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 Posted: Sun Jul 13, 2025 1:02 pm
‘I already tried Baz tonight, so this’s fine…..Jayce won’t care…Baz’ll make breakfast..in like…hours from now? I wouldn’t wanna miss it.’
He wasn’t even sure if Baz was home asleep in his bed, or when exactly Baz would’ve gotten up to make said breakfast if he were? Mostly because he wasn’t often making 3am calls through Jayces window on the bottomost floor. Not when showing up for dinner was far more reasonable….And 1:30 in the morning only got raised eyebrows and open arms and the occasional ‘what you doing here smelling like a fresh bonfire’..…real quiet like…in passing….
Or……
Anytime except for whatever time it was now, when he was likely disrupting sleep routines and making up excuses *not* to: wake people up, use the front door, knock, call, text, summon! Doing none of the above was somehow better in his mind than, gods, he didn’t even know anymore!? He only knew that whatever the hell this was he was doing? It felt better to do it like this! And so he was gonna lie, lie, lie in Jayce’s bed tonight.
One way or another.
‘And now you’re lying to yourself, huh? S’uncharacteristic as ******** helped greatly that some benevolent madman in the sky had heard his furious inner-ramblings and, thank the stars, left Jayce’s window jimmied open enough (Probably Jayce himself, it was ******** hot out in the day n’cooled down at night!) that sliding it the rest of the way up was as easy as cutting butter with a blazing butcher's knife. It only squeaked a little, nothing a bit of WD40 courtesy of a lightly thefted store wouldn’t fix. Maybe even a paid for convenient ********, maybe I can start sending Cerbs over to Todds with a written list, a sack, and some money? Yeah. Wait. No. ********. Whatever! I deserve to have this, I’ve earned it, right? I don’t have t’always have everyone else hold me accountable for my own damn actions…’
Getting the window up was apparently the easy part, leveraging himself up and in; one arm, shoulder, head, the next. A bit of a wiggle and slide. His a** gave him trouble, he swore under his breath about it…
‘I don’t even have to hold myself— not accountable or otherwise. Not at all, so long as I’ve got someone else t’do the holding for me in a ******** manner…Jayce won’t mind…’
He repeated the mantra like a prayer of a man on a mission. That Jayce wouldn't mind, that the questions would wait until after, would rise with the sun instead of ******** up the rest of his evening. Waru murmured as much to himself as he finally, with an oomph, with a louder swear and groan. Shoved himself through the window and face first across Jayces floor.
“Moth-r-fuc–me…”
‘Gods, I just need tonight to end.’
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Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2025 4:02 pm
Really, Waru should have expected Jayce to half fall out of bed, a knife gripped poorly in his hand, and naked save his boxer shorts. The man had climbed through his damned window for ******** sake. Jayce flung himself up and awake as Waru crashed into the floor - taking half the blackout curtain with him - and immediately half joined him on the floor. His lower half was tied up in the blankets, his shoulder pressing awkwardly against both the bedframe and the floor. Well. There certainly were worse positions to be found in.
It was a feat, really, how Jayce put himself in that position, considering the giant Cal King sized bed he slept in. Yet somehow he’d managed it and blinked blearily at Waru, who was face first on the floor. Seeing that it was just his friend and casual romp in the sheets, he put the knife down on the floor.
“The ********>” he cursed, yanking on the sheets to free him enough to complete his fall to the floor. He righted himself and rubbed a hand over his face. A glance at his phone told him it was 3 in the morning.
“Waru, the ******** man. We have a ********’ door,” he said, yawning. He ran a hand through his hair and over his face, scratching at his beard. The other man did spend time in his bed, often in the wee hours of the morning, and Jayce never questioned it. He didn’t need to; usually the man didn’t try to get his fat a** through the window at o’dark thirty in the morning. “Ya coulda teleported in ya know.”
Jayce sat in the darkness, lit only by the starlight and streetlamps coming through the window, and waited.
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Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2025 4:43 pm
‘Bah-bah-black sheep have you any— ‘ He was listening, really, he swore he was. Even as he relented to the tide of curtains entangling him from the waist down, his feet futilely cinched up in swaths of blackout. He huffed in frustration as he rolled half-way onto his back in order to look up at a better angle and see….
‘Wwooowww!!! That's a big knife Jayce has there, or is he just happy t’see me? M’betting he’s happy t’see me…’
It seemed he was able to tell himself anything tonight, anything at all. Like he was doubling down on it, sweet nothings, empty calories. Checks that even his bountiful a** couldn’t cash. Lies so tender there were songs about them!
