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[Q] Petit-Prince of Hawks

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iStoleYurVamps

iStoleYurVamps


Trash Husband

PostPosted: Mon Jan 08, 2018 7:19 pm


Name: Tobias Red

Nickname:

Age: 20

Birthday: March 15th

Sign: Pisces

Gemstone: Rock crystal

Blood Type: o+

Fav. Food: None

Hated Food: None

School: N/A

Hobbies:

Hiking If there is a path, he will walk it. Maybe run if he's being chased by a bear but- Tobias loves going on hikes on rural trails and is known to sometimes to backpacking aka walk too much to camp for the night.

Sleeping Let him rest. He doesn't have a medical condition, but he really likes to cat nap. Anywhere. Including on trails when he should be hiking to the camping grounds. He just likes taking naps.

Virtues:

Confident Few things rattle Tobias, and he feels he has the skills to do most things. If he knows he doesn't he thinks he can figure it out with enough time. A man who lives by the idea that so long as you put your mind to it, you can do anything.

Adventurous Being confident also leaves one with a lack of fear and a desire to seek out new challenges and sights. Not the type to stick to any one thing or be content, Tobias seeks the new, the untried, untested. New is his favorite thing.

Flaws:

Petulant No is not in Tobias's vocabulary. Pouting, scoffing, he acts childish when told no or rebuffed. He typically fails to see how his actions or words could be in the wrong and when told, he tends to not accept that. At all.

Arrogant Anything you can do, I can do to. With a drive to learn and test himself and prove himself, leaves a ,man rather.. egotistical. Thinking himself naturally better than others for his endless drive, Tobias often fails to see how his pride is a big bigger than his actual skill.


PHYSICAL DESCRIPTION

premade
PostPosted: Mon Jan 08, 2018 7:20 pm


Senshi: Petit-Prince

Challenge: [SCREAM]

Sailor Scout Attack: Red Wings
Yelling (or screaming) while casting, Omega swipes towards his enemy, sending a gust of powerful wind in their direction. It's strong enough to knock you over and back a few feet but not much else. Can be used twice in battle.

Super Sailor Scout Attack: Black Talons
Yelling (or screaming) while casting, Omega swipes towards his enemy, sending a gust of powerful wind in their direction. It's strong enough to knock you over and back a few feet and will knock the wind out of a target, leaving them feeling dizzy while they recover from the blow. At player discretion, the magic may also cause bruising or three long, somewhat deep lacerations, as if they had been attacked by a bird’s talon. Can be used twice in battle.

Eternal Sailor Attack: Silent Kill
Pushing off of a surface, Omega's speed greatly increases, allowing him to swiftly move from one location to the next. He cannot move other people and is limited to roughly 50ft- he can only move in a straight line. (think quicksilver fast but not able to see slowmo, just zip zip straight line) Can be used twice in battle.


iStoleYurVamps

iStoleYurVamps


Trash Husband



LP


Kawaii Bear

29,500 Points
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PostPosted: Tue Jan 16, 2018 11:27 pm


iStoleYurVamps


Congrats on Tobias vamps. I have a few things I'd like to touch on before I can stamp him.

The first is unfortunately he can't be named after a Nebula, so he'll need a new name and I think he was dropped with the name Alderbaran - which might have been accidental typo of aldebaran, but there's also already a senshi aldebaran; so he'll need a name that's not one of those.

Okay so also with the attacks could you add how many uses each attack has, how long each attack lasts like 25 for basic, 30 for super, and 40 for eternal? Also for the super attack I noticed you wanted him to cause damage, would you please make that optional so that it disappears after the attack ends, unless the player wants to keep the lacerations for a longer period of time? Also the 50 foot straight line is unfortunately too large for an eternal senshi, if you wouldn't mind tweaking that down to 20 foot straight line it should be fine that way.
PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2018 1:24 am


I'm a bit at a loss @ name since no where in the guild or any form does it say senshi cannot be named after nebulas? A nebula is a celestial body- Unless the it's in a place that is not easy to be seen/cannot be publicly found I'm just unsure at where this rule is located.

The attacks are not lasting so I'm confused at giving it lasting times- They're knock back moves, designed to disengage or send someone crashing into objects/away. As far as how many times-add that in ty.

Lacerations has me a bit ??? as well.
Attacks not having lasting environmental damage was deemed a newer thing but it makes 0 sense to have actual physical damage vanish. If that was the case for any magic induced physical injury, then senshi would be entirely useless, as nothing they do would have any effect on their enemy whatsoever outside of brute physical force. I did put 'It can cause' not, 'it will also cause'. So it is a non issue anyway?

