October had been...horrid. He wished he could have just stayed home and not left Nischal’s home, it was safe and warm, but he had a life and so he’d had to leave for various things and thus he’d been subjected to the magical dangers of fall.

It was over now, the fall at least, but that didn’t mean the repercussions of it had left - not by a long shot. He still woke up with nightmares over the clinic incident. Between the clinic and the hospital, over a year ago, he was certain he’d never step foot into any sort of medical facility again. It also meant he had nightmares which combined the two things. It was nothing the sleep loving teen wanted to deal with, because it kept him from sleeping properly, and yet he had no choice in the matter.

Tonight was one of those nights where he didn’t remain asleep. His slippered feet shuffled against the floor as he headed out of his room and towards the kitchen to get something to drink, maybe eat also. Yawning wide he rubbed at his tired eyes. A lot in the last month, or two, had happened in his life and while he felt like his life was settling down and he was getting over things he did wish he could sleep more. He’d walked into a door at university the day before, because he’d been too tired, and he was pretty sure he’d banged into the dresser in his room two days back as well.

Turning on the light over the stove, not wanting to use the main lights in the kitchen, Xi-Wang went about making some steamed rice and a cup of ramen, spicy sesame. While the ramen cooked in its cup he went to get himself a drink before shuffling to a chair and curling up to eat and drink. His legs drawn up under himself, as much as possible, he started in on the soup slowly. It wasn’t that hot, not for him anyway, as he blew on them to cool them off so he could eat the noodles.

Jason had been very distracted from his Court duties these days. He had a lot going on in his personal life. Things with his father could have been better. They had finally had ‘the talk’ about him not wanting to go to med school. He knew his father’s side of the family had a long line of Doctors and other medical staff in their history, but he just didn’t feel that same drive for that profession. There had been yelling, lots of talk of wasted potential, and finally Jason left his parents home to seek comfort at Nischal’s apartment.

His studies were keeping him busy as well. Being a Junior in college was no joke. This was when things got serious. About mid-way through October the paper assignments came rolling in. On top of several digital designs as well. He had remade the same book cover project a dozen times before he felt happy with it at all. The couch in the living room had become his new haunt. Books and research papers sprawled across the dining room table.

He had gone to bed early that night though, with the intention of getting some good sleep and waking up early to finish off a draft that was due soon. Mornings were usually when he worked best, the problem was he’d been staying up so late these days that he was going to his classes exhausted. He had planned on correcting that behavior, but sleep did not come easy to his worried mind. The last thing he wanted was to wake up Nischal due to all his tossing and turning, so he rolled out of bed and quietly closed the bedroom door behind him.

As soon as he was out in the hall he could smell the food that had been prepared in the kitchen. It seemed he wasn’t the only one that was having trouble getting to sleep. He headed into their living area first and pulled a hoodie off of the couch, slipping it on over his head, before heading into the kitchen to find Xi sitting at the table for his late night snack. “I take it you couldn’t sleep either?” He knew that a lot had happened to his friend lately. His own problems seemed trivial compared to them. He walked past Xi and ruffled his hair a bit, before heading over to the fridge to pour himself a glass of water. His body was screaming that he needed some caffeine, but his head knew that if he had some coffee now he’d never be able to sleep later.

“Sleep would be nice...it feels like a friend that’s gone missing.” Looking up, finally, from his soup as he put his spoon and chopsticks aside. The other had been busy, so had Nischal, it was one major reason he kept everything going on in his own life to himself. He wasn’t the only busy person in this apartment and he knew it...and he didn’t want to become a burden, it was one thing he feared ever becoming.

“It’s almost that time of year where projects and big papers are due also…” He was a college student and had his fair share of due projects and papers, not all of them easy, but he took to school and studies like a duck did to water - easily. So while he had a lot on his plate it wasn’t that hard...he just needed to time and clarity of mind, which his lack of sleep was making sure he didn’t have.

“And I should just find a way to get some sleep...so I can get through what I need to get done.” So that would be one less thing to worry about - one less thing to go wrong. He didn’t need more things to go poorly in his life, at least not right now.

