Despite how many weird things Jeremy had seen, some days he woke up and was still astounded by the sheer mass of it all. It wasn't just that now he was waking up in his own bedroom, in a nice house. It wasn't just that there was an alien living with them. It wasn't just that his brother was a Senshi.

It was a little bit of everything.

Usually, he was the first one up in the house. Well--if you excluded the fact that sometimes the other members of the house didn't actually sleep. Today, it was almost nine and he still hadn't gotten out of bed.

Myles had probably had a late night, maybe being a Senshi, maybe making candles. He hadn't heard the sound of something being dropped or bumped into so he knew his brother hadn't made it out of bed. Jeremy had gotten in a little after seven but had forgotten to give the Opal Star Charm to Myles as promised. He was regretting it now; the sun had risen just enough that it was now reflecting off of the charm and blinding him.

It was hard to stay in bed when a miniature flashlight was boring into your eye sockets.

A rainbow reflection coated the wall and ceiling so he knew Myles would love the charm. He squinted at it and thought about how much Myles would probably like pancakes instead of the shitty sugar cereal he ate every morning but Jeremy hadn't figured out if he had the stamina for such mundane things.

It felt weird to be thinking about pancakes when there were aliens around. When there were youma, and Negaverse agents.

He'd dreamed about boxes again. Tight spaces. Rising water.

Jeremy hadn't woken up from the nightmare like he usually did but he didn't know if it that made it better or worse. When he woke up from a nightmare he was usually panicking. Not that he would admit it--not to anyone else or himself, but he could at least find some way to tell himself that it wasn't a dream, it wasn't real.

Even the real thing hadn't been that bad. He could trick himself into thinking about how fake it all was. How silly it all was. He didn't have to think much because he had emotions and he could dismiss those the same as he could the ones that came from watching a horror movie.

He didn't have that now.

On the plus side, he didn't have to deal with the headache, the tightness of his chest, the boiling blood, the panic.

On the negative, he had to think about it.

Even after all of these years, Jeremy didn't really have a solid grasp on it. He didn't talk about it, what was there to say? How do you explain it?

He didn't bother trying.

He didn't know why today, why now. It wasn't the anniversary of it. Though, it was coming up.

...

No, anniversaries were for celebrations. Not things you tried to forget.

Nothing particularly bad had even happened recently. No brushes with death. No stressing about finances, or Myles, or whatever was going on in the department.

Life seemed good. Consistent.

Weird, but not unpleasant.

The sound of fabric splitting tore him from his thoughts but he didn't even realize that he'd plucked a hole right through the threads of his sheet until then. He hadn't realized he'd been worrying it so much until then. Impressive, given that he'd already done it four times in last month for the same reason.

He ran his fingers over the frayed fabric thoughtfully.

That was weird, too.

He felt jittery, like he'd had too much coffee already. Maybe today was a decaf day. It couldn't be a stay in bed all day kind of day, Jeremy didn't have those. Myles would worry too much if he thought he was sick.

The house was still silent. Maybe Jeremy could have gone back to sleep but the walls felt closer than they had been a moment ago.

His whole body felt heavy. He ached.

He wondered if his phone still had those messages he recorded back when--

Well, it didn't matter. The battery was probably dead. He'd thrown it in a drawer and hadn't pulled it out since Soleiyu made him a new phone. A better phone.

One that could send and receive messages through rock and steel. He hadn't found a single place in the city that didn't have full bars yet.

Jeremy didn't quite have a headache but there was something heavy in the back of his mind.

A plastic bowl clattered to the ground in the kitchen and he heard Myles' muffled noise of alarm.

It was enough to chase away the heavy fog of thoughts Jeremy had been nearly humoring. For now.

Something unfamiliar clattered, and though it was softer than the bowl it was still easy to tell that Myles was having a hard time this morning.

Jeremy looked at the star charm by his bed and listened to his brother scurry around the kitchen with the grace of a bull in a china shop.

He had a reason to get up today. Especially because today was already off to a late start. He had a lot to make up for.

No time to think about dreams when he had such a long list of things to do.

He'd start by checking in on his brother.