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 Posted: Sat Mar 09, 2019 2:13 pm
The Bifrost stood open for all, as it had for almost a year. The great rainbow bridge arched across the abyss of space in the middle of the Surrounding, tethered on the far end between two outposts. It shimmered and rippled with color waiting for someone, anyone, to cross it. At its beginning stood the Gatekeeper's house, iridescent marble walls capped with a gold roof reminiscent of Middle Eastern Earth architecture. The two windows on the front were thrown open, letting what breeze curled around the Surrounding to pass inside, fluttering golden curtains. The deep magenta door between them stood ajar, a glimpse of the room beyond visible.
Inside Bifrost, Transcendant Knight and Gatekeeper of the Bifrost, sat among the cushions on the floor. Green eyes stared intently at the book in her hands, an oversized cup of tea placed on the floor to her left. Her blonde hair was pulled into a braid at the nape of her neck, hanging down to almost her waist now, and she wore only the tunic and breeches of her outfit. Her cape hung over a chair by a desk in one corner, her boots sat by the door. The scars upon her chest had finally healed to scars, twisting the lines of transcendence around the lines.
To anyone who thought to look in, the small room looked positively lived in. A basket of clothing sat in one corner, another basket overflowing with food wrappers and ramen containers. A gas generator connected to a hotplate and a hotpot sat across from her. Several candles burned around the room, the clean scent of sandalwood wafting around the room. It was unclear just how long Bifrost had been here.
Even she herself did not quite remember how long she'd been here. Time passed differently on the Surrounding, without a distinction between day and night. She tried to keep track using her signet ring, but that became too tedious after a few weeks. It wasn't like anyone came to visit her anyway. No one really knew she was here even. She'd made it that way, to be honest. She only returned to Earth when she ran out of food, and to check on with her Grams, and never stayed long.
It was better this way. This was her duty after all, to guard the Biftost. Why not start now? It was a lonely existence, but a fulfilling one. At least, that's what she kept telling herself.
She wasn't built for other things anyway.
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Posted: Sun Apr 07, 2019 2:13 pm
Midgard knew that he was not the most reliable of friends.
It wasn't that he was intentionally a poor friend, it was more that Midgard didn't know how to be a good one. He knew people cared, but he struggled with understanding why they cared for him the way they did. To have this support network that had been given to him back when he left the Negaverse and had to start over was something he would never stop being grateful for.
But having people to rely on, even two years later, felt like such a foreign concept to him.
He was here to help others, to do better, be better than the man he was before and yet...
The knight shook his head, feet carrying him across the Surrounding. Now was not the time to be stuck on such anxious thoughts. He had a purpose, which was for him to check in on someone who had taken the time to check in on him.
Midgard hadn't seen Bifrost, in either form, in months. It was concerning and his own disappearance had been something that came to mind, along with the missed voicemails and texts from the concerned. He had simply been on his wonder because that was where he felt he needed to be.
He wondered if it was the same for his shieldmate.
"Bifrost?" He called as he approached her tower.
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 12:07 pm
Bifrost almost didn't hear the voice among all of her reading. The sound jolted her out of her daze and she frowned. She knew people came to the surrounding, but they sort of just... did their thing and passed her wonder without comment. Yet this voice was close, and the foot falls closer.
She carefully set her book down and crawled forward to see out the doorway. Her eyes went wide in shock.
"M-midgard, what... what are you doing here?!" she said, her voice cracking a little. Panic welled up in her chest, more at the fact her scar on display and she wasn't exactly... wearing all of her armor and uniform. She scrambled to grab a blanket to cover herself with, and the large cup of tea on the floor fell over with a spill of liquid. She cursed, a rather harsh sound for the young woman and scrambled backwards to deal with the spill.
Midgard was here. Why was Midgard here? Maybe just a passing stroll? Maybe he was actually checking up on her and cared and --- No no Bifrost, whatever you do, don't get your hopes up. Maybe he just noticed the tower. Yes, that was it.
It was too painful to consider otherwise.
