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 Posted: Tue Sep 26, 2017 9:19 pm
It had been a simple night, one like so many others. Work was over, he had said his goodbyes to his coworkers, and he had headed home. That night, Shiloh had not worked at the courthouse, but at the towering mall downtown. If he had worked at the courthouse, if he had taken Alexei's offer to drive him home as always, then maybe... Maybe he wouldn't have been in this mess.
The walk home was quiet, peaceful, and he had powered up to be Susquehanna, partially to relieve his own uneasiness in being out in the dark alone, but also because he wished to try to help people. After that fight where Alexei had vanished for a time, he hated the idea of being caught off guard like that again, so every night, he tried to atleast patrol when he was alone to fight and learn more than he had before. And that night had been no different, except for the mirror on the side of a shop. It seemed to tremble slightly, shake and reverberate in a way that Susquehanna could not ignore, and after just a few moments of staring into it, he was drawn in, slammed hard against the ground, air knocked out of his longs, and passed out.
He was unsure of just how much time had passed by the time he opened his eyes again and when he did he found his own bright blue eyes staring back at him. He was in a room, but it was just mirrors in every direction. No doors, no sky, no windows or seams, just Mirrors and his own shaky form reflected in them.
The first night he tried to remain calm, checking his phone, his ring, anything to see if he could communicate with anything, but there was nothing. He continued shouting and banging on the mirrors to see if he could break free, but to no avail. No matter how hard he tried to ram into it, nothing budged, and it left him with nothing but a sore shoulder. When he could no longer move for fear of injuring himself more, he screamed.
He screamed and screamed until his screams fell into sobs and he pleaded with whatever could her him to let him go.
And yet there was no response.
The second night passed by much the same, a mixture of banging and fighting against the mirrors that surrounded him, but it didn't last long. He was alone, truly alone in this mirror. And for that, he cried.
The third night had him staring at his reflection in the mirror, vague thoughts of the lack of hunger coming and going as he let thoughts come and go from his mind. It always came back to a single thought... Did anyone care that he was gone? His father wouldn't have cared, and no one at school would have noticed that the quiet kid in the back hadn't appeared... He had already paid his bills, so no one would notice that... Work... Ah, there was that... He might not have a job if he ever got back home, but just as any other thought that passed is mind, it left and that worry wasn't lingered on... It wasn't until his thoughts drifted to Alexei that he began to cry again. The man was the only person he had in his life that he knew cared... But even he couldn't hope to find him, could he?
The judge wasn't some random person, he couldn't give up his day to search for Shiloh, and the boy knew that. He began to think about what Alexei would have done once he realized that Shiloh was missing. A soft chuckled echoed through the room as Susquehanna thought of that man, the one who found his place in his dreams even here, coming in with sword in hand to rescue him... It was a fantasy, of course, but one he loved, and one that allowed him to sleep peacefully on that third night. That would be the last night he spent in silence and in relative ease.
The fourth night had him sobbing, curled up in a ball for hour upon hour upon hour as he began to realize he wasn't going to escape. No one would find him, no one cared about him enough to. Nothing in the world was worth spending time trying to help he pitiful man, and he knew his far too well. From his father, to his boss, to even past memories of a man who hurt him more than anyone could imagine, they all agreed, he was nothing, beyond worthless and deserved nothing but this fate. Even though his sobs, Susquehanna knew this was true and denied it no longer.
The fifth night was filled with haunting thoughts of death. The hunger would not take him; his stomach had not made a sound since he entered the room, so he tried to think of other ways to die... Loneliness ate away at him so much gnawing and tearing at his mind to the point where he just wanted it to stop. He wanted everything to stop. And he tried... He tried time after time to try to end his suffering, only to have it end with him waking up and choking for hair as he retched over and over again. Pain overtook everything else, scars on his neck, faded from time began to burn a fiery red, and new bruises began to form from where his belt had dug in hard. Every inch of his body felt that pain, and yet, he was still alive. Only for the briefest of moments he lost consciousness, but came back, with even less hope than he had before.
The six night had nothing more from him. No thoughts, no sobs, no words uttered in the empty mirror box. The only sound left was that of faint breathing, raspy and pained from self inflicted injury, and the slight thump... thump.... thump... of a bare finger hitting the mirror. Susquehanna had no fight left in him... He had no hope, no strength... Perhaps he wasn't even there anymore, eyes dulled and unfocused as he lied infront of one of the mirror walls. Every so often, a tear would drip from is eyes, adding to the chorus of breaths and thumps for the briefest of moments as it landed in a puddle below his head.
