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 Posted: Tue Apr 12, 2005 10:47 pm
 This thread is for people who wish to share their stories about pregnancy, abortion, birth and/or raising a child from a young age. Basically anyone who wishes to share their story can do so in here. No flaming anyone please, this is an open forum and people are to feel welcome here. 3nodding So please don't judge people based on their past choices, or anything like that. At the very least, read their stories and learn from them, if you yourself are in a difficult situation and don't know what to do. Maybe someone will learn something from these stories. smile A big thank you of appreciation to anyone who decides to post their story here. heart
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Posted: Sat Apr 16, 2005 1:50 pm
This is more the "other side" I suppose. I dunno, I started babbling in another thread before I thought, oops, maybe this belongs in the Life Experiences" section. So, here it goes:
By choice I wanted to wait until I was 18 to date. I didn't want to waste my time with casual dating since I was pretty sure anyone I met in middle school wouldn't be with me all of my life. Even in high school, that left a huge period of time where one goes through all sorts of changes in life.
(Note: my best friend is a guy from middle school, and my fiance I met a couple months before we graduated high school. Not to contradict or undermine what I just wrote, but I'm acknowledging the facts. Although... doesn't mean it would have been easy.)
Anyway, I adored the idea of having all my "firsts" with the man I married and having all these common experiences. It works well for me. I know not everyone would agree or prefer this, and that's fine. It's just that, in my little world, it made me joyful. heart
I did wait until I was 18; after almost a year of friendship, praying, and dating he asked me out. I loved him dearly and passionately, and found thousands of ways to make love to him without having any form of sex.
Although we did break up for a period of time... Sometimes I did momentarily regret not sharing such an important experience with him. Then again, I shared TONS of life experiences with him that no one could take away, and I was glad to save the most important to share with my husband (God willing). He was still my first boyfriend/kiss/love, etceteras. I accomplished many of my life goals as well.
Fortunately for the both of us we got back together and are now engaged and I think this decision has worked out best for us. Sex is an intimate thing and for me, I value that greatly.
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Posted: Sun Apr 17, 2005 1:38 am
I guess since I got this guild running, I might as well add my 2 cents too. redface
I'm 18, will be 19 in the summer. I have had 2 boyfriends in my whole life, the 2nd one with whom I am dating now.
I've been sexually active since I was 17, and it was with my ex. I've been on birth control since the very beginning, have been tested for STD's and gotten pap smears, the whole deal. As far as I'm concerned, if you're having sex, you damn well better be responsible about it.
Currently I'm taking Depo, and I haven't had any major problems with it except the first shot (I'm on my 2nd one now) really really screwed up my cycle. Irregular, prolonged bleeding and spotting... bleh. sweatdrop
So I'm hoping that this 2nd shot will be better, and so far so good! xd
I don't regret losing my virginity to my ex as much as I regret having sex with the person he became near the end of the relationship. Being depressed and such changed him, and even though I cared for him deeply, things weren't the same when he broke up with me as when we first started sleeping together, etc.
I'm happy I had all of my "firsts" with him - kissing, sexual experience, PDA, etc. smile I have very few regrets, the only couple being that he broke up with me, and that we aren't really friends now. I really miss having the friend I grew up with, and sometimes I think if I could trade my once-awesome relationship with him to have him back as a friend, I might. I associated so many things with him while we were dating that many things are harder for me to do now. For example, going to church reminds me of him, plus his parents are still there as they're in the choir. Some music and some movies, etc, still remind me of my ex, but I'm working to re-associate those things with my new bf instead of with my ex.
So as I mentioned earlier, I'm currently with my 2nd bf. He shares some of the same interests as my ex, but I really care for him, and he's everything I could ask for in a boyfriend. We love each other, and are very happy together. He's kind, supportive, sympathetic, can quite literally read my mind... he's everything I could ask for in a boyfriend, and he makes me so happy. biggrin
Some people might say "well you've only known him since Sept. 04, that's not very long - you can't love each other." However I'll beg to disagree - I've never met anyone else whom I could feel for this way. We love each other for who we are, and for how we are together. 3nodding even though we didn't date until just over a month ago (at the time of me writing this), we were friends for many months beforehand, and the attraction was always there too.
