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 Posted: Fri Feb 07, 2025 8:09 pm
((Back dated to late December)) Aelius slept fitfully. The effects of the shower lost to the cold sweat that covered his body. He fluctuated from being so hot that he kicked blankets off of him, to being so cold that he curled up within the mass of mish-mashed fabric like a mouse in its nest. His cough had only grown worse and to be honest, the boy was miserable. Everything hurt from his ankles all the way to his head where a dull throb had started. The black, blue and green bruise from his initial capture stood out starkly on pale skin. The cuts down his face and the bites on his neck were an angry red against his complexion.
Aelius curled onto his side having just woken up. The blankets were pulled up to his neck as he dipped his head into them for a racking cough that left him groaning at the pain in his side and throat. He burned so hot, but refused to kick them off right now and deal with the cold air around him. Better to burn up than freeze. Perhaps if he had more on beyond just the sweatpants that Faustite had rummaged up for him, but the air bit at his skin in a too familiar way. Hazily he glanced around for the warm fire that denoted Faustite’s perch, but found the room lacking the flickering light. He was alone in the darkness. Likely left to sleep on his own letting his caretaker some time to himself. Aelius couldn’t blame him.
He drew the covers tighter to himself as he nestled his face into the pillow. More coughing and wheezing accompanied his attempts at drifting back to sleep, but slumber was blocked. Being alone in the room bothered him in ways he couldn’t explain. The room seemed to mock him with its quietness that was only broken by his need to expel whatever the ******** it was in his lungs. Gods, he hated this. All of it. How weak and pathetic he felt. That he had needed Faustite’s support so much. His inability to just relax in a space by himself. All of this because some Order bitches had somehow gained insight to his personal life and took action. Just 3 nights worth of their neglect and abuse led him to where he was.
His thoughts spiraled in circles as he weakly pulled the blankets off of himself. He couldn’t stay still. And despite how he felt, he was ******** determined to not stay in the quiet of the bedroom. That determination had him scooting himself to the edge of the bed.
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Posted: Sat May 17, 2025 6:06 pm
Waru had rarely worked graveyards, full twelves, back to back sixteens. His lifestyle didn’t lend well to it now. His attention span hadn’t before. All the jobs he’d gotten, the kind that required that sort of round the clock dedication; cheap security, camera-watcher, staff at a storage place. Odds and ends gigs that he’d kept long enough to get a single paycheck form before drifting out of being employed for it like a passing ship on the sea.
His resume was likely an HR nightmare — it was a wonder he hadn’t ever ended up in actual jail. Which had ******** all to do with this, save for how coming ‘home’ after scrabbling out pitch black, dreamless hours of run-on sleep at Sys place (because Syrus looked shitkicked, and ornery, and they were both stubborn enough to put the other down. Especially with Aramis in tow as resident kindly nag.)
It felt like trading shifts, tagging off countless hours for countless hours, and he truly had stopped counting. Not only because it was his specialty, but because the days of blissful darkness had blurred into one seamless moment filled with the sort of cold hands around his heart paranoia that left him waking feeling like he’d hardly slept at all; swearing, sweating, panic edged. His breakfast more hurried than the shower Sy had demanded he take with hissed notes while remaking the bed, and Waru had only listened because he didn’t want to deal with the headache of an argument that he knew would come from picking that kind of meaningless fight. Not when he only wanted to get *gone* and needed to text Faustite that he was coming back expeditiously—
Home. Home. Home.
Three days late. But home!
He knew Sy would be fine after all; even if the blond was a little bruised up in both ego and body. If anything? Waru thought it did the super good to have gotten his delicate hands dirty over something as important as this. An earned moment. Probably just as earned as his startlement, bamphing into the whore-home like he expected it to be mostly empty; for the occupants to be out, or down for the count, or some combination of both—
In bed and deeply asleep and well fed and cared for!
Not Aelius, looking weak and wide awake, freshly served through several layers of hell, up and getting around when he should’ve been swaddled and laying down; cleaner, bandaged. All the most egregious wounds and marks handled in ways that screamed both ‘hospital’ and ‘husband’ to his eyes.
Aelius wearing his godamned sweats of all things—
Only his sweats and nothing more by the looks of it, a blink-worthy moment. Not that Albite was looking all too hard as his heart leapt into his throat at seeing Aelius properly for the first time since before he’d been taken, he wanted to ask where Faustite was — finally asleep — run to the office knowing he was meant to come back? Knew that his husband’s whereabouts would matter three seconds *after* Aelius’s did.
“Yanno— I expect this kinda thing from Ei. He hates bed-rest like I hate clothes—“ Albite huffed a hoarse declaration, clearing his own voice as he clawed into his own confidence and approached the bluenette with outstretched hands, looking like he didn’t know where to hold Aelius — where it was safe to touch — the poor boy, unglamoured and ill, looking swallowed against the backdrop of the bedroom; too big pants and pooled blankets.
“Where we goin’ Aelius?” Instead of ‘I miss you’, or ‘I love you’; because the boy looked like he wanted to move if it’d take fighting the laws of physics to make it happen.
