No spoliers!!
lol I didnt read any of it.
But I took a look at the page
just to see the way its drawn.

And you are amazing.

But I wish to read your story
from beginning to end.

Tak-Jak
Vice Captain


Sulfurous

PostPosted: Fri Sep 08, 2006 4:30 pm


;n; Im working on it slowly. Progress is pathetic though XD

Graphic novels, so tedious ;A;;; Hopefully I'll be able to make some progress though.
PostPosted: Sat Sep 09, 2006 8:53 pm


Great drawing and story telling as always.

Xahmen
Vice Captain


XshutterflyX

PostPosted: Sat Sep 16, 2006 8:03 pm


Wow... That's really cool. Awesome drawings, too.
Reply
Works in Progress

 
Manage Your Items
Other Stuff
Get GCash
Offers
Get Items
More Items
Where Everyone Hangs Out
Other Community Areas
Virtual Spaces
Fun Stuff
Gaia's Games
Mini-Games
Play with GCash
Play with Platinum