“I already have all of my end of semester projects lined up. It’s very likely to be the end of me this year.” He couldn’t help but think what his workload would be if he was med student. A truly terrifying thought. He wasn’t exactly a natural student like some people. Sure, he was good at what he liked. But his father’s choice of career would have sent him down a very, terrifying path.

He knew that Xi’s only problem wasn’t just school work though. The beginning of fall always seemed to be a crazy time for the magically inclined of Destiny City. Something he had become painfully aware of in the last few years. His instinct told him that wasn’t all that was going on with his dear friend though. Xi certainly enjoyed his sleep. Something pretty serious must be troubling him to cause him to miss out on it this much. He pulled out the chair next to Xi and took a seat.

“Is there anything you want to talk about? Maybe if we get some things off our chest we’ll both be able to get some rest.”

Turning in his seat, so he faced Jason, Xi took a few moments the finish off his ramen before tilting his head a bit to the side. For now his bowl of rice was forgotten, chopsticks laid across the top of the bowl. “Is it that obvious? I didn’t want to bother you or Nischal, your both busy.” And he never wanted to be a bother to others, something his mother had long ago instilled in him. Some things were just hard to shake.

“A lot has happened...almost too much at times. S-someone in the Negaverse...they did some hunting around for me and found my father. I’m sure you’ve heard me talking to someone on my computer at strange hours...it’s a big time difference between here and Beijing. It’s...a bit slow going in binding but good. I just can’t tell him everything about myself.” It was likely, he figured, for Jason to think he meant the war and being a dark mirror senshi but that wasn’t the case, though it had been till recently.

“I think my half sister, my father moved in after my mother, suspects something. With what she keeps asking me.” He was sure she had some idea and it worries him. What if she didn’t agree with it? What if she told his father? Or worse yet...his grandparents?

“I just...w-what if she does know or figures it out and tells my family? I don’t want to lose them because of that.” Shaking his head he let his forehead come to rest atop his drawn up knees. “I just wish I knew how they’d feel ahead of time. But it would be strange to just ask.” It was one of those topics that if you went asking hypothetical questions about would raise brows, and tell people it wasnt hypothetical at all. Maybe now though his issue was more obvious to poor Jason.

“Maybe I just wish I had dating luck as well...maybe that would help the nightmares too?” Someone to share a bed with and talk to...maybe...likely. It would be nice - the comfort from someone he was that close to. “Kit didn’t do dating though...and even if he did he left - vanished.” Ok, so obviously the others offer to listen was a good idea. It seemed that once he got taking he could stop easily, but finally he did.

Jason shook his head a little bit, he had been too distracted to even talk to Xi much these days. He had noticed things weren’t going that great for him and he should have known his friend wouldn’t bring it up to him without a little poking around. “You can always talk to us. No matter how busy or chaotic things seem around here.” There was always time for friends, for family.

“Wait, someone in the negaverse found your dad?” Jason was a little surprised that Xi even knew anyone in the negaverse, let alone would talk to one and ask them such a huge favor. Rhona always went on and on about not trusting any of them. He might have chosen to ignore her warning once or twice, but by now he knew to keep his distance from them. He even got nervous around their Guardians.

“I think you’re worried about something that couldn’t happen. They’re halfway across the world. You’re in completely opposite time zones. How could they find out? If it makes you feel any better...my Dad sort of found out. Nischal basically told him…” Jason had been in shock when his boyfriend had told his Dad the truth at the hospital. Though, it was getting tiring coming up with excuses for him showing up there all the time. Sometimes he wished he had gone to medical school so he could fix up his own wounds. Jason had tried to cover it up, but he knew deep down that his Dad had figured things out. At least they still talked, more before the whole ‘I’m not following in your footsteps’ conversation.

Kit. He didn’t realize that Kit had disappeared though. He knew they weren’t anything official, but he did know that they spent a lot of time together. That Xi probably wished for more and had Kit not vanished, it might have gotten there in time. “I’m sorry about Kit, I had no idea…” Dating wasn’t something that any of them did easily. Jason had gotten extremely lucky with Nischal. The fact that they had so much in common, though Jason had had to work out some of his own issues with Nischal along the way.

