|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
 Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 12:40 pm
There must have been ten or so of them, sitting around a table, eating food Fysarius wasn’t familiar with, talking about- nothing, as far as Fysarius could tell. The chatter was overlapping such that he couldn’t identify the specifics of what anyone was saying, and it would be a wonder to him if anyone else could, either. It was practically overwhelming to listen to, but the group looked happy. For the moment.
”The first thing I’m going to do when I get back is eat some decent food!”
Honestly, mood.
Fysarius’ golden gaze flicked up briefly, first to the speaker, then down to Ny sitting on the floor, then back to his desk. She looked suitably engaged, which he found odd at minimum, but figured it wasn’t worth commenting on if she was pleased. He was trying to work on something and would’ve preferred less distraction, but he would literally never send Ny away, regardless of what she was doing. That didn’t stop the conversation from continuing.
The speaker began to sputter a bit, seemingly gagging on a bite of whatever he was eating. The group around him jokingly commented that ”The food wasn’t that bad!” mere moments before the jovial atmosphere took a turn. The man seemed genuinely to be choking.
The team acted quickly, shoveling away the dishes on the table to lie the man down on his back, but they seemed a little panicked to know what to do from there. Fysarius watched only from the corner of his eye as the man sputtered up a mouthful of blood to the terror of his crewmates, and after a round of moaning and writhing- a high-pitched screel of sound as something burst free from his chest cavity, escaped his body, and skittered away off screen.
Fysarius flinched, eyes widening slightly and focus riveted back to the scene, as a commotion tore across the screen. He knocked his knee into his desk at the abrupt startle, causing a cacophony from the myriad of glass jars atop it, as the cast became particularly animated as their friend just… died? Presumably? And they did nothing to help him? He barely understood what was happening in this film. It all seemed very staged and convoluted.
“Ny,” Fysarius seethed softly as he tried to settle back down. “What is this? Why are you watching it?”
|
 |
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 12:53 pm
Owlish emerald eyes turned from the laptop monitor placed before her on the floor, and up to where Fysarius sat at his desk. He looked… agitated, but that hadn’t really been out of character for him since they’d arrived on Earth. Just like it wasn’t out of character for him to be disinterested in partaking in the human way of entertainment. She’d picked up this disc from the movie section of the grocery store specifically for what it had been called, and a part of her had thought it would be informative. A recounting of a person’s experiences with beings not born of Earth.
That did not quite seem to be the case, as the movie, Alien, was apparently entirely fictitious.
…Though it did shed a little light on why the Vanguard were to keep their true identities secret from the population at large. Earth’s interpretation of what could be beyond their planet seemed to trend slightly toward the negative, and in all fairness to them, maybe there were parasitic-chest-cavity-dwelling-monsters on some world out there. Any number of things could be living in space. They had a right to be concerned.
Upon the discovery that the movie was in no way a documentary, Ny had decided to take it for what it was: entertainment. She’d partaken in the tasks that were custom for such an event here and popped a bowl of popcorn, found herself a pillow and blanket, dimmed the lights, and settled in on the floor in Fysarius’ room to see if she could find any enjoyment in the flick.
And she kind of did.
It was a little staged and convoluted, but it was supposed to be, wasn’t it? Because surely no one was actually supposed to be frightened by what was happening on the screen. The little alien creature was even small and kind of cute in its own way! Not so different from the bizarre amalgamation of species Fysarius was trying to create.
With a little smile in his direction, Ny collected the disc case from her side and passed it over to Fysarius, pointing out the short paragraph on the back for him to read the synopsis.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 1:02 pm
He felt skeptical as he plucked the case out of Ny’s hand, using just two fingers to pull it closer to his eyes for inspection. ’Thrilling,’ it claimed. Fysarius didn’t know about that, but it was definitely strange. The ‘aliens’ had something like youma vibes, if the youma wanted flesh more than starseeds. The ‘vibe’ might just be dangerous intent.
Satisfied that he’d gleaned all he could from the box, he passed it back to her, still looking a bit disgruntled. “I didn’t know you’d taken an interest in watching these types of things,” Fysarius admitted. It wasn’t anything they’d done together, anyway.
…Maybe that was just because he’d personally taken interest in very little to do with this planet.
Even now he still preferred to stay in his room when he wasn’t attending classes or cataloging specimens for the natural history museum. But in Fysarius’ defense, he was busy with his own personal project, and it was getting to the state where it would be worth sharing soon. He glanced back to his desk, where the entire backboard of the wall behind it held a thin glass case, perhaps three inches separating two panes, and between those panes, a small sample of insects.
They were very much like ants, and in fact, ants had been the breeding host for this new specimen: some genetic combination of redwood ants and a few strands of spider and moth thrown in.