“Hi….” Short, soft, swallowed. He was still able to sound sheepish, even like this, much to his own amazement. “Yeh..I’d…uh…say that this was preparedness training? Sept for…yanno…how I didn’t actually mean t’wake you…” Waking people was what he’d been trying to avoid! At least in a startling manner? If only he didn’t have the dexterity of a soaked towel. “and…uh…Baz’s probably asleep?”
‘Please let Baz still be asleep!!’
“So…the door seemed out of the question…and the phones...and..…..” He blinked upwards, considering things, gaze dipping upside down to the knife, back to Jayce, back again. He didn’t have anything at the ready for this, no handy phrases tickling the tip of his tongue, only several experiential memories and a few neatly soldered and stitched scars to prove his points, if only to himself.
'Maybe I’ll let Jayce taste one and tell him how I got it? Damn if he’s not cute when he’s tired, but maybe that’s just how it looks from this angle?'
“N’I can say from experience on this one…teleporting into a house unawares just cause I forgot the keys, is as likely t’get me yelled at by several people as it is to get me stabbed by you and them…” He decided to work on shifting his own perspective as he struggled with the curtains a little more, kicked a foot free, reached blindly for another.
“I mean…the accidental stabbing’s probably fifty-fifty no matter how I enter a room? And by a really nice blade by the way! Like, damn? You’ve gotta be packing in all areas, huh?” Sounding relieved as he finally slipped the curtain-monster noose and was able to find a slightly more dignified position, one that left him eating slightly less carpet at the very least! He grinned up at Jayce like he’d just done a neat trick. Like he was seconds away from opening his mouth on to spout enticing innuendos —
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Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2025 5:03 pm
The groan that left Jayce's mouth was deep and long and tired. All this for having forgotten his damn keys good grief… At least the man was hot and flirty. Had he woken Jayce out of a dead sleep? Yes. Did the promise of trying him the <********> out help smooth that over? Absolutely. He stretched, arms over his head and yawned again.
“Yeh, Baz’ll be asleep for another hour or two… unless your spectacular entrance woke him up,” he shrugged and pushed himself up from the floor, offering Waru a hand. He could see the flirts on the tip of his tongue and shushed them with his mouth once the man was standing. It was a tired sort of kiss, with a lazy n** at his bottom lip to chastise him from coming in through the window.
He was awake now, as much as he could be on three hours sleep. A quick mental check of his schedule for the daylight hours had him blissfully free until like four, if he was remembering correctly. At least he wouldn’t be sleep deprived trying to spot someone doing bench press….
“A’ight, spill. What has you all,” Jayce gestured to all of Waru and the window, “like this? Forgetting your keys ain’t it.” He sat down on the edge of the bed. Waru was a lot of things - vicious, violent, amazing in bed - but he felt like the flirting was overly laid on. Like Waru just wanted to climb into bed and pass out and stop thinking.
(Not that Jayce hadn’t done similar after the giant snake fight.)
Buuuuuuuuuut, Jayce also had the sense that something like that was an avoidant behavior, and whatever Waru was trying to not think about, would in fact, bite him - and everyone around him - in the a** later.
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Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2025 5:14 pm
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Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2025 5:23 pm
He listened quietly as Waru rambled through his words, sifting through the not quite explanations and run on sentences. He frowned a little as Waru looked at him like he was a man drowning under his own weight. The weight of his rank, his power, his relationships. The frown turned into one of concern as he reached for him and brought his head into his chest. A large hand buried itself in his dreads and he tucked his chin over Waru’s head.
“Kay, yer avoidin’ him. Did somethin’ happen with ‘im?” he asked quietly into his hair. Jayce was a tad on the outside of the main polycule - if only because there were distinct relationships with Eion and Cassian and Waru - but they also all loved each other in their own ways. Jayce and Waru were casual bros, two sunflowers among the field of flowers. He would always be there for him, and this was one of those times.
He ran his other hand along Waru’s spine, soothing. “Or is it ‘bout Eion?” Their short king was… complicated. More youma than man, with a stomach of fire. Commanding, demanding, and someone Jayce would do anything for. He’d saved him from his useless existence as a knight, burning him from the inside out to purge his connection to Mars. Sure, Metallia had provided the power that hummed in his veins right now, but Faustite had been the one to put it there. He’d been the one to shove his hand in his chest and hold his soul in his hand.
Nothing was as intimate as that experience.
He kissed Waru’s temple softly. “Cas loves ya, ya know that right?”
