The next few days were quiet, as far as their lives could be at least. After that things seemed to return to mostly normal. Cornetite requested to be put on assignment more with the others and while Nitratine didn't complain he didn't always like his nights out as much any more. He came home with more bruises, injuries he hid from Halston, but he had asked for that.
-----
Despite everything else returning to normal Halston did keep declining invitations to go out, whether it was just with him or with Shea as well. It was acceptable at first but once the weeks started to drag on he got fed up with it. He dressed up for an evening out before heading over to Halstons, knocking on the door. He wasn't taking no for an answer this time.
He hit pause on the remote before lifting himself up off of the sofa, tussling his fingers through his hair on his way to the door. Off from work for the evening and having turned down the invitation to head out, he’d made himself comfortable in a pair of loose lounge pants and a muscle shirt. A mild look of indifference coupled with a dose of irritation lingered on his face as the door swung open.
“I’m afraid you’ve missed the club. It’s a few blocks in the other direction, Court.”
-----
“Well aware, go get dressed.” He slipped in past Halston’s arm, ducking inside before the other man could either stop him or close the door on him. He was all too happy to ignore the irritated look Halston gave him as he moved to lean against the arm of the sofa. “You’ve been ignoring invitations from both myself and Shea for long enough now. You’re coming out for a few drinks tonight.”
-----
“Don’t need a few drinks and if I did I could pour them right here from the comfort of my own flat without getting dressed.” He’d done so more than enough over the past week or so-- he’d had to replace one of his favorite bottles as a result. “I appreciate the invite, but still respectfully declining.”
-----
“You don’t get to decline this time Halston. This has gone on long enough. Go. Get. Dressed.” He knew Halston had, most likely, been overdoing it on the drinks at home and unlike him Halston didn’t keep wine around for that he had much harder liquor. “I’ll wait.”
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“Going to be waiting a bit. I was in the middle of a movie and I’m waiting for take-out.” He hadn’t actually made it as far as ordering food yet. That would have been the next thing on the agenda had there not been an untimely knock on his door. Courtland didn’t need to know that, though, even if his friend looked ready to call his bluff. “Honestly, go. Thought you’d had enough of me cramping your style.”
-----
“Bullshit, if you ordered food your wallet would be over by the door. You always tip delivery drivers in cash.” He didn’t care about whatever movie Halston could have been watching, whatever it was could be paused. “You’ve been avoiding everyone outside of work for weeks now and you’re done. You’re not spending another evening sitting in here drinking whatever bourbon you’ve picked up to replace the bottle I know you’ve already gone through.”
-----
It was obvious enough that Courtland wasn’t going to turn and walk back out the door so rather than continue to let the AC out he nudged it shut, letting it click behind him. “You spend most the nights we’re out telling me what s**t company I am and floating off to find someone else to talk to anyways. You made it pretty clear last time that I make a s**t wingman as well, so I don’t know what you’re hoping to get out of this, Court.”
-----
“Telling me you have nothing to tell me after you’ve been ignoring spending any more time in my company than absolutely necessary? No one at work to b***h about? No stories from being out with the birdies?.” He pointed down the hall toward Halston’s room. “Clothes are that way. Nice clothes.”
-----
For a brief moment he contemplated instigating further. He contemplated scooping up the remote and resuming his place on the couch, hitting play and snagging his phone to actually order take out. For an even briefer moment he thought it was a good idea to do just that.
In the end he cast an awful, irritated look in Courtland’s direction before heading to his room, slamming the door shut behind him.
-----
Coutland sighed once Halston was in his room, running a hand through his hair and going to turn off the television and put away the glass Halston had left on the table by his chair. He didn’t know why the other man was so irritated about going out with him, other than the fact that he’d been avoiding him since their fight last time. Not exactly the most adult way to handle things but he was done with waiting for Halston to pull his head out of his a**.
-----
He changed into something out of his ‘summer’ wardrobe; pants that were nice, but more casual and comfortable than Nice, pulling on a soft, vintage tee before snagging his blazer. He slid into a pair of loafers that, again, were more comfortable than fashionable, not bothering to check himself in the mirror as he pulled on his coat while heading out of his room. “Alright. Let’s get this over with.”
-----
He looked his friend over once he was back out of his room, eyes landing back on Halston’s for a moment with a decided look if disappointment in them. He was quite tempted to tell Halston that he looked like his brother but he did actually want the other man to come out with him. “You could try to look a little less annoyed that I want to spend time with you.” He walked back over to the door, holding it open so Halston would have to come with him.