…But they were not dangerous. They were supposed to be dangerous. How could they be useful if they didn’t have the ants’ acid or the spider’s venom of the moth’s evasive flight? They were to hunt and kill. And if there were another hundred or so of them, perhaps they could at least manage the ‘hunt’ part… But it would require too much energy to make so many tiny creatures, no matter how small. And if he tried to release this insignificant amount into the wild, they were promptly devoured by larger, more advanced predators.
Fysarius wasn’t deterred. This was progress, even if it was slow. He kept them at his desk so he could fondly observe them during their limited time, and use them to remember what modifications he still needed to make.
And Ny’s weird movie was distracting him with all the human screams. “What are you getting out of this dramatic display, anyway?” Fysarius prompted.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 1:08 pm
She clicked the trackpad on the laptop, freezing the screams and panic of the cast in an instant, until she willed them to continue.
It was true, the movie was a little silly and a little noisy. There wasn’t much to ‘get’ out of it, besides that she’d already spent some of their funding on it, so it would’ve been a waste to do nothing with it. And the supermarket wouldn’t let her return it after she’d already opened it… But it brought her an inexplicable joy!
The humans must like weird monsters. They must like coming up with new, weird monsters. Even just a quick search through their film collections showcased a wide sampling of outer space alien monster movies. Some positive. Some negative. And then if she searched for weird creatures, there were plenty of genres for that! Ny would never, ever, ever say it out loud, but she thought it was- it was kind of, weirdly cute for Fysarius to be so interested in something plenty of humans were interested in!
They liked monsters. He wanted to make weird monsters.
…He wanted his to hunt his own people, in essence, but that was literally what the ones on the screen were doing too! A monster imagined by a human that hunted humans, so??? People didn’t seem to like each other much, either.
Ny stood from her nest of pillows and blankets and moved to stand at the edge of the desk. She gently tap tap taped the pad of her finger to the glass pane housing his special ants, then took the disc case back from him and flashed the cover with the alien on it. She smiled at him and leaned down to rest her forehead against the crown of his head.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 1:18 pm
Fysarius stared at her: a dim, confused sort of look as Ny tapped away at the glass panes of his oversized ant farm. Then she flashed the cover of her silly film, showcasing the alien creature on the front of it. It took him a few quiet moments to piece together what she was trying to convey to him- the two species definitely didn’t look or act very similar. And one of them wasn’t even real! But it clicked in his head that the correlation was probably not meant to be so much between the creatures as it was to be… between those who made them.
“Oh, it is not the same,” Fysarius snapped as his cheeks flared an uncomfortable dull purple color, and he smacked her hand away from the glass.
His had a purpose. His were important, even if the importance of his hybrid ants was just a ‘stepping stone’ to something more useful, later. In a century, humans would have completely forgotten about a stupid Alien movie. But for what his ants would eventually do, Velenia would remember them for millennia and millennia. They were important-
Important, important, important-
To the reclaiming of their world.
“You could stand to be less condescending,” Fysarius scoffed quietly in Ny’s direction, as he produced a microfiber cloth from the drawer of his desk to clean her greasy popcorn fingerprints off his ants’ enclosure. “They aren’t for something so demeaning as entertainment, you know.” Because he would never subject his projects to that.
’Don’t be mean to her,’ a tiny voice in the back of his mind warned him. Being upset with Ny was not the same as being upset with someone like… like Cypher. Fysarius could ruin as many friendships and relationships as he liked, so long as this one was kept mostly intact. He shouldn’t snap at her for expressing her feelings (no matter how gross he thought they were- and that was unusual, since he didn’t usually disagree with her very much… But to compare him to a human of all things!). And Fysarius expected that given her expression and mannerisms, that Ny’s intentions were purely innocent.
It was just that he still felt fighty. Still defensive of his teeny tiny organisms that he’d put so much into, that couldn’t speak for themselves and didn’t really have a place here besides just being a ‘stepping stone.’
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 1:27 pm
Dark emerald lashes did a rapid flutter in her confusion, before Ny’s light and teasing expression crinkled up into more of an unhappy sort of pout. Fysarius wasn’t supposed to be fighty and snappy with her. That was never how it had been between them-
Or rather, maybe it had once been like that, but they’d both been very, very young and freshly meeting each other, and Ny had been fighty, not Fysarius- he’d only been sweet and happy and chattery with her, and how could she possibly not eventually relent to his wide and innocent golden eyes and his stupid bright smile when Ny couldn’t remember anyone else smiling at her like that in her whole life?
…He hadn’t really smiled at her since they’d been stuck here. About a year and a half ago. He smacked at her hands, looked disgusted by her suggestions, didn’t relax when she leaned on him, didn’t-
Didn’t give her any kind of affectionate reciprocation when that was all she was trying to do: just be with him and love on him.