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 1:08 pm
His approach was tenative, after all he hadn't seen Bifrost or Mary in many, many months. In fact...now that he was thinking about it, the last time he had seen her was a holiday.
Had it really been over a year since he helped her decorate her grandmother's Christmas tree?
The thought made him visibly pale even as her panicked voice responded to him. Wetting his lips, the knight made himself push forward, after all, because she had checked on him when he had lost himself to the tasks he thought he owed to the people once living in his wonder.
"I came to see you," he answered, brows furrowed while he struggled to keep hurt from his voice.He thought that perhaps his friend would be delighted to see him as he was always delighted to see her, but this-- whatever it was with her that she was so concerned with hiding...
Midgard shook his head.
"May I-- May I come in?"
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 1:27 pm
Bifrost tripped over herself and landed in a heap on the pillows in the center of the room, a** up in the air. She grumbled and pushed herself into a seated position, using a towel to mop up the tea on the floor. She wasn't exactly how she'd expected any of this to go.
At his words she froze, hands above the tea cup. Something surged through her chest and let out a shuttering breath of air at the force of it. Bifrost turned slowly to look at Midgard in the doorway, lilac eyes still wide with shock. He came to see her, he came to see her he came to see her her heart screamed in joy. The force of the joy shook her again, and she licked her lips, an apologetic smile on her face.
"S-sorry. I don't... get visitors. Please, c-come in," she said, scooting over and patting the cushions in the depression on the floor. Heat flooded her cheeks and she sheepishly finished cleaning up the spilled tea. "Would you like some tea?" She gestured to the small electric kettle connected to the equally small generator in the corner.
"I spilled mine so... was going to make more...." she licked her lips again as she spoke, all flushed face and awkward movements. Panic and joy warred in her for control, leaving Bifrost unsure if she should be happy or worried that Midgard was here. Happy, screamed on side of her, because her friend, her precious friend had come to see her, had thought of her even! Fear, the other side argued, because why hadn't he before, he must be happier otherwise, something may have happened, don't get your hopes up.
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 1:58 pm
While he waited, the brunet played with the sash around his waist. It was easier than messing with his too-long hair, which fell across his vision while he dipped his head down and gave her time to decide if she wanted to see him.
It was a struggle to dismiss the concern that she would tell him to leave, that she didn't want to see him and truthfully, Midgard wouldn't have blamed her if she sent him away. He knew that he was not a good friend.
He would disappear for lengthy periods of time, failed to check in on people despite the fact that they would check in on him, and that he was not always good at responding when he was messaged.
The man was struggling to do better, but he couldn't shake the feelings that he didn't deserve to have good things such as strong companions and friendships because of all of the things he did that colored his past. Yet, there was Amelia's voice in his head reminding him that it was okay to have people he loved and leaned on.
How could he support them if he was always shying away because he felt like he wasn't enough?
Finally Bifrost responded and a tentative smile blossomed across his face, booted feet carrying him across the doorway.
"If it's not trouble," he responded to her offer, taking in the sight of her tower's insides with quiet speculation. It looked like she was living here.
The thought made his stomach twist unhappily.
"What have--" He stopped, swallowed, cleared his throat and tried again. "Bifrost, have you been living here?"
And if she did, could he even pass any judgement? Hadn't he done the exact same thing months ago?
He pressed his tongue against his teeth and waited for her answer.
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 2:06 pm
Bifrost winced, shoulders hunching towards her ears. She looked away from him, shame flashing across her face.
"...Yes...?" she said with a slight question in her voice, as if that made it any better. Bifrost couldn't lie to him, not when it was so obvious and he'd pointedly asked her about it. He was her shieldmate, he was her friend. Yes, sometimes he wasn't around and didn't reply to texts, but that didn't make him any less important to her. He just had some things he wanted to deal with on his own, is all.
She answered the next obvious question before he had a chance to ask it. "For... a while. Maybe a year, maybe more? Time works differently... here..." said Bifrost, her voice trailing off with the admition of just how long she'd been here. Chronos.... that was bad, wasn't it?
She glanced at him briefly, waiting for the impending fall of disapproval.
