Let's create our own religion.

[Lethkhar]

Now, before you flame me, hear me out.

Many atheist groups have created things like this. Some examples include the Invisible Pink Unicorn (Blessed be her hooves) and the Flying Spaghetti Monster.

I merely suggest that we create a parody like this and maybe make a siggy art of it or something. Maybe have a contest...

C'mon, we're all creative people. Surely we can think of something original. If we get together, throw some ideas around, and agree on something, I'd be willing to fund a contest for the best picture of it.

Or we could not do it. It's just a suggestion.  

[Muaethia]

lmao!!!

Fantastic! Piss-take, right? But we'd have to try and do it without being too insulting to avoid flamers O_o

How about... a religion 'worshiping' cheese?

Or how about a cutlery based religion- the trinity- "In the name of the knife, the spatula and the holy spork".

A spork-based thing could be funny xd

And we have to poke people with sporks to convert them.

Then they will be posessed with the power of the Holy Spork, and will have enlightened lives.  

[S. Shark]

Why can't we worship Flying Spaghetti Monster? crying We'd be the first guild to officially endorse His Noodliness, and I'm sorry but I refuse to have any other gods before Him.

(But if you're going to anyway, you know that joke picture of Dathu shirtless against the guild banner? It's in the post your pics thread or somethin' like that. That should totally be our god image. )  

[caustic 0_0]

You young silly fools who don't remember our old joke!


Creating joke religions is always going to be offensive to someone. It's supposed to be a serious thing that matters to people. But I never really understood why it should be so sacred and untouchable by humor. I think of it like political cartoons. Even when I was younger and Christian, some friends and I would make it through gym class or where ever else we were bored by coming up with elaborate religious things. We had one about muffins. 3nodding
And then more recently in high school, a guy (gay male friend which makes this even more amusing) and I were both god and we would smite people in english class. Some very very stupid and bad dressing people in our english class. o.x We had the machine gun of holy love and the cattle prod of joy, etc, with which to spread God's glory. 3nodding And everyone else had "Not-god" numbers instead of names.

I like Muaethia's trinity. xD  

[Lethkhar]

Well, I was thinking of a character that was a bit more original...Y'know, Ferris wasn't created by us.

Now, Muaethia's got something there. Perhaps we could add something about the perfect balance of cheese and crackers, sort of like a Yin and Yang type thing? And surely we must consider the Iron Chef our version of the Pope?  

[Phoebos]

I hereby declare that we should all worship the Flaming Marshmallow on a Stick!
 

[Muaethia]

Phoebos

I hereby declare that we should all worship the Flaming Marshmallow on a Stick!

I once stuck a marshmallow into an open fire.

It didn't look too good whe I took it out.



And I was so tired I couldn't take a photo straight...

Ahhh, the machine gun of holy love. We must also worship the Nukes of the Spirit of Peace.

Hmmm, yin and yang in cheese and crackers? But it is so difficult to get a perfect balance! Surely this is a cause of corruption in our God's perfect world? How about we worship the spork as a perfect being, a fusion between the fork and the spoon so perfect it is beyond mortal understanding.

The fpoon is satan.  

[Tenth Speed Writer]

The fpoon is misunderstood!

Hail Fpoon!  

[Bowmore]

Ferris, the Fpoon, and the Flaming Marshmallow are my holy trinity.  

[Muaethia]

addseale2

The fpoon is misunderstood!

Hail Fpoon!

Well, MY holy book (The Collinder) says that the fpoon is seated on the left hand side of the Spork

And our main prophet, Mr Whisk, is seated on the right.

The fpoon leads everyone into the fires of Wok of Damnation! Where all of the sinners go! The sinners follow the fpoon in his evil ways, which include the evil practice of Kettleworship.

Mr whisk died on a chopping board to save us from our sins. He rose again in the Oven of Glory, as he became coated with the Blessed Dust of self-raising flour :0

Let the power of the Holy Spork fill you! Let it tear through your flesh and pierce your heart in a way never felt by mankind before! FEEL the WRATH OF THE SPORK descend and fill you with ETERNAL GLORY!

JOIN US! And receive the weekly worship sprinkling of Self-Raising flour, so you too may rise again after death into the ultimate state of enlightenment- we call it the Refridgerator of Rest. You shall be at peace with your Maker, O LORD Spork.  

[Lethkhar]

Muaethia

addseale2

The fpoon is misunderstood!

Hail Fpoon!

Well, MY holy book (The Collinder) says that the fpoon is seated on the left hand side of the Spork

And our main prophet, Mr Whisk, is seated on the right.

The fpoon leads everyone into the fires of Wok of Damnation! Where all of the sinners go! The sinners follow the fpoon in his evil ways, which include the evil practice of Kettleworship.

Mr whisk died on a chopping board to save us from our sins. He rose again in the Oven of Glory, as he became coated with the Blessed Dust of self-raising flour :0

Let the power of the Holy Spork fill you! Let it tear through your flesh and pierce your heart in a way never felt by mankind before! FEEL the WRATH OF THE SPORK descend and fill you with ETERNAL GLORY!

JOIN US! And receive the weekly worship sprinkling of Self-Raising flour, so you too may rise again after death into the ultimate state of enlightenment- we call it the Refridgerator of Rest. You shall be at peace with your Maker, O LORD Spork.

Hm...My religion states that it's the Refridgerator of Tranquility. I guess I'll have to break away and make my own branch of Culinarism.  

[Phoebos]

All hail the Flaming Marshmallow on a Stick!

Or perish in the Bonfire of Doom!  

[Muaethia]

Phoebos

All hail the Flaming Marshmallow on a Stick!

Or perish in the Bonfire of Doom!

O RLY?

I think we should be worshiping the stick rather than the marshmallow.

The stick has a purpose, the marshmallow does not.

@_@ but it's so pretty...

Anyway, we should woship the stick as it is a form of cutlery 3nodding  

[Yami-no-Albedo]

All hail... this donut!




*Makes a circular motion on chest* In the name of the Frosting, the Cream Filling and the Holy Coffee. This donut died on a plate for all of your donut-related sins. He was eaten by the devil, who is actually me. (I love donuts...) Our holy leader isn't the pope, but rather the Grand Holy Krispy Kreme Employee Of The Month. (We change leaders a lot...)Nonbelievers will be forced to eat old stale donuts and drink week-old coffee until they convert to Donutism! The power of Krispy Kreme compells you!  

[Lethkhar]

Yami-no-Albedo

All hail... this donut!




*Makes a circular motion on chest* In the name of the Frosting, the Cream Filling and the Holy Coffee. This donut died on a plate for all of your donut-related sins. He was eaten by the devil, who is actually me. (I love donuts...) Our holy leader isn't the pope, but rather the Grand Holy Krispy Kreme Employee Of The Month. (We change leaders a lot...)Nonbelievers will be forced to eat old stale donuts and drink week-old coffee until they convert to Donutism! The power of Krispy Kreme compells you!

rofl (Literally)