“Y-yeah...I met someone..I didn’t know they were in the Negaverse at first...or that they were a Captain who threatened me. B-but it’s ok...I don’t think, after helping me, they want to talk to me anymore or be friends...or anything.” He whispered. He’d done something, maybe, or was it just that the other hadn’t liked something about him? Something he couldn’t change...some basic part of who he was. Biting his bottom lip he shrugged a bit, more to himself than Jason.

“I know...but some people can be old fashioned...my grandparents I’m sure are. I don’t like to hide things from people, especially family….but I don’t know them well enough….” And there were questions, as you’d figure when first getting to know a family member, about dating and if they were seeing anyone and other such questions.

“M-maybe I’ll question my half sister...I don’t know. And yeah...Kit mentioned maybe leaving...he didn’t say when or for how long. He just was gone then.” He didn’t know where or for how long and Kit hadn’t told when he was even leaving - he was just gone. “I want to be mad….but there had to be a reason - right?”

“You met someone? Like...how you met Kit kinda someone?” If so, Jason was starting to think that someone cursed Xi with relationship trouble. Maybe there was some kind of purifying thing they could do for his friend. Not that he believed in those sort of things, but obvious something needed to change.

“So, it’s something you have to hide for the time being. It’s a little white lie. Nothing that’s hurting them.” Even though his Dad knew, it wasn’t something they discussed further after that day. His Dad trusted him not to get involved in anything too stupid, and so far he’d been safe enough.

“As for Kit, you have to understand that him leaving, wasn’t the result of anything that you did. Okay?” The men in this apartment, himself excluded, had a bad habit of blaming themselves when anything went wrong. Things completely out of their control. He knew Nischal still blamed himself after Jason was injured in Mirrorscape. How were any of them supposed to predict what happened? The only person to blame was an evil space Queen.

“No - no...the Negaverse agent...the Captain. I met him as a civilian...when I was visiting a friend late night at Romano’s….I didn’t know what he was till a run in or two later…He offered that night, the first night, to help me find my father if I could get him papers...to give some sort of a lead - something to go on. I don’t think he likes me though...not anymore. I don’t know why...not really. But not in a dating sense...a friend sense.” But it did seem he had relationship issues...Caleb and Kit and then even a friend, or maybe a friend. He wasn’t sure about that really, not with how easily the other seemed to distance themself from him.

Sighing he shifted so he could lean into the other gently. “I know that...about Kit. He taught me Caleb wasn’t all my fault. He helped - a lot. I just...I knew he didn’t want a relationship but a person can’t help feelings they have….I wish I could though.” He really did. It would make things a lot easier in life, at least for him, and he prefered things being easy. Less stress and drama...that was what he wanted in life.

“I was ok with it just being what it was though….maybe one day it would have changed. But - but he just left. I knew he was planning to but he didn’t tell me when he left.” And it hurt. Why hadn’t Kit told him? He’d gone to visit and found out the hard way...no mirror to get to his apartment.

“I thought...I thought dating, or even being with, someone from our own court would be safe...that it would work.”

“Oooh, okay.” For a second there he had been a bit worried, though he had had a...sorta friendship with a negaverse agent himself a while back. He thought that they could be friends, but it didn’t really work out in the end. Those people had tempers, or no personality at all.

He wrapped his arm around Xi’s chair when he leaned into him, more than happy to comfort him. This couldn’t be easy for him to talk about, but he knew it was healthy for him to get it off his chest. Even if they couldn’t puzzle it all out tonight, hopefully it would start the healing process. As he talked about Kit he was reminded of himself back in the day. He was the king of rejecting people that wanted a serious relationship. He broke a lot of hearts until Nischal came around. At first that’s all he was looking for from him as well, but things changed. Kit probably just wasn’t ready for that sort of thing in his life. He might have gotten to that point had he stayed around though.

“I’m sure he left abruptly for a good reason.” Though, he didn’t want to imply that the other was in trouble of some kind. Sometimes people just wanted to escape. “Maybe it would have been too hard for him to say goodbye?” Not that he wanted to make excuses for the guy either. If Jason ever ran into him on the street someday he’s give him a piece of his mind.

