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 Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2018 4:30 pm
 Ophion had arrived at the Rosy Kettle, and ordered his favorite hot chai tea latte. They did such an amazing job... And lovely muffins. He had gotten a small plate with a selection of a few, and had already cut into the fresh, hot blueberry muffin that was his favorite, and spread the wonderful honey butter that accompanied the muffins onto it. His hands were resting around his warm cup, as he watched people coming and going, wondering when his online friend would arrive. He had been a little early, to be sure they could get a table, and now he had to wait.
He had gotten lucky, though. He'd gotten a corner table that had a good view of the café, and did not hide him away behind a counter or something... But did provide some privacy, and no one could sneak up on the people using it from behind. The seats were squashy armchairs, and the table was just the right height for the chairs in question. He sighed softly, and lifted his cup to his lips, taking a slow sip as he waited, quietly.
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Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2018 10:43 pm
 The Rosy Kettle...that was where Yaruka was to meet a friend from online. This was more than nervewracking for the fallen. She had never met someone from the internet before and the idea of meeting people in general had been terrifying on its own lately. Still....she needed a reason to leave her dorm. She had grown so accustomed to staying within its walls except for meals and to get essentials for her familiars, always avoiding eye contact with people and staying quiet; it wasn't good to be so avoidant but she almost couldn't stop herself. Despite her instincts to remain indoors, she knew she had no reason thus far not to believe that meeting her online friend would be a bad thing. They had been nice so far and she hoped they would continue to be. Now she had found the place and as she stood outside looking at the face of it, she was feeling the anxiety creep up again. This was an unfamiliar place....with unfamiliar people....but it looked cute, cozy and warm. Her friend had assured they were very hallowed-accepting, too. Tugging her hooded jacket around her a little tighter, Yaruka took a deep breath and stepped inside, pulling her hood back to let her long silvery hair bounce around her freely.
It smelled amazing in here! The music was relaxing...the sounds of a typical coffee shop almost delightful to her ears....and as she looked around she saw smiling faces from the staff and some of the patrons. She offered a small smile back and stepped up to the counter, ordering a hot white chocolate mocha. Once that was ordered, she looked around a bit for the person described....and there he was, sitting at a nice corner table. Seeing him in person and realizing that yes, he was real, made Yaruka's stomach do a nervous flip. Well...here goes nothing. Her wings twitched a bit as she walked over to the elf, really hoping he was who she thought he was and that she wasn't about to make things awkward with a stranger. "H-hi......um....a-are you...Past?" She stammered quietly, trying her best not to look as nervous as she felt. "I'm...heavenlyhallowed13." She offered a smile to him, shoulders shrugged up a bit as she watched for his reaction.
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Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2018 10:56 pm
He saw the young woman walk in, and when her hood came off, saw enough to realize she matched the description he had been given in the chat room. He watched her walk to the counter, and order. He watched her wait. He realized he might be being a little creepy, but he wanted to give her the chance to approach.
He felt like that might be better for her, for her issues, if she got up the courage to approach... because she would know, for the future, she COULD do it.
When she picked up her drink and turned around, he waited patiently. At her approach, and her words, he gave her a bright and welcoming smile. "I am, indeed. But here, and now, you can call me Ophion." He stood up, and went to pull the other chair out for her. The least he could do, really, was try to make her as comfortable as possible. "It is wonderful to meet you in person for the first time. I hope... this meeting works out well, and we can do it again. I would like to have friends, people I can just spend time with, that are not my children."
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Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2018 11:25 pm
She still couldn't believe she was doing this....but here she was, warm cup of drink in her hands as she watched the elf and hoped she was right. When he smiled and confirmed it, her shoulders relaxed quite a bit and she seemed to let out a held breath in relief. Her smile got a bit brighter and she laughed nervously. "Ophion....that's great...I-I mean, it's...great to finally meet you. Oh...and you can call me Yaruka." She felt she might be babbling a bit already. Damn her nerves.
"Oh...thank you." Yaruka was pleasantly surprised when he pulled the chair out for her, smiling at him as she took a seat in the squishy thing that was practically beckoning to her. "I hope the same thing. I mean, it's a good start; I found the right person." She smiled with a small joking giggle. "I think it'd be...really nice to have people to hang out with....and I mean actively, not just being the quiet weirdo on the side who happens to be there with everyone else." That...was supposed to be a joke at her own expense to help lift some of her anxiety but now she just felt kind of stupid for saying it. A bit of pink flushed into her cheeks and she looked to the side. "S-sorry.....that sounded funnier in my head. I guess I'm more nervous than I thought.." She took a sip of her drink to stop herself from yammering for a moment and to collect her words properly. She cleared her throat before she looked back up at him, still smiling a bit. "You were right about this place. It's really lovely and everyone seems so warm...if that makes sense." She didn't know how else to describe it. Dammit, Yaruka, stop being nervous now please.
