Welcome to Gaia! ::

There was a pleasant chime, and Elaine's soothing voice emanated from the screen.

"Buzzword detected. Tone analyzed and confirmed. Angryman Protocol has been initiated."

The cool blue glow of the screen brightened to show a live feed of the living room above. Reggie was sitting on the couch, being boring with a puzzle. He probably even wanted to tear apart all the work he'd done and start over! Then he'd take another several months to redo that tiny bit. Madness.

A feline face illuminated by the flickering light of the screen smiled in pity. The poor guy. At least the source of the protocol was evident: one of his many roombas had broken down just nearby. Easy make, easy break.

"BUTLER!" Orias called, turning away from the display as he continued to solder the exposed circuitry below it.

"Yes, Master?"

Another roomba, but this one had been augmented and fortified for personal service. This was the version 2.0, a secret upgrade to the unit he'd made for Namielle. Of course he wasn't going to leave himself without a roboslave. Who would?

"Go and collect your broken brother from the floor up there. Use the uh... clock entrance. Reggie shouldn't hear that from the living room. Be quick and take him to the R.A.M.M. room. Don't let Reggie see where you come from and DON'T LET HIM SEE YOU COME BACK IN HERE."

Orias tugged his tinted welding goggles over his eyes and lit the accompanying torch threateningly.

"Or, I'll rip out your core and install it in the garbage disposal. And invent robo-tastebuds. Wouldn't that be fun? Go on."

Taking a hearty swallow of a nearby frosty mug of beer, the feline turned back to the slowly-forming shell of something massive and sparks began to fly. B.U.T.L.E.R. had been summarily dismissed.

Thankfully the master, in all his Mauvian wisdom, had seen fit to refrain from installing a personality core into his most faithful servant! Feelings would only impair its ability to perform tasks quickly and efficiently, after all, and mistakes were an opportunity to learn! Master Orias only made those threats out of love, because he knew the roomba could do better.

Yes, that was it. Thusly inspired, the little robot motored over to a lift at the far corner of the room and extended its single arm to poke at the lift control panel. It patiently waited as the platform slid smoothly down the tube that ran into the ceiling far above, coming to a halt and opening with a soft woosh. Smooth instrumental jazz echoed softly from the interior. B.U.T.L.E.R. wheeled into the elevator and keyed the inside panel; the lift hummed to life and began to ascend.

"Doot doot deee deee doot dooo," the roomba sang along with the sax lines, its electronic voice strangely in perfect tune with the music.

It had had a lot of time to practice, after all. The lift wasn't exactly fast and it was a long ride up to the ground floor.

"Deet deet dweeEeEeEeeEEeEEEEEE!" B.U.T.L.E.R. sang with the solo, momentarily unaware that the lift had slowed to a stop and the grandfather clock that concealed it had slid aside.

"Oh, thank you clock!" the robot buzzed to its less-advanced cousin.

The poor thing was driven by a pendulum and gears after all, and the synthetic servant figured it appreciated a few kind words now and again. The clock even had to be wound to work, it didn't have a self-charging power core. After rolling out of the elevator and into the spare room, B.U.T.L.E.R. made its way into the hall and toward the living room.

"Good evening, Master Regula!" it chirped at Reggie when it entered, a small pixelated smile beaming up at the man from the display that served as its face.

It was easy to locate the sad corpse of its collapsed brethren near the opposite wall.

"Master Orias sent me to relieve the source of your aggravation as he is quite involved with his work. Forgive my tardiness."

Without further ado the roomba drove over and lifted the scrap onto the platform that functioned as a serving tray/carrying surface. A quick pat of its clawed arm reassured the decidedly inactive robovacuum that everything would be alright.

"Now let's get you back to the basement lab so the master can get you back in working order," B.U.T.L.E.R. cooed, completely oblivious to the incorrect destination. "To the clock!"

Just like that, the assistant and its cargo zoomed out and away down the hallway... only to stop short of the ticking clock back in the spare room. B.U.T.L.E.R. searched its memory banks. What was the time to set for opening the lift? Come to think of it, could it even reach the clock face?

The roomba's extendable arm extended to its very limit, but grasped pathetically at thin air nearly a foot below the hands of the clock. The search returned that this was actually B.U.T.L.E.R. 2.0's first time out of the lab, and the secret time passcode had not been shared with it. Perhaps this was a test? Master Orias would certainly appreciate the direct approach. The little robot dialed its voice modulator to maximum volume.