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 2:21 pm
Green eyes narrowed in concern, Midgard choosing to look at their surroundings instead of at Bifrost. Because he was still standing his hands balled into fists at his sides and he chewed on the inside of his cheek. He chose to listen, to keep from interrupting until she was done before he gently pushed something out of his way with his foot and took a seat across from her.
"A year," he repeated, his voice soft.
Hands came to rest on his knees, fingernails digging into the fabric of his pants when he finally dragged his gaze up to meet hers. One, inhale. Two, exhale. Three, inhale again. Four, try and talk.
"Has it really been that long?" It was unclear what he meant. If it had truly been that long that Bifrost had been living in her wonder or if he was talking about the last time they'd seen each other. He had spent months in his own wonder, hiding from the world and doing his best to throw himself into the things he thought would help him repent.
What was his strong, confident friend doing holed away on a place that only a few traveled to?
He was quiet for a long time before he said. "Mary, are you okay?"
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 2:31 pm
When the disapproval didn't fall, and he simply sat across from her and spoke softly, Bifrost swallowed thickly. She let him catch her gaze and hold it, until the war in her chest threatened to overwhelm her and she looked away.
She couldn't lie to him. The words died in her throat and she swallowed again, pulling her knees up to her chest.
"Since the start of last year, I think. If my clock is right..." Silence fell over them for a long time until he spoke again. Bifrost looked back up at him for a moment, then away again as she spoke.
"It's... easier. If I just.. do my duty. Then I... don't get attached. I don't... hope... for things that won't be. Then I don't have to see people - sniffle - that I - sniffle - lov--- care for choose someone else..." The tears spilled over as she spoke, chest aching. She clawed the pads of her fingers against her scars, trying to calm the ache. To keep her control, to keep from falling into hysterics again.
No, she wasn't ok. She hadn't been okay in a long time.
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 8:16 pm
Midgard took the time to try and place his own disappearance, when he'd spent months holed away with only Amelia as his company. Which, his ancestor was lovely company when she wasn't politely telling him to get himself together, but spending time with her wasn't the same as spending time with the living.
Bifrost didn't even look like she had ghosts to keep her company.
After everything had settled Midgard said, "I'm sorry." There had to be more that he could have been doing. If he hadn't been so caught up in hiding and keeping to himself then maybe he would have noticed how his friend was suffering sooner.
Maybe it would have never gotten to this point. Maybe Mary wouldn't have felt like she needed to hide from her feelings and emotions.
"I should have been there for you, I'm sorry."
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 8:37 pm
She spoke, and she looked at him. He was apologizing for not being there, for not being with her, but he couldn't have known. Yes, maybe checking up on her may have been a good idea, but Bifrost told no one by her grams she'd absconded to the Surrounding.
And that was only because Tersa demanded it from her.
"Y-you couldn't have known Tris..." she said, with a sniffle. She shifted closure, relaxing around him and feeling more comfortable with him. To be honest, it never took long for her to relax around Midgard. They were shield mates, they were friends, and she felt safe with him.
That gave her pause for a moment during her scooting. She felt safe with Midgard. She didn't feel panicky - not anymore - and her chest didn't ache. Well, it did, but not the same way. She scooted until she was next to him and awkwardly laid her head on his shoulder, careful of the armor.
"No one knew I was here... And you had... things to deal with, y-yes? Chronos knights are not... the best at keeping in contact." She leaned against him a little more firmly, tension flowing out of her like water.
This was nice. This was.... really nice, actually.
"Do you... want to know what happened? Why I'm... here? Like.. this?" The words were soft, almost a whisper. She didn't want to tell him, to tell anyone really, but maybe... maybe it would help.
Maybe.
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 9:21 pm
Now that Bifrost had come into his space, Midgard felt comfortable enough to slide his arm around her back and shoulders, holding her as close as she would let him. He thought about the things Fiona might say if she were here, she was so much better at words and support than he was.
He tried to emulate her.
"Just because I'm going through things doesn't mean I can't be here for you," he told her.
Wouldn't she have been there for him if he had asked?