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Posted: Thu Apr 05, 2018 11:47 pm
"A pleasure, Yaruka. I am glad to put a face to the personality I have come to consider a friend." He gave her a beaming smile, and once she was seated, gently slid it forwards, before going back to his own seat. "If you would like a muffin, I have several. I ordered a small selection. I am sorry to say I snagged the blueberry already... It is very much my favorite, even if, perhaps, the more gentlemanly thing to do would have been to wait and let you have the first pick."
He settled back, and picked up his fork, before taking a piece of his fresh, warm buttered muffin. "However, sometimes I admit that I am not a gentleman. Blueberry muffins, for instance, especially Rosy Kettle Blueberry Muffins, trigger my not gentlemanly side. I am very fond of them, and only my daughters are ever able to wheedle them out of me. Otherwise, if I order one, no matter how good my intentions might start... I end up being the one to eat it."
He focused on her, and her joke, and his brows rose a little. "Yaruka... You don't have to be self deprecating for me to like you, or mock yourself, you know that, yes?" He gave her a warm grin and reached over to, very gently, pat the hand on her cup. "I liked the person you showed me on the internet, and I believe I will like the person I meeting today. You don't have to feel awkwards. Just talk to me like you would the person on the other side of the internet. Because that's all I am."
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Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2018 3:29 am
Hearing his words and seeing that beaming face of his brought warmth to her heart. She just smiled warmly and thanked him again when he slid her chair back in, watching him as he returned to his seat. Upon hearing his adoration for the blueberry muffins, she giggled lightly; it was the weirdest combination of cuteness and eloquence she'd ever heard. "It's alright; thank you for sharing and I will keep in mind to not get between you and your muffin of choice." She smiled as she looked at the variety he had gotten. "One can't have perfect etiquette at all times." She found one that looked like it had chocolate chips and took it to carefully cut it in half, taking one of them for herself to put some butter on. "I'm a bit of a chocolate fiend myself when rational.....and a chocolate monster when I am not." She just smiled at the later part of that statement as she grabbed a fork to dig in.
When Ophion reminded her that she didn't need to make such jokes for him to like her, Yaruka's gaze drifted down and to the side. 'I...I know i don't have to...it's just hard to stop a habit, I suppose." She looked up at him when he pat her hand, giving him a small smile and shaking her head as she listened to him. "I'm trying...but it's weird how a face and a name added to the experience can change how it feels. I know you're still the same person I've been talking to all this time. I guess it's that layer of intangeability the internet adds..kind of like a buffer. I really am happy to finally see you, though. I mean, I've been wanting to meet in person for quite a while...so I'm just hoping that my reality regarding me in the eyes of others isn't disappointing."
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Posted: Fri Apr 06, 2018 2:01 pm
Ophion laughed at her reaction to his discussion regarding blueberry muffins, in a light, friendly way, glad she wasn't bothered by the fact that he'd done so. He took another bite of his wonderful, delicious muffin, which tasted so perfect with the honey butter melting into it, before he spoke again. "I do love chocolate as well... But I can generally share my chocolate. These muffins..." He sighed, ate another bite. "That fresh blueberry flavor, mixing with the sweet muffin and than Rosy Kettle's Honey Butter... I just can't help myself. They're like mouthfuls of heaven, and only a buck fifty per. And they make them fresh EVERY day."
He paused, than said in a tone that sounded doubtful as to how it could be possible, "and the leftovers, whatever there are, go to local homeless shelters. I don't know how there can be leftovers, with how wonderful these muffins and their other treats are, but... there it is."
He continued to eat as she spoke, taking occasional sips of his chai, and listening with a silently thoughtful look on his face. Finally, he nodded. "I can understand that. It's sort of why we're here, though, isn't it? To help fight the nerves and discomfort of meeting strangers... Start with a not exactly stranger and work up." He gave her a small smile. "But I am glad you wanted to meet. I found myself thinking that you were a wonderful friend, and I wanted to make it a more... more tangible friendship. I can't hug a person through a computer, after all." He looked sad for a moment, and lost in thought, before he shook his head, almost violently, as if to shake the cobwebs out of his mind and let him refocus on the discussion at hand, and Yaruka herself. "You can do this, my dear friend. You can do this, and will. I believe in you."
