Royal sat curled up on the family couch, idly watching daytime TV as their mother headed out of the house. Their ears twitched, focused on the decisive 'Click' of the front door. They waited a few moments longer before rolling off the couch and onto their feet.

Stealthily.

It was nerve-wracking, the heavy thump of their heart that they could feel in the back of their skull as they crept down the hall of their empty home. Any minute now their mother could be rushing back because she forgot something, and Royal would be caught red hoofed. They licked their lips nervously, creeping into their parent's bedroom. The door creaked loudly and Royal froze, feeling as if the world would come crashing down any moment now.

It wasn't as if they was doing anything bad, nothing their mother wouldn't have let them do, but this needed to happen alone.

The door was just as loud as they nudged it shut.

They worked quickly, silently, pulling their favorite articles from their mother's closet and laying them carefully across their parent's bed. Royal assured themself that they weren’t doing anything wrong, but working in secret made that a hard lie to swallow.

Each dress was tried on, the fabric carefully smoothed over their fur, admired in the mirror. They spun and watched the skirts flair, swished about to admire the shape of each dress they tried, each one of them too long but still so beautiful.

It wasn’t as if they wanted to be a girl. Femininity was admired, toyed with, but ultimately Royal had no attachment to womanhood. Or, for that matter, to manhood. More and more Royal seemed to like the idea of being neither. Not a mare or a stallion. Just Royal.

Just Royal, whatever that happened to be.

Right now that was apparently a coward. There was one dress they hadn’t touched, mother’s wedding gown. Beautiful and silky, simple but elegant. Royal still remembers well being younger and staring up at their parent’s wedding photos in admiration. Both were so very beautiful, so of course logic would dictate that Royal, too, was beautiful. It was an unnecessary nudge to a young ego, though there was no way that they would not have made that connection on their own.

The fabric slid over their hoof as if it were made of water. Not the heaviness of cotton or the fake sensation that permeated polyester. Truly a work of art, and Royal wondered if one day, they too would walk down an aisle, glowing and radiant, the center of attention.

With who didn’t matter, and perhaps that was shallow, but Royal wanted a day where they would shine the brightest, above all else.

But to shine that bright, one had to work for it.

Accessories were borrowed, makeup was tried, every step examined in the mirror. Some were mistakes, a shade that didn't go with their fur, or a necklace that didn't match the dress. All a process. One they'd been taking part in for months now.

Royal wasn't doing anything wrong, but didn't want to be seen. They were too prideful of a foal to let anyone see them stumbling, couldn't live with the prospect that anyone would know that this all didn't come naturally to them. They spent hours every day studying magazines and trying out new looks that no one else would ever see. Hours poured into practice all for the illusion that they were perfect. Because the end result was all worth it. There was nothing better than having eyes turn their way, the complements, the envy, it made fixing their hair for the third time worth it. They longed to be admired.

And all thought came to a harsh stop when the final touches were made, and Royal simply stared at themselves in the mirror. Beautiful. Beautiful in the way Royal had admired since they were little. Glowing just like their mother in the family photos truly resplendent in a way they had only dreamed.

They bit their lip, fighting back the tears. This was it, that feeling deep down to the soul that told them this was right. This was what they had always wanted to be. All the weight and anxiety of finding a purpose was gone, they could feel it all the way down to their hooves. This was it.

Somewhere else the door opened. Royal didn’t scramble to hide the evidence or their shame, simply waited. They wanted everyone to see.