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 Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:45 pm
Quote: The Meteor Shower (3) : It wouldn’t be a star festival without a meteor shower! Right on time, a beautiful array of shooting stars graces the night sky. This time of year is unnaturally clear and it’s incredibly easy to see the stars. Most meteor fragments appear to be little white or yellow lights streaming across the sky, but if you watch closely enough you may find that some of them seem to be a whole rainbow of colors. The scientists have reported that it’s just different components burning up as they enter the atmosphere, but there’s something undeniably magical about it.
Tonight, the world seemed quiet. There were no youma nearby that Yvoire could sense, nor any other spots of Chaos. Their corner of the park was peaceful—a bit darker away from the streetlights, but not so much that they couldn’t see each other.
Sometimes it was better in the shadows. Yvoire could look up and watch meteor fragments streak across the sky.
“It’s pretty,” he said—a little quiet, a little shy, the way he always was on Earth. He sat on the ground with his knees drawn up to his chest, arms wrapped loosely around them, tipping his head back to get a better look. His hat slid out of place, falling further down the side where the large bow and flowers made it heaviest.
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:46 pm
The sky was pretty, and he was glad he had a chance to sit and watch it with Yvoire that year. So much had happened that it was difficult to keep track of things. They’d continued to make progress on their Wonders, of course. They helped others fighting Chaos on their worlds, although how helpful they were was still up to debate. They helped get rid of creepy isopods that were infesting an otherworldly museum.
“What happened?” he asked suddenly as he looked over at Yvoire instead of the sky. He’d laid back into the grass, his hat off to the side. He was careful with his arm, which was still painful at times but at least it was healing. Reims made a face when he realized he’d asked out loud.
“I mean… I know you lost your dad, but you’ve never really talked about what happened. I mean… not really.”
Okay, that still sounded weird and insensitive.
“I was just thinking… if I -- or any of our friends -- knew more about what happened, then we’d be able to, I don’t know, keep an eye out for each other better during crazy things with Chaos making us think horrible thoughts.”
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:47 pm
Yvoire tensed—not at the question, which he initially thought innocent, but at the mention of his dad. He dropped his gaze but didn’t look at Reims, then dropped an arm too and plucked a few pieces of grass from the ground, shredding them between his fingers.
“I never—... I don’t remember mentioning—...”
Maybe he hadn’t, outright. He knew he hadn’t, not to anyone except Ganymede. But Reims had been with him on Daedalus, and it was there that Yvoire had seen… something. Or nothing. A ghost, or a memory, or a dream. Real enough to talk to, but not lasting enough to make a difference.
Yvoire shrugged because it was easiest, because he didn’t know what to say but had to fill the awkward silence with something, even if it was movement instead of words. He picked at more of the grass, shredded each piece, then found a patch of clover and shredded that too. Yvoire swallowed the lump that rose into his throat. He glared at the ground like he could stop his eyes from growing hot and wet.
“Does it matter?” he asked, voice a little thick, a little raspy, wavering when he wanted to sound strong.
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:48 pm
Reims winced again. He was looking forward to having a relaxing evening with Yvoire. Just hanging out. Talking about nothing. Or anything. Evie probably hadn’t expected something like this.
When Yvoire mumbled, questioning when he might have mentioned--
Reims felt his ears burn. He also couldn’t remember Yvoire saying anything about it, but he knew from school. He’d heard enough gossip, one way or another. People weren’t exactly shy about talking about things, but didn’t know how to offer sympathy.
Which meant Riker picking on Énna was even worse because he hadn’t been thinking about that at the time.
“I think so. He was important to you, yeah? Does it hurt to talk about him? Or is what happened too unfair…?”
From being on Daedalus, he’d heard a little from Yvoire, although not anything specific. He knew emotions were heavy, and… they’d both been pretty helpless. Reims knew Evie’s dad had died, but he had a feeling that there was more to it. He’d seen how passionate Evie was about fighting the Negaverse, yet he would rather curl up in a quiet corner around their friends. He didn’t want to assume but… it was difficult not to.
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:48 pm
Yvoire didn’t want to talk about it. He didn’t even really want to think about it, but he couldn’t stop that even when he didn’t have anyone asking about it.
Reims wasn't trying to be cruel. He wasn’t trying to pry either. Or maybe he was prying, but only because he was curious. Maybe because he cared. There wasn’t anything malicious about it. Yvoire almost wished there was. Then he could be mean and tell Reims to shut up and mind his own business and never ask about Daddy again. Maybe he could’ve thrown dirt at him and shoved him away and stomped off to make a point, instead of sitting here quietly trying not to cry.
It hurt to swallow. It hurt to breathe. It hurt to do anything at all, so Yvoire tried to shut himself off. If he went blank, maybe he could get it over with, and then Reims would know, and Yvoire wouldn’t have to discuss it again.
“He went jogging one night and never came home,” Yvoire said, toneless, like the words came out on their own without much input from him. “He was in a coma when he was found. No one knew how or why, just that it happens sometimes, and two weeks later he was dead.”
Yvoire thought about Stirling, and the agents they’d harassed trying to get her starseed back.
He wondered if anyone had known Daddy, if they’d tried to do the same for him.
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:48 pm
Slowly, Reims pushed himself up to sit while Evie was trying to decide whether to say anything or not. He almost apologized. Almost told him to just forget he asked. But he was curious, and he suspected and he couldn’t help but want to do something... anything that would be worthwhile and help Evie start to heal.
Because the more he got to know him, the more damaged Evie seemed. More than just being quiet around the others, or passionate about fixing his wonder. He just seemed closed off. Maybe Reims saw a bit of himself in him.