-----
He snatched his wallet off the counter, tucking it into his back pocket while his keys went into his front pocket. The door locked behind them as Courtland stepped out into the hall once he’d made sure that he’d gone ahead of him. “Where are we going?”
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“Out for a few drinks.” He smirked before heading for the elevator. “I brought the porsche, do you want to drive?” If Halston was going to be an a** he was just going to act like everything was normal.
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“You’d have to tell me where we were going if you were going to let me drive, so I’ll save you the trouble and just say ‘no’ up front.” He leaned back against the elevator wall once inside, arms crossed over his chest least he reach back to hold on to the bar.
-----
“Wonderful thing about having a GPS system installed in the car is no I don’t.” He pressed the button for the lobby before leaning against the wall idly. The GPS was already programmed where he wanted to go so he wouldn’t even have to give Halston the address or name.
-----
“I’ll pass.” He was already irritable enough that he didn’t need to add following Courtland’s GPS in to the mix. It would be easy enough to put on a pair of shades and ignore wherever they were going if he wasn’t in the driver’s seat.
-----
When the elevator chimed on the correct floor he rolled his eyes and stepped out into the lobby. His heels clicked quietly on the floor as he headed out into the parking garage, making sure Hals was still following him. The keys were easy enough to dig out of his clutch and he slipped into the driver's seat after popping the doors open.
-----
He slid into the passenger side, drawing his favorite pair of blue shades out of his pocket to slip onto his face as he leaned back after buckling himself in. He was as ready as he was going to be at this rate, hoping vaguely that counted for something.
-----
“Really? Sunglasses?” He managed not to roll his eyes again as he turned on the car and pulled out of the garage. He wasn’t expecting an answer, not really, and focused on listening to the GPS. Their destination wasn’t that far thankfully so he wouldn’t have to put up with Halston pouting in his car for too long.
-----
He had at least known Hals wouldn’t be at all interested in going out to a bar or club, knowing he was likely to act exactly how he was acting, so he’d picked something a little more toward his friends tastes. He pulled the car into the valet lot of a Mediterranean tapas restaurant they had been to a few times over the years. It always had a nice atmosphere, live music, good food to nibble on, and a wonderful selection of home created cocktails and a well stocked bar.
-----
The question about his sunglasses wasn’t met with an answer, so it was fortunate that Courtland wasn’t expecting one. He closed his eyes for a moment or two before opening them, picking up on the familiar shift in traffic along with the streets they were turning onto. His demeanor softened slightly as he realized where they were going. He straightened himself up and even lifted his sunglasses up to rest in his hair as they pulled up to the valet stand. “If you’d told me this was what you had in mind I might have put up less of a fuss.”
-----
“Or you could have trusted that I wouldn’t take you somewhere that would make you miserable for the evening and not put up a fuss at all.” He looked over at Halston for a moment before slipping out of the car and exchanging his keys for a ticket at the stand. Once that was done he tucked the ticket away before holding out an arm for Halston to take.
-----
He glanced over to Courtland for a moment without saying anything, watching his friend’s face for a second or two longer before reaching up to pluck his sunglasses from his head. He tucked them back into his jacket pocket before accepting Courtland’s arm, guiding the other man towards the front door.
-----
Once they were inside he gave his name to the hostess and they were lead to a table quickly enough. Courtland was still expecting Halston to put up a bit of a fuss, or keep complaining, but he was glad the other man was there at least. He had missed having him around and hadn’t meant to push the other man away in the way he had.
-----
“We haven’t been here for a while,” he murmured. His voice was low, but at least he was trying to offer a bit of conversation instead of just acting like an accessory on Courtland’s arm. “Missed the atmosphere?”
-----
“I know you like the food and drinks here and would be more comfortable here than at a bar.” He slid into the booth, thanking the hostess as she set down the menus for them. “They have the bourbon you like on special tonight as well.”
-----
“Think I might go for something lighter tonight, depending on how long you’d like to stick around here… I’m open to suggestions.” He waited until Courtland was seated before helping himself to a seat across from the other man. “Do we need menus tonight?”
-----
“We usually order the same things when we’re here so unless you’ve changed your mind? No.” He settled into the seat, setting his clutch on the table out of the way. “As for how long I intended to stay out? I suppose that depends on you in a way Hals.” He looked up at his friend, letting his mask slip a little. “I wanted to talk to you, you’ve been avoiding me and …. I don’t like it. I miss you.”