***
When the door opened Aelius stared at the man shadowed within the doorway. It took him a moment for his addled brain to understand and react to Waru’s arrival, and when it did, Aelius began coughing profusely at the small gasp of surprise. He half fell, half plopped back onto the air mattress that squeaked a plastic protest for the abuse. The boy didn’t hear it though as he wheezed and attempted to catch his breath past the coughing fit.
“Waru…” His voice was raspy from lack of use. He paused to try and clear it up, but the scratchiness of it never fully abated. “No where.” It wasn’t a lie. He didn’t know where he had intended to go. Perhaps find Faustite and curl up somewhere in his presence even if it was on the damn floor? Or maybe downstairs to find something to keep his mind off of how miserable he felt. A flush would have slipped across his cheeks if one hadn’t already been there denoting the fever burning in him. “Don’t want to be alone.”
HE hadn’t really been alone for so long. Not really since Waru had moved in with him. Then there was Beans too once she managed to worm her way into Aelius’s heart.
Being alone in that cold house, hurting and miserable had hit home how much Aelius wished for someone to just be there for him.
Then, coming back to the team house and waking to find himself alone after Faustite had been so close to him the past…however much time it had been, Aelius couldn’t cope with the loneliness. Some may chalk it up to the age-old joke of men being useless when sick, but it was more than that. At least to the boy who had been stuck ailing from so many hurts and a sickness that was effectively wrecking him.
So, Aelius sat there on the edge of the air mattress, leaning forward with elbows on his knees to support himself as he looked up at one of the few people that he’d ached to have at his side. “Are you feeling better?” He vaguely remembered hearing that Waru had spent an enormous amount of time looking for Aelius. It was comforting to know that but he hated to have put the man through such a trial. “Sorry ‘bout all of that.” He coughed out weakly.
***
His flinch for the first cough was instinctive, the way he darted forwards to fill Aelius’s space on bent knees so that he could look into the other boy's glassy eyes properly. It was a reaction as ingrained as a mother lurching towards a child's cry, because sick was never just ‘sick’ down here. All their invincible will, unkillable youth, fiery spirits. How rarely those things faltered in the face of greater odds that would’ve killed weaker men and women. How it never seemed to be the physical *wounds* that kept anyone he loved down, no. Those things could be *healed*, he’d seen it done how many times? Seen blood replaced, bones knitted, magic bend time and space back from a point of ending.
A whole lot of questionable bullshit, but who the ******** was he ever to complain about what littered a field in the aftermath of a moment, or seeped into his glamored suits, just so long as the people those pieces were once attached to – that had bled that blood and lost those limbs and – so long as they seemed to suddenly be whole after? He never looked too hard at any of the horses he’d been gifted. He wasn’t about to start with this; not with Aelius looking a weak, raspy, ruin of marks that hadn’t faded nearly enough for his own liking.
Not with their boy sounding so, so, so ******** sick–
Because Aelius wasn’t bug proof (none of them were, and ******** if he’d ever actually believe Faustite was again!) and it was always the little stuff. A side-effect where one shouldn't've been, a viral failing in the thread of life run red, and black. Always spelling death with hacking, haggard breaths and fevers that couldn’t be put out with any amount of water or prescription of drugs. Sickness – the kind that festered and ate at bodies until they looked terribly starved and barely hanging on with the rest of them.
Waru swore he wasn’t panicking— except Aelius kept opening his mouth; to spill soft confusion, to hitch through more coughs. Waru swore he didn’t want to shake the boy, even as he stared on with absolute shock that Aelius was asking about *him* of all people! Thinking ‘Such an absolute sweetheart ’ and ‘he’s going to be the death of me’, even as he reached out to touch the barest parts of Aelius’s skin; gritting his teeth to find them hot.
“Am I – are you?! Jezzus, Aelius…” Blown out in a sigh as he reached to swipe sweaty purple strands back from the mans face and, ******** – pointedly – not stare at Aelius’s neck ********** NO! No. “First? No apologies.” Because he couldn’t take it and if Aelius started now he’d want to argue and what good would that do either of them, really!? “Second? We’re gonna get – just – everything we can into you t’help bring this down…you’re so hot….” He tutted, like a man trying to call a herd of chickens down at the same time as he ordered his own thoughts. “Third? Your wish t’not be alone’s about to be sooo ******** granted. I hope you don’t mind having a partner hovering over you while you piss till…hell…till I feel like not hovering, actually? So theres that.”
***
He started a bit as Waru rushed forward to crouch in front of him. He wanted to offer a reassuring smile at the worry etched in the other mans face, but instead what he gave was just a tired half smile before needing to turn his head away with another cough. The last thing Aelius wanted was to share whatever the hell this was. Thankfully, it wasn’t one of the breath-taking fits.
He let Waru fuss over him. The coolness of the other man’s hand had the boy leaning into the touch just a bit more. It felt so good against his feverish skin and comforted him having Waru so close in proximity. Just like when Faustite was around, Aelius was calmer.
“Sor…” He went to apologize again as Waru began throwing terms out as a hand rose up to cover the marks that those warm, brown eyes trailed to. In such close proximity it wasn’t hard to miss the flick of the eyes and where they went. “Right. No more apologies.” He agreed as his thumb grazed over the bite marks that was on clear display. It let the wounds dry out and scab over.
