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 Posted: Sat Oct 31, 2020 12:08 pm
Ilian moved slowly as he picked up the finished cups of tea and turned to make his way back to the bedroom where Lovely was resting. It had been a couple weeks since they reappeared in Destiny City, and he’d carried Lovely the rest of the way to the hospital after teleporting as close as he could manage without being spotted. The monster had done a number on them, but from what they could determine, hardly any time had passed in the three weeks they were in that village.
Naturally, Lovely had refused to stay at the hospital longer than necessary, so once they had both been patched up, they were reluctantly released to return home.
Which was where they were at present, having already told work that they would not be returning until they had healed. Work that, as Ilian sometimes forgot, wasn’t exactly necessary to survive any more, now that Lovely confided in him about his bank account.
“It’s hot, be careful,” he needlessly warned out of habit as he placed the mug down on the tiny bedside table. He took up a spot on the edge of the bed, wincing a little as the movement pulled at the bandages covering the stitches that closed the gashes across his back.
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Posted: Sun Nov 01, 2020 10:03 pm
If either of Lovely’s brothers ever caught wind of his current injuries, they’d probably show up in another vain attempt to drag him away.
He had two broken ribs on his right side, three lacerations that required stitches, a concussion, and deep bruising along his torso and arm. His right elbow was sprained, and he suffered a minor break to his right wrist, which he hadn’t even noticed beyond all the other pain. At the hospital, they’d put his wrist in a hard brace, his arm in a sling, patched the rest of it up the best they could, and pumped some fluids into him to correct the dehydration and malnourishment that resulted from his confinement in the cellar.
Lovely sat there for as long as he could tolerate the uncomfortable hospital bed and the obnoxious level of noise — if it wasn’t machines beeping or alarms blaring, it was nurses and doctors talking up and down the hall, making it impossible to get any rest. Even a low grade fever wasn’t enough to convince him to stay, even as the staff advised him on the risk of infection.
At home, he sat in bed propped against the pillows, finally cleaned of all the blood and sweat and grime, dressed in the warmest clothes they had — sweatpants that once solely belonged to Ilian but eventually found their way into Lovely’s wardrobe, with a long sleeve shirt, and a hoodie also stolen borrowed from Ilian at some point over the last four years.
Whatever. It was easier and more cost effective to share some clothes than it was to buy his own pajamas.
“Thanks,” Lovely mumbled, reaching out with his good arm to take the mug of tea. He sipped at it slowly; hot though it might be, it felt good going down his sore, dry throat.
He paused after a few sips to eye Ilian indignantly.
“You should be resting,” he said, not less forceful than usual, but quieter, too, like he didn’t have the energy for his usual volume. “You just had your back sliced to s**t. Don’t think I don’t know how much it hurts.”
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Posted: Mon Nov 23, 2020 1:21 pm
”I am resting,” Ilian insisted, although he didn’t quite meet Lovely’s eye. “Unless you want to have your mom or brother come over and take care of you instead of me,” he pointed out after a moment, knowing that Lovely would like that even less than Ilian being up and about when he needed time to heal. They both needed time to heal, and neither of them really had that luxury.
“I’m not the one with broken bones. Nor did I have to harass my way out of the hospital,” he added as he tried to make himself more comfortable on the bed. Once upon a time he might have been concerned about spending too long in the hospital, but now that he was aware of Lovely’s trust fund, he hadn’t been quite as desperate to get out before the bills started piling up.
Carefully, Ilian got up, but only so he could turn around and carefully climb onto the bed next to Lovely, but grabbed a pillow so he could lay out on his stomach instead, his arms wrapped around the pillow under his head.
“God, I was worried about you,” he admitted, mumbling into the pillow as he glanced up at Lovely. “Next time we’re stuck someplace like that, you’re not allowed out of my sight.”
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Posted: Mon Nov 23, 2020 8:27 pm
Lovely grimaced as he thought about his family. If his mother was here, she’d sigh and gush and whine and be more of a nuisance than a comfort. If either of his brothers were here, they’d probably give Ilian a bunch of dirty looks and lecture Lovely about his life choices.
Nope nope nope, he did not want to deal with that. He’d much rather have Ilian take care of him.
Which was an unfamiliar circumstance, even after all this time. They split the cooking and the rest of the housework pretty evenly, but Lovely still felt as if he took care of Ilian more than Ilian took care of him. Ilian was more needy emotionally — which wasn’t saying much, since neither of them were particularly emotional in the first place — and he got himself into more trouble, creating messes Lovely inevitably had to help him out of, provided Lovely actually knew about said messes.
Being looked after was… strange. Sitting in bed made Lovely restless. He felt like he had to get up and do something, but every attempt so far had resulted in Ilian ushering him back into their room.
