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 Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 3:46 pm
The movie Tobias had convinced Evan to go see was much more enjoyable that Evan had anticipated; he hadn’t really gone into it knowing what it was about, but Tobias had assured him he didn’t have anything to be afraid of. He was right, of course. There wasn’t too much action, not too much noise. He’d been able to relax, even in the darkness.
Only, it was dark when they’d gotten out and that bothered him more than he wanted to admit. It hadn’t been worth it to bring the car considering there was no option to park nearby; they’d been doing construction on the area for weeks now. Of course, that hadn’t bothered Evan, but he hadn’t considered how long the movie was going to take to get out until they were outside of the theater, looking up at a dark sky.
He chewed on his lip for a moment, trying to figure out how best to voice his concerns without sounding like a coward and without having to explain too much, but he figured Tobias already knew he was weird. Reluctantly, he cleared his throat and said, “It’s sort of late. We should call Cambria to pick us up.”
She had told him to call if he needed anything…
So he almost didn’t even feel guilty about it.
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 3:51 pm
Tobias reached down and took Evan’s hand in his own, lacing fingers with him and giving a gentle squeeze. “Don’t you worry. We don’t need to bother Cambria with anything, I won’t let anything happen to you, Evan. I promise.”
Tonight had been great. Going to the movies had been a fantastic idea, especially when he had convinced Evan to push up the armrest between the two of them and rested against Tobias. It was such a fun game to see just how far he could push before Evan recoiled...and the boundaries were getting less and less. That wasn’t to say he didn’t like Evan, for honestly, he was growing quite fond of the other male, and very much enjoyed the time they spent together.
Besides. Now that he had the power that he had, there was nothing in the dark that frightened him, not anymore at least.
“Do you really think I would let anything or anyone hurt you? Haven’t you learned to trust me a bit more than that, Ev? My little cutie pie.”
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 3:55 pm
Evan allowed Tobias to take his hand but didn’t seem wholly convinced when he suggested that they didn’t need to reach out to Cambria. He shrugged, but chewed on his lip until Tobias spoke again. “Sometimes it’s not about what you let someone do, it’s what you can’t stop. I mean, maybe you could chase away a squirrel or something, but somebody with a knife? A gun?”
Evan shrugged. “A monster?”
He let the question hang in the air for a few seconds, and it was clear the thought was still heavy on his mind, but he didn’t pull away from Tobias or try to firmly stand his ground. He eyed the shadows with obvious reluctance and squeezed Tobias hand tightly before moving closer.
“I trust you,” he declared quietly. “Just. Other people, not so much. I just hate any time around sunset, or after. I don’t like how the shadows move.”
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 3:55 pm
Tobias drew Evan’s hand to his lips and kissed the back of it. “I’ll protect you from anything. From shadows, from men with guns or knives. From squirrels with guns or knives, and from monsters with sharp teeth. Heck, I’ll protect you from monsters with pet gun squirrels too, if you’re worried about that.” Because this was Evan. Of course he’d be worried about that. He was worried about everything. But...Tobias wasn’t afraid anymore. Not since becoming Andalusite.
Nothing would ever scare him again, he was quite sure of that.
“I had a really good time with you, I hope you enjoyed the movie as much as I did.” He tugged Evan’s hand gently, beginning to walk, not giving him the chance to object again. They would make it home and Evan would be able to trust him even more...and perhaps…
Well. Just perhaps.
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:01 pm
Though Evan returned Tobias’ words with a smile, it was hard to tell if it was a real one. Evan was good at hiding behind fake emotions, albeit his resolve was short lived. His brows remained knit and he was perpetually on edge. He wanted to protest, but he couldn’t. When Tobias tugged his hand, he went along with it, because if he didn’t he’d just wind up doing something stupid.
Like sitting outside the movie theater, waiting for Cambria to come pick him up, and being afraid of everyone and everything again.
He tried to remind himself that he was a Senshi—that he could power up and fight things back if he needed to. He was supposed to protect his identity, but he knew he could protect himself, probably.
Probably.
He released a soft breath he’d been holding for too long and willed himself to relax. It didn’t work, and he only wound up squeezing Tobias’ hands tighter as he was lead away from the lights of the theater.
“I had a good time too,” he replied. He didn’t want to ruin tonight, but every sound, every shadow, made him jump. They were less than half a block from the movie theater when he froze. It wasn’t that he wanted to stop; he was trying to move forward. But his body shut down. His leg locked and everything followed from there, rigid and weak.
Like a deer in headlights, frozen by some sound not too far ahead of them. It was nothing.
He knew it was nothing, but his own irrational paranoia.
“Sorry,” he breathed, but he didn’t move. “I’m an adult. I’m not scared of the dark,” he said, but it was more to himself than Tobias. Like he could actually convince himself there wasn’t anything to be afraid of. He looked terrified, though, and it was hell to try and force his leg to move even an inch in front of him. He was ashamed.