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Posted: Tue Sep 26, 2017 9:37 pm
Nothing in the room moved, sans the thin wall of smoke that clung to the ceiling and dripped down the wall—until, suddenly, Mamertine collapsed to the floor.
He sat up quickly and looked around the room with narrowed eyes. There was confusion on his face, even if he was too prideful and restrained to admit it. All confusion, all fear, slipped away when his eyes landed on Susquehanna.
On Shiloh.
His heart lurched when he saw him, and he had to wonder if this was a dream. Only, he moved quickly to his feet and made his way to him, kneeling next to him. He placed a hand on his shoulder and tried to turn him to face him; he nearly faltered and said his name but realized that if he did as much, he’d have revealed himself.
Mamertine was too secretive to let loose such an important secret, even to Shiloh.
“Hey,” he said instead, and though he tried to keep his voice firm and steady he could not keep out the worry that leaked into it.
“You’re a sight for sore eyes. Are you all right?”
No, he wasn’t. Mamertine could see that. But he needed to make sure he was real. He could see him, touch him.
He needed to hear him.
And then, he needed to figure out where they were and how they got here.
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Posted: Tue Sep 26, 2017 9:54 pm
Susquehanna had heard the sound of something hitting the ground but did not move. His mind had already tricked him too many times before, playing that soft sweet voice of the man he loved over and over again.
He could not, however, ignore the hand that touched his shoulder and turned him. His wateryeyes saw someone familiar, but... He still couldn't believe it. Maybe he was dreaming again... Maybe he could try hard enough and wish this man to be the one he longed for the most... No, that would be selfish. He wouldn't wish that fate one Alexei even in his dreams.
So he remained silent, fingers curling up into the man's sleeve. It was a dream... He couldn't be real... But... If he were real, then maybe.... Just maybe this trick, this figure his mind slowly began to recognize, could ease his mind before he passed.
"Alexei... That man I was with before... Do you know if he's safe...?" His voice was raspy and every word was like a dagger to his bruised and cut throat, but he needed to know... That's all he needed to know, then he would die here content. Even if the man was just part of the hallucinations brought on by his solitude, he hoped that his mind would be kind enough to lie to him.
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Posted: Fri Sep 29, 2017 5:00 pm
Mamertine looked at him for a moment, trying to decide how best to answer his question. He couldn’t reveal too much information without outing his identity, and despite how much he might trust Shiloh, his own personal hang-ups dictated that he keep it to himself. At least, for now.
He played someone stupid.
“If you’re asking about the man you lost the last time we ran into each other, the judge? There’s not been anything in the papers about him missing. He’s probably fine. Probably worried about you, though. What happened?” he asked, careful to keep his voice soft.
Shiloh—or, Susquehanna—didn’t seem to have a very stable grip on things right now and he didn’t want to push him over the edge. He wanted to reassure him that everything was all right and make sure he knew that they were getting out of here—even if Mamertine didn’t really have any idea about how they were supposed to go about that.
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Posted: Sat Sep 30, 2017 4:33 pm
"Good... Good..." That's right, Alexei was well known. He was important, needed in this world, and everyone would hear if he had gone missing... It wouldn't be so strange to think that maybe Alexei was so busy that he didn't have time to look for him. That was alright, he understood with Alexei's position; the life of one janitor wasn't enough to stray from deciding the fate of so many. There wasn't time. There was never any time.
Still, he couldn't tell if Mamertine was real or not. His isolation led to so many illusions that he couldn't tell if any of this was real. Maybe he was asleep... Maybe this specter before him was meant to be his grim reaper, and if that was the case, he would meet him without fear.
"You've come to help me then... Thank you." With a shaky grasp, Susquehanna pulled Mamertine's hands off of him, lowering himself away from him to lie back on the ground. Once flat, he gently took those hands and placed them about his throat, wincing as the fabric of the other knight's gloves brushed against the barely heeled cuts about his neck. And then, he held them down in place, using his own strength to start applying pressure.
"It won't take much... As hard as you can. Fourteen seconds to pass out... Three minutes to die..." He said, eyes unfocused and looking up past Mamertine's golden eyes, to he blank ceiling above them. He spoke the phase again, Fourteen to pass out, three to die softly, slowly, as if he had been whispered it countless times before. He had, but he never did tell anyone, and he never would. It seemed like his secrets and suffering would go with him to the grave. But that was alright. He knew kindness for a small while and he was happy with that.
Now, he just wanted to rest.
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Posted: Mon Oct 02, 2017 4:34 pm
Mamertine’s expression changed immediately when the page made such a request—when, more than that, the page took Mamertine’s hands and wrapped them around his own neck. As soon as Susquehanna released his grip on Mamertine, Mamertine recoiled. “I’m not here to kill you,” he said firmly. A part of him wanted to say that he’d been looking for him, but he couldn’t do that as honestly as he wanted to without revealing his identity.
