Welcome to Gaia! ::

Dessie had set up in her permitted spot, and boy howdy it was a pain in the a** to keep that permit legal, just outside of a park with a café across the street. It might have been a cool fall day but it didn’t stop her from sitting on her little camp stool with her guitar case open in front of her just strumming on her guitar. She couldn’t be inside any more. She needed to get out and become lost in the flow of people, hiding in the shadows of ‘just another pan-handler’. An invisible. So many people in this city never actually looked around them, even when a person was playing music just feet from them.

The sound of coins landing in the case had her nodding a thanks before shifting to a slightly slower version of ‘Thinking out loud’ by Ed Sheeran. There were some who listened but didn’t really ‘see’. They just enjoyed the music which was fine for the blonde. She just wanted to play, to get lost in the music, but didn’t want to be hiding in her apartment any more. She needed to feel the flow of life around her, even if she wasn’t quite ready to step back into it herself just yet.

“Do you take requests?” Dessie looked up to see an elderly man standing with an equally elderly woman. Typically she would deny it, or ask for something like a five dollar donation, but for them… “If I know it.” When the requested song was mentioned Dessie had to think a moment before nodding and beginning to strum on the instrument. The couple just stood there, looking at each other and holding hands, as she played ‘Your my best friend’ by Queen.

((Just in case you want to listen to them))

The elderly couple left after their song was done, leaving Dessie to decide what to play once again. She didn’t even consciously choose, just started to play a random song, even as her mind drifted. The woman wasn’t giving the people around her any real attention, just letting the music flow even as her heart ached. That was one of the things about music she liked, she was able to express just what she was feeling even when it was impossible to put it into words.

As her fingers strummed the last cords Dessie let out a sigh, pausing before starting another song when a soft voice asking a question had her looking up. Dressed for the weather stood a young woman, a teenager apparently. Some one who still had a bit of growing but was well on their way. It wasn’t hard to tell if you knew what to look for and Dessie had spent way too many years making those quick judgement calls, not that age really predicted personality, or reactions, but it did help some. “Nah, the cords and layout are out there for use if you can find them. I just slowed it down some since,” my mind was wandering, “its a bit chilly out.” The blonde shrugged, then asked curiously, “You play?” Most people who stop to chat are mostly making song requests or asking unrelated questions. This particular person standing there did not, which made her quite the abnormal one at least to Dessie.

((I apparently miss named the Ed Sheeran song, so I corrected my post. I’ve also actually found an acoustic version of Katy Perry’s Thinking Of You so here is that link if you want to listen to it https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jGEE4MZH8x8 ))

“Oh you're fine,” Dessie assured the girl while stretching slightly, pausing only when the other female started to list off all the instruments she played. “That is quite a range,” her head cocked to the side in contemplation before she asked a rather strange question, “Want to try your hand at busking?” She gestured to the instrument.

“I wouldn’t mind a break to warm the fingers if you want to give it a shot,” The blonde explained. She used fingerless gloves that could be turned into mittens since she needed to be able to feel the strings so she really wasn’t lying. Her hands were chilly. So taking a break was actually needed. “I only play here and there when the urge strikes,” Dessie tapped the little cardboard sign that was propped in her guitar case, “I donate everything to the local homeless shelter so I tend to float around as needed or desired. This is just a hobby of mine. It is nice to see others enjoy the music and bring a smile to their faces…” it eases the heart ache, “It makes things a bit better in the world ya know?”

She got up and presented the guitar to the girl. “Here, try it. See if it's something you would like to do eventually as well.”

“Yeah, it's what it's officially called when you play in public for voluntary donations.” Dessie stepped back once the girl took the offered guitar and gestured to the little stool she had been using. “See that is the beauty of it… you will never see these people again so just play whatever you want, however you want.” The older woman shrugged and blew on her fingers, taking this break to warm her fingers up. She knew that while her comment was accurate, those that actually depended on the money generated by their musical skills did in fact care what the public thought. It was one of the safer ways they were able to generate enough money for a meal that day, or even a room for the night. The better spot they could get, the better they could play, the more they were able to gather a crowd, the better their lives would be for a brief moment in time. Dessie knew this well, she had been on that side of the line once upon a time. She had busked and panhandled to make enough to eat that day.

She didn’t have to do that any more, hadn’t had to do it in years actually. So when the urge to disappear into the ‘invisables’, aka the homeless, of the city struck her she went out to play in public, and the money she made went back into feeding those who needed it the most. The shelters scattered in the city, the food pantries, and even directly when able. Dessie used to be out playing a lot more often but life happened and time passed and she found that she had a spot in the world that she didn’t want to escape from. That she didn’t want to hide from… until today. Until the emotions from the last little bit swamped her and rather than face the grief and anger Dessie grabbed her guitar and took to the streets. She just wanted to hide behind the anonymity of being just one of the many on the streets looking for a little money from those who were willing to give it.

Shoving her now warmer hands in her pockets Dessie watched the smile on the younger girl’s face, something easing slightly in her chest. “Just go for it. Play for yourself only and forget about everything else,” she encouraged, a grin starting to tug at her lips as well as the younger woman’s excitement quickly spread. Things were never really as dark and cold as they appeared. There were always little sparks of joy if you knew where to look, it just took another person to remind Dessie of that. It didn’t erase the pain but it did help ease it some. “Play something cheerful. Something to bring a smile to your face.”