Lovely rolled his eyes and frowned, glancing down at Ilian. His good hand inched over the mattress until he could wind one of Ilian’s curls around his finger, giving it a gentle tug.
“So you finally got a taste of your own medicine?” he asked, because he couldn’t let himself get sentimental that easily. “Now you know how I feel every time you go off on your own. Why do you think I’ve given you so much s**t for it?”
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Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2020 5:37 am
Ilian rolled his eyes in return, but shut them as Lovely tugged at his hair. He never argued against Lovely playing with his hair. He never admitted to liking it, but Lovely never admitted to enjoying doing it either.
"Every time I went off on my own. I told you I wasn't going to do that any more," Ilian mumbled into the pillow, and eventually opened one eye so he could look at Lovely's expression as he frowned at him.
"You're supposed to be able to handle s**t better now. What the hell happened? Why bother with a promotion if you're just gonna get yourself busted up like that? I haven't come home looking like that since…"
Since Lovely had rescued him after he'd been kidnapped and tortured. When Lovely had given up his comfortable life in his big mansion to eat butter pasta and live in a musty, one bedroom apartment with his made up boyfriend.
"Shut up," he mumbled before Lovely could argue or point out exactly what he was thinking. Ilian closed his eye again and buried his face into the pillow to hide the heat that colored his cheeks.
Sure, he had Jericho and Lovely as friends before all that, but he hadn't expected Lovely to just go to such lengths to try and save him. He didn't think he mattered that much to anyone other than Sorin and Jericho, but Jericho had his own family and problems to deal with.
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Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2020 1:23 pm
“I didn’t realize being promoted to General meant I was suddenly immune to injury,” Lovely said. He still spoke quietly, so his voice was gently mocking instead of scathing. “Didn’t I say that when you were trying to get me to accept the promotion? A promotion isn’t going to protect me, or whatever.”
He certainly proved that. He’d been a General for no more than a month and a half, and he’d already gotten himself beaten up worse than ever before. It seemed that, in his case, with greater power came greater injuries.
Lovely took a deep breath with the intention of letting it out on a heavy sigh, but he regretted the action as soon as pain flared through his ribs. He winced and groaned, knocking the back of his head against the wall behind him in frustration. Recovering from this was going to be a b***h.
“I don’t know if you noticed,” he added, “but whatever that creature was, it was massive. I lost track of time, got distracted by that b***h corrupt senshi I told you about before, and couldn’t escape or fight my way out when that thing’s antlers were as big as I am.”
Not that anyone larger than him would have had an easier time of it. It’d taken dozens of them to finally defeat it, after all. How could Ilian expect Lovely to fight it off on his own?
Ilian probably didn’t expect that at all. He was issuing pointless complaints because the other things he could say were too revealing or sentimental and would make one or both of them uncomfortable. Lovely was guilty of it, too — saying things he didn’t quite mean to cover up all the things he was too embarrassed to say.
He threaded more of his fingers through Ilian’s hair, carding through the curls and gently petting Ilian’s scalp.
“I’m sorry,” Lovely said, so quietly it would have gone completely unheard if Ilian was any further away.
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Posted: Tue Nov 24, 2020 5:43 pm
Of course Ilian had noticed how massive that creature had been. His own attacks barely had any effect on it, no matter how hard he hit the damn thing. He knew he was lucky that Lovely got out of the situation with as many injuries as he had. It could have been a lot, lot worse than some broken bones and cuts that needed stitches.
He had been lucky the monster’s claws only managed to cut across his back. If they’d caught his neck or anything more vital, well…
Ilian didn’t say anything as Lovely spoke, nor did he say anything as Lovely put his fingers through his curly hair. However, he did manage to relax some, the tension in his shoulders easing.
He would need more pain meds soon, but for now he was content with Lovely playing with his hair.
For a few long moments Ilian didn’t respond or move, but eventually untucked his arm closest to Lovely from under the pillow and his head, and moved it as though stretching out, letting it stop and rest where Lovely’s thigh met the bed.
He hated feeling helpless, and he hated that Lovely felt the need to apologize. His complaint about Lovely not protecting himself better was less of a critique of Lovely’s abilities and more of his own inability to protect the person he cared for most in his life.
“Just don’t do it again,” he grumbled, turning his head so he didn’t have to look at Lovely, but also didn’t pull his arm away. “You’re not allowed out of my sight,” he repeated, again more as confirmation for himself than critique of Lovely’s ability to hear him the first time.
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2020 12:15 pm
Lovely snorted, more out of amusement than derision.
“Yes, sir,” he said.
A part of him wanted to joke around and make suggestive comments, if only to ease the tension or diminish some of the awkwardness that seemed to be on the verge of creeping in. He could say something completely ridiculous, and Ilian would argue or complain out of habit, and they could both continue to ignore the more serious matters, just as they always did. That part of Lovely was afraid that, if they allowed any variance to their normal routine, everything would change for the worse.