A scrunch of a face spoke volumes for how much he thought about being pumped with medicine. Knowing Waru, the man would go to a pharmacy and just grab anything and everything he could taste be damned. Still…he needed something. “Don’t even know what it is I’ve got.” He confessed with a wheezing sigh.
“Faustite attempted to help cool me down a few…” hours? A day? Several days ago? “I don’t know when, but the shower was miserably cold.” He felt worse since then. Whatever it was he had caught had definitely progressed in that time.
At least something good was going to come out of Waru being here. He’d not be left alone. As much as he felt guilty for stealing even more of the man’s time, he was so incredibly grateful. “Just…be careful and take care of yourself. We don’t need you getting sick too.” The chances of Faustite catching whatever it was Aelius had was slim, but Waru? Waru was as human as Aelius and also susceptible to whatever this was.
Another coughing fit. This one forced Aelius to twist away from Waru and face the bed as he let it work its way out. Fingers gripped at the blankets there as his other hand supported his injured ribs against the abuse. He sucked in a breath once the fit was over. It took him a few moments before he felt he could finally turn back to Waru. “That wouldn’t be so bad if it didn’t hurt so much to cough.”
***
Much in the way he feared for Faustite whenever his boy was especially cool, he too feared the heat roiling off of Aelius' skin right now. It felt to him like the beginnings of a horrible domino effect that'd already begun, somehow both ominous and irreversible in nature. Unless he intervened somewhat drastically—
At least that was what he told himself as he winced on Aelius’s behalf for the way every wracked cough must have pulled at the boy's scabbing wounds, the scar that bisected Aelius’s face. And as the last little fit subsided, his building anxiety tore free, became motion; the urge to pull Aelius back towards him once he’d caught a breath, close and close and closer still. To pull the man straight into us arms like a far slighter bride than he was and stand with him rather abruptly.
‘Aelius is going to hate me for this—‘
He told himself he’d apologize later; would spew up every single one of Aelius’s withheld ‘sorries’ as though they were born from his own throat and always meant to be his. He’d apologize his tongue off, for jostling Aelius with his next steps, for causing hurt while seeking to heal, for rambling while he did it.
“It’s really not fair, yanno?” He murmured absolute nonsense, let his subconscious thoughts come to the fore, loudly so. “To do this s**t to me,” petulant hurt, a trapped whine as he stole Aelius through space and back into the very bathroom the man’d moaned about hating moments ago. “To make me love you, and then? Go and get yourself half-killed without anyone’s ******** permission— “ The words blameless, without bite, full of longing and some hidden urge to undo all that had been done.
“T’get a concussion too, on top of everything else. Cause you must have one t’forget that we’re not alone in this, Aelius. Not in how I care for you. S’not just gonna be me n’Ei — though if we’re who you think you need lost right now?” He sighed as he gingerly set the boy into the tub? Sweatpants and all. Thinking absently about the number of people he’d let close — that he imagined Eion would risk being here? And oh, it was a small and cloistered group. But he thought of Jayce, and Everlee, and Trey. More than enough to help and exactly the right people for the jobs he had in mind.
“It was the one thing that made life bearable when things got bad for Ei, yanno? Knowing it wasn’t all on me — that you were there for him — and that he could go to Cela or Haru — or even Trey? And I remember you being jealous back then…but I realize now it was maybe because you didn’t get to see *this* part here…the side of things where the world is overwhelming, ********’ crushingly so? N’the blessing it is t’have a team who can carry that weight when you can’t anymore…” Said with fondness for knowing that having others to lean on meant he didn’t need to leave Aelius for anything, that there were capable people he could call on in the interim to get s**t done. That anything he couldn’t ask of them? He could do himself the second Eion came home and they traded Aelius off like a dutiful couple trying to hatch an egg.
“Speaking of…I’mma be getting hold of big bro. Gonna have him air-drop us some ******** necessities....shits either viral or it isn’t…but if we can get you cooled down enough that we don’t have to go back to the hospital?” Using the words as bait and lure, a carrot to dangle in the hopes of easing Aelius’s potential ire as he lowered the sweats-clad bluenette into the tub with as much gentleness as he could possess. He wondered if Trey would’ve kept Aelius there longer if he could’ve? If the elder dragon would’ve forced a point for Aelius’s betterment. But gods knowing Eion wanting Aelius sheltered away within the secluded confines of their little whore-home; that s**t outside of where they were was beyond compromised enough, that the idea of secreting Aelius away here to heal made sense even to him.