Either one of them could be the instigator, usually. When Fysarius was ‘bubbly’ Fizz, he was unabashedly touchy, but Ny hadn’t seen that since very early into their arrival. She was used to draping over him, dragging him around, and if he wasn’t prepared, he would squawk and flap and yip- but not smack at her. Not glower at her. She could glower at him. She could shake and smack at him because that was just their dynamic. It had pleased him, once- It had pleased both of them.
Her grip snared around the top of Fysarius’ bicep. He was still significantly smaller than her: her fingers encircled his arm pretty easily, and it was no more difficult to haul him up and drag him out of his chair, to his feet.
Ny’s brows furrowed, her nose wrinkled, and she pinned him with a demanding sort of look, Why was he treating her this way? It didn’t feel like it should be like this. The stupid human movie was silly and ridiculous, and the only reason she was watching it here, in his room, was so that she could be close to him. It was all Ny wanted- pretty much ever. To just… be close to him. Did he not want that, anymore…?
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 1:36 pm
No, it wasn’t how it was supposed to be. Fysarius thought even he recognized that. There had been a shift, and not a positive one. He didn’t like it, but he also couldn’t do anything about it. Even when he felt sorrow and guilt for how things were now, it was coated in this veneer of anger and upset- those were always the most prominent things: rage, doubt, mistrust. He wished it wasn’t that way, wished he could just ‘fix’ how he was feeling, like he should be able to. Velencians should be able to do that, or at least, should be able to not let it have any impact on them.
Fysarius just didn’t function that way, he supposed. It had never bothered him before. It had never seemed like a bad thing to be happy, so why should he bother with tamping that down? He just wasn’t happy anymore. It was difficult to hide. He didn’t know how.
And it wouldn’t even be so upsetting to be angry if he didn’t have Ny. Of course the shift would upset her. Of course it would alter the relationship they had. His feelings for her personally hadn’t changed. It was just that displaying them had. Fysarius had always loved Ny. He could barely even remember a time, some century or so ago probably, when she hadn’t been in his life, right next to him. He’d glued himself to her and she to him. He’d fawned on her and kissed her and held her, was excited for her to work with him…
He still was. He knew his heart was grateful for her to be there, her presence next to him was always a comfort, but…
“What? What do you want?” He demanded. The words were sharp and cutting as they fell from his lips. He tried to jerk away from the way she grabbed him, and when her grip was sturdy as a vice, he slapped at her arm to knock it away.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 1:49 pm
Ny thought she was reasonable. She thought she did her best to understand, even if she didn’t always feel with the same degree of strength Fysarius felt- But just because she ‘didn’t always’ didn’t mean that she couldn’t. He slapped at her again, and letting it happen twice was quite enough. He’d been angry for months, and well, she could be angry too.
There was no thinking about what happened next. Just doing, which seemed to be on the agenda for both of them. The fingers on one hand fisted in the front of his shirt, while the other grabbed for the arm he swatted at her with. If there had been thinking (which again, there wasn’t), Ny would’ve thought him perfectly capable of stopping her. She probably would’ve expected him to, even. It just wasn’t what happened.
She yanked him forward as she dipped, catching the smaller boy at the waist with her shoulder, and propelled him clear overhead, sending him crashing upside down into the wall behind her.
The room rattled. His glass encasements clinked, the plants in his various pots rustled and seemed to chatter at the commotion. Nothing broke, as far as she could immediately tell. But Fysarius thudded into the wall and crumpled down to the floor, and Ny- jumped as if startled, as if it hadn’t been her own body performing the action that caused this-
But he could’ve stopped her. He should’ve…
Still, it only took a beat of confusion and self-horror and shock and fear for her to be back at his side, crouching next to him as her fingers hovered close to her best friend, silently asking if he was hurt- if she’d hurt him.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 2:01 pm
“Guh-hyuh?” Alright, well, it took both of them by surprise. Fysarius did know that Ny could be particularly handsy and a little rough, moreso with him than with most others. She’d shake him to get his attention, smack at him when she thought he was being belligerent or disrespectful, throw herself at him when she was happy to see him, but she didn’t usually do anything that would hurt him. Not intentionally. He thought.
She jerked him from where he stood, and the air briefly caught in his throat as he stared blank golden eyes at her. The taller Velencian pitched him over her shoulder, flipped him clear upside down and smacked him into the wall behind her, where he was quick to flop gracelessly and uncomfortably to the floor.
Fysarius was definitely more dazed than actually hurt. His heart thudded. His breath came in short little gasps. Maybe he was a little dizzy from the rapid readjustment of his position. His neck- no, it was okay, just crooked strangely from the awkward landing. But he could right himself, sliding to lay mostly on his side against the wall while his eyes sought out the girl who’d done this for some reason. He wasn’t hurt, just a little winded, but Ny…
Immediately apologetic. Immediately sorry. He could see it in her face, in the frightened hovering of her palms close to him.