They already knew how the other felt. They had to. Neither of them were blind to it, just avoidant. Why bother putting any of it into words? The concern and protectiveness they felt for one another was enough to get the point across.
But Lovely was tired. He was in pain. The battle they’d just been through was still fresh in his mind, and the three weeks they’d been away — whether or not time had actually passed in Destiny City — had been anything but normal. He couldn’t forget it, or ignore any of the fear and unease, or the desperation that his ordeal had brought rise to.
He remembered waking up in that dark cellar, delirious but conscious enough to understand the seriousness of his situation, and the only thing he’d wanted through all of it was to be here like this, with Ilian.
Gritting his teeth against the pain, Lovely shifted down to lay on his back, then rolled onto his good side to face Ilian. The closest part of Ilian that was in reach was his arm; Lovely grabbed it with his uninjured left hand and held on tight. He closed his eyes, which grew suddenly hot and wet.
“It’s been a long time,” he forced himself to say, voice a little unsteady, “since I’ve been that afraid.”
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Posted: Sun Nov 29, 2020 7:40 pm
The very fact that they didn’t share how they felt with each other meant that Lovely’s shaky confession brought Ilian to full alert. He was careful not to pull his arm away from Lovely’s tight, concerning grasp, as he pushed himself up enough to turn onto his side to face Lovely. His back ached from his wounds, but he ignored any discomfort to try and figure out what was going on with Lovely.
Was he in pain? Was there something else going on that Ilian might have missed?
Or was he just… admitting that he was scared?
When Ilian determined that Lovely wasn’t in more pain than he already was, he settled a little. Not a lot, because it was still weird for Lovely to admit his feelings, but some. Usually it was Ilian who was the more emotional of the two, but after everything they’d been through, he couldn’t blame Lovely for being upset.
“Me too,” he mumbled quietly, not wanting to discourage Lovely from saying how he felt. Part of him wanted to say more, but another part told him to shut up and let Lovely get his feelings out. For the first time in probably forever.
“You getting impaled with metal was pretty terrifying. But being separated like we were… not knowing what happened to you…”
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Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2020 2:04 pm
Lovely didn’t want feelings. He didn’t like them. Feelings made everything weird. They were annoying and embarrassing and half the time he didn’t know what words to use for them anyway, so it was better not to speak of them at all. Feelings were dangerous, especially when their lives were so ******** insane. There was no telling who or what would decide to use their feelings against them. The General Sovereigns. The Queen. Metallia. Some Senshi or Knight with a vendetta.
“Shut up,” Lovely said, the way Ilian had just before, only Lovely’s voice broke and the wetness in his eyes grew worse and quickly overflowed. “Shut up, shut up, shut up.”
Because he was on his side, the tears fell at odd angles, dripping over the bridge of his nose and sliding into his hair. Lovely squeezed his eyes shut tighter, fighting to hold the tears back, but they kept falling. He took a stuttering breath and opened his eyes again; instead of looking at Ilian, he tipped his head to look at the ceiling, scrubbing at his face with his good hand.
He didn’t know why he was crying. They were home now. They were both safe, and the creature was gone. They were injured enough that they could excuse themselves from their duties while they recovered. They had all the time in the world to lay here together and feel grateful that they were both alive.
But what if they hadn’t been so lucky?
Lovely knew that they could easily die from this. He’d always known, and it was why he still fulfilled his obligations — to keep Ilian alive. He’d been doing it for six years now, and he’d do it for however more were necessary, until the war ended or his luck finally ran out.
There were times when that knowledge hit him harder than others.
“Shut up,” he said again, more to himself than Ilian.
Shut up.
Stop crying.
This is so ******** stupid.
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Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2020 2:37 pm
Ilian wasn't sure what to do. He could tell that Lovely wasn't mad at him, or telling him to shut up, but he was still not used to seeing Lovely cry like this. Again, it was usually Ilian that ended up either emotionally charged or emotionally drained to the point of tears.
What they'd gone through, what they'd experienced… Ilian never wanted that to happen again. Sure, Lovely was difficult and only ever really nice (if that was what they could even call it) to him, but Ilian was okay with that.
Carefully, because his back was still throbbing with pain, Ilian pushed himself up more so he could inch closer to Lovely. For a moment all Ilian could do was stare at him, marveling over how Lovely looked when he was in tears. Beautiful wasn't the right word. But seeing him open his emotions? That was rare.
Because he didn't know how else to try and comfort Lovely, Ilian leaned down to press a kiss against his tear covered lips, one of his hands gently brushing through dampening blond curls.
It wasn't much, but he wanted Lovely to know he was there. That he cared for him. And more than that. Ilian doubted that they would ever say it, but they felt it. He knew Lovely felt that, otherwise he wouldn't be crying like this.