Someone had sold Aelius up a river and until they knew who—
Well, that just meant the threat could be anywhere, right? Even nice sage hospital rooms dressed in nurses clothes. What were the chances that they’d do it again if they let their boy slip back into society too soon? It was better not to think about it as he set the tap to a middling warmth, to not stare overlong at Aelius wounded side as the tub filled — he needed to be texting Trey — and maybe getting Aelius something to change into because what little the man was wearing was going to soak through — and —
“I’m sorry, by the way.” He said somberly, half draped over the tub's lip as if he was hedging climbing in with Aelius himself for extra security. The point stood that he wasn’t leaving yet, that his limbs would hang and his fingers stay touching — to clock the water's warmth as it rose — to check the rise and fall of Aelius' chest4 hovering as though he were ever-waiting to steady the boy. As if he couldn’t stand to move away, not just yet, not for anything. “For all of this— everything that happened — nearly losing you…“
***
The sudden shift and moving from bed to Waru’s arms and height took the man by surprise. He sucked in a small breath as he shifted, instantly exasperated and embarrassed that Waru had felt the need to carry him. But, Aelius also knew that protests would fall onto selectively deaf ears. Waru was full on into mother-hen mode and nothing was likely going to deter him, not when Aelius was very much at his mercy if he wished to keep the man around. And he very much wanted Waru to stay around.
And if he was honest with himself, it was kind of nice to have Waru’s attention like this. Just like it had been nice to have Faustites.
“Right. Cause I made you.” He said, leveling a look at the man as he lamented about the woes of having fallen for yet another person. “I’ll make sure to consult you next time.” He rasped out as a small attempt to keep humor between them and alleviate Waru’s worries.
If he could have, he would have shifted uncomfortably in Waru’s arms though. “I am not used to it.” He said as he coughed softly. “Having others to rely on. It’s…I struggle.” And it was no lie. While he would do his damn best to assist members of the team, relying on them to help him was putting too much on them. He didn’t want to be a burden and already he’d gone and gotten himself into enough trouble that they needed to bail him out. But…it honestly wasn’t fair of him to expect Waru and Faustite alone would shoulder his stupidity by just themselves. They both deserved their lives, time, and peace. So, he kept his mouth shut at the mention of his brother being asked to bring in supplies. If there was anyone else he was comfortable with it was Trey, even if he still felt disconnected with his brother at times.
When he realized where Waru was taking him, Aelius practically groaned and laid his head against the other's shoulder. He looked at the tub with dislike before he was carefully deposited into it, sweatpants and all.
“I don’t have anything else to wear.” He half whined, half groaned as the water began filling the tub, and Waru slung himself over the side like a discarded towel. The damage was done though. It hadn’t taken long for the water to begin soaking the fabric and he shivered for it.
He was about to remark about Waru’s lack of attempt to get him out of his pants when the man began his own foray into apologies with heavy, brown eyes and looking all like he wanted to drown himself in the water with Aelius. “If I can’t apologize you can’t either.” A soft remark. Lifting his hand he reached out to Waru’s face, cupping the man’s cheek and chin. “I am here. Safe and sound because of you, Faustite and the team. I…” He paused as he began coughing again, groaned when he was done but continued on with what he was saying. “I’ll be alright. It’s just going to suck for a little while.” Again. It was going to suck again. Aelius wasn’t under pretenses that the journey ahead for him, beyond healing, was going to be uphill. There was a lot of work to be done, but that wasn’t something he could even wrap his brain around at that moment.
If he knew he wouldn’t likely share his illness, Aelius would have gladly lost himself in one of those breath stealing kisses of Waru’s. His eyes hoovered over those lips as he dropped his hand to his side.
“I think you and Faustite like torturing me.” Shifting himself up a bit as he began sliding, Aelius bemoaned the water’s temperature. He knew it likely wasn’t as cold as it felt, but it brought on another shiver as goose pimples ran over his skin.
***
He wanted to argue that, every bit of it. To explain how he hadn’t answered Aelius back right away, how he’d lost time, lost track, and if he’d just called the man immediately? Or texted him straight back? If he’d done anything faster?! Like gone to Fauatite first instead of Trey or— But it was a moot point and his own butter pill to swallow. He knew Aelius was right for him not to dwell on that sort of thing here, not aloud, at least.
‘Maybe once things are quiet — once he’s tucked away and asleep, and then —‘ and then he’d send a flurry of texts while tracing Aelius’s new and precious scars with soft eyes, from within the pit of their recessed bed. Why the boy hadn’t been tucked away in it was beyond him, but knowing Aelius? He wondered if even half-dead and delirious the bluenette had fought against imposing on he and Eion somehow —
“I’ve been told it’s part of my charm, yeh? That I’d make a very sweet dungeon hand. Some people would even thank me for it — the torturing part.” He huffed softly, the barest hint of a smile for Aelius’s despondent whine over sweats that had seen far worse than a little soaking. Though? If it was the lack of anything to wear after that the man was truly worried about? He resolved to fix that issue as the tub slowly filled, adding clothing to the growing list of things he’d ask Trey to bring him; loose things, easily discarded or changed in and out of. He wondered if Aelius would protest overmuch to being shoved into a nightgown? Maybe a button-down type — a soft robe with a zipper — something for the olds who had poor circulation. He was sure the fashionista in both men would cringe at the thought of Aelius’s temporary new wear, but his mind was fixed doggedly on ease of accessibility above all else.
And buying out a whole pharmacies worth of drugs—
Not that he was worried about Trey making his requests happen. He’d like to see anyone, anywhere, deny an angry elder dragon. If it was a mark of pride or a mark of love, maybe some barbed tangle of both for the older brother? Waru didn’t question it, the fervor with which lit Fafnir and drove the man to get s**t done. He could only sit in awe and be grateful he’d never *truly* pissed Trey off in any of the ways he’d ever thought he had.