Sorry for all my ramblings. sweatdrop
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Posted: Wed Apr 27, 2005 3:29 am
I haven't had any personal experience, other than my sister.
She's an adult single mother of two girls. The first guy lied to her, saying he was basically sterile, and the second had a condom break. Both were jerks basically, so she has had nothing to do with them, not even for child support. I see how she struggles to pay for rent, food, car problems, daycare, etc. My parents have to help out a lot. And that is with an adult woman with a job. It must be a lot worse for a minor. True, they have parental support most of the time, but still... It must be so hard for them.
I would really like to prevent anyone having to go through that sort of situation. sweatdrop Though i doubt they would listen to me.
edit: myself, i'm still a virgin and shall be that way for a while longer eek and i really haven't had my own experiences yet sweatdrop
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Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 8:47 am
Wow, this will be a long one. xp My whole basic sexual history. However, that's not saying much.
Lost my virginity when I was.. 16, I guess? To a boyfriend of almost a year. Didn't regret us doing that, but he was.. endowed you can say, and it made for a painful experience. Didn't have sex again with him.
About a year after that, I was dating someone else. He took advantage of me, and it became a rather abusive relationship full of rape, physical abuse, and emotional abuse. After 6 months, I had gotten pregnant. I was 17. I obviously wasn't equipped to have a child, and didn't want to be bound by him. So, I had an abortion a month after graduation. It'll be 2 years this June.
Me being the idiot I was stayed with him for an additional couple of months. All in all, we were together a bit after a year.
Well, a few months after that, I moved a few states away, and was involved with another guy. Was with him for awhile, then I found out he too was kind of a scuzzball. Cheating on me with a bunch of girls and shiz.
So, then I got involved with yet another guy, but that was really only a few months. Now we're just real good friends. xd
Anyway, all in all, I really don't regret anything. I mean, I made some mistakes, but really, everything I experienced has made me who I am.
On one hand, I almost wish I had saved myself, because there is someone I would rather be with now. Wish I could make things more special and all that. But at the same time, I just kind of hope he still cares for me, even given my past.
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Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 10:16 am
My turn I suppse.
Well I don't have much in terms of sexual exploits, I lost my virginity, well about a month and a half ago (I'm 16 he's 19). I don't regret it. Hurt like hell >_< Still hurts (3 times)
Thought this is a good story, he's smarted when it comes to this then I am. (He was a virgin too, even though he was offered, what a guy heart ) So we always use B.C and a condom. Yea, my sister says she wants to have sex as well, shes 16 months younger me and I'm panicking, no offence to her but shes not....responsible enough if she was to get pregnant. It makes it even worse then a month ago she said she didn't know how much longer she'd be going out with this boy O_o.
Anyway back to me. I have minor sexualy experiances, but I'm careful and both me and my boyfriend feel we could be with eachother for mand years to come. ^_^ heart .
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Posted: Thu Apr 28, 2005 3:49 pm
I'm lame. I lost my virginity to my first boyfriend after six months, when I was 18. That was a little over two years ago. I'm still with him, and plan to be for like, evar. heart I've been on birth control the whole time. And there you have the entire story of my sexual life. xd Which I'm pleased as punch with, despite the relative "boredom" of it.
... by which I don't mean that my sex life is boring (sometimes I think it's a little too interesting), but just that I don't have babies popping out or scary diseases or anything. 3nodding
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Posted: Wed May 04, 2005 5:22 pm
My turn! My turn!