“There are other fish in the sea. I dated...a lot....before stumbling, literally, into Nischal. Relationships are hard. Maybe you should try some things out first before trying something serious again? I know it might not be for you, but we could always go out some time, see what fish we can come across. I could give you some pointers, be a good wingman.” It’d been ages since he went out somewhere. His party life was behind him, a lot sooner than he would have every thought it would be.

“I assume so...I just wish he’d called or texted me...so I wouldn’t have found out the hard way.” That had been rather awkward, going to the building like a normal person and finding out the other had moved out. He was used to just mirror walking his way right in and powering down right away, so nothing would feel his signature and track it. “Maybe...maybe it would have been too hard...I hope so.” For his own sake really, it wasn’t that he needed the confidence boost but just to show that Kit cared. He knew Kit cared, he did, but he was hurting and it felt like Kit didn’t care as much as Xi had thought he had. A lot of it was likely in his own head, just his emotions getting to him, but he couldn’t help it.

“Did you really stumble into him?” Shifting a bit to look at the other, smiling. “I thought I was doing the unserious thing with Kit...and even that failed. I don’t know what to try now or if I should. Maybe it was better before?” When all he’d done was sleep and go to school, just add in work and senshi duties now, it would work - right? He’d be all good...maybe?

“It does suck that he couldn’t at least text you.” All the more reason Jason would be all the angrier if he ever saw him. There had to be some reason, he just hoped Kit wasn’t in any sort of trouble. Something could have happened to his phone. No one memorized numbers these days. “Maybe one day a mysterious letter will show up in a mailbox, oooo~” Joking, something he always turned to when things got serious. Maybe he would show back up some day, he just hoped Xi would have moved on by then.

Jason chuckled a bit thinking back to when he met Nischal. “I was new to the whole DMC thing, terribly awkward back then. I just saw a cute guy and yeah…” A little blush creeped across his face, “I was pretty sure I ran him away at first, but things worked out Somehow.” He could barely recall some cheesy pick up line in the beginning. My, how things had changed in a year and a half. “You should never give up though. That much I know for certain. It may take a few tries to get in right though. When it goes wrong you’ll always have us here to get you back on your feet.”

As much as he knew the letter in the mailbox comment to be a joke it was nice, to think that Kit might contact him somehow, eventually, maybe. That maybe he’d at least know what had happened to the other, and that he was ok. It would be nice to at least have some idea on what he’d missed, on what he hadn’t known about. “I don’t think he will...but it would be nice.” He answered, voice whisper soft for the moment. “Mmm, I miss him.” He missed a lot when it came to Kit actually, more than he was willing to tell anyone else.

“I’m still awkward and I’ve got wings like Nischal. I don’t think I’ll ever get over some things.” Not that he minded that. He was getting better with using his magic, and it was somehow stronger now, but he was never going to stop clinging to other court members and following them about. That wouldn’t change now, or ever, even with the addition of wings. He just knew he could help and do more for his court and that he was happy about, he wanted to do his best for the court which had become his family. They had done a lot for him.

“I’m glad it worked out - you both deserve it. You work well together.” And he still at times felt like the third wheel but it was getting better, much better. They were both good friends and he cared for them both, he wouldn’t waste precious sleep time on cooking for them both if he didn’t care.

“Maybe...maybe if I don’t try it’ll just happen? I don’t want to try...it hurts when it fails. But we can go out soon - food and shopping?” Since the other had offered Xi-Wang wasn’t about to turn the offer down.

“It’s okay to miss him.” Jason drew his arm in a bit to give Xi a little squeeze. He knew it hurt a lot right now, especially with everything else that was going on. It was nice to have friends when crazy things were happening in your life, but he knew that having a special someone could make all of that easier. Nichal and himself would just have to work harder to make up for that, and neither of them minded.

“I certainly needed someone like Nischal in my life. Someone to keep me on track.” He thought back to all the trouble he got into back in high school. Kailey would always be his best friend in the world, but they sure knew how to mess things up as teens. At least they were both on a better paths these days.

“That’s true. You tend to find the things you’re looking for most when you’re not even looking for them. Just know that failing is all part of the process. We all hate it, but we all go through it. Just don’t let it define you.” He couldn’t help but laugh at the suggestion they go get food and shopping. “We always turn to food in these situations! But, if it helps. It helps. I’m gonna get you a new hoodie. You need a new one.”