He thought about what Fall meant to a Crow. Milky Way was born here, and as many wolves know he was a singular pup given no sibling. His mother a ruthless older female with respect backing her name. He never knew his father, and he would never learn who he was. Milky Way only recalled certain things about her, he only held the markings of her paws and two stripes that marked his cheeks from her. She was pale, and was warmer toned where he held a blue. He looked like his father, he was even larger like his father.
His red eyes glanced down to his paws thinking of her. Perched on a small incline in the pack, he tilted his head. The star on his good ear allowing its beads to clink together as he turned his ears upwards for once. His broken ear draping over his forehead. When he thought of his mother a remorse flooded his chest cavity. Milky Way's kind smile slipping from his jaws as they parted lightly, showing his dark jowls and bottom jaw's teeth. A solemn look for a cunning, shielded Assassin. Aside from how she looked he knew her as someone ruthless, and as someone who never smiled to the pack she insisted she loved. Perhaps she didn't love Big Bad as she had his father before him, but she loved her job. Being with a whelp made her grounded and have to stay off and out of any danger of jobs.
Smiling was all he had to go against her words, her actions and her banishment. With his solemn glance he sighed out loud. A sound no one would hear from the wolf, if he could help it, but Sully's words had rung in his mind. Where smiles to his packmates that bad? Was his mother right in some way. He refused to be rude or bad like she had been to her packmates unless given a reason. Was he just an outsider here in the pack now? Had he been the only one to remember what she had done to him, his ear skimming his forehead reminding him that he was scarred and ugly. His dye rippled and shimmered against the daylight as he noticed the stars ripple against his fur. Where these spots because he needed to take back some part of him? A part of him not of his father he had never known or his banished mother who had slain a crow. Or where the stars given to him from Stars to make him have more self esteem? Or was it both? The yearling wolf sighed through his jowls as he steadied himself on his haunches on his incline. He hated moping, but it was the month of reflection and the youngin had a lot to do. He was an adult now, or as adult as one could get, he didn't recall much of a puphood. Whatever Crow and Iron Hide that didn't turn their shoulder cold towards the young male were who raised him. He had hoped he was raised well.
His real question was, did he have a family. Of course his pack felt like a family to him. But did any of them feel he was truly family to them? Even Sully who had shown her distaste in Milky had family; Nightingale was even her nephew. It wasn't even that Sully's words had made him dislike her, but maybe that side of her. It made him think of her. It had led him here on his incline. He had seen Big Bad as a empowering older male, who adopted those who needed someone like him. It would be lying if he didn't consider Big Bad extremely scary and someone who Milky Way respected partially out of fear of retaliation. With a smirk he regained a bit of amusement in his thoughts. Big Bad did give Milky Way a gift, he sent him to the Iron Hides, and the gift was much more than what Milky felt he deserved in life. He had to find that part of him he lost when his mother was banished, but he was unaware of how much he beat himself up. Iron Hides and Big Bad had definitely helped Milky Way start to realise this; start to realise that he was not who made his mother kill the bird. She was.
Reflecting on Family made him stop there for a moment. His emotions were raw since his last spar, he even knew that Big Bad was probably mad at him for winning against Red. Hell he probably hadn't seen Red in the little while because he didn't back down and let her win just because. Boy did he wish he had let her. He had, had a fun time though sparring with Red. His mind meandering about the memory of her landing her first move and pushing him into the ground as best she could. It gave him a smirk, but then he thought about the ending of their spar, his ears lowering for a second. Big Bad was not happy with him for sure. But a bashful air crept up his back and into his shoulders with a shudder. Looking down at Red after rolling with her made him practically blush if wolves could do such a thing. Nonetheless he shook himself of his mind. He wouldn't be the sort to say anything about that feeling in him that stirred. He tried everything to not flirt with her, he knew she was a busy sort with everything she had to deal with and her Seer abilities. He was always to lend an ear; and even his good ear to her.
Tutting at himself for keeping those thoughts for long enough he glanced up at his surroundings, when his red eyes landed on purple eyes far enough away watching him he widened his eyes and let his ears flicked forward. She moved away though, and he smiled before she looked away to show his greeting. He hadn't seen her reaction but nonetheless he sighed at himself, less angry and angst-filled this time. More in understanding that he did figure he had some sort of family, or at least a dear friend keeping him here. Red had his devotion as Big Bad did too, but Red alone had his attention even if he didn't have her's. Not that, that would ever bother him, her choice was her's. Even though he was certain she didn't know, unless she could sense that sort of thing too.