Im 17, have been in quite a few relationships, most of which cases the guys turned out to be scum bags, and either cheated on me or used me. My most recent ex treated me like his personal pile of dog poop, making me depressed and addicted to drugs. Thankfully, my friend at the time (now my wonderful fiance) pulled me out of that life, and got me on the right track. I ended up sleeping with an ex, (not mentioning names) and got preggers. My fiance knows that it isnt his kid, but loves him as it is his own. We are getting married in about 2 years.
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Posted: Wed May 04, 2005 9:58 pm
Well I'm 19, boyfriends never really interseted me through out highschool. I had maybe five total I guess. One of my last boyfriends was what you could call emotionally abusive to me and it really screwed me up for a while. After that I dated a friend for I dunno a week or so, but I broke it off to work some issues out with myself. During my senior year of highschool I began dating my fiance, truth be told at the age of 18, I lost my virginity to him after a week of actual dating. It seems fast but he and I had been good friends since middle school when it finally hit us that we loved each other. It was one of those the feelings for each other were always there but never acted upon things. Also to clarify we aren't getting married for at least another 3-4 years.
I like the fact that I am marrying the guy I lost my virginity to, though I don't think it would have bothered me if I had genuinely cared about a different guy and lost it to him then eventually broke up it would have destroyed me or I would have regretted it.
I've been on birth control for a bit over a year and a half, I was orginally put on it because my period never regulated and I got cramps so bad that I couldn't stand for about two days and had to be heavily medicated for the two or three days after just to act normal. It also serves the purpose of helping to keep me from having children at the moment, I do want some in the future but not till after I have graduated college.
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Posted: Sun May 08, 2005 8:29 pm
My name is Kristi Worley. I'm 16 years old and still living with my parents (who are very suportive and helpful).
I have a 3 month old little girl (she turned 3 months old today). Her name is Caitlin Elizabeth. She is wonderful. She is my life! But like many have said, it is hard. It is hard to get up and get her ready for daycare and go to school and go though the every day prosses. I dont think I could have done it without her father and my parents. But it is so wonderful wantching her grow, its amazing how fact they grow up! She is only 3 months and it seems like forever since I was pregnant.
And no, she was not planned! Everyone asks that question and I just look at them like their crazy. Nope, I would have much ratherd finishing high school and some collage first, but oh well.
But thats life and you just have to live with it and do what you can.
My boyfriend's mother kept pushing abortion and I said "hell no" you dont kill a human being, especally your own kid! And then when that was no longer an option His mom and dad were pushing adoption. I gave them the same answer. I could not do that. Emosanally it would kill me. Carrying my baby for 9 months and getting atached to her and everything and then handing her over to some stranger. Thats a no! I told my parents exactly what I wanted and finally they told his parents that either one was an option becuse i wanted to keep her and if they continued to put me under all this stress during this part of the pregnancy I would most likly end up misscarring.
So yes, my pregnacy was hard, but besides dealing with his parents, I had a completly health pregnancy except for the fact that I was 9 days over due. She just dident want to come out!
(if you want pictures just PM me or IM me on AOL IM @ Krisbeth14)
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Posted: Tue May 10, 2005 6:51 pm
I don't think I've had the most healthiest life or relationship with my ex boyfriends. I gave my virginity to my first ex after 6 months of dating. At the time I was only 14 and he was 13. After two years of dating we broke up. Then I had intimate relations with two other guys before realizing that my first ex was the person I wanted to spend my life with. I might be considered crazy but recently, though we haven't been dating I've been sleeping with him. We just went through worrying about whether or not I was pregnant. All the signs of pregnancy were there. About 5 days before my period I had cramps so painful they caused me to cry. We did some research and realized that I had a miscarriage. I'm 16 and he's 15. We're not a year apart, just a few months. It was horrible knowing that I lost my child like that. Not knowing it existed for sure, not knowing that it would be leaving me. I would have rather had an abortion, so atleast I could feel it's presence, atleast I could have felt the creation inside of me created from our love. I know I would have been forced into abortion no matter how much I wanted it, but atleast with abortion I could say goodbye and be more emotionally ready.
