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 Posted: Fri Apr 21, 2006 3:56 pm
I can't say I'm the best poet in the world, but I'll try at least. Leave comments if you have the time.
As night covers day
I walk in the hanging mist
With hair as black as night
I walk in this place filled with death
Night has fallen with gray sorrows
Today the dead are oh so restless
They walk among this land only bones
And among all of them is I
Though I am not like them
I have flesh and blood while they don't
And now I wonder when I will be one of them
Only bones and nothing more
As night covers day
I walk in the hanging mist
With hair as black as night
I walk in this place filled with death
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Posted: Sat Apr 22, 2006 7:34 pm
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Posted: Sun Apr 23, 2006 4:32 am
Thanks for the comment. biggrin
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Posted: Thu May 11, 2006 2:04 am
i like it...its rerally dark and dreary like my room wOOt and i'd just like you to know that if i have time to read i have time to get gold for posting
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Posted: Sat May 13, 2006 2:59 pm
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Posted: Sun May 14, 2006 6:40 pm
I love the mood it creates. Really sets up the mind picture.
Good job. And keep it up. I'd like to see more work from you. ^^
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Posted: Fri Jun 09, 2006 5:07 am
Thanks, everyone. I'll see if I can come up with some more later.
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Posted: Fri Jun 09, 2006 8:17 am
It's good for starters I'd say. The third stanza is a little jumpy. It's pretty good besides.
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Posted: Fri Jun 09, 2006 11:33 am
And among all of them is I
I would say "And among all of them myself"
I'm also not feeling the flow of the third stanza.
Overall I love it. mrgreen Fantastic job!
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