He just wasn’t ready to do something like that just yet.
He managed to reveal at least, “I was looking for you, actually. You’ve been gone for a few days. When was the last time you ate something?”
He didn’t have much to offer, only a protein bar or two that he’d stashed away for emergencies.
This counted as an emergency, he figured—even if he couldn’t have anticipated that this is where he would find Shiloh, he wanted to make sure he was all right.
He withdrew the bar from where he’d packed it away in subspace; it wasn’t anything particularly delicious, but it was coffee flavored and had always done a good job of giving him a little extra energy when he needed it. Alexei had a box of them in his house but he doubted Susquehanna would have noticed them, or that he would have recalled given the condition he was in.
“Here.” He opened the wrapper for the page and held it to his lips wishing he’d packed away something more to drink. He had a bottle of water in subspace that soon appeared in his hand; it was half empty already but he doubted Susquehanna was in any condition to protest. “I need you to eat, and drink. I’m going to get you out of here. I’m going to get you home.”
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Posted: Tue Oct 10, 2017 8:50 pm
Something inside Susquehanna seemed to break a little more when Mamertine pulled away, feeling as if he was denied the only way he could ever be happy again. Any sort of hope he had was gone, leaving behind the lonely man he had been before he met Alexei, but perhaps even more broken.
Though... When Mamertine mentioned he was looking for him, he paused, eyes turning to focus on the man and pushed up slightly from the ground.
"Why were you...?" He couldn't remember ever having met Mamertine after that night they fought together to protect Alexei. It was a chance meeting that night to him, something that would never really happen again, and yet this man had been looking for him... It made no sense. With a questioning look, he sat up fully leaning heavily against the man who came to find him, or so he said. And he didn't protest the food. It wasn't as if he was hungry, but he truly wasn't in any position to protest, not that he ever would anyway.
As he swallowed, he winced, the pain from his bruising sending a fire through him in the worse of ways, but he did it, not wanting to disappoint. Strangely enough, he wasn't hungry nor thirsty, just tired.
"There's no way out..." Susquehanna finally murmured again, eyes pressing tiredly against Mamertine's shoulder. "There's no way out... There's no hunger, no thirst here... Just silence and no one... That's why I want you to help me end this... I'm not strong enough to do it on my own... You can do it just fine... Fourteen seconds, three minutes..."
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Posted: Thu Oct 12, 2017 12:01 pm
“We aren’t going to be doing that,” Mamertine said firmly. “I’m not going to kill you, and I’m not going to let you die. I’m going to get us out of here. So you need to stop thinking like this.”
He knew how long Shiloh had been gone for, but none of this sat very well with him; he didn’t like seeing the younger man in such a state.
In a way, he understood the despair of solitude and loneliness.
But to want death? To crave it?
It was something he could never understand. Mamertine valued his life—this life and Alexei’s.
Especially Alexei’s.
He hadn’t worked so hard to get to where he was just so he could throw it away. Just so his emotions could weigh him down and destroy him. Truthfully, Alexei could only sympathize so much but he understood that there was no helping someone who didn’t want help. He’d seen it so many times in the Court room and he’d have been lying if he’d said he was more favorable to someone who genuinely seemed to want to repent, to improve. To get better.
He wasn’t ready to give up on Shiloh yet.
“You’re not alone anymore. I’m here with you, all right? We’re going to get out of here. You’re going to go home. Back to your life, back to the people who care about you.”
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Posted: Sat Oct 21, 2017 10:37 am
“But…” Words were failing him now, as he really didn’t have any arguments against Mamertine… Just because he felt there was no hope left, didn’t mean there really wasn’t… No matter how much he wanted to just fade away and sleep forever, he couldn’t push that same will onto Mamertine, and the very thought that he had tried to cut through the fog in his mind and left him feeling nauseous. “I-I’m sorry…”
More often than not doubts crowded Shiloh’s mind, specifically about who would care had he vanished. This time, however, he seemed to know that someone would care. And that feeling of uneasiness of letting Alexei down after they had tried so hard to make their friendship with one another work was enough to have him nod slightly at his last few words. He wanted to see Alexei again more than anything. Even if it wasn’t for long and death still came for him, he wanted to atleast be able to tell Alexei how much he meant to him..
“Alright… I’ll go with you…”
No sooner had he said this, the floor below him began to crack. Large chunks began to fall out from underneath their feet, and before they could scramble away, the floor was gone, and they fell.
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