-----
“We do, but you might have wanted something different.”He nudged the menu back towards the edge of the table, ready to order their usual spread whenever the waitress reappeared. He would take whatever suggestion she had on drink that evening, knowing he’d likely drink more water than anything else. “I haven’t been avoiding you. You said that you wanted to do things on your own and you rather heavily implied that you wanted space.”
-----
“You’ve been avoiding me.” Halston might not want to admit it but he had been, there was no way to pretend like he hadn’t been. “If i wanted ‘space’ I would have just told you that without any of the fuss. What I wanted was … I was just angry and upset. I didn’t want you to start acting like you don’t care about me.”
-----
“I’ve been busy and you know they like switching things up with our night job from time to time-- team building and all that?” It was a shitty, transparent excuse. He hadn’t specifically asked for a temporary reassignment, but he hadn’t exactly fought against it as hard as he might have any other time either. “You said you could take care of yourself-- I can’t step in all the time. Isn’t that also what you said?”
-----
“That’s because I can take care of myself.” He sighed, mask slipping back into place as the waitress came over with glasses of water and ready to take their orders. He let Halston take care of the food and ordered a glass of his favorite wine to go along with everything. When she was gone he reached for the water, ignoring his sleeve slipping a bit and hoping Hals wasn’t paying attention. “That doesn’t mean I wanted you to use every flimsy excuse you could come up with to stay away from me.”
-----
He reached out to gently take hold of the other man’s hand having spotted the bruise on his wrist, drawing it towards him so that he could reach out to nudge Court’s sleeve up a little higher. When he realized that it was a scrape and not fingerprints he let the other man have his hand back so that he could conceal the bruises again if he wanted to. “The Professor probably has something that could’ve helped you out with that… Are you alright?”
-----
He tensed slightly when Hals took his hand, expecting a harsh reaction to the mess his arms still were. When he was allowed to take it back he pushed the sleeve back into place. “He wasn’t all that concerned when it happened and I hate the way that stuff tastes.” He knew he could have eaten a starseed or one of the energy orbs and stayed powered up for a bit, his arms would have been fine, but at the time he hadn’t wanted to. “I’m fine. I’m sure it won’t be the worst thing that happens to me. Better get used to it.”
-----
“Pinkie might have been better to go to, then. Either way, you should have done something about it.” His brow furrowed as he looked to the other man, leaning back in his seat. “Is that the worst of it or is there more?”
-----
“I wasn’t exactly given a choice on the matter.” He ignored the question of there being more in favor of taking a sip of the water that had been brought. He had said he didn’t need Halston’s constant protection and he’d practically shoved him away the last time they’d really spoken. Whatever happened to him he deserved.
-----
He wanted to fuss over the other man some more but it wasn’t his place to, especially not if Courtland didn’t want to share any more details. He fell back into silence as he reached for his own glass of water, staring out past the other man to the lights at the bar.
-----
A month ago Halston would have fussed, would have gotten angry on his behalf. The fact that he didn’t proved how much his outburst had changed things between them. He set his glass down before settling back. “Tell me how your week has been, you’re working on a new show aren’t you?” Talking about work was safe and maybe he could get back a bit of what he had with Halston if he stayed with a safe topic.
-----
“It’s about that time of year for fall recitals… Then we’ll be in to holiday shows. Birdie put in a good word for me with the ballet, so this season might be a bit busier than usual.” His gaze remained distant for a moment, fingers dragging through the condensation on his glass. “Same stuff… Nothing all that interesting.”
-----
Courtland was thankful that even if his eyes watered his makeup would stay in place, perfect mask he could hide behind while he tried to convince himself he would be fine. Outside of his family pissing Hals off he couldn’t remember the last time he’d gotten such a short answer about the other man’s work. There was always something to say, someone to b***h about, some show he was hoping to get to work on. “You do always like the ballets.” He kept his voice even, dragging his gaze away from where Hals was ignoring him. It would have been better if Hals had just told him everything was over.
-----
“I like them more when we’ve got box seats and you’re watching one with me, but they’re one of my favorite stage performances to do the lighting for, yes.” He nodded, bringing his eyes back to the table. He didn’t need to mention that he’d seen every performance enough to know what happened on the stage, danced a dozen times over, giving him the chance to watch Courtland’s reaction more than the movement. That wasn’t something the other man needed to know.
