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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 10:58 am
Finding work was easy, but leaving Jevan and Cazna behind hadn't been. Even if Hargitt hadn't necessarily wanted a romantic relationship with the other man it was nice to have that semblance of a family again. Their last night together they'd had dinner as a unit, with Cazna chattering on and on about the day she'd had, and when she went to sleep he'd spent the night looking at the sky with Jevan.
It made for a melancholy ride to the next settlement. He'd acquired a cart and some sort of beast to pull it. Something large and hooved, but if pressed he couldn't remember the name of the thing. As he led the caravan his mind wandered, drifting into other worlds and places that he couldn't go.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 11:09 am
Rajani had made no such attachments to the place they'd been so leaving didn't dampen her mood. She did, however, notice that her companion seemed to be lost in thought. It made her concerned that he was unhappy about leaving for a whole other reason. So a frown formed on her features, nothing too out of place in the long run, but she did scrunch up her nose some with the thoughts.
"You do know you don't have to come with me, right?" Raj made the wrong assumption that Hargitt was upset to have to move on to the next job.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 11:16 am
"I know."For a while after he remained quiet without so much as a look to his companion. In truth his mind was so detached from the situation that he didn't realize how things may have appeared. It wasn't until the creature leading their cart stepped over a root, causing the whole cart to jostle a bit that he seemed to snap back into reality for a bit. "...I want to be here. I like doing this...thing that we do, you and I. Right now it's what I want, but they just reminded me of what my life might have been like before he left." Pursing his lips, Hargitt sighed. "I wish those thoughts were as easy to burn as my sketchbook." He'd shown her once the well worn book he kept on him at all times. It held a variety of sketches, mainly of a sleeping Tivis and a capramel herd, but there were a plethora of a certain man. Well drawn sketches at that and the only time Hargitt had shown Rajani was right before he burned them.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 11:27 am
She looked at him but said nothing, letting the two of them walk in silence. Until the cart jostled and Hargitt seemed to pull himself from wherever his mind was. Rajani looked at the windling with a side glance. Mention of him caught her attention. As the self appointed best friend she didn't exactly like him because of how Hargitt would always look saddened when thoughts popped up. Rajani made a grunting sound as she looked forward. "How did they remind you of something you didn't have?" Her words seemed harsh but her tone was more curious than vicious. Rajani hadn't ever had what Hargitt had so she failed to understand and she made sure he knew that to avoid misunderstandings. "I keep your bed warm at night and give you companionship." Raj offered a smirk as she said this, mostly to lighten the mood some. "And I think I do good and finding you distractions for other needs." She gave her eyebrows a bit of a wiggle there.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 11:44 am
The corner of Hargitt's mouth quirked and he leaned over to bump into her. "All you need is a beard and you're practically my husband." Shaking his head, he looked at her from the corner of his eye but tried his best to stay focused on the road. Still, it was enough of a quip to brighten his mood a bit. "It's hard to explain. I guess it was Cazna? I always assumed we would have a big family one day since both of us had so many siblings." Not together together, as most traditional couples, but there were other methods. "These days I'm busy just taking care of you so I think it balanced out."
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 12:08 pm
She reached up and rubbed her fingers over her smooth chin. "That might be asking a lot. I don't think I would look so good with facial hair." The shifter snorted a bit. Imagine. Her with a beard. Even a little bit of stubble would look out of place on her face. It was too young looking for all that. When she heard his words about it being more so Cazna she tilted her head some. "You want a daughter?" Or was it the child in general? Rajani didn't do so well with kids most the time, Cazna was the exception so far. To be fair she only thought of the kid that ended up with her foot in their face when she thought of children. Not her best moment. "Or.. daughters, I guess?"