He didn’t say anything when Evie finally answered, and it was just as bad as he’d suspected. Evie didn’t have to explain what he thought might have happened. They both knew.
Part of him regretted asking, because he didn’t think he of all people deserved to know the truth. Deserved to know something that Evie held onto very carefully so he wouldn’t let his heart break further.
For a few moments, Reims just looked up at the sky. And then he reached out to gently place his hand against Evie’s back to rub. It made him sad. It made him angry.
“He didn’t deserve that. You didn’t-- … I’m sorry. That’s bullshit, and I’m sorry.”
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:49 pm
Yvoire shrugged again.
He knew he should try to accept the sympathy. He should be grateful that Reims cared to know, and to look out for him. He should maybe even feel touched that Reims would at least wait until they were alone, instead of asking him around everyone else. He should feel reassured that Reims didn’t make a big deal about it, that he offered sympathy without making it feel like too much.
Yvoire hunched in on himself. He shut his eyes for a moment, put his forehead against his knees to block out the shadows and the swaying trees and the meteors streaking by overhead. When he was younger, he would’ve tried to make a wish on them, or at least he would’ve thought about it, even if he couldn’t let himself believe that it would come true. Now he knew that for sure. He’d tried on Urania, and all he got for his efforts was a ghost on Daedalus telling him to rest, to give up.
“When we were trying to help Stirling, I was angry,” he said into his knees, “because we didn’t know how to help Daddy and it didn’t seem fair—” Yvoire stopped himself. Took a breath. Swallowed again. “It’s not fair that we could save her, but Daddy died. I almost—...” A pause to lick his lips, nervous, ashamed. “I’m glad Dering got it back for her, but I was mad about it too, because why should she get to live when Daddy didn’t.”
He felt ashamed for saying it, ashamed for thinking it, but relieved now, too, to have gotten it out there.
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:49 pm
They’d just met Stirling that night. Most of them had met that night. Everything had been thrown at them all at once, and at the time it seemed like the only right thing for them to do. They still didn’t know Stirling very well, but she was Dering’s friend, and she seemed to be friends with the others. He and Yvoire were kind of the odd ones out in that regard.
Hoping it wasn’t too much, Reims inched a bit closer to Yvoire while he was hiding against his knees, and wrapped his arm around him, as though trying to give him even more of a place to hide if he wanted it.
“I, uh… don’t have that close of a relationship with my family, so I wouldn’t really know how I’d feel if something happened to them. But if it was you who’d died? Someone I really liked and cared about, and then I was dragged along to try and save someone else that I didn’t even know? Yeah… I get it. I’d be angry too. It’s not fair.”
He could feel the tension in Yvoire’s shoulders and could only guess that he felt guilty for thinking that way, but Reims didn’t judge him for it. Nor did he blame him. He just hoped that Stirling understood the gift she was given -- a second chance at life, and to not waste it.
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:50 pm
He hadn’t thought Reims would judge him, but it was nice to have confirmation. Yvoire didn’t think he would ever admit it to any of the others, especially Dering, but it had hurt to keep it in. Even if Reims didn’t really understand it, at least Yvoire didn’t have to hide it anymore.
He didn’t uncurl, didn’t lean into Reims. He still sat tense and awkward, swallowing convulsively and trying not to cry, because even if Reims wouldn’t judge him for that either, Yvoire still hated being emotional. He didn’t like that he was quiet. He didn’t like that he was shy. He didn’t like that he felt awkward, that he couldn’t be confident, that he still got hung up on things that happened years ago.
As if anyone could ever actually get over something like that. Yvoire certainly wouldn’t have judged anyone else for behaving the same way, but… he hated to cry. He hated to feel like he was falling apart and couldn’t put himself back together.
“Sorry for—” He stopped to take another breath, seemed to reconsider what he was saying and shook his head. “I don’t really want to talk about it. With the others. I don’t want people to look at me like—like I’m—”
Weak? Strange? Spiteful? Yvoire didn’t know what he meant to say. Everything felt too raw. He couldn’t find the right words.
Maybe there weren’t any.
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:50 pm
“You have nothing to apologize for,” he promised, giving Yvoire’s shoulder a little squeeze. He didn’t pull him closer, but he still wanted to give him a chance to hide if he wanted it.
“I won’t say anything. Thank you for telling me.”
At least he knew now. So when things got rough, he could try to help. Or at least help get Evie out of any situation that would only make him upset.
Reims pressed his lips together, wondering if he should just keep his mouth shut, but in the end he spoke softly.
“I think he would have been proud of you. I mean… obviously I didn’t know him, but you’ve done so much. I don’t think he would want you suffering. So… if you ever wanted to talk about him, I don’t mind. If it’ll help any. Or we don’t have to talk about it at all.”
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Posted: Sat Jul 06, 2024 5:50 pm
Yvoire didn’t know if Daddy would have been proud of him. The ghost on Daedalus had wanted him to stop, but he knew that had probably been the Chaos talking. It hadn’t been real. He shouldn’t give it much thought except to miss Daddy even more.
He didn’t even know if Daddy had known what was happening when his starseed was taken. Yvoire didn’t know if he’d fought, or if he had the chance to. Did Daddy even know what a starseed was? Had he been Yvoire before Énna, and passed the name down like he passed his blood? Or had he been no one at all to anyone but Énna and Dad, a random victim who’d been at the wrong place at the wrong time?
Yvoire couldn’t decide which would be worse.
He told himself not to think about it, shook the thought away and shifted ever so slightly closer to Reims.
“Thank you,” he said, voice so quiet it was nearly a whisper.
He didn’t cry for once, but he found himself thinking it might not have been so bad this time if he did, because Reims wouldn’t think less of him for it.
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