“I’ll never get over how much Trey cares about you—“ Reaching for that dropped hand with his own as he spoke over the sound of water rising past Aelius navel, up his bruised sides, his cheek warm from the touch. Waru was near greatful for the way it obscured the otherwise bright bruising over the other man’s form enough that he could let himself pretend it was exactly as Aelius said ‘not so bad’. “That Muri thought to take that kinda risk for us…knew he was a keeper…glad we let him go...”
He blew out a sigh as he eventually had to squeeze that hand and shift free, just enough to cut the flow before it drowned the poor boy and spilled over all the sides. Reminding himself that he simply wanted Aelius soaking long enough to get cooled down and little more. Gods, it’d been how long since he’d had someone sick like this who could actually catch a legitimate fever? He’d almost forgotten what it was like to do this kind of thing.
“And you did, you know. Held me practically at gunpoint by seeming like you wanted to knife me, but looking like you needed a hug. It was that ******** day in the park…How everything new about you caught me by surprise, and what was I supposed to do with myself then?” He chuckled at himself, sucking on a better memory than this moment like hard candy. “I was so tempted to tell you to stay that next morning, to ruin the shoot. Heh, to ********’ stall out the night before rather than risk losing your friendship —“ He realized he’d had far less inhibitions, the prolonged time of close proximity, practically living in Aelius back pocket and finding that he liked it to some degree, for moments when it was good.
“I kinda had a moment like that with Faustite too, yanno? Our first kiss— it was over pear ipa and orange slices instead of tea and Chinese. I almost didn’t let him leave— ” The memory was fond, and though his words were there his mind clearly wasn’t. His gaze lived in the present, glued to Aelius’ chilling skin, to the marks he could see, and it was better maybe to fix worried auburn on the panda shadowed gold orbs set just above a fascinating new scar. “—But I had to. I always have to.” Whose hands had done it? What blade? He wanted names and he wanted to touch and he wanted Aelius to breathe less miserably.
“Whether or not it’s ever what I want.” He worried sometimes he looked like a man collecting expensive, shiny marbles. A hoarder of exceptional loves and quick pleasures. Always chasing experiences, always filling over the old and empty with the new and exciting; like fresh groute lining the hungry cracks of his heart. He wished he could’ve explained himself better, given substance to his desires, sworn that he wasn’t just falling into a warm and willing bed every time. That it was somehow more — that sometimes — with some people — it was more. He thought of how Aelius had gone about earning it, and demanded his patience. The similar existing parallels of the people he cared for and how what they demanded of him made it all the more easy to care.
“Because there’s nothing safe about any of this — if this isn’t proof?” A flicker of water droplets from his fingertips as his eyes dipped over the obvious and he briefly wondered if Aelius would tolerate having his hair washed. “But you are safe now…s’true. And? In case you were wondering, you’re still ********’ pretty — just — handsome as hell, Aelius. If they were tryna ruin that? They failed.” He said warmly, said that instead of asking what they’d wanted to do — what they’d done — later.
He could ask later.
***
The water lapped at his fevered skin as the healing wounds on his ankles and wrists reminded him of their existence with their mild sting. Eyes drifted to the wrist of the hand he’d been touching Waru with. The ugly, cauterized and bruised skin was still obviously angry for the abuse it had endured, and as Waru had noticed, were only a few of the marks left on him physically.
The mention of Trey brought a soft smile to Aelius’s face. His brother, while cloyingly overprotective at times, was too good to Aelius. The younger brother was well aware how good he had it with Trey. “Trey can be a lot at times, but I appreciate him. Probably more than he realizes” His only lament was that they didn’t see as much of each other as he’d have liked. At times, Trey seemed like a stranger thanks to the years that passed both of them by.
“I still stand that Muri looked better in darker colors.” Though, Aelius wasn’t going to fight that fight. If Muri hadn’t been purified to order, what were the odds that he’d have both found, and felt obligated to inspect what was going on in that house? If he hadn’t, where would that have left Aelius? Likely, dead. Another soul lost to the war, his starseed returned to the cauldron like so many of them had wanted. He’d have left behind people like Waru, Faustite and his brother who had no clue what happened to him. Or worse, his corpse utilized as a tool against them.
No, he had a lot to thank Muri for and it was more than his own life.
Gods, he would have hated so much to hurt the heart of the man right in front of him too. Especially with how Waru looked as he explained when he fell for Aelius. How he nearly valued their friendship over what could have been more. That confession had eyes widening. Aelius had always felt Waru was very easy and loose with his affections and sexual endeavours, but the hear that he’d nearly put a halt to it all because he cared enough about their friendship spoke volumes about the relationship they had built. Aelius’s heart skipped within his chest. “I am glad you didn’t stall out.” He squeezed the man’s hand as it dipped into the water to his own.
And then to hear of how he and Faustite had started, a story he’d yet to hear, painted an ever brighter picture of the man next to him. So much self restraint and respect for those he coveted. An absolute well of caring and love while completely self sacrificing in such a respectful way.