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Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2018 2:20 am
Yaruka just smiled as she observed him enjoying his muffin. He looked happy...and that made her feel a little more at ease. She giggled quietly as he spoke about the muffins like they were coveted treasures whose temptation he couldn't resist. "Any good baker knows that most goods are best when fresh.....unless it's day old bread. Then it's good for things like croutons, stuffing and crumbs for either fry breading or meatloaf." She ate the bite of muffin and was happily met with warm, buttery, melty chocolate sweetness. If this was what it was like with him and his blueberry muffins, then she could understand. When he mentioned that they gave their leftovers to homeless shelters, she smiled brightly. "It's wonderful that whatever does get left behind goes to a good cause." it suddenly occurred to her that perhaps she was focusing too much on her own feelings and not his. That wasn't fair...nor was it true to her nature. She was concerned for him, too.
She sipped on her mocha as he responded to her spoken thoughts, listening to him and observing him. She nodded as what he said made some sense; they weren't completely strangers since they had talked to each other before. In a way, they were in the same boat; he didn't see people much either, apart from his daughters. Maybe someone could understand her, even just a little. Hearing him call her a wonderful friend again made her smile sheepishly, glancing to the side. She still didn't know if she was or not...but that didn't mean that she didnt want to be. When he paused in speaking, she looked up and saw the sadness in his face. She could imagine he was thinking of the person who he talked about before....someone she had an idea of but didn't speak her thoughts. It must have hurt him deeply and she frowned seeing the sadness on his face. Yaruka moved her hand to instinctively reach over and touch his but she stopped the moment she saw him shaking his head, pulling it back to wrap around her cup.
His words of encouragement were uplifting to hear....especially since she never heard them from herself or in her own thoughts. She smiled warmly at him and nodded. "I want to believe that....not just for me but for you, too. We both have things to overcome...and I want to believe that we will somehow." She really did want to believe his words and her own. Seeing his sadness in his eyes made her heart hurt. "We've taken a key first step and moved beyond the veil of the internet. For a while I thought I'd always be too afraid to step beyond that and look at faces again....but I'm here, looking at you and I don't feel that fear. I'm nervous...but not afraid, if that makes sense." It did to her, at least. She was still nervous but even this small moment of time with Ophion had shown her enough to ease the fear she had felt up to the moment she stepped through the Rosy Kettle's door. "I hope that I'm not making you uncomfortable at all. We've both been having a hard time and I want to make sure that you are feeling at ease, too."
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Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2018 7:44 am
Ophion blinked and listened as he ate, not really knowing much about baking. As he'd mentioned before, on the chat, he was NOT good at baking. His attempts tended to end up burnt when he got distracted by something, like a line of code he was trying to debug. This sort of thing was news to him, curious and fascinating but entirely not something he felt he would properly understand. Though, he did understand that fresher baked goods always tasted better. "It's not something I have a lot of experience with, on the baking side. I'm just not one for baking. I can cook if it's something that takes my focus, but anything that involves sticking it in the oven for a period of time is at risk of becoming charcoal."
He paused, than grinned wide. "But conversely, my tempura is amazing. Probably because it's NOT something you can ignore for long, or disaster occurs in an instant."
He refocused on her, and the current situation they were in. He'd seen the hand, and chose not to comment, though it warmed him that she had tried to do that. "It is important, yes. Coming here is... not so hard, for me, on the level of getting out..." His hands drifted to brush along the chain-like tattoo on his face for a moment, a VERY absent gesture. "It's more a worry about that other person I spoke of. The... situation we were both in lasted for a number of years, and did a great deal of damage to us both. I... seem to have overcome it more effectively than he has, but I never want to hurt him." His hands dropped from the tattoo, almost like it was suddenly hot, when he realized he was touching it. "But it does mean that I avoid trying to go where he might be. He was once one of the two most important people in my life. I work to overcome my past, and I have mostly learned to live with it... I just hate risking his pain."
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Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2018 10:15 am
Yaruka smiled as he mentioned again he wasn't one for baking and she nodded. "I remember you mentioning it before. Sometimes it's not just for everyone." Truthfully she wanted test him by coming up with a way he could bake successfully but that was shelved for now. He mentioned tempura and she laughed a little bit. "Now that is something I haven't tried yet myself....mostly because I haven't wanted to risk setting my dorm on fire in an accident. I'd like to try eventually.
She was quiet as he talked and observant as ever, seeing his hand tracing over the tattoo on his face and wondering if its significance was good or bad. She listened quietly and nodded as he brought up the person he had spoken about before once again. After a moment of silence when he finished talking, she looked into her cup thoughtfully, ears and wings twitching as her brows furrowed and rose as she tried to process whatever she was thinking.
