December 30th, 2024 (Back dating to the 17th)
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Cardinal Companion (14) : In the dismal whites and blues and greys of winter, the bright red splash of a cardinal is a welcome difference. It’s not uncommon to see birds out and about, and it’s easy to spot these especially after a fresh snow. Wild birds typically mind their own business and don’t really care about you–except, this one does. An unusually curious cardinal finds you the subject of interest in its day, and oddly enough–it feels familiar to you. You can’t explain it, but the moment your eyes land on it, it feels like coming face to face with someone dear to you. The cardinal isn’t afraid of you and feels comfortable enough to approach you, or maybe even land on you. Perhaps it’s even brought you some small gift. The more time you spend with it, the more you pick up on its unique habits, which seem to have an uncanny resemblance to someone you’ve lost. Sometimes the cardinal even smells of them, or has similar traits. The cardinal doesn’t ever stay for long but when it leaves there is an undeniable feeling that someone very important to you has paid you a visit.
The morning had started off like any other morning for Kinsey, making breakfast for himself and readying himself for school while his step mother simpered and fawned over her youngest child. Kinsey did his best, as usual, to ignore the gloating girl and did his very best to ignore his coffee drinking father. The man didn’t like breakfast and preferred downing a cup, or two, of coffee before heading off to work. It wasn’t until an hour or two later that he’d actually eat, if he ran on the same schedule as he did when Kinsey’s mother was still alive. He could still remember his mother scolding his father, always in a gentle and teasing manner, about him skipping the most important meal of the day. His father would brush it off, claiming it was too early to shovel food down his throat, and off he’d go to work after a goodbye kiss to his wife and some words of encouragement to Kinsey.
No words came this morning, and there was no teasing either, there was chatter about the table though but Kinsey was not apart of it. He was never apart of it, unless he was being blamed for something or ordered to do something. It wasn’t until after his father had left, and he was preparing to leave as well, that his step mother told him the family was going out to dinner tonight and he was not coming. He was to remain home and mind himself, no getting into anything, she would know if he got up to any sort of trouble. It was all the standard stuff that he was long since used to, it always was, so Kinsey just gave her the usual response as he shouldered his school bag and headed out the door.
A hand stuffed into his pocket as he started on the long walk to school, it would take him a while to get there, but the air was nice and cold and felt good when he breathed in. Air swirled around him as he breathed out, pale eyes looked around taking in all the snow and the dead trees. It really wasn’t much of a sight, a shame really, it wasn’t until a splash of red grabbed his attention that things became a little less bleak. It was a cardinal, they weren’t the most common of birds and often took off almost as soon as they were noticed, but this one was watching him and hopping along a fence as if following him. It wasn’t a male bird, that would be a lot more red than this bird possessed, there was a lot of brown with small spots of red - a female cardinal.
Watching her hop along the fence, amused over the sight, Kinsey continued on towards school as kept sending glances towards the bird who followed him as he continued on his walk towards school. It was just as he was reaching the school gates that the bird decided to take a short flight and land on his shoulder, pecking his cheek even, his fingers reached out towards the bird and finding it allowing Kinsey pet its feathered head. What an odd thing…so sweet….almost like how a parent would walk their children to school and see them off at the gate. His mother used to walk with him to school, rather than driving him to school, and would see him off at the gates to the school yard. His father had never done such a thing, not even when the man had a day off work, it had always been time for mother and son to bond and him to get an impromptu lesson in Norwegian from his mother. She would always teach him another word, or two, or even quiz him on what he’d learned the previous day. It was always something, even small conversation, the walks to school were never boring. “Mamma?” Questioning, because there was no way, he didn’t believe in things like reincarnation or these sorts of things. He’d heard people say stuff about butterflies being a family member watching them, or a deceased family member leaving heads up pennies for them in places, people seemed to believe in these sorts of things. It had always been something he’d shake his head at, or roll his eyes at, but now this bird had his attention as he pecked his cheek again and seemed to nod its little head.
“O-oh…ok.” He wasn’t sure how to respond, as the bird very much seemed to understand what he had asked, this little bird certainly wasn’t behaving normally so maybe there was something to this? Was this what other people saw? He very much doubted it, he felt like other people just imagined it all, but this was real right now…he was certain of it. Scuffing his show on the ground, unsure how to proceed, Kinsey found his voice coming out choked. “I have to go….ummm…I miss you mamma.” Holding a finger to the birds feet he let it hop onto his finger before moving the bird to a nearby tree, watching it hop up onto the lowest branch, and hurried quickly to class before he lost the hold he had on his emotions.
Throughout the day Kinsey was a closeted emotional mess, and it was that bird's fault, every time he looked out the window of a classroom he’d see that bird. Whether on a window ledge or in a tree near a window the bird was there - always. They were watching him, their head turned his way each time he looked over and saw them. He wondered if the bird did anything else throughout the day as they seemed to be spending the day haunting him. Rather than stay after class, because it was starting to snow rather heavily, Kinsey intended to walk himself home and hole himself up in his room to do his homework and read. If he locked his bedroom door he’d be safe and alone to do as he pleased, no one was going to take the time to pick the lock to his door, and today that sounded like a good idea. As the bird flew over and perched on his shoulder he turned his pale eyes onto it. “You’ve been following me all day.” A tweet was the response to his accusation, not that he expected much else from a bird. The walk home was silent, save for the occasional word here or there he’d utter, sometimes in Norwegian, it was when he reached the front door that the bird seemed to rouse itself on his shoulder. The little bird cocked its head, looked about, fluttered its wings and puffed its chest before pecking his cheek and nipping his ear, right under one of his earrings, before taking off.
Watching it leave he cursed softly and turned to head inside. Maybe, just maybe, people weren’t crazy when they claimed a butterfly was a family member watching over them. He’d never admit it, never say it aloud, but maybe.
Word count: 1,179
