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Q1: ok so this is what i tell everyone (lil late i think but still better than not)
tri protection is key
wtf is tri protection?
1 rubber
spermaside
and the pill or even better...depo (the shot)[really hard to mess up depo]
this combination makes suprise a rather large statistical imposibility(just think about it and it should make sence...really how many times can a plan get messed up)

let your doctors in on the deal (THEY CAN NOT SAY ANYTHING (LEGALY) TO ANY NON STAFF/THOSE WHO NEED NOT KNOW-THIS INCLUDES PARENTS)

get tested dammit
be safe
(rant compleated...I think)

im fairly sure the day after is out (72 hours after)
HER DOCTOR SOULD KNOW ABOUT WHAT SHES DOING SHOULD SHE CHOOSE THE DAY AFTER PILL SO SHE CAN BE MONITERED (she may not stop bleeding if ya know what im talking about)

and then theres abortion or adoption
whats importent is what is in your heart of hearts not the word of ANYone else myself and the bible included

perhaps abortion is wrong
perhaps life doesn't begin untill some set amount of time (7 months or whatever idk)
perhaps there is more to life then breathing perhaps love and pain whatever idk
perhaps the aborted doesn't just go away perhaps there is the same potential every time should you make it so (if that makes any sence)
(wow that was kinda one sided) whatever...you fill in the blanks

note: age is not a defining factor but a percived love is

as for your rents
true love is unconditional, your parents should be a piller of strengh and not to fear...they should understand and if not a long snowy winter may be their final fate as they have chosen it...regardless of your reaction

Q2:
ok new consept (well not new but something i haven't see for a long time)

supose you are god
and so is she
perhaps it is well enough for you both to bless eachother with your love and as long as you both stay true to your heart of hearts heaven will always be with you

any q's

Question #1:

How does she think she's pregnant, and how long has it been since the two of you had sex? People, especially, girls, are usually torally paranoid about being pregnant after their first time. That's not to say that she shouldn't be aware of any changes in her body, but unless she's missed her period by more than a day or two already, I wouldn't start to panic yet.

Did you guys use protection?

If you're both very concerned, go pick up an at-home pregnancy test. It's always better to know than to not know, right? If the test comes back positive, your girlfriend should make an appointment with her doctor to have the results confirmed. (Or, if she's still worried she might be pregnant and the test comes back negative, she should still make an appointment with her doctor to check the accuracy of the results.)

If she is pregnant, she (as well as you; I take it you want to be involved with these decisions), there are three options: She can get an abortion, she can carry it to term and put it up for adoption after birth (or arrange for a family to adopt it even before it's born), or she can keep the baby and raise it herself (with the help of you and her family, in an ideal situation).

Now, you and she may or may not see abortion as an option. However, it's the only option that gets rid of the issue of being pregnant, and depending on where you live, abortion clinics legally cannot notify the parents of a minor is she has an abortion. So I'm not sure what your feelings on that are, but it is something out there that you might have to consider.

Putting the baby up for adoption will mean that you and she have no responsibilities as a parent, but would still have to deal with the pregnancy, and there would really be no way to hide it from your parents. But, it would mean that you could both finish school, go on to university, etc. without having a child to take care of and support. The baby would (hopefully) go to a stable, loving home with parents who really want a child.

Lastly, keeping the baby is sometimes seen as the most "difficult" option in a situation like this, but on an emotional level, it might actually be the easiest. It's a very difficult decision to abort a fetus, and it's very difficult to watch another couple walk away with your child (in the case of adoption). My sister had her nephew when she was 16, and with the help of our parents, she was able to finish school and be a very good mother. It's not an impossible thing to do, although it's not easy, and it's even less easy without help and support from family members. But it is something worth thinking about.



Now, how to tell your parents. If she's not pregnant, I wouldn't tell your parents at all. Doctor visits are all confidential, and if neither of you drive, you could find a ride with someone else or use whatever public transportation you have at your disposal. If she is pregnant...well, you don't have to tell them if she gets an abortion, most likely, but with any other option, you will have to tell them. You say that they'd kill you, which I honestly doubt. I don't know your parents, but most kids tend to exaggerate a wee bit when it comes to the wrath of their parents. They'll be angry, of course, but you're still their son, and your girlfriend is still her parents' daughter. Hopefully both sets of parents will be able to put their anger aside and help you both through a difficult time.


Question #2:

Beyond continuing to invite her to church and/or youth groups with you, and living by example, there's not a whole lot more you can do. If you start pressuring her, she'll probably shut down to the idea all together. Ultimately, it has to be her decision and on on else's. If she keeps an interest in converting, keep gently guiding her along, giving her information, answering her questions, etc. If she decides that she'd rather not get into Christianity, you need to respect that as well.

How does she think she's pregnant-
because a test said so. just 2 days ago....

Did you guys use protection?
Duh!

If the test comes back positive, your girlfriend should make an appointment with her doctor to have the results confirmed.
we want to but she is 16 and her mom will find out....

Now, you and she may or may not see abortion as an option.
Its pretty much the only option right now. (sadly)




Now, how to tell your parents....
.....but you're still their son,
adopted at the age of 12


Question #2:

Beyond continuing to invite her to church and/or youth groups with you, and living by example, there's not a whole lot more you can do. If you start pressuring her, she'll probably shut down to the idea all together. Ultimately, it has to be her decision and on on else's. If she keeps an interest in converting, keep gently guiding her along, giving her information, answering her questions, etc. If she decides that she'd rather not get into Christianity, you need to respect that as well.
she is very interested, i just dont know if she knows how to take it farther. and i am scared to push it.....

They will know about ehr appointment because, currently neither of us can drive. And neither of us have money to buy a second test. so we are basically f***ed. pardon my language.Partially yes, and also because i am going to caollege four hours away soon. and she doesnt wat kids. she is scared that she will hurt them somehow.Ye but they arent as coppasionate and understanding as my real parents sed to be. and they are really strict and like to yell at me. bcause when something is an accident it is still my fault.
i know that. i just dont know if she knows how to make the decision.

No, not really. You can take a bus, you can get a friend to drive you (surely at age 17 you have friends who drive), you can ride a bike or walk if it's close...get creative. Because it's important. I'm not sure what the abortion laws where you live are, but the odds are that even if she does get an abortion, she needs to see a doctor first. And if she decides to carry it to term, she'll still need to see a doctor. So you're really going to have to figure out a way to do it one way or the other, and the sooner the better.
Well, I don't want to turn this into a debate on abortion, but if she had help with raising the child, I doubt she'd hurt it.

Or she could put it up for adoption after it's born, and not have to worry about raising it at all.

Well, yes, they will probably yell at you. I would probably yell at my son too if his girlfriend and he were going to have a baby when he was 17, but that's a natural reaction for a parent to have. It doesn't mean that the anger won't pass and they won't still be supportive.

Thanks for the compliment. Good idea though.

the term is abstinence and that has a failure rate as well, in fact its really high because when you give in... you have nothing to protect you. im one for good sexual education.

As for the one asking for advice, if you are thinking about abortion, its better to do it early then too late. As much fear as you have in you, its better to have her see a doctor. seriously, if she took an over the counter test and it came back positive, you have to start taking responsibility for what is going on. And for future reference if you arent ready for the responsibility, wait, and always have some form of protection just in case.

/2cents