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Posted: Mon Jul 14, 2025 10:47 pm
“Not yet…” a bemused snort softened by the close proximity, the urge he had to be derisive stroked out of his spine by a large, comforting hand. Gently crushed down in a pleasant enough way that he didn’t feel like kicking and screaming about it. Not tonight. Not here. Not when he could just be held while Jayce was speaking so, so, sweetly soft.
‘Not when I know better—‘
It was still nice though, wasn’t it? To be asked the question sincerely, to have a chest broad as his own to shrink up against, feeling small by choice, safe by proxy. All curled up within the strength of Jayces arms and in his bed. Beloved by someone who didn’t arguably owe him anything. It was easily won camaraderie, reciprocated freely as a smile.
There were no strings with Jayce — no landmines easily sprung — no hidden traumas to trip over in all his foolishness —
Least, nothing that couldn’t be easily patched the morning after? It was never too hard, he’d found. To chase off Jayces demons, to let the gentle giant of a man reciprocate. N’Waru thought he certainly didn’t deserve him, sometimes. In moments like this? When he was left wondering if he’d ever told Jayce exactly how pleased he was to have the man by his side? How greatful, for every second beyond the physical, the death defying, sexually smitten!
Here, holding him, his and his alone for a little while longer—
Because he knew better, and yet? It was all the knowing that made it harder still.
“N’it’d be easier if it was just about Ei?” Oh, if he could only pin this all on his boy; blame all the antics he’d been up to on his flaming loves namesake. A nice, clean, scapegoat. Already cooked, skewered, divided on the spit. But Waru found the mere thought of turning Cassian’s former husband, eternal flame, and forever partner against him rankled sour. Even now, when it would’ve been easiest to do?
But no, his issues were his own and his choices were his own. If only it were as easy to own it all aloud as it was to do so privately!
“Cause Cass loves me, yeh…” The brush of lips was a surprise, he closed his eyes to it, heaving a breath more shuddery than the prior one. “But I don’t think he’d be happy with…uffh…any of this?” It was fine to curl closer, right? To listen for the steady thrum of pulse that rode loud alongside Jayces heartbeat. “I haven’t told him…any of it..nothing.” Gods, how did he explain this?! “..…s’no fault of his that m’too tired to try n’have whatever fight I’m afraid it’ll turn into?”
It wasn’t Jayces fault either, or his burden, and yet? Waru found himself staying put, indulging in the blunt nails against his scalp, the easy rhythm of breathing Jayce encouraged— with rock meeting stream energy — and nothing more. Jayce wouldn’t buckle under him, he was made of sterner things, was spartan strong and fire signs. Always.
“The way m’not handling *any* of this s**t well…“ And where was that knife when he needed it? “The reasons why I’m present…but not here….” His teeth sinking over his lip but not staying any longer than to catch the bit of flesh and release it.
“He’ll think he’s not enough. He always does. He’ll ask me why? Why you, and Ren, and Baz—“ He didn’t know how to explain how untrue it was. That Cass alone was everything. That so too were the others! “Why Everly or Adam?” That it wasn’t even about sex half the time! And sometimes not at all?! That if he was dragged thin it was his own doing! “And I never can explain it right...if I explain it at all….the way I need more n’I could ever ask any one person to give. What all of you mean to me?” He doubted he was explaining anything correctly even now, all the ways the people around him were too precious to let go by anything but the slowest of degrees.
‘If I ever let them go at all— if I suddenly don’t need them? Even as friends?!’
“And? It’s not like Eions dead — he’s just — gods…“ He’d run out of words for the state of Eion (or lack thereof), and found it easier to stop cold, and skip the subject entirely. Flustered with himself, afraid of where that line of thought would lead.
It was a live wire and didn’t need touching — not when there were thirty others he could fry himself on.
“N’Cass alone has always been enough. He is. But he’s still hurt, and I’m not helping him the way I could when I was in a better place, and even when I wasn’t? He still deserves better than my worst day, kay? Better than me…..going to strip clubs…and lighting up the city like m’calling t’gondor....and…” The next huff became a growl of sound that sat stuck in his chest, prowling the cage of his ribs.
“It’s me that’s the issue —“ as close as he could get to an honest to god's whisper. “It’s me who's failing him— and I don’t wanna fight about it anymore than I wanna deal with…uh…”
The realization came, that maybe he’d finally said too much? Blinking at the slightly brighter, curtainless gloom. He found himself swallowing around a pause, waiting for some other pin to drop.