This wasn’t what he wanted to show Tobias. This wasn’t how a stable, rational adult acted.
And Tobias had said he’d keep him safe, but Evan had saved him from a youma not too long ago. Or, at least, Malus had, but…semantics.
“I’m sorry,” he said again. “I just need a second.” He forced a laugh, but it was bitter and humiliated. “You know, you’d think it would be easy to go quickly. Like, I want to get home, fast. But my body doesn’t always listen to my head. Which is just. It’s stupid, because.”
His voice faltered and he shook his head. “I’m sorry. I don’t mean to be like this. I don’t want to be like this. I had a really good time tonight, I just. Need a second before we get too far.”
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:31 pm
Tobias was honestly worried for a moment, watching Evan and leaning down to place a kiss on the top of his hair. “It’s fine. I get it. I don’t like the dark either.” It was half true. He hadn’t liked the dark...he didn’t care much either way now, but hey. It took a few moments of thinking before Tobias finally just chuckled softly, dropping Evan’s hand and scooping him up into his arms as though he was his bride.
“You’re fine, Evan. You’re safe and now I’ll get us both home, you just hold onto me, okay? I’ve got you. Seriously. I won’t let you fall, or let you get eaten, and you don’t hardly weigh anything, so that makes this really easy.”
He began walking once more, keeping a tight hold on Evan, taking the time to place more kisses on the top of his head as they walked.
“Tell me more about the food truck. What new ideas have you and Cambria come up with? Also, are there any new recipes for me to try soon? I do love your cooking. And your face, but I’m sure you knew that already.”
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:37 pm
Evan was quiet for a moment, tense when he was first scooped up. It took only a few seconds for him to relax in Tobias’ arms. A part of him knew that they were both more vulnerable like this, and yet, for whatever reason, he felt safer. He didn’t have to look at the shadows, or worry about what was coming. It was no different than hiding under the covers in bed. Only, like this he was warmer, and he could hear Tobias’ heartbeat well enough that it was lulling him into a sense of complacency, too.
And something about kisses was just naturally comforting.
“I have a ton of new recipes,” he muttered into Tobias’ chest. His voice was muffled so he turned away so he could face him. “We’re still working on a name, but we have some recipes that I know I want to do. The menu’s slowly coming together. I think I’m going to have a ‘special of the day’ though, so I can keep trying new things. So that every day there’ll be something special to try. So no one will ever get bored.”
Not that anyone could get bored eating his food; he’d make sure of that.
“So if you just make time, I’ll make time and you can come over.”
His eyes drifted from Tobias’ face to the purple accessory he was wearing—the sash he had given him for his injury, when he was Malus. For a few seconds, he just stared at it—and then he couldn’t help but ask, “Tobias? Why do you wear that?”
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:39 pm
“Perfect. I have a ton of new tastebuds, and I’m working on growing a couple of new stomachs too. Not to mention the extra room I’ve been making in my pants. Meaning I’ve gone up at least a size with them.” Tobias grinned as he walked, very much enjoying the way Evan had all but melted against him. This was how it should be. How he was going to make sure it was going to be from now on. Evan would always be this easy to deal with, he was sure.
When the other male asked about the scarf, Tobias paused. “Didn’t I tell you? That time I ended up getting...well. Gnawed on by the radioactive boar that one time, I’m sure I told you about that at the very least...but I was saved by this guy in purple and he used this to wrap up my leg and I don’t know. I like it. I washed it up really good and I like how it looks in my hair. I guess...you could say that it’s my security blanket? My good luck charm.”
He didn’t mind sharing the information, Evan wasn’t someone he felt that he always had to hide from...especially not at times like this. The more vulnerable Evan thought that he was, the more Evan would keep letting his own guard down.
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:41 pm
For a short while, Evan was quiet again. His eyes remained on the purple sash and he found himself slowly nodding again. “That’s kind of cute. I didn’t think a big, tough guy like you was superstitious.”
Evan wasn’t superstitious, per se; he didn’t know if he believed in luck, but he could understand carrying something important. He did it for comfort, though, more than anything. Not because it would keep him safe, but because it made him feel better to carry something from someone he cared about. On his keys, he had something of both Cambria’s and Zac’s, just to remind him that they were always there for him.
Always with him.
He was comfortable in Tobias’ arms, but adjusted himself anyway.
“You should get me a keychain. Or something small, that I can put on my keychain,” he mused. Realizing, perhaps, that it might have come across as a little rude—especially without an explanation—he cleared his throat. “I mean, and in exchange I’ll cook you an extra big, extra delicious meal.”
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:41 pm
“I mean, everyone has their comforts, Ev. You know that as well as anyone, and...I’d be happy to get you something for your keychain. I’ll have to think of what to get, but I’ll bring it when I come to dinner tomorrow.” He was quiet for a minute, then grinned as an idea struck him.