“I’ll see what I can do about getting tickets for you and Shea-- probably not box seats, but…”
-----
“I am not sure Shea could sit still, and quiet, long enough to actually enjoy a ballet. He’d probably enjoy a theatre performance more.” The waitress came back with their drinks as he spoke, dropping them off and letting them know their food would be out shortly. “And I have season tickets to the theatre already Hals, I only upgrade them to box seats when we go see something together.”
-----
“He might surprise you. Wouldn’t know unless you asked, yeah?” His brow lofted as he looked to the other man, tapping idly on the table as it gave him something to do with his hands. “What have you been up to?” It was a dangerous question-- it hadn’t always been one, but it felt like one now. The answer could be the usual or Court could start telling him all about some person he’d met.
-----
“What am I always up to? I’ve been working. I had a photo shoot last week and I’ve got a couple videos in the process of being edited so they can be uploaded. Same as usual.” He had a few other projects lined up and was working on another side to his business so he could, hopefully, pull back from the videos a bit, but most of it was still in technical phases and didn’t make for any sort of good conversation. “Everything else has been rather boring and lonely since someone has been doing their level best to have as little to do with me as possible.”
-----
The slight edge in Courtland’s tone stung more than he might have let it under other circumstances. If it had been any other time, if he hadn’t been trying so hard to act like none of this was bothering him… He closed his eyes, jaw clenched and lips pressed together, face taking on a light flush as though the words had been an actual slap. He took a deep breath, releasing it slowly as he shook his head. “I don’t know if I can do this right now, Courtland.”
-----
He couldn’t even deny it. Couldn’t even pretend it wasn’t true. “Fine. She said the food would be here shortly so you can eat some and finish your drink and I’ll take you back home.” They could sit in silence or go back to pretending they cared about whatever idle chit chat they came up with just to get through the meal and not waste the restaurant's time.
-----
He opened his eyes to look to the other man again, not sure he’d be able to trust himself with any further conversation. He didn’t want to make a scene. Courtland hadn’t wanted to make a scene before. Neither of them wanted or needed to have this conversation. “If we’re done after this I can find my own way home-- could’ve just stayed at my place, the both of us, and sat in silence without going somewhere nice to just make a fuss in public. I don’t know what you want,Court.”
-----
“What fuss in public? I’m not making a fuss, you’re not either, and no one is paying attention to our conversation.” Neither of them had raised their voices so there was no reason for anyone to pay them any mind. “You don’t need to find your own way home, I can drop you off just as easily and you don’t have to pay someone for the ride.” He tried to keep his tone flat but he couldn’t quite keep the edge of sadness out of it. “I wanted to have dinner and talk to you. You don’t want to do that so I am sorry I tried to force it on you. I won't do it again.”
-----
“So you want to have dinner and talk, but you’re going to take whatever opportunity you can to slide into conversation that I’ve been avoiding you or that I want nothing to do with you when you’re the one who told me to mind my own business and step back? It doesn’t work that way, Courtland. You can’t just…” He didn’t know what he was saying, or what he should be saying. Words weren’t his strong suit. Words had been taken away from him when he was younger, convinced that the best way around them was actions and outbursts. “I can’t just…. I don’t know how to be different around you, so maybe it’s just best that I’m not.”
-----
Courtland was quiet for a bit, looking less like the proud and confident person he always seemed to be and more like the young man who’d clawed through hell most of his life to get where he was. “Halston, have you ever thought about why you don’t know how to be different around me? Why do you want to protect me when you know I can handle myself? Why do you get so angry when someone else touches me, tries to get too familiar with me? Because I know what I want the answer to be but …. “ But Halston didn’t think like everyone else, wasn’t like everyone else, so while Courtland would have known the answer had it been anyone else but with Halston he was always second guessing the other man’s feelings and intentions.
-----
“Because you’re you and you’ve always been so unashamedly you.” He murmured, wishing that they were back at his apartment, or sitting around in Courtland’s den and not out in public where anyone else could see him. “You can handle yourself, but you shouldn’t have to do it alone.” Not when he was there to look out for him. “I get upset because they don’t know you-- they just see what you want them to see and you deserve better than that. You are better than that and I don’t know why you don’t see it.”