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2025 8:40 am
He waited for Waru to go quiet, and then some before replying. Jayce took a breath, and looked out of the window to sort out his thoughts. He’d always known it was casual between him and Waru. They were bros who sometimes released stress between the sheets. He’d never asked for more of Waru than that, given Eion and Cass being in the picture. Jayce never questioned it, because he sort of assumed - perhaps, stupidly - that Waru would, you know, explain it to his husbands. Or that it was alright.
Granted, Waru had always struck Jayce as kind of a whore so the fact that he was sleeping with the majority of the team wasn’t like, a surprise to him.
A long sigh rolled out his mouth. “Ya know, ya usually ask yer partners if it’s okay to casually romp in another’s bed, ‘ight?” he said with a slight shake of his head. Jayce moved, pushing Waru gently back into a sitting position and turning the man to face him. He placed his hand over Waru’s heart.
“Waru, ya need to talk to Cass. ‘Bout all o’this. Ya are just gunna hurt ‘im worse when he finds out from someone other than ya. An’ he will, eventually,” he said, fingers resting where he’d normally sink and touch a soul. “Ya need to lean on the rest of us, too. We ain’t dealin’ with Eion bein’ – whatever he is – any better. Have ya seen Kiri lately? I ain’t ever seen her so damn… quiet. Wha’bout yer kitty, HayHay? M’point bein’, we all ain’t the same since fightin’ that damn snake. So maybe stop runnin’ from yer team.”
He pulled his hand back and ran a hand through his hair. He wasn’t great with relationships or relationship advice (apparently he’d left some twink of a boy when he corrupted based on old photos on his old phone) but it seemed to be so much more than that. A mess, really.
(He was gunna have to think about the idea that maybe his sleeping with Waru was not actually acceptable once Waru was not in his bed. And maybe with some liquor.)
“Ya gotta stop runnin’ from ‘im Waru.”
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Posted: Fri Aug 01, 2025 8:54 am
“I’msorry–” Quick rush of words wrapped in barbed feelings, as if he could fix it by opening his mouth; take it all back like the next breath of air he sucked in, before he was swallowing back down all the words that wanted to come up, listening more closely than he dared to. He felt struck for a moment, looked it, too. As he was forced to sit back and come to terms with a terribly piercing sort of clarity, that of all the people he maybe had asked at one point? Had run through the layout and labyrinth of his inner and outer workings—
That he’d forgotten about Jayce in all of that, disrespectfully so. Jayce who was always up for whatever, down for a good time, full of ******** *sense* for all that the man was built more densely than a dark star. Able to put him in his damn place with just a hand over his soul. And that, in doing all this, all his bullshit, he’d not once come to Baz for permission to invade their space like a stray when the mood struck. Was he taking advantage of the endless breakfasts? The easy hospitality? The way both men seemed to live to serve? They did it like it was easy, they opened their home, and their arms….they were such good to him when he wanted anything but….
Baz with all his care…..Jayce with his gentle firmness.
“It was easier before…..Eion got it…n’Ren always knew I ******** this..…” He huffed softly, for all the ways he’d never planned anything with Cass to go the way it'd gone, not initially. That he would’ve been content for the indigo-haired man to never have looked at him twice, or with anything less than disdain? Who knew a ‘divorce’ and Eion’s absence on missions would’ve spurned him into turning the whole ‘lets be friendship’ up to eleven!
He’d just wanted Cass to be happy…
And Emmy didn’t want to know, so long as it didn’t endanger her. Adam didn’t ‘care’, so long as he and the man fulfilled that mutual need within each other blanketed by a thicker than Waru ever wanted to admit layer of strange-ways friendship.
‘Because I’m an unrepentant hypocrite sometimes—’
“That's not…none of it’s an excuse…I shouldn’t make excuses…” His heart ached beneath the warm patch Jayce left on his skin through his shirt, like it’d beat out his chest without the other man holding it there. His lips gently parting around attempts to state the obvious, ‘Because you’re right’, he wanted to say. ‘Because I do know better–’, he didn’t even mention Tama, or Trey. Didn’t try to save face when confronted with the state of Kiri – of his poor Haybaby – and he wanted to suddenly reassure Jayce that he wasn’t some unknown trespasser in this. That he could’ve never been! That Waru chose him for more ********’ reasons ******** when it’s…so…soo ********’ easy t’just…” A sudden soft sound from above – or was it just out in the hall – and Waru found himself choked up and sobering nigh’ damn immediately.
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