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Posted: Mon May 16, 2005 10:49 am
Well lets see
My name is Andrea I have had sex with 3 guys my ex boyfriend was not right for me at all I felt i had to change for him and I felt like I couldnt get away, I cheated on him in an attempt but he forgave me. I then met my Husband I ended up deciding I wanted to date him but i couldnt break up with my ex so i went out with him anyways and we made love, I broke up with my ex that night. One month after i started dating my husband he proposed. He went out of town 4 weeks later i found out I was pregnant (the conception date was the day he proposed heart ) we talked about our options he told me It was my choice but he would stick with me through whatever. We decided to keep and we got married when I was 5 months pregnant, 2 and a half months later I had our son. He had a birth defect that kept him in the hospital, also why he was early. he got to come home when he was 4.5 months old a week before cgristmas. I dont regret any of my choices My son jake is my angel, and I adore my husband. We will be married 3 years on the 18th and jake will be 3 on august 2nd.
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Posted: Sun May 29, 2005 12:57 pm
ok, here goes...i'm 16 & i've only had sex with one guy who is now my fiance, i've never gone out with anyone else & have apsolutly no desire to do so..we were eachother's 1st's & we plan on getting married as soon as i turn 18 ( he turns 18 in July, he's only a year & a 1/2 older though) i love him very deply & don't regret anything, i'm glad we lost our virginity to eachother, & i wouldn't want it any other way! heart 3nodding
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Posted: Sun May 29, 2005 10:50 pm
I am currently 20 years old, and I am in a loving committed relationship with someone who makes me the happiest that I've ever been. Currently, I'm working on a BA in Modern Literature at University of California, Santa Cruz. I am a junior in college now, and I work with all kinds of people at my job in the computer labs.
My sexual history goes as such:
I strongly had a belief that I would not lose my virginity to anyone until I was at least 18. This saved me a lot of problems, as when I was under 18, I got into relationships with some pretty lame guys. Blech. Then, when I turned 18, I started doing research, I went to the junior college in my hometown, and I learned all about birth control pills, the effects, etc. By that time, I was in a polyamorous relationship (well, I had two boyfriends who were exclusively with me), and I got on birth control just in case "one thing led to another." My first time having actual sex was with Marcus, (one of the two people I was dating at the time, and the person I am still with today). I had already accidentally broken my hymen at the age of seven (fell off a chair and did the splits on accident), so I didn't have to worry about any pain at all. It was kind of stressful, though, because even though I waited three months from the first time I started my pills and we used condoms (we had been together considerably longer, and we had been best friends even before that), it was still our first time ever having sex.
It wasn't the most physically pleasurable experience, but it was extremely emotionally gratifying (nervousness aside).
Later on, he helped me through emotional problems with trust (I had been betrayed in a relationship before) and an orgasmic problem, and he was the first person to help me come during sex...(I had never been able to do that outside of masturbation).
I ended up breaking up with my other boyfriend (it was a mutual parting and we're still friends), but I am still with Marcus. He cares for me in ways that I've never been cared for, and he truly has given me the chance to be part of the "give and take" kind of relationship that I've always wanted to be in.
He's 19 right now, and I'm 20, but we hope to stay together for a very very long time *knock on wood*. Now, he's finally transferred to college down in Santa Cruz with me, so we're finally together (in the geographical sense) again! Yay!
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Posted: Mon May 30, 2005 9:50 am
Um, hi. Im 16 year old ( almost 17) and I'm currently in a relationship with my first ever bf. I'm a late bloomer and my Mom's really strict, so I guess i'm pretty old to just start haveing a bf. My frist kiss, handholding, real hug, and back rub? was with This guy..(Tim) he's a year younger than me, but thats because i went to Japanese school for the 2nd and 3rd grade..so i'm a year behind..I dont plan on having sex with him, until at least a year...
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