lol...

[Saikii]

Earlier today, I got a call from work. I was shopping. I smiled vacantly as the air shattered and slammed the power button on my cellphone, vehemently shouting "NOT TODAY SATAN!!!" in my mind at the thought of being called into work! REQUEST DENIED!!!

scream

NOBODY SEES THE WIZARD!  

[Zphal]

My work asked me to pick up three shifts for next week and I was like "MOAR HOURSSSS!!"  

[Saikii]

My schedule has been extremely chaotic as of late. Days off have become rare because of the turnover rate. It has been stressful, so any days I have off, I have to relish in and guard jealously.

I'm off tomorrow too and to protect it, I am already on Do Not Disturb on my phone, so calls won't go through.  

[wellwisher]

I work at a school where there is no weekend days. I've got work every weekday, but, if they ask me to come in for more, that's good for me. I'll usually come in. but only if they ask me in person. once I'm out of the building, I'm committed to my time off.  

[Saikii]

I like to spend time with my friends and family, discover more about myself, and learn new things. I don't really get to do that at work. Sure, the money is nice, but with so many hours and customers vying for service, it makes me feel like I'm losing myself and my humanity, my soul, to the needs and wants of others (becoming a machine). I don't ever want to lose sight of what's important and dear to me.

I... felt that emptiness before, felt like a hollow shell of likes and dislikes without a soul. It isn't fun. It's... painful... scary... I didn't trust myself. I would see me, doing things I would never, ever want... to me... to others. Those mental images terrified me. I vehemently denied and fought them with everything I have. Those mental images aren't me. That, I came to realize.

I've learned to trust myself after getting help. I've been recovering, getting better, though sometimes I feel like this job could swallow me whole and ultimately leave me utterly alone. sad

I live at home, with my family, so I'm not hurting. I don't have to worry about supporting others or paying utilities, although I realize I need to take more responsibility as an adult. sweatdrop

That said, the most important thing in life to me isn't money. It's love. It's friends, family... the connections and memories you make...  

[TheLuckyOne149]

I'm sorry this happened to you then, somewhat, but I hope things might get better in the Future for you, somewhat. I hope this helps answer your question. Take care of yourself!