Aelius stayed mute as he processed it all. Eyes watching the man as he both doted on Aelius and continued to tell stories and explain himself.
As those dark, warm orbs found their focus on the healing wounds, especially the one on his face, Aelius’s brows furrowed slightly and he tipped his head in an attempt to hide the nasty rew, raw wound that was already promising to leave its mark. Waru’s sugar sweet words, while good in intention, didn’t ease the anger and despair that Aelius felt for the marking of his visage. He tried to forget the wounds existed, all of them, but there was no way to ignore something that required his attention and care, or to be reminded when he instinctively looked in a mirror while washing his hands.
He’d been so lost in thought, that Aelius hadn’t realized he’d begun to shiver slightly. Only when the tensing of his muscles finally reached those that were battered, did he realize his full discomfort. How high is my fever? Perhaps he was worse off than he thought? Still, the cool water would help if he could tolerate it long enough.
“I think there’s fresh bandages in the bedroom. I took a lot of them off when I started sweating. It didn’t seem smart to leave them on.” Maybe it wasn’t the smartest idea but Aelius wasn’t a medic. He had no idea which was better or not. He had just felt uncomfortable and the ones on his neck and face had peeled off during his sweaty fit of sleep.
More coughing had the water sloshing around him as Aelius shifted himself up a bit more to better accommodate his body’s need to expel whatever it was in his lungs. He tucked his head into his shoulder away from Waru, covering his mouth with a hand as he let the cough work its way out of him. When done, he sighed and eased himself back against the tub. “I survived capture to be laid low by a damn illness.” A groan.
He turned back to Waru, eyes taking in the man’s face, stopping at those beautiful warm eyes. “So, tell me more about you and Faustite? When did you know he was special to you? Enough to make you want to marry him?”
***
‘Then tell him that—‘ Waru thought fervently, and kept the words a thought alone. He’d meddled with the brothers affairs enough that he wasn’t about to say it aloud, instead he simply hoped when Aelius next had the chance to tell Trey? He would, and use the chances he’d gained in surviving to make sure his older brother knew. Not just the once, but all the time. Waru thought they’d earned some semblance of happiness, even with a distance of years between them. The fact that he couldn’t get the look on Treys face out of his mind— the horrid realization that Faustite couldn’t summon their boy back from wherever he’d been taken—
‘I hope Trey makes up for lost time — I hope he gets pushy with it — I hope Aelius takes more chances on the family he has while he has them —‘
“I hadn’t been planning it, yanno? But then you got that phone call….” He remembered how they’d been talking so earnestly, how he couldn’t recall Aelius ever having such an interest in him before. That it was the most attractive the boy had ever been; openly curious, eating and smiling, seeming unguarded enough to talk about himself in turn. And that had Waru finally seeing what he thought must have caught Faustites interest all those years ago, the confidence their boy claimed he missed so much about the bluenette, but a far simpler kind than he felt Aelius realized he still had within him; sweetly inquisitive, brilliantly intellectual. “….and it suddenly felt like the conversation would end and then we’d never get that moment back.”
So he’d grabbed for it with both hands, tipped the scales recklessly, because he’d always roll for risk when the potential for loss sat across the table from him. It was such a ridiculous fear to harbor, the moments he’d lose and the people he’d lose with them—
Yet it gnawed at him, ruinously so, and with any other group than this? Amongst any other breadth of blessedly understanding people? He knew it would’ve cost him dearly. How he’d gotten so ******** lucky was beyond him, and he could only think of it that way just so long as he didn’t ask after the others opinions on the matter overmuch. If his actions hurt them after the fact? Then it was one more thing for him to make up for, wasn’t it? And if it took a lifetime, whether or not he knew how to do it properly…
He wouldn’t regret the chance to do even that.
It was Aelius asking the impossible that dragged him out of his ruminations, the way he had to give the boy his own wide eyed look, one that softened immeasurably so, that Aelius would ask something so intimately about a relationship not their own, when he’d always professed to not want details.
“s**t, how high is your fever actually—“ half tease and half serious as he dragged a soaked hand over Aelius’s forehead, daring to press a kiss there in its watery wake. He’d teach him not to turn away later, would show him the worth in giving him his face. But that was all for another time. “How about this? I’ll wash your hair real quick while I tell you…” Lifting himself to sit on the edge properly and tend to the increasingly uncomfortable looking man with gentle swiftness.
“And the second I’m done? We’ll get you stripped out of here —“ he hummed as he planned on getting Aelius into a dry bed, with clean sheets, and the remainder of some pain killers. If he didn’t have any left over from himself and the team's many trysts with danger and sharp objects? He probably had some in that kit….
“Dried off — dressed out -- rebandaged up — put to bed — you were smart to let the wounds breathe a little, and…man…you’re really sure you wanna hear about that?” Carefully hopeful, eager to tell, but not so eager as to forget all of Aelius' carefully drawn boundaries. It was one thing to run his mouth in blissful ignorance, to speak about his other lives as an accidental anecdote; to paint a scene in order to cover for all the words he lacked. But he could feel the heat leeching off Aelius skin as he gathered the boys hair at the nape and prepared to pull soap and water through it; a mild two in one that he could finger comb through the sweaty tangles that’s formed in Aelius’s rough sleep.