50ft is what the attack is intended for. 20ft is not a long enough distance to get away entirely from a conflict or to avoid a large AoE attack. It's not an attack that damages or can be used to move others. The purpose of the 'attack' is to move himself either into a better position, or to escape from a battle entirely. That's all it does.

LP


iStoleYurVamps

iStoleYurVamps


Trash Husband



Kyuseisha no Hikari

Crew

Dragonslaying Dragon

PostPosted: Wed Jan 17, 2018 8:57 am


Hi, Vamps!

I’m just going to drop in because I have a little more information! A nebula is not actually a celestial body, it is a celestial object! There is some clarification here but for ease of access, we will add to the character creation thread that Nebulas are not allowed. Constellations are also not celestial bodies but is something we have permitted because the old shop introduced it and we didn’t want to take it away from players, in case there were any questions about that!

(Petit-Prince is a valid name, though!)

Additionally, regarding lacerations, Senshi magic cannot be written to cause lasting damage (As the magic is intended to exist for a duration and then it, and the effects should disappear), but in this instance, the magic is the burst of wind. The wind disappears, and the players have the choice to take damage or otherwise. In the basic magic, the wind pushes the character back and possibly knocks them over. It does not need a duration, but I would recommend bumping it up to three uses!

For his super magic, the clarification that lacerations are not guaranteed is important. We have worked hard to adjust Senshi magic so that damage is optional, and sometimes players will not question the semantics of ‘can’ and ‘will’, so it helps to have clarification right there in the magic! I would suggest adjusting the magic to instead say, “It is strong enough to knock you over and back a few feet, and will knock the wind out of a target and leave them feeling dizzy while they recover from the blow. At player discretion, the magic may also cause bruising or three long, somewhat deep lacerations, as if they had been attacked by a bird’s talon.” This gives the player all the information they need, but also makes the magic more powerful than his basic stage (by making the target winded and dizzy). If the player chooses to take lasting damage, they can, but it is clearly up to their discretion.

For his Eternal magic, the clarification you provided is enough for this magic to be approvable, however, I am worried that you may wind up in battle with an underpowered magic. You are not obligated to change this, because it is stampable! It is just a concern that I can see popping up down the road, but if you are all right with the magic as it is written, the eternal magic is stampable! (When you reach eternal stage, if you find yourself unhappy with his abilities you can always revise, but there is no pressure because there is nothing wrong with this magic; thank you for outlining its intent and capabilities!)

One other thing that I want to note is that, at 23 years old, he would be too old to awaken as a Senshi! The latest a civilian can awaken as a Senshi is the night before their 21st birthday, so I am afraid you will have to age him down to awaken him!

Please give me a quote if you have any questions or make any changes and I’ll be back as soon as possible!
PostPosted: Sat Jan 27, 2018 12:52 pm


Kyuseisha no Hikari


Can I have it that he awoke at 21, but never powered up b/c ******** fighting hes not about that.

(I just really dont want to play another 21yr old)


iStoleYurVamps

iStoleYurVamps


Trash Husband



Kyuseisha no Hikari

Crew

Dragonslaying Dragon

PostPosted: Mon Jan 29, 2018 8:16 am


iStoleYurVamps
Kyuseisha no Hikari


Can I have it that he awoke at 21, but never powered up b/c ******** fighting hes not about that.

(I just really dont want to play another 21yr old)


I'm sorry ):

Unfortunately, our backdating rules are pretty strict that the longest someone can have been handwaved as being awakened is two weeks, and the latest they can awaken as a senshi is the night before their 21st birthday.
PostPosted: Mon Jan 29, 2018 9:46 pm


Kyuseisha no Hikari
iStoleYurVamps
Kyuseisha no Hikari


Can I have it that he awoke at 21, but never powered up b/c ******** fighting hes not about that.

(I just really dont want to play another 21yr old)


I'm sorry ):

Unfortunately, our backdating rules are pretty strict that the longest someone can have been handwaved as being awakened is two weeks, and the latest they can awaken as a senshi is the night before their 21st birthday.

RIP
he dem boy


iStoleYurVamps

iStoleYurVamps


Trash Husband



Kyuseisha no Hikari

Crew

Dragonslaying Dragon

PostPosted: Tue Jan 30, 2018 5:59 pm


iStoleYurVamps


Thanks so much for the changes! Have fun!

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