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 Posted: Mon May 16, 2005 9:25 pm
- May 17 - 12:20am
Woke up in a morgue today... God damn those scalpels hurt. You'd think that the undead would at least have the luxury of dead nerves, but nooo... nerves feel fine, stomach's always givin' me s**t, and my motor skills are shot all to hell. Seriously, aside from immortality (assuming I can keep all of my parts), there are no upsides to being undead. My arm is this close from falling off... only so much fishing line can be used to hold it in place. And these stupid city officials, always picking me up and dropping me off in a different morgue. I mean really, can't a guy just lie down and decompose on the sidewalk or in an alleyway anymore? Ugh... I'm too pissed to keep this up tonight.
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Posted: Wed May 18, 2005 10:15 am
- May 18 - 1:16pm
I take back a portion of the last entry. There is one other good thing about being undead that I can think of... I don't have to worry about liver failure. I can drink as much as I want and I won't die... because I already did. On the downside, you still get hangovers... my head is killing me... heh, that's funny. Crap, I shouldn't laugh, makes it hurt more. Last night was good though... so good I can't remember it, but that's ok! I'm most likely better off. Last time I was that drunk I ended up chasing my own kidney down a subway track after tripping and falling on the third rail. Not fun.
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Posted: Thu May 19, 2005 11:33 am
- May 19 - 2:34pm
I hate the day. It's too bright... stupid sun... I'd shake my fist at it, but sudden movement does not mix well with decaying skin. And I'm really close to pulling off my own nose, because, believe it or not, I smell. I hate to admit it, but I do. I'd go take a shower, but since I awoke to realize I was no longer among the living but in this crappy a** limbo state, I can't remember where I live. Or anything about myself for that matter. I remember everything but personal details and memories. Really annoying if you think about it. So, I don't have a place to live, shower, eat, or a name. People take having a name for granted, but honestly, I don't have much use for one anymore. I'll name myself eventually, but more importantly... I need a damn bath.
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Posted: Thu May 19, 2005 9:54 pm
- May 20 - 12:55pm
A dip in the creek a bath does not make. Now I'm all bloated... literally... it sucks. I'm gonna have to hide in these woods for a while to avoid the sun, otherwise I'll smell even worse. Know what else? I'm really, really hungry. I remember zombie movies from way back when (still not my name though, go figure), and how they'd always eat brains. Maybe I'll try it... what would they do as punishment, kill me? Pfft... it's not looking too bad at this point. I'll try anything once though. In the mean time, I think I see a deer...
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Posted: Sat May 21, 2005 1:04 am
- May 21 - 4:03am
Deer is good... tough and hairy, but good. Unfortunately, it knocked out three teeth when it kicked me in the jaw. Taking down a deer with your bare hands isn't easy. I tried to bite it, but that was a mistake. At least it was sleeping at first. I was lucky, I doubt I'll find another deer any time soon. At least I'm full for the time being. And I'm dry! I think I dried out a little too much though... maybe I'll still stay out of the sun for a while. I don't know what will happen if I dry out... I don't want to be a mummy. I'm mobile now and at this point, I'm happy just walking and keeping all of my appendages.
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Posted: Sat May 21, 2005 9:36 pm
- May 22 - 12:31am
I made a fire because deer tastes decidedly better cooked. The fire's drying my out even more, so I have to soak in a nearby creek. As you can imagine, the smell is not improving. I'm raiding a gas station for some air fresheners later... a lot of them. As it would turn out... deer does not smell very well the second day. there are flies eveywhere. Guess I should pick up some bug spray in my raid. If the cops follow me or something, I could blow up the cans in the fire to provide cover. I'm completely running away with my beer though...
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Posted: Sun May 22, 2005 9:21 pm
- May 23 - 12:16am
Forest burned down. I left for the raid, but the store was closed and I couldn't find a way in... so I just went back so I could rob the clerk the next morning. When I got back, my campfire spread and engulfed the forest. So now I'm stuck under this stupid highway overpass. Believe it or not, it smells worse under here than I do and to kick it all off, I'm out of deer!
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Posted: Mon May 23, 2005 9:49 pm
- May 24 - 12:47am
That hobo was disgusting. Must've been the lung cancer or emphysema... or whatever it was that made him cough like hell and stop running after i bit him. Doubt he had long left anyway. Lucky me, I went from fresh deer to rotten bum... way to downgrade. This leads me to conclude that the movie zombies only ate brains because they're the best part. Tastes just like pudding really, only less mushy. I still prefer real pudding though, which reminds me... I need a mini fridge. I'm thinking of breaking into a Target tonight, pick up some supplies. It's kinda funny, the only thing I ever stole before I became a zombie were some Legos when I was seven. It's funny how dying and being trapped in a decaying heap of a body warps your morals.