***
Aelius smiled tiredly. “Well, thankfully it did anything but stall out.” He reached a hand up to brush a stray dread of Waru’s. Not that the man’s hair was long enough to dip into the water, but it was something tactile, something that was a piece of Waru he could touch for a few moments. He hadn’t thought about the fac that his hand was wet but thankfully, Waru’s hair type was the kind that was almost hydrophobic. He twirled the dread in his fingers a bit, before releasing it, dropping his hand back to the water with a small splash.
Waru was…gods, he was more than Aelius deserved and the chilled, soaked boy damn well knew it. But, he was so solidly ensnared by the man, that there was no hope of Aelius wanting to let him go. Yes, he got frustrated. Yes, his jealousy spiked horrifically in knowing that Waru was with others. Like Faustite, Waru had very much fallen into the category of his. His to love and dote on. His to be with and love. It was…somewhat frightening how swiftly Waru had gotten himself up and under Aelius’s skin. But, looking back, it was pretty obvious that while, yes, it was swift since they’ve finally stopped denying themselves, it was not at all a quick endeavor if Aelius was willing to acknowledge when his first interests in the man started. It was just before Faustite’s near youmafication. So long ago now it seemed. A year? 2?Probably closer to 2 if not over. Such a long time and they’d only recently, within months became the couple they were. There wasn’t really a definition of ‘them’. Aelius hadn’t pressed the issue and was happy just existing with what they were.
He’d fallen into a bit of a tired daze. Even if the cool water was uncomfortable, the fever and cold was enough to exhaust him. Add on to the fact that he was shivering and Aelius was quite ready to fall back into bed to pass out. So, while he heard Waru’s words about the fever, it wasn’t until those warm lips pressed against his forehead that Aelius stirred. “No. I don’t want you getting sick, Waru.” His words were whiny, but held no bite to them as he shooed the man from his face. “Seriously. I promise you don’t want this.” The offer of a hair wash though….
He sighed. “Yea. That will be fine.” Aelius knew his hair had to look like a damn rats nest with how he’d tossed and turned in bed while sweating. As Waru better positions himself by perching on the edge of the tub, Aelius shifted himself as well so he sat more upright. Of course, as he moved he coughed again. His lungs unhappy with the change of position.
“Bed sounds.” He coughed some more mid sentence. “Wonderful.” He finished his coughing and groaned a bit at the rawness of his throat and pain of his ribs. But, he didn’t complain. He was safe and being taken care of. What was there to complain about in comparison?
Golden eyes settled on Waru as he leaned towards the boy just a smidge. As much as he wanted to rest his head against the man’s hip and a**, he refrained. “Yes. I want to hear. If you’re up for telling me that is. You don’t have to if you’d rather not.”
***
“I felt crazy,” it was worth laughing at now, looking back on the moment through the safe lense of time gone past. How some sensations stayed sunk deep, even through the filmy barrier of a glamour. There was no washing the memory of that moment out of his head, no matter how hard he tried. Not for his own sake — or Faustites — no real way for him to set it all aside like it hadn’t happened when he damn well knew it had!
“Cause I’d damn well seen him die—“ With all his senses; tasting ice, ozone, and brimstone while bathing in the concussive aftermath of the towers explosion. “But no, apparently not. Because there he stood — alive — surrounded by Ceros, Lysi, Kama and Tae. They were all picking up the pieces, taking care of each other.” A bewildered snort lined with silvery mirth as he tugged with careful fingers the mass of Aelius’s hair back behind the boys ears, behind his head, taking the incline of closeness as blank-check permission to have his way.
He would’ve rather Aelius rest fully against him, but if the bluenette was going to be stubborn about distance and catching germs? We’ll, all the more reason for him to take advantage by administering a little well deserved tlc before the water turned a temp more punishing than it already must’ve been for the boy.
“And the look on Sylvite's face, on her team’s? When I woke up in her arms and opened my mouth to say some insane s**t and they corrected ********, like I was begging to get in line for a padded room…and it was ******** priceless…” He couldn’t imagine it from their end, how he’d asked after Faustites *pieces*, and there must have been pieces! Nuts, bolts, black-ichor viscera. But only for him, apparently. What with how they’d all turned their heads collectively, like a flock of owls, and pointed out the proof of how wrong he was in breathtaking technicolor. Oh, the wretched feel of the universe slapping the very concept of rightness out of his head.
Because Faustite was alive—
And he’d missed between one blackout blink and the waking next, the ******** *how* of it all. Things that shouldn’t have been, yet inexplicably were. He’d decided that night that all magic was some sublime bullshit, and that Faustite was maybe a god.
And that he loved him—
More than intrigue, curiosity, and hot-monster-boy literally on fire. He loved him. And if he wasn’t worthy of it? If it was unrequited? A foolish pining that would yield no returns? Well— ******** if his single, concussed braincell or too-swollen heart cared. His love was never centered around what he got out of a thing so much as it was all about what he could pour into it. Even a cup as cracked, charred, and boiling to the touch as his boy.