"I don't mean to sound presumptuous and I apologize if I do....but perhaps avoidance is not the best solution." This was probably going to sound like she was preaching to the choir and she didn't look up from her cup. "Sometimes avoiding a source of pain can be an effective solution in the beginning....but as important to you as he was, and likely you to him as well, then after a time it might hurt more and not allow for any kind of closure for either of you." She finally looked up at him again, seeming a little troubled and sad. "You still care for him a great deal and his pain resonates with you....and perhaps he still cares for you, which is why the memories pain him as well. As I said before....you both have to live your lives and your paths will likely cross again. It doesn't have to be today or tomorrow or even months from now....but once whatever time that has passed is considered enough, it may be a good idea for you two to talk." She glanced to the side and one hand shifted under the sleeve of her jacket, feeling over a beaded bracelet she never took off if she could help it. "....It's going to hurt....you're both going to be afraid....but you can understand each other more from your shared experience. Maybe if he knows that you still hurt like he does, it will help him move forward....and you, as well. To lose someone who was so important to you, even in a bad situation, can be just as painful as the situation itself....and you may not even know it." She looked up at him again and cleared her throat, blushing slightly as she realized she spoke more than she originally meant to. "I'm sorry....I may have gotten carried away with what I was trying to say. I just....don't like to see you so sad."
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Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2018 4:53 pm
"We all have our own skills, in the end. I wish I was someone with the skills to bake, but I just get too distracted, and iit would be best if I not attempt it. I don't want to risk burning down my kitchen someday, when I got too distracted and did not notice the burning smell in time." He gave a self deprecating smile, not mocking himself, just acknowledging that if he got too caught up in his work, he KNEW what could come of that. "And ah! Yes, dorms are... perhaps not the best place for such things. Perhaps once you... get yourself settled, you'll have a kitchen you can try frying in. I enjoy it, and it's fairly lightly fried, so it's not so heavy, but it IS delicious."
He sighed happily and leaned back, taking another sip of his chai as he thought about it. "And because it's fried, it tends to be quick. Best had fairly fresh out of the fryer, of course. Dipping sauces can enhance it, but if you use good ingredients, it's just as tasty on it's own. I love purple sweet potato tempura, for instance, with a light salt and pepper seasoning in the batter."
His eyes widened as she spoke and he froze, trying to figure out how to explain why this was NOT a good idea, without talking too much about what happened, what was done, and though he never said it to anyone, how responsible he felt he was for what happened, even though he knew they had not had much in the way of choice in the matter. Finally, his pale skin even paler, he said "This is a situation where it would be best for him to reach out to me, or not at all. The damage that was done to us involved things I was made to do TO him. He has reason to be scared of me, and not want to see me." His voice was stiff with discomfort, not rejecting her or her care, but because he hated getting this close to the details of what had been done, what he had done...
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Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2018 10:04 pm
"I would like to at least attempt it at somr point. I could challenge myself a little once in a while." Yaruka smiled but didn't mention how she was concerned with finding a place. She knew she would probably find a roommate to be with till she got some kind of stability established. "You make it sound so nice that I can hardly wait to try it." She doubted she would have his skill yet but maybe he could eventually advise her.
She immediately regretted speaking up when she saw his reaction. Developed instinct told her to keep quiet but she didn't listen and now she had made a mistake. The anxiety was creeping back up and she slowly seemed to shrink, ears disappearing more into her hair and her wings folding tightly againsy her. Why did she have to open her mouth and try to offer advice when she already knew she was not qualified? She shrugged her shoulders up a bit and looked down into her cup, focusing on the remainder of her mocha and looking at her reflection. She was...so stupid. "....I'm sorry....it's none of my business. I don't...know what I was...." She swallowed thickly and shook her head. "Don't listen to me. This...is exactly why I wouldn't be a good therapist. You'll do whatever you feel is best and...I just hope it works out for both of you eventually. You both deserve that much, at least."
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Posted: Sat Apr 07, 2018 10:43 pm
"You will be good at it, I am sure. If you can bake successfully, I am sure tempura will be no great challenge to you." He seemed positive of this, even if perhaps he was no expert, given that he was a terrible baker. "It is wonderful, though. And not so complex that I think you would have trouble." He shrugged and grinned. "Once you have a kitchen of your own, maybe I can invite you over to meet at least one of my girls, and than I can teach you how to make it." The words were said innocently, and meant just as innocently. He saw a friend in the other hallowed, and wanted to make sure this friendship would last.
