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 Posted: Tue Apr 25, 2006 5:49 pm
I seem to have a problem adhering to any one specific system of belief for too long, and I've figured out why. All the ones I've looked at, or, all the good ones anyway(not to say that there are bad religions, but you know what I mean sweatdrop ), hold being peaceable and not causing harm as a main tenet. Now, I am not a violent person, in fact, far from it, but I find it very hard to completely let go of anger and animosity, and I'll tell you why. When I was a kid, in public school(especially elementary and middle), the other kids made sure my life was a living hell. I can't even remember most of my school days they were so bad. This has put into me 2 things: 1, an undercurrent of anger and hatred, and 2, a suspicion of EVERYBODY. There are plenty of sayings to the effect that if you hold on to something someone afflicted on you, you're only hurting yourself further, but that's extremely easy to say, and damn near impossible to enact. Plus, everytime I try to let go of my built up anger, I begin to feel that if I don't keep my "shield" up, I'll be attacked, an effect of my suspicion. As an effect, I find I have a hard time sticking to systems of belief which advocate peace and non-aggression, and so I kind of flip-flop(I suppose it also doesn't help that I flip-flop about everything...). I know this is a lot to unload, but I'd appreciate any and all suggestions. Also, I just needed to unload this somewhere. sweatdrop
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Posted: Tue Apr 25, 2006 6:41 pm
ღஐღ
Ideas of remaining peaceable are all well and good, but I think that they should reflect inner intentions and realizations, rather than be forced behaviours. I would advise you to keep doing what you're doing - being honest about the way you feel, and why you feel that way.
Rather than focus on curing yourself of aggression or suspicion, choose instead to focus on being mindful of when aggression and suspicion arise. Just watch them. Mindfulness is the key.
If peace is to arise in you, then it will arise of its own accord.
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Posted: Wed Apr 26, 2006 3:29 pm
I certainly support the advice of mindfulness.
It's normal for anyone to be split between the form they were born in and the form they wish they were.
I find it helps to realize, though.. that how one is created, whether it be genetic and/or social influence... it's just a temporary thing. Not one's true nature.
(I tend to Zenfully believe that people have to be imperfect to realize just how perfect they are. Yet, if someone thinks they're perfect, clearly they must be missing something. ninja )
So, there's no need to worry about it, since it will fix itself one way or another all in good time. Unless you want to worry about it, of course.
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Posted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 9:48 am
ღஐღ
Kagerou Osajima (I tend to Zenfully believe that people have to be imperfect to realize just how perfect they are. Yet, if someone thinks they're perfect, clearly they must be missing something. ninja )
   Congratulations! You've won this thread!
I love this. Not just your delightfully creative inclusion of the term "Zenfully," but also your presentation of the wisdom that we must be imperfect to see that we're perfect. It's tantra-licious.
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Posted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 5:54 pm
Especially tasty with karma. Domo. blaugh
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Posted: Thu Apr 27, 2006 5:56 pm
Then in fact, haven't we all won? Wisdom passed on is more the better, si? Quote: I love this. Not just your delightfully creative inclusion of the term "Zenfully," but also your presentation of the wisdom that we must be imperfect to see that we're perfect. It's tantra-licious. Agreed. Zenriffic. 3nodding
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