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 12:17 pm
"...Yeah, I do." It felt weird admitting to it, but it was something that he'd been thinking about for a while. Looking after little ones had been such a core aspect of his childhood that the absence felt odd. "Or a son." His bloodline wasn't the best at producing daughters, but unlike his mother he wasn't hung up on gender. If the time came Hargitt would be happy no matter what. "Is that odd?" Maybe he wasn't the best at connecting to strange children, especially in settlements, but Hargitt did genuinely like them. Sure, he'd made a few random kids cry here and there with his sharp words, but little ones like Cazna got to him.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 12:24 pm
She was a little surprised by the admission but if she really took the time to think about it then it fit her friend. Rajani had a small family unit whereas he had a large one. She had been taken from hers at a young age and missed out on a lot but he had gotten to spend his early years with his siblings and the fact that he had younger ones meant he was used to the lower ages. Rajani had been the baby when she'd last seen her family. The shifter tilted her head to the side as she looked at Hargitt. "Coming from you... no. It's not odd." Sometimes he was like her and was awkward with people but there were times when it showed that he was better with them. "You do know you can't have a daughter... or a son... with a man, yes?" As his friend she felt the need to point that out. It was very obvious but she still said it.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 12:42 pm
The question sobered him a bit. It was all well and good to contemplate things, but when it came down to reality the options were limited. "Unless I start to find antennae attractive and fall for an Aishan hybrid then yes, I am aware of my limitations." In all honesty Hargitt didn't even think he could ever go to a tree to ask for a child no matter how much he loved someone. He may as well ask the moss that grew along the path for directions. "If I were with another man we might have sought out a surrogate for him or even adoption. I don't imagine adoptees would take kindly to a wandering, single man and surrogacy is...tricky." Mainly because he thoroughly did not want to 'know' a woman in that way.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 12:47 pm
She made a thoughtful noise as she took in his response. Hargitt had obviously thought about the whole thing before. It wasn't a sudden desire. Which made her wonder how long her friend had had this feeling without her noticing. "You want a child pretty badly huh?" She asked in all seriousness. As she waited for his answer she looked forward, seemingly more interested in the road ahead of them. Hargitt did have a point. Unless antennae suddenly became attractive then there was little he could do without adopting, which she suspected usually required two parents. And his mention of surrogacy... well, now there was an idea. Of course she could see the down sides to that considering who her friend was.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 12:50 pm
"It's not an immediate need, but I would like one someday." Right now there were so many variables weighing against him. Lack of steady of income, connections, housing, and not to mention Rajani herself. He knew that while she tolerated having Cazna around, might have even grown to be alright with her if they'd stayed long enough, she might not feel the same having an infant so close all the time. Or a child, if he chose to adopt. "Have you ever thought about being a parent? You could always adopt one day so you wouldn't have to be involved with anyone." Of course, the arguments that were stacked against him were against her as well. One day she might very well be in a good position for it though.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 1:00 pm
A nod was given as he said that he did want one. Not right this second perhaps but it was something he wanted. Rajani stayed quiet as her thoughts danced around certain parts of their conversation. She seemed content to stay in her own thoughts before he asked her if she had ever thought of being a parent. A weird scrunch of her nose was given, her lip curled up slightly, and she opened her mouth to reply before shutting it just as quickly. Had she before? No. Rajani hadn't ever considered it. Mainly because she knew to have her own she needed to let someone touch her and she didn't have that kind of trust in someone. To adopt meant she needed to accept someone else's spawn as her own and she knew she was too selfish at the time. "I... don't think I could adopt. I know my own limitations. I'm far too selfish for that." The shifter stared hard at the horizon for a second before more words came out of her mouth. "I'll get you a child though. If that's what you want, I'll get one for you." If he wanted to adopt but they turned him down for being single then she'd claim to be his other half. She was around enough anyways. If he wanted his own then.. Raja trusted him enough to deal with that too.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 1:07 pm
Hargitt navigated their caravan around an cluster of thick, violet trees and did his best to avoid bumping into the bioluminescent fungi that grew on their trunks. He succeeded for the most part, but by the end of it their beast's ride side had streaks of vibrant green. "That's fair." Adoption wasn't for everyone and Hargitt could only imagine that it would be harder if the child was old enough to remember where they came from. Maybe it was a parent who passed or a home that was far from good to them? He was content to just ride along at that point when Rajani, being herself, just blurted out the most worrisome things. "What, like kidnapping? You can't just take a kid, Rajani." Almost in an instant his eyes had gone from passively looking at the road to her.
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 1:16 pm
When he mentioned kidnapping she blinked a bit. "I hadn't thought of that.." Why hadn't she? Rajani had been taken from her family when she was little so it should have been the first thing she thought of, right? "I guess I could kidnap a child for you if you asked. I wouldn't be happy about it though." It seemed like the shifter was seriously considering it. Truthfully she wasn't. She knew what it was like to experience that. And Hargitt would be able to tell by the look she tossed his way that she was playing with him as far as kidnapping went. "I meant.. if you needed someone to help you in having a child of your own, then I would." She shrugged her shoulders as if what she said wasn't so shocking. "Stop thinking I am going to break the law all the time."
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Posted: Wed Jun 22, 2022 1:35 pm
Wait, was she...If kidnapping wasn't at the forefront, what exactly had she been thinking of? "Please, don't." That was the very last thing they needed right now; a band of shifters chasing them with spears and goddess knew what else to take back a baby Rajani had run off with in the night. She wasn't breaking off in a grin or coming out with any quips which worried him more than anything. Maybe he shouldn't have talked about this... ...and then there it was, that look, and he breathed. "You would?" He couldn't help it; Hargitt let out a bite of laughter. "Rajani, you hate being touched and I'm only interested in men. How would that even work?"
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