"MASTER ORIAS, PLEASE OPEN THE SECRET CLOCK ENTRANCE TO THE BASEMENT! I HAVE NOT BEEN GIVEN THE CODE. ALSO, I CANNOT REACH THE CLOCK. THANK YOU!"

B.U.T.L.E.R. gave a pleased little digital smile. Surely the master was pleased with how quickly it had passed its test. Far below, welding goggles were lifted away as the Mauvian in question stared at the ceiling in disbelief.

"He'll be a toilet when I'm done with him," the feline groaned, tossing away his spanner and quickly keying a command into his wristpad that would open the lift.

Hoping against hope the moronic little robot would saunter in just in time for the clock to hide all evidence of his project, Orias stood to walk to the distance tube that would deliver the source of his irritation.

The face of the clock flipped horizontally at the shout, revealing a hidden viewscreen. Said screen flickered to life to reveal a full view of a curious nose, which pulled back to reveal Orias's goggled furry face. A furry face which currently was rather expressionless.

"Oh... it's you. Hey Reggie. I'm guessing you heard my future trash can shouting his triumphant solution to the 'clock puzzle' then. Alrighty."

The screen snapped off without any further explanation, and flipped to show the clock face once more. A low hum began to emanate from behind the fixture, and several moments later the entire piece slid aside to reveal the lift and the low, cool blue light within. On its floor sat B.UT.L.E.R., extending its one hand and waving.

"Hello again, Master Regula!" it chirped, ushering the man inside as the clock clicked back into place. "I hope you like smooth instrumental jazz!"

Reggie would thusly be treated to a very intimate performance of the robot singing along with the musical track, while far below Orias was quickly tossing this and that hither and thither. It didn't really matter where, just had to be out of sight. One last wrench slid under a panel via a swipe of a rear leg and... done! A paw clap later and ELAINE had powered down, along with all the main ceiling lights. Only indicator panels blinked softly in the background, leaving one area light over the clock lift at the far end. In effect, a pool of luminescence in a sea of darkness dotted with faint digital stars winking through the void.

Orias rose to stand on his hind legs, front paws lifting his welding goggles to rest on his forehead before crossing behind his back. And he waited. Finally, the soft woosh of the lift descending from the ceiling above announced the arrival of his guests, and the transport hummed to a stop before the doors parted with a chime.

"Master Orias will see you now!" B.UT.L.E.R. exclaimed with palpable glee, substituting his best pixelated smile for a bow he could never hope to perform.

"Hello Reggie," the Mauvian said plainly. "Glad to see you fit in the elevator."

"Of course your house didn't have a basement before I arrived, if you want to be so understated about it. I prefer the term 'sanctuary.' I've been spending a lot of my spare time building it, months really."

Orias padded along the edge of the pool of light, forelegs wrapped behind his back evoking the image of a wizened father lecturing his naive son on the ways of the world.

"You see Reggie, you have all this power and you don't do anything with it."

He held up a paw to stave off any churlish response.

"Yes yes, you go out and save people and stop Chaos from eating the universe. True. But you don't really embrace your calling. You mutter your little girly phrase and go to work. No epic poses, no real appreciation for the art of it all. So I, your amazingly talented and dedicated partner, have made a head-start for you. Every hero needs a Fortress of Solitude."

Flicking his tail, the Maine Coon gave a singular solid thump of a hind foot on the metallic floor. Despite his padding, the strike echoed solemnly in the encroaching silence of the massive chamber. On the wall opposite, the large display that currently served as the hub hummed to life in a rainbow of intensifying color before pulsing a brilliant blue.

"E.L.A.I.N.E. online," the digital facade announced.

All throughout the hall, machines stirred to life with beeps and whirs.

"Wanna know what the difference between you and me, Reggie?" the Mauvian queried.

"This is my favorite part!" B.U.T.L.E.R. twittered excitedly.

"PRESENTATION!"

Orias threw his paws dramatically into the air and tilted his head skyward as a blaze of fiery light exploded all around them. The senshi's sanctum roared to life with a display of power that admittedly dimmed the power grid for an entire block around the house. Just for a moment, though.

"He watched 'Megamind' and practiced that bit for weeks!" the Roomba servant trilled in his best conspiratorial whisper, which wasn't much of a whisper so much as a quiet shout.