He brushed a lock of his hair from his face, as he worked to calm himself... And than he saw how she was withdrawing, reacting badly, and he sat straight up, reaching over to grab one of her hands gently.
"Yaruka. Don't apologize. You were being a friend, trying to give advice because you care." His heterochromatic eyes focused on her green ones. "You don't know the story of my past, his past. I don't talk about it much, because there is a lot of pain, and a lot of... other things in it that makes it complex and painful. It... we lost the only family we knew, because of it, but you have no way of knowing that. I think, if there is a mistake you are making, it's equating how a friend would react to how a therapy client might. There are reasons therapists don't take those they know as clients... It's too difficult for both sides. You are my friend, so you are emotionally involved. I appreciate the care you have shown me, by trying to help."
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Posted: Sun Apr 08, 2018 12:43 pm
Hearing how it seemed fairly simple and his confidence in her ability to have no issue with it, the idea of trying it out one day seemed more feasible. When he mentioned possibly one day inviting her over to teach her how to make it, she smiled rather brightly compared to what she had been showing thus far. "Thank you. I'd love to meet your girls and I would really appreciate you teaching me. Sometimes I learn best by with the active assistance of someone else rather than written instructions and me blindly experimenting. I think it could be fun. She vaguely remembered when she was younger having fun making things with others, even if they didn't turn out the way you intended.
Yaruka was trying to think....trying to process in her mind where she had gone wrong. She hadn't tried to pry further than he explained or try to sound like she knew more than anyone else....but it wasn't the first time the subject had come up and it was clearly something very touchy. She just wished she had remembered then and not now, after the fact. Another moment she had succumb to foot-in-mouth disease, it seemed. When he grabbed one of her hands suddenly, she jumped a bit as the unexpected gesture startled her but she did not retreat from him, looking up into his eyes as he spoke.
"You don't have to explain....and I won't ask you to talk about something that causes you that much grief. I understand from what you've said so far that it's very difficult....and I don't want to taint our experience of meeting one another with the same pain from the past." He wasn't wrong with how she reacted and she shook her head with a bitter smile. "That's the problem; I don't think I can separate myself emotionally. I care about others, regardless of how short the time I've known them....I 'love too easily', as they say. I don't know how else to be..." She shrugged a little and sighed. "Combine that with.....depression, anxiety and agoraphobia and you have the reasons why I've learned that my original goal choice in life was not really...practical." She looked down at her hand that he was holding, lost in thought for a moment before she gave him a gentle squeeze. "I know that this meeting has not been as smooth as we might have hoped....but that doesn't stop me from wanting to still see you more. Whatever our issues may be, I feel like having a physical friendship is a step in a better direction, even if times aren't always happy. Friends are there for each other through difficult times as much as they are for good times." She looked up at him again and offered a small smile, trying to let him know that she didn't think badly of him for the way things were.
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Posted: Sun Apr 08, 2018 11:48 pm
"Than I look forwards to the day I can teach you. I am sure we will both enjoy ourselves." He brushed his long bangs back, letting the colorful locks catch on his ears as a way to hold them back some. "Cooking is fun, I will not deny it. I just need the recipes that keep me focused." He leaned back in his comfortable chair, enjoying the way the squashy filling shifted to conform to his body more, and sighed a little. "I haven't cooked with another person in... many years. I don't recall the last time I did so."
He controlled his expression, still looking hopeful for that future date. Inside, though, was wistful melancholy and memories of what he had once hoped would be his life, with Mama and Llyr. They had been so young... But the last time he had cooked with another person, not counting the people who had given him the basic lessons on HOW to cook, before sending him off to university once he was deemed stable, was Mama, and he remembered how wonderful that had been.
When she spoke again, he was able to come out of those thoughts, grateful he had kept his expression from betraying where his mind had gone. "I appreciate you being willing not to bring it up again. If you really want to find out more, just... look up news from about four or so years ago, about an extremely horrible lab that got busted. The articles kept names out of it, but they mention enough that you can tell it's me, if you know me, and... well, they reveal LOTS of what happened." He closed his eyes for a moment, and sighed. "I don't talk about it. I won't. But maybe if you read the articles, you will understand why his trauma is what it is."
He reopened his eyes, and refocused on her side of the issues. "Well, even if being a therapist is no longer going to work, you have other skills, and I believe you can get past those three issues holding you back. You're stronger than them, not the other way around. You fought the agoraphobia today, just to come see me. And the anxiety, too. You can keep doing that. We can. As your friend, I will happily meet you again, to help you try to battle these. Maybe we can find others from the chat who would join us, or meet you at other times, to help as well."
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