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Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2020 4:02 pm
Damn, talk about embarrassing.
It shouldn’t be, because Ilian made him feel safe and comfortable, like he could do anything he wanted and he wouldn’t be judged for it. He could cry when he wanted to, swear when he wanted to, throw a tantrum when he wanted to. He could act like a complete brat and the most Ilian would do was shake his head or roll his eyes and ask him what he wanted for dinner. Lovely didn’t have to hold back, because Ilian could handle it. He could be himself — as stupid and narrow-minded as he was.
But still. Lovely hated to cry. It felt gross and it looked awful. His face got red and blotchy, streaked with tear tracks and wet with snot. He got stuffy and his breathing was loud and he made dumb gasping noises like the air wasn’t enough.
And Ilian kissed him like it was nothing. Like it was okay. Even though Lovely’s tears tasted salty and his nose was starting to leak and he had to keep pulling back to force air into his lungs. Even though Lovely’s face was creased with misery and he probably looked the ugliest he’d ever been. Even though Lovely couldn’t say anything, because every time he opened his mouth to speak, all those stupid noises cut off his words.
He grabbed at Ilian again, burying his good hand into Ilian’s shirt. He tried to kiss back, but the crying made that difficult, so eventually Lovely ducked his head down beneath Ilian’s chin and cried into his neck instead of crying directly in his face.
Stupid idiot, he thought. Acting like a baby.
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Posted: Tue Dec 08, 2020 5:30 pm
If they hadn't both been injured and in pain should they move the wrong way, Ilian would have tried pulling Lovely into his arms. It might not have been very impressive since he wasn't that much bigger than Lovely, but he could have at least tried to comfort him better than just… leaning over him like he was.
As Lovely grabbed onto his shirt and buried his face against his neck to cry, Ilian shifted his arms down so he could rest easier on his elbow, his forearm sliding behind Lovely's neck. He still had his other hand in Lovely's hair, but soon had to move a bit to get more comfortable.
"We'll be okay," he let out a breath and placed a kiss on Lovely's head this time. "Just stay with me." Because without Lovely, Ilian wasn't sure what he would do.
But for now, Lovely could cry all he wanted, and that was fine. He would have to deal with Ilian crying again sooner or later, so he might as well take advantage of it now.
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Posted: Wed Dec 09, 2020 3:17 pm
Not only was the crying embarrassing, but it hurt like hell.
Which only made the crying worse, which made the pain worse, which continued in a seemingly endless cycle until something in Lovely’s body finally shut off and the crying began to diminish in a long series of gasping breaths. He kept his face tucked against Ilian’s neck, waiting out the worst of it, seeking comfort from Ilian’s warmth and closeness and the hand that slid through his hair. Lovely could have easily fallen asleep like that, and a part of him was tempted to, if only so he wouldn’t have to deal with the aftermath of his breakdown, but that seemed rather cowardly and he hadn’t spent nearly enough time reassuring himself that they were both alive and relatively well.
His grip on Ilian’s shirt loosened, then let go, moving his arm to rub at his face with his hoodie sleeve. He soaked up the rest of the tears and wiped the snot from his nose, too lazy and impatient and in pain to get up to find their one box of tissues.
When he had better control over himself, Lovely tipped his head back to come out of hiding, putting his blotchy face in view.
“Ow,” he complained, trying to end on a bitter laugh, but the effort was half-assed at best.
Everything ached worse than before.
“Sorry,” he apologized again, scanning Ilian’s face and thinking he looked a bit uncomfortable.
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Posted: Wed Dec 09, 2020 3:40 pm
He probably looked a bit uncomfortable because he was uncomfortable. But only because he was holding himself at a weird angle over Lovely while he cried, not wanting to stop him until he was ready to stop. Now that Lovely seemed to have calmed down, Ilian eased back onto his side, doing his best not to wince as he pulled at the wounds he had on his back.
"Don't be," he said in response to Lovely's apology, shrugging a little as he used the sleeve of one of the last hoodies Lovely hadn't stolen from him to mop up the tears that had gotten on his neck, and then reached out to mop what Lovely missed with his own sleeve. He purposefully poked his fingers out of the sleeve so he could put his hand through Lovely's hair and give his golden waves an affectionate ruffle.
"I can reheat your tea if you want," he said, nodding to the forgotten tea Lovely had left on the bedside table. He didn't blame him for forgetting it. It had been a while since they talked about anything more than what they wanted for dinner or conversations with similar levels of importance.
"Or I can just stay here for a while longer," he then offered, but took a moment to lean back over and press a new kiss on Lovely's lips. "I'm sorry you had to go through everything… in that place," Ilian clarified, feeling guilty that he hadn't been with Lovely the whole time. Maybe he would be less injured if he had been.
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