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Posted: Wed May 25, 2005 4:54 pm
- May 25 - 7:50pm
Aparantly you can't eat a hobo without getting shot. They were so rude too, didn't give me any warning. I was just minding my own business, finishing off the last of my hobo and BAM! shot in the a**. It hurts like hell, but at least I don't have to worry about dying of blood loss or anything. Besides, I was shot in the a**. No vital organs there. This does suck though, because now I'm being followed and I can't dig the bullet out. Hurts like hell... damn cops with their "don't eat him" and "let go of my leg". Bastards deserved to get a chunk taken out of 'em... too bad I couldn't finish though, they tasted much better than the hobo. It's getting dark, hopefully I can hide out for the night.
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Posted: Wed May 25, 2005 10:31 pm
- May 26 - 1:30am
I'm so tired. I lost the cops and just collapsed in a ditch next to a factory. Woke up about 10 minutes ago and realized something... I'm sleeping in chemicals. What kind... I'm not sure. But in any case, dead or alive, being covered in chemicals are not good. Especially right now, I don't think I'd manage very well glowing flourescent green while running from the cops. i really hope this crap doesn't screw me up, and with my luck, it will. But yeah, I need to find a new place to sleep, because I'd really not like to grow a third skeleton arm out of my back or some crazy crap like that. I've got immortality as long as my body holds out, and I'm sure these chemicals arent helping leep my innards intact.
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Posted: Thu May 26, 2005 9:38 pm
- May 27 - 12:35am
I found an abandoned warehouse. I should hope I'd get some privacy here, seeing as it's condemned. If the police follow me in, I could always go up to the second and third floor. I doubt anybody would want to risk their life looking up there. That's perfect, considering I don't have a life to risk. Only thing I have to worry about now is food and this rash I have on my back. Damn chemicals... hope this goes away. I doubt it though, I haven't much faith in my healing capabilities lately. I guess getting some food would help any healing along some, maybe some soup or something. As for tomorow, I foresee another gas station raid. This one will be farther away though, I wouldn't want to draw attention to the area surrounding my hideout.
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Posted: Fri May 27, 2005 11:38 pm
- May 28 - 2:35am
Well it's about damn time. I had to walk across town, but I finally managed to pull off a successful supply run. I now have enough pork rinds, Cheetos, Dr. Pepper, beer, candy, and donuts to last me a while. I also filled up on those old hot dogs they left out in that slow cooker... thing... Too bad I ate them all, I like meat. Really though, that went well, I'm surprised no one would stop a decaying guy pushing a shopping cart down the road for a few hours. But hey, I'm not complaining. I plan on just sitting here, munching on pork rinds for the rest of the night, relaxing, and going to get really, really drunk. I'm kinda tired though, maybe I'll skip the pork rinds and just go straight to the beer...
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Posted: Sun May 29, 2005 1:47 am
- May 30 - 4:45am
Ow. Just... ow. Damn brain... with its pounding and hurting... and more pounding. I drank too much again and now I slept an entire day away. Not like I had anything important to do today. there was some annoying beeping outside, sounded like construction equipment or something. All I know is, it's not helping my head any. I'm going back to bed, maybe the headache will be gone later on, assuming I can get to sleep with all this damn pounding.
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Posted: Sun May 29, 2005 10:27 pm
- May 30 - 1:25am
Aparantly my building is scheduled for demolition. I finally find a decent place to leave and I wake up to find a wrecking ball parked outside. This is just my luck. wait a minute... what if I steal the wrecking ball... I just got a great idea. I'll drive off with it, hide it somewhere, and use it as my trump card if the police ever find me. I doubt they left the keys in it... so I'll have to hotwire it. Good thing I stole some tools when I got the food, even if it is just some basic ones for emergencies. I'll hotwire the wrecking ball and save my home. This didn't turn out so bad after all.
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Posted: Mon May 30, 2005 10:52 am
- May 30 - 1:51 am
Well, that did not go at all as planned. Not only did the wrecking ball catch fire, but as the treads melted on one side, the uneve surface of the ground caused it to tip over... onto my building. I'm back to having nothing again and most likely there will be some investigation that will lead to the police tailing me again. Speaking of which, I hear sirens now, but I think it's just the fire trucks. I'm watching them take care of everything from a rooftop across the street. I climbed up the fire escape of an apartment building and now I'm just watching the show. Wait a minute... I think someone's coming...
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