“He’d always been special to me I think? From the moment I met him.” Lather, rinse, repeat, the thoughts out of his own head poured into Aelius’s ears like the lukewarm water and a handful of him-smelling shampoo. “But I hadn’t been clear on it. Not clear enough, at least. Cause I flirt like I breathe, you know this! But love? S’harder t’pin down..comes in all sorts of forms…I never catch it the same way twice even when I do…never express it the same for damn sure....” Careful attention paid to the nape, to where he scritched blunt nails over Aelius temples, down, back. Hoping in some small way he was bringing the other man some relief.
“It shouldn’t have taken him dying for me to realize….and there was all this regret…me longing for the little things? The way he made his tea, the glow of his eyes, the way he stayed on my mind even when he wasn’t around. I didn’t ******** know Eion, not really—even though I’d kissed him once? And let him walk out tasting like ale, citrus, and sweets.”
He didn’t know Eion— a form of fleeting moments and a few hours on leashed ends. He knew Faustite though, loved Faustite, had watched *Faustite* die; flame-wreathed, smoke-haloed, a ******** temper and a tease! A b*****d for taking Tae first and telling him about it like it Ei’d expected him to rile up over finding out Firewhirl’s had gotten under his Firebrands false-skin first. He hadn’t found reason to, and Hell? Why hiss over humanity when the core of what he would’ve lived and died for was Agni and ashen-skinned.
When it was Faustite.
Always. Always. Always.
'He was all I'd ever known.'
“But—gods—that ******** showed up on my door as ‘Eion’ weeks after the fact, without so much as a call or a word otherwise…looking small in thirty sweaters....apologizing to me for dying…” He sneered at something distant, cupped water over suds-streaked hair, careful to try and keep it from Aelius’s eyes. “It wasn’t even ‘Eion’ that I was wanting…wasn’t him who I’d watched die...or fallen in love with…and I think that was what really did me in, honestly? The realization that I loved him so damn much, but hadn’t ever once said the words. Having ‘Eion’ in my house and wanting Faustite, still. Even though they were kinda the same ******** person.”
Kinda being a cop-out of a word. Because the two were different enough to him — a chasm of not-same between one set of metal and another of bone and — let the world have Eion. Let them have his soft skin, and rich curls, and gentler hands with blunt nails that couldn’t cut for s**t.
‘I’ll have the rest, call it mine, brand the word into my flesh and cauterize the feeling forever.’
“But if I could’ve stripped him out of his skin that night; down to steel, fire, and tiny little bolts.” He hummed, wondered if maybe he was some fifty-shades of insane? Because he knew how he sounded to others at least some of the time! Same as he knew he would've preferred to have done it long before he’d stood back and watched Eion shed endless layers like a perverse nesting doll.
“I would’ve done it, Aelius.” Soft and honest as the dawn that never quite came to their part of the world in the team house. “Because I loved him, because he was mine. Had always been mine from ‘go’. I’d just been stupid about it.…I realized that the second I stopped being so cautious about treading on his feelings, and started being honest about my own…enough to stop panicking about snuffing out his fire…n’make him quit worrying for my flesh…” The conditioner got combed through with thick fingers, not allowed to set nearly long as he was sure Aelius’s hair needed. But the water was getting cold, and telling Aelius how he’d neatly lost said wedding ring after — brilliantly if you’d asked him — hiding it in a bath-bomb….
What a ******** it’d been to learn thqt Faustite was actually a green mineral? And that amethyst was rather fire-resistant — and he’d proposed late — not right away — and —
But that was a whole nother journey. Ten other tangential roads far away from the here and now of Aelius’s needs, stories for later.
“So….t’get to the point? He was always worth marrying….the rings ******** like an appendix? All — sentimental and pretty — n’kinda useless for how the real meaning is a deeper claim n’that. But also, as a Senshi? It’s kinda hard to promise ‘forever’ in a way that means it the way I want it to, especially when all we might have together is right now.” He didn’t know if Faustite would live forever, or have descendants the way velvet did? Or —
Or if his boy would keep dragging him back the way he’d begged him to. No matter how many faces he wore in whatever lifetime he showed up in.
“But m’all about binding, yeah? Having that physical anchor…proof that none of us are dying alone. We weren’t meant to.” Of that he was certain, a steel to the way he insisted on it, even as he was wringing the tail of Aelius’s lengths into murky bath water and snagging a large enough to fit himself and so surely Aelius towel.
“Not him.”
And his boy had a collection of anchors — circles of hearts — they glinted with different weights, would last the years, or not.
That wasn’t for him to decide.
“Not you, either.”
No more than it was for him to agonize over Aelius’s pair, dangling off a simple chain. One for another. One for the only; twined, clinking flames that he dared not traipse over ********.
“C’mere—”
He’d promised Aelius a dressing down, dry towel, clean bandages, and a warm bed. If he had to bully the other man into letting him share it? To express his gladness for Aelius being alive the only ways he knew how; by being a briefly overbearing mother hen of a himbo? Then so be it. He only hoped Aelius would forgive him this intimate kind of trespassing.
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