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 Posted: Sun Sep 05, 2021 6:45 pm
It had been something on his mind for a long time, too long, and it ate at him every time he talked to Clabe. A burning feeling in his stomach that twisted and knotted. Every time he came home hurt or saw Caleb hurt - it hurt internally. The guilt ate at him constantly but he wouldn't toss the other out either. He liked having his companyw. But he owed it to the other to explain why things had ended as they had. He owed a lot to Caleb but the biggest thing was answers - honest ones.
It was why he set up dinner, something simple and not so spicy, and he had pillows and plushies about the living room. He was trying to soften the blow a bit as well as lower his own anxiety over this talk. It had to be done though. It had been so long - too long. He couldn't keep it up and Caleb did deserve better.
With everyone out of the apartment tonight he thought it the best time to prepare things. He'd cooked, set up the living room, and then texted Caleb to meet him in the living room...he wanted to talk. He knew it sounded ominous and not good but how else do you make that simple sentence not sound that way?
As he sat fiddling with a plushie he had in his lap as he waited. He hoped this went well but he didn't think it would, the other would be mad and he had every right to be. Tucked in his lap, hidden by the plushie, was his henshin pen. Winged and gold and green with black wings he knew he it was time to talk openly.
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Posted: Sun Sep 05, 2021 7:01 pm
Caleb was curious as to what Xi-Wang wanted to talk about, but he was happy to be called in to talk. The hadn’t had some time to themselves without…injuries involved for far, far too long.
Entering the living room, Caleb gave a little smile, running his hand through his hair, grimacing slightly at how long it had gotten…he would have to go and have it cut soon but…not right now. “Hey stranger. What’s all this?”
His eyebrows raised slightly and he couldn’t resist a gentle dig. “Are you trying to court me? Dinner and stuffed animals? Is this you saying you want to have a cuddle fest movie night or something?”
Because…he would be down for that. More than he was willing to admit. But if that wasn’t the case well…clearly he was simply joking! Nobody could prove otherwise.
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Posted: Sun Sep 05, 2021 7:25 pm
Even though he hadn't meant the word stranger to hold any deeper meaning it did. In a way he was a bit of a stranger to Caleb wasn't he? He'd been keeping a second part of his life a secret for so long..a part of his life where magic and fighting took place, though not a lot of fighting. But it was like a part of him was a stranger for Caleb.
"A movie night would be nice, we're over due for that. But...." And here he took a deep breath. "I feel like I need to explain something - a lot really. It's been a really long time....and I should have explained it a long time ago, especially since we moved here." All of tghem really. Since his two partners and his sister. He owned it to Caleb to let him know who he was living with...what he was living with. There was even the potential threat if someone decided to follow them home, if they weren't careful enough.
"Remember when I told you why I went missing for a long time? Why I came home injured? Going into a mirror...." Trailing off he took a moment to hug his plushie as he motioned the other to sit, and join him.
"It was true...but I didn't explain it all. There was a lot more." Right now he felt a bit too sick to eat but he was hoping it would pass, he really was. Offering a plushie up to the other.
Now how to go about wording this...how to explain? Nibbling on his bottom lip he slowly started. "Mirrors...or rather what's beyond their surface. It - it has a personality of it's own...sort of. A different world, vast and empty...but it's there and it is real. Something seems to control it - something with a personality. It pulled me and others in....others who know what exsists beyond the surface of a mirror."
Tilting his head back he shifted about and closed his dark eyes for a moment, remembering what space had been like. They hadn't stepped foot outside of the castle buut it was still space - it was still off this planet. "There is more out there - in space. The mirror showed me that...showed the others with me that. We were stuck in space..." And they almost hadn't made it home. When would the mirror pull them in again? When would it trap them and not let them go? They were mirror senshi but they were servents to the mirror and it's realm really.
"We got to see space...at least a part of it. It was pretty...but like a rose." There had been thorns too, the almost being turned to crystal being the biggest thorn.
A soft laugh and he ran his fingers through his dark hair. Opening his eyes slowly. "I know I sound insane...and it sound unbelievable. I can prove it...at least some of it." He could easily prove a lot of it but he couldn't get to space. Space would forever be denied to those who served the mirror. They were bound to earth and whatever was inside the mirror.
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Posted: Sat Sep 11, 2021 5:36 pm
Caleb listened, feeling a certain amount of dread beginning to pool in his stomach. He didn’t want to hear this. Didn’t want to know this...didn’t want Xi to finish his words, didn’t want…
...Just didn’t want.
He forced a laugh, that sounded remarkably natural and nodded, tossing the pulsh in the air and shaking his head. “That sounds like a hell of an adventure! What movie is that the plot for, hm? I’ll go see if I can find it online or something.” He stood up, still holding the stuffed animal, squeezing and twisting it nervously. How could he deflect this? How could he stop this? How…
He drew in a breath and plastered a smile on his face, one that looked hurt and worried. “I get the feeling that you’re just making excuses though. If you’re not happy with what happened...if you’re not happy with how we broke up...then we shouldn’t have. So things were going on, what of it. If you’re...damnit.”
