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 Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:52 pm
Well, looks like you have stumbled upon this wonderful topic! In here you'll find Vic Mignogna's aol away messages which are quite...How to put it? Humorous..Enjoy!
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Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:53 pm
[ Message temporarily off-line ]
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Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:54 pm
If you were a poor Indian with no weapons, and a bunch of conquistadors came up to you and asked where the gold was, I don't think it would be a good idea to say, "I swallowed it. So sue me."
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Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:54 pm
If you ever catch on fire, try to avoid looking in a mirror, because I bet that will really throw you into a panic.
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Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:55 pm
As we were driving, we saw a sign that said "Watch for Rocks." Marta said it should read "Watch for Pretty Rocks." I told her she should write in her suggestion to the highway department, but she started saying it was a joke - just to get out of writing a simple letter! And I thought I was lazy!
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Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:56 pm
If you saw two guys named Hambone and Flippy, which one would you think liked dolphins the most? I'd say Flippy, wouldn't you? You'd be wrong, though. It's Hambone.
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Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:57 pm
A funny thing to do is, if you're out hiking and your friend gets bitten by a poisonous snake, tell him you're going to go for help, then go about ten feet and pretend that *you* got bit by a snake. Then start an argument with him about who's going to go get help. A lot of guys will start crying. That's why it makes you feel good when you tell them it was just a joke.
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Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:57 pm
Sometimes, when I drive across the desert in the middle of the night, with no other cars around, I start imagining: What if there were no civilization out there? No cities, no factories, no people? And then I think: No people or factories? Then who made this car? And this highway? And I get so confused I have to stick my head out the window into the driving rain---unless there's lightning, because I could get struck on the head by a bolt.
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Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:58 pm
Whenever I see an old lady slip and fall on a wet sidewalk, my first instinct is to laugh. But then I think, what is I was an ant, and she fell on me. Then it wouldn't seem quite so funny.
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Posted: Fri Jun 16, 2006 10:59 pm
[ Message temporarily off-line ]
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Posted: Sat Jun 17, 2006 12:54 am
One day I will pretend to be a famous person. My disguise will be so perfect that everyone will believe I am that person. Months later they will eventually find out, but by then it will be too late because, hey, I'm famous now.
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Posted: Sat Jun 17, 2006 8:25 pm
I hope if dogs ever take over the world, and they chose a king, they don't just go by size, because I bet there are some Chihuahuas with some good ideas.
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Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 4:55 pm
If I ever opened a trampoline store, I don't think I'd call it Trampo-Land, because you might think it was a store for tramps, which is not the inpression we are trying to convey with our store. On the other hand, we would not prohibit tramps from browsing, or testing the trampolines, unless a tramp's gyrations seemed to be getting out of control.
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Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 7:47 pm
I wish I had a Kryptonite cross, because then you could keep both Dracula AND Superman away
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Posted: Tue Jun 20, 2006 7:48 pm
I am on the phone right now.
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