Scowling at the little robot, furry chest heaving with from effort and anticipation, Orias instead looked to Reggie.

"Oh come on, you gotta admit this is cool!"

In true Regula style, the man had given the verbal equivalent of a shrug and asked what it all did. Neanderthal. If it didn't involve punching things like a caveman he never seemed to care much for technology. Orias, in all his infinite mercy, pitied the senshi.

"Oh you don't have to worry about that," the Mauvian retorted with a dismissive paw wave. "It's all geothermal, I had B.U.T.L.E.R. digging the power core shaft for weeks. Remember when he didn't show up for like a month? Good times, I could hear myself think. That dimming was just a mild EMP, haven't gotten all the shielding up yet. Everyone'll just blame the city power grid anyway."

"It's really hot down there," the little roomba added. "I could feel my motherboard starting to liquify at the bottom."

"Price of progress," Orias continued. "Anyway, think of this as your own personal Batcave! E.L.A.I.N.E. has been uploaded to help with all the processing. And look!"

The Guardian cat scurried over to a vaguely conical device and patted it with pride.

"This is M.A.P.! It's a database compiled from all the data that those beetle sensors provide while scanning for Chaos signatures. Then it projects it out into a much more detailed map than the transponders can. Pinchy-pully motion still works though. That's the main point of this place, but it's modular. We can do whatever you want to do with it.

"It'd make a pretty baller game room if I do say so myself. Could put in a movie theater, a snack bar could go over there in that corner... I'm working on a forge that uses the Earth's core for smelting, if you like the sound of that. Could put some neat accents onto your senshi stuff once I figure out metallurgy."

In short, the cat had built a massive repository after only planning out one feature, but he didn't need to tell Reggie that. Details came later, the big picture was here!

"Well, as long as the little guys last really," Orias answered, putting paw to chin in thought.

Atty's chin, not his own. It helped the Mauvian think to jump onto the man's shoulder and bap a paw or two on his face.

"Which should be a while if they're not in any hot spots. Chaos energy does break them down, just like everything else, so the more action they see the quicker the burnout. All the transmissions are stored here anyway, and you can call up historical data to get heatmaps of activity if you want. That's the whole point."

He trotted over to the conical transmitter, waving a paw at it to bring up a holographic 3D display of Destiny City.

"They've only got about a one block radius, but if you put them right at the edge of each other's range you can grid them up."

The cat keyed a command on his wristpad and the section of the floor upon which he stood rose with a pneumatic hiss of air, bringing the little inventor level with the map. Next, he pawed at a square of four green dots near the park.

"See? These are all right next to each other, I set them up last week. You just tap here," he touched the tip of a claw to one of the dots, "and it opens the menu."

As expected, a small control line blipped into existence on the display.

"You can list out any events and time stamps, or just drag the little slider in a play by play."

As Orias demonstrated, the glowing pin occasionally flickered red or yellow.

"Remember the colors from the demo? I figured the park would have some ne'er-do-wells, which is why the initial set-up is there. Red was when the Chaos signature was definitely in range of the transponder, yellow was when it was getting out of range. Buuuuut if we click and drag..."

The feline dragged a paw from the one dot to cover the other three in the square. There was an affirmative chime, and a quadrilateral area highlighted itself in blue while superimposing over the park hologram. With a flourish, Orias hit the play button that now appeared on the command ribbon.

Separate from the pulsing green dots that indicated the sensor locations, a red triangle burned into existence and began winding its way across the digital landscape. As it moved, it left a similarly glowing red trail behind it.

"Ta da! And now you can see where the signature was going for as long as it was in range. More bugs equals more range equals more tracking. And it's all stored! There are a lot more features than that, but I doubt you'd remember them. I'd read the instruction manual. E.L.A.I.N.E.! Print out the instruction manual for Reginald, would you dear?"

"Now printing page one of four thousand for job Mauvian Assessment Panel User Guide," echoed the feminine response from the system.

"Of course, if you can't figure it out you can always ask E.L.A.I.N.E. for help. It's why I loaded her in here, after all. Best assistant I could ask for."

He beamed at his senshi, an expression which quickly sobered when his gaze strayed across B.U.T.L.E.R.

"Or you could have the guide uploaded to him, maybe he'd actually be useful for once that way. Whichever you choose, it works so far. If something explodes, well that's just part of the fun. Maybe a bug will take an agent out with it!"