Deflect. Deflect everything. Deflect everything.
“I almost hoped you were going to invite me to your little threesome. You know...I…” He ran a hand through his hair, working himself into a pretty great fit now. “...Maybe I should move out. I’m not over you, Xi. And...I keep hoping and hoping...and if this is how things…” God, he was talking out of his a** now, and wanted to call Yu. Didn’t want to be pulled into andy…anything. If there were mirrors involved with Xi’s life...he didn’t want to end up being targeted by those ******** mirror senshi.
“I...I have to go. I’m sorry. This isn’t fair to either of us...I’m just in the way.”
It did hurt. Seeing them all together. It did hurt and he was tired of it.
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Posted: Sat Sep 11, 2021 5:45 pm
s**t, this was not how he wanted it to go. Caleb wasn't believing him, or didn't want to, because Caleb had to know he wasn't the sort ti lie especially not to him. He also couldn't make something like this up, he wasn't that good.
It took a turn, or several turns, that he wasn't expecting and when he jumped to his socked feet he reached out for the other. "You don't need to move out. I like having you here...but if you think you need to. I just always wanted to explain why the break up - what happened. That it was my fault, sort of." because really it was mirrorspaces fault, it had pulled them all in. He hadn't been able to help it...couldn't get away and couldn't help himself. He had been, like everyone else, at the mercy of the mirror and what was beyond it's reflective surface.
The henshin pen he'd had in his lap was in his free hand, the one not reaching for the other.
"You aren't in the way. I just want to be honest...to tell you what happened - I can show you." Holding up the pen now as he spoke, even if Caleb wasn't looking at him in the moment.
"You should breath Caleb...you sound worked up and stressed..." Very worked up...more than he liked to hear him sound.
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Posted: Sat Sep 11, 2021 5:52 pm
“I don’t care, Xi-Wang. I don’t care. Just. Leave me alone. I don’t want to deal with this right now. Deal with you, deal with my feelings. I’m going to stay with a friend for a while.” He didn’t look. Didn’t want whatever the male was going to show him. Didn’t want everything to be ruined by whatever it was that he had.
Caleb’s hands balled into fists and he drew in a deep breath. “You just…” He swallowed and felt tears gathering in the corners of his eyes. “I don’t care. Please. Just go away. I don’t want to see you for a while. And I don’t want to hear these excuses when I come back. If you want any chance at us being friends again…”
He trailed off and shrugged. “Just drop the subject. I don’t care about your fairy tale space world. I don’t care. It was more than that anyway. I’ll find someone who’s better for me...I…”
His voice broke, and Caleb shut his eyes, tears really falling now, to his horror. Maybe...these were things that he really did need to say...but…
Damn.
“I lost you. And then I lost Benji. And then I had to live here and watch you fall for other people...and it sucked! And I don’t…” He drew in a breath. “I gotta go.” He walked towards his room and walked inside, closing the door firmly behind him.
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Posted: Sat Sep 11, 2021 6:02 pm
Biting his lip as he let Caleb go, hoping he hadn't ruined everything but feeling like he very much had, he let himself sink to the floor. He'd messed it up and he'd tried...he really thought he had. But how else do you explain such things to someone else? This wasn't just his home either though...caleb had put money into things as well and if the other left he owed him, he couldn't just let Caleb walk away from things.
Finding his stomach churning and food unapatizing he set to just staring at it all and trying to not feel like puking, not an easy task, as he wraped his arms about his stomach and held on. He thought he was doing the right thing, something he should have done a long time ago, but it seemed this was the wrong thing.
he knew Caleb still cared for him, he'd known it since the start, but he'd hoped Caleb would have found someone meant for him...someone better for him. He deserved better and Xi-Wang knew it, he knew he'd never be the best for Caleb, not with his secrets and hiding things for so long. They couldn't work and he knew it. He'd wanted to help Caleb get back on his feet and find happiness...and instad it seemed he' dhurt the other more...by finding happiness for himself.
He'd been ahorrid friend.
He didn't head for his room, not wanting to be enar Caleb's room, but he did get up and head for another room on the opposite side of the apartment so he wouldn't be in the others way...he didn't want to hurt him further - the ruin things more. His pen was left tucked up under some pillows in the living room. The food remaine don the table. And a rift was between them...deeper and wider than ever before it felt like.
Whoever Caleb went to he hoped they could help...hoped they cared and maybe even loved him...could mend him in ways he couldn't.
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Posted: Sat Sep 11, 2021 6:24 pm
Caleb stood, his back against the door, breathing deeply.
When his heart had stopped pounding so fitfully, he began to move, packing a duffel bag with a few changes of clothes, his laptop and a few other odds and ends. Enough to get him started...wherever he was going to go.
He couldn't stay here any longer, that much was obvious...but.
The male sighed, his eyes roaming around the room. It had been home. Had been nice but.
...It was time to go.
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