Resting his cheek on top of her head he squeezed her shoulder. "If you want to talk about it Mary, I'd like to know," he replied, pausing when he pulled his lip into his mouth to bite down on it.
Had this been what Amelia was trying to warn him again. "But you don't have to tell me anything, we can sit here and wait for tea to be ready."
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Posted: Fri Apr 12, 2019 10:31 pm
Bifrost curled up into his arm, resting her head more comfortably against him. She let out a soft sigh, a pleased sort of sound, as he leaned his head on hers. She did not speak for a long while and simply relished being held like this.
"I... fell in love," she said softly, a soft chuckle in her voice. Why was it so easy to talk to him about this, she wondered. She let her eyes close as she spoke, hands idly picking at her pants.
"So... I woke as Bifrost almost eight years ago now, here on the Surrounding after being killed by a dragon. One of the first Chronos knights I encountered was Celsus. I'm not even really sure how it happened, but I came to admire him. He'd sort of taken point of the Chronos knights at the time, with Virgo and Chronos, and I happily followed him. At one point, we were even Mauvians. I tried to eat french fries, it wasn't pleasant.
"But he was always this sort of... image of a perfect knight in my mind. Somewhere along the way I... fell for him. Then two Christmas' ago I... confessed my feelings. Kind of. Not really. Not directly. And... well...." she rambled, talking more to his lap than him for a bit of it. Bifrost shifted in his arm, pulling back slightly so he could plainly see the scar on her chest.
"Something... broke. In me. So I... did this, to myself." She glanced down, running her fingers over the raised lines maring her transcendence markings. "Didn't know it until my hands were... red. Just wanted the pain to go away.
After the panic attack at the mall I... decided it was better to just. Guard my wonder, like my ancestor, and not... deal with people."
Bifrost bit her lip, fingers picking at her scar as she finished. It sounded just so... silly now that she'd said it. Over reaction, if there ever was one. But Midgard hadn't scolded her or said he was disappointed in her yet. He'd just gently been there for her, holding her and speaking softly.
It was really nice.
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Posted: Mon Apr 15, 2019 3:45 pm
As his nature dictated, Midgard was quiet so that he could allow Bifrost to speak freely and without interruptions. Besides, he didn't know where her story would begin, how long it was, or how it would end and it was his job to listen until she wanted him to talk in return.
When she spoke of the incident on the surrounding, Midgard wished that he could remember but his memories of the event were reduced to the things he had sought out and spoken about as Aluminite. Things that mattered to him, all of the memories, the people he loved outside of his uniform? They had been lost when Chronos had saved him.
Sometimes he mourned the loss but he knew he was better for it.
When she mentioned the scar Midgard glanced down at it and tried to hide his grimace. The self-inflicted harm was difficult to watch and he knew that she needed him to be free of judgement, because that wasn't why he was here.
"Being alone is only going to make it worse Mary," he said after he was certain she was done speaking. "Hurting yourself...it feels good in the moment but after...you're stuck with the reminder of this thing you want to forget and--- Loving people? That's difficult. It's admirable, really, that you love him even if he doesn't love you back." He wet his lip, taking a shaky breath.
"Loving people makes us human. Hurting makes us human, it reminds us that we're still alive, that we're breathing even if we think we'd be better of being neither of those things but Mary...Mary, it's not right for us to be left alone. It's too lonely of an existence and you deserve more than that. You shouldn't be left lonely."
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Posted: Mon Apr 15, 2019 7:20 pm
Bifrost listened to him quietly, watching him with equally quiet eyes. He was... right, of course. No one should be alone, even magical fighters of the universe. She glanced down, shoulder slumping some. Even after Midgard's attempt to be unjudgemental, she still felt guilty for secluding herself away. She turned in his hold again, to face him without accidentally straddling his lap.
"I'm sorry..." He thought she was deserving of more, the words bringing new tears to the corners of her eyes. Her heart ached but it was a different kind of ache this time. She thought of him then, of Tris and Midgard. He too was a lonely sort of person, one she wished happiness on.
She tapped him gently on the chest with her hand, flattening her palm to it.
"You deserve more than loneliness, too, you know," said Bifrost quietly.
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