-----
“I haven’t always been like this. I’m only like this because I spent most of my school life, ********, most of my life up until the last few years, being called disgusting names because I liked wearing make-up and wearing dresses and refused to tell people what gender I am. I finally got sick and tired of people trying to shove me in a box so I just started shoving it all in their faces so they had to deal with it.” And somehow Halston had come into his life and not run away, at least not from him. He could see what he deserved though, they were sitting right across from him, but they couldn’t see what they were allowed to have. He paused as the waitress came by with their food, dropping it off and thankfully not paying attention too much attention to them. “.... what do you think i deserve then?”
-----
“Someone who knows you, or is at least interesting in getting to know you. Someone who is going to support you, even if you don’t need it. Someone who’s there for you…” And one day Courtland would find someone like that and he wasn’t sure there’d still be a place for him in the other man’s life when he did. He didn’t know if he could remain civil through that trial period of waiting to see if some p***k was going to stick around. “You deserve better than the sort of s**t you let try to pick you up in bars.”
-----
Courtland managed a small laugh, shaking his head before running his fingers through his hair. “I already have that Halston …” The problem was Halston didn’t ever seem to notice he did those things, he always assumed someone else should be doing it without realizing it already happened. That could explain a bit of why he acted the way he did though. Expecting others to live up to the standard he set without realizing that was what he was doing. “You described yourself.”
-----
“And you don't think whatever p***k you pick up at a bar shouldn't offer you the same considerations that a friend might?” His eyes narrowed, a bit of that irritation coming back. “You've got one hell of a way of looking at things-- you can't supplement relationships that way. Court.”
-----
“I don't want to supplement anything, I want you to pull your head out if your a**!” He snapped, eyes sharp for a moment before they softened. “God Halston, what did they do to you that you can't even see that you're … if you think I deserve those things why can't … why do you think it has to be someone else.”
-----
It took a lot to make Halston O’Hea shrink back. Since growing out of being a scrawny kid in his early teen years, he’d found a better way to carry himself-- convincing himself that he didn’t care how others viewed him, that he could feign indifference often enough that it would just stick. What he didn’t care about couldn’t bother him.
Being around Courtland made things different. He could let just a bit of who he was beneath the guise show through because Courtland made it alright to do so. It generally meant that he managed a smile here or there more frequently, or that he was permitted small outbursts of emotion. In this case it meant that he flinched when the other man snapped at him from across the table, sinking back slightly in his seat as though it might help him disappear in the event anyone’s attention was drawn there way.
“The food’s going to get cold,” not that he was hungry, or that it wouldn’t be just as good if it wasn’t steaming. He just needed a distraction and he didn’t know how to put words to that.
-----
“So eat some of it.” He was still angry Halston couldn’t get out of his own head to actually hear what he was saying and that bled into his voice. He picked up his wine to take a drink almost wishing it was something harder. Courtland was used to Halston being more open with him and actually listening to him so he didn’t really understand why he wasn’t doing so now. Halston was smarter than that, would have been if his family weren’t the assholes they were, and if he’d just think for a moment would be able to figure out what Courtland was talking about.
-----
He reached over to snag a piece of flatbread, picking at it and pulling apart the edges without actually eating any of it as he fell quiet again. Mentally he was kicking himself over somehow thinking that coming here might have meant they’d be able to find a bit of normalcy and maybe they’d be able to forget about the tension lingering between them.
-----
Courtland watched Hals for a moment before reaching over and setting his hand atop his friends. “Stop that, put some of the pesto on it and actually eat it.” His voice was soft this time, something closer to the tone he would use when Halston was having a bad day and he was trying to give him something softer to focus on. “You’ll regret it later when your stomach is growling because you didn’t feed it. Or better yet get some of the sun dried tomato paste and a bit of the chicken.”
-----
He released the bit of bread he was still holding on to in order to turn his hands in the other man’s. He held on to them for a moment, giving Court’s hands a gentle squeeze before releasing them. “I’ll eat if you do… We’ll finish dinner, get a bottle of wine to go and head back to my place if you want to talk after that. I’ll try-- If I don’t you can snap and yell all you want and there won’t be anyone to mind but me.”
-----
“I intended to eat at least a bit.” That was part of why he’d wanted to bring Hals out to dinner in the first place. He knew neither of them would have eaten yet and he had hoped they could talk over dinner. When his hand was free he gathered a few vegetables on a flat bread so he could actually nibble on something. The food was too good to go to waste and if the night was going to be as long as he thought it would be they'd both need fuel for the fire.
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