“You don’t need to cook an extra delicious meal, all of your food is equally amazing, so I’m not quite sure how you can make something that’s extra delicious, and if you can, I’m not sure I’m ready to have that level of wonder at this point in my life. What if that’s it. What if that’s the high point in my life, and nothing ever comes close to that one extra special meal you made me and I end up dying because I’m so miserable because everything else tastes like dirt? Do you really want me to die, Evan?”
Tobias was being a drama queen, he knew it but...he really didn’t care all that much. “How about you just...let me sleep over instead, is that fair? I want to hold you all night long, my precious.”
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:42 pm
Tobias was right, Evan figured. All his food was equally good, but that was easy to say when Evan poured all of his heart, all of his efforts into every single meal. But, cooking was just about the only thing he was able to offer to someone in return for anything, so naturally it was his go-to.
Tobias had just wizened up and realized that there was no ‘special’ meal from Evan—they were all special.
Even if Tobias was a drama queen about some of it; Evan wouldn’t have complained if Tobias had gotten so addicted to his food it was the only thing he could eat. At least the food truck never would have gone out of business.
But…
He was quiet for a moment as he considered the proposed alternative. In Tobias’ arms, he twiddled his thumbs contemplatively, trying to weigh the pros and cons against each other. On one hand, he was sure Tobias was harmless, and it would have been safer to let him stay the night. Especially since he was carrying him home like this; truly, Evan didn’t want him out. It was late, and who knew what could have been lurking, anywhere. He shuddered at the thought and found himself nodding before he’d even managed to make it to the cons.
“You can sleep over,” he said slowly, still debating how he wanted to word his answer. “But I don’t know about you holding me all night. I kick in my sleep, and I wake up a lot. We can probably make a nest on the ground, I’m not sure I there’s enough room on the bed. But definitely the ground. But,” he shrugged, “We’ll have to sleep with a night light on. I mean, for your sake. So you don’t wake up lost and confused. Or trip over me on the ground.”
And not at all because Evan still couldn’t stand a dark room.
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:42 pm
Evan had been quiet for so long that Tobias was almost beginning to wonder if he had fallen asleep. Not that he would have blamed him, being carried just did that to a person, that was why little kids fell asleep so often. He gave a quiet sigh and was about to place another kiss on Evan’s head when he spoke...inviting him to sleep over tonight.
Well. That wasn’t what he had expected, but there was no way he would turn such a nice offer down, no way at all. “Well then. And here I was just hoping for when I picked you out a nice keychain, but I’ll take it. I would love to curl up and nest with you, Evan. It sounds like a good night, if I do say so myself.” He grinned widely, glad that Evan couldn’t see his face from the position he was in.
If he was sleeping over tonight, well. Then it wouldn’t be too much longer before he got what he really wanted. “A night light sounds just fine to me...hey, Ev. Is Zac going to look at me with his stink eye again, do you think? Because, he seriously sometimes makes me feel like he thinks I’m going to murder you in your sleep or something. Which, obviously I’m not.” It was almost cute, how protective Zac was...but it was throwing off his groove just a bit.
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:43 pm
Evan shrugged as best he could in Tobias’ arms. “No, Zac’s the one you have to worry about murdering you in your sleep,” he answered, though it was unclear if he was teasing or really seemed to mean it. Either way, he didn’t seem particularly alarmed. “He’s been my friend for a long time.”
Things hadn’t always been perfect; the majority of their relationship had weighed heavily on Evan, but he was so desperate to have someone like him, anyone, that even when Zack was trying to chase him away, he’d stayed. When Zack had been cruel, he’d relented. It was easy to convince himself that he was in the wrong, that he’d deserved it.
But things were different now.
He and Zack were getting along better now than ever, and if turning into a youma had done anything for him, it had shown him how much Zack really did care. Zack had changed, for the better. He was a little overbearing, but he was sweet, in his own way. He was considerate and charming and sometimes a little crass but Evan wouldn’t have changed anything about him, now.
“We dated in high school, but we broke up a while ago. My parents and I didn’t really get along around that point in time, so when I got kicked out, he let me stay with him, and I sort of just haven’t left. And then I sort of had a really bad year last year, so he’s been taking extra care to look out for me. Which is why he gives you the stink eye. But,” he shrugged, “He looks at everyone like that, I think. I’m pretty good at getting myself into shitty situations and getting myself hurt. He just doesn’t want me to get caught up with the wrong people. I have a type,” Evan explained. “Or, at least, I did, when I was dating.”
He released a long sigh and expanded, “I never go after anyone good for me.”
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:44 pm
“Yikes. So he might come in and kill me tonight? That sucks just a bit.” Tobias grew quiet, listening to the rest of Evan’s chatter. So. Zac was his ex