Fysarius was exactly one single breath away from absolutely erupting on her. From shrieking in her face and telling her to get the ******** away from him, get out of his room, leave him alone, don’t bother him again. Ever. She wasn’t any different than any of the rest of them. Just here and not doing anything about it, and she felt like an obstacle that he had to work around because she was always just there, and actively impeding him-
And the thought of screaming at her filled him with such dread.
Not her, not her, not her. Not Ny. He couldn’t lose Ny, and he didn’t know how much (or how little) it would take for her to leave him. She’d picked him up and thrown him, so even if she was so abruptly sorry… She was angry, too…
He was angry. They were both angry. And he couldn’t do anything with it.
His first inhale was silent, as was the exhale. The next inhale caught in his chest, and when he breathed out, it was just the tiniest little sob of sound. Because the anger had to go somewhere, and he supposed if he wasn’t going to scream about it, his body just decided it was going to cry about it, instead. No matter how Not Preferable either option was.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 2:08 pm
He hadn’t exactly told her it was okay for her to touch him again, but Ny didn’t exactly care. A choked little sob left his throat, and Ny’s hovering hands grabbed for him immediately, as they always did when she sought comfort or wanted to provide it to him. She dragged him up from the ground, smothered his face into her chest and held him tightly against her.
There was usually no need for her to verbally communicate with him. He knew her so well it was rarely a problem for them, unlike it was with most others Ny had to interact with. But she did feel it was warranted now, for her to tell him, in no uncertain terms-
“Fysa, I’m sorry,” Ny croaked, craning her head down to nuzzle into his shoulder. Hot tears prickled her eyes too, though not really from repressed upset.
It brought her immense sadness that this had happened between them. It brought her sadness that she didn’t know how to help him, even though she tried. It brought her sadness that she would lash out at him, even while he was hurting. It brought her sadness that they were trapped here, and her one very special person struggled with it so mightily. Ny was sad for all the surrounding circumstances; it just didn’t… hurt her the way it hurt him. That was the part she didn’t know how to make sense of: how much he was hurting and what she was supposed to do about it.
She really needed to communicate properly with him, because they were on such… different wavelengths, now…
Ny nuzzled his shoulder, let her fingers card through his hair. “I want to be here for you,” she whispered. “But I don’t know how to help… Do I make things worse for you? Should I give you space? I’m most used to… to being near, if you need me, but if you don’t need me, anymore…”
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 2:16 pm
Oh, it was so pitiful, and he knew it was, and there was nothing to be done about it. Fysarius’ shoulders shook as he sobbed quietly into Ny’s chest. Yes, a part of him still wanted to push her away; she’d attacked him, but a larger, needier part still held that she was his best and pretty much only friend, and he needed her, always, even while they were upset at each other… And it definitely wasn’t just him that was upset, because he could feel wet where Ny’s face was pressed to his shoulder.
’She should apologize,’ that aggressive part bit out. For invading his room with her human entertainment, encroaching on his space, throwing him- She should be upset because she was in the wrong. Fysarius didn’t care what he’d done to deserve it.
But he also hated that part that kept hissing in his ear, and he didn’t want Ny to see it, or be a victim of it. He wouldn’t let that part talk to her.
“I’m trying,” Fysarius whispered softly instead, though it wasn’t the first time he’d promised her as much. He knew rationally that he didn’t like this person- didn’t like being angry or judgemental or mistrusting or hateful, didn’t like thinking about Ny like she was in his way or burdening him. The thoughts were just there. He wished they weren’t. Wished he knew how to make them ******** off. He couldn’t do anything but tell her he was trying, somehow.
“And I do need you. I don’t know what I would do without you.” That was true, at least. Even angry at her, she was still the only good thing on this planet that he could imagine. “I want you to be here. I don’t want to snap at you. I’m trying not to. It’s just hard.” And it didn’t seem like it was that difficult for anyone else, and that made him more frustrated- why was he like this and no one else was? “Please, just… I don’t know. I’m sorry, too. Don’t leave…”
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
Posted: Tue Jun 27, 2023 2:23 pm
Ny sighed and kept holding him, clinging to him. If she understood better what he was feeling, maybe she’d be able to do more, but that just… wasn’t how it was, and she kind of thought the society that they’d grown up in probably had not adequately provided her- or him- the tools to get through this with relative ease. It was burdensome to have so many feelings. Poor Fysarius didn’t know what to do with them all.
But Ny would hold him, pet him, assure him that she wouldn’t leave and that she would be right here, and it almost didn’t even matter what he did to her. It didn’t matter how sad she was for him; she would be here, right next to him when he needed her.
She hugged his shoulders, wiped her eyes on his sleeve, and just gave a tiny nod.
‘Trying,’ for whatever it meant, was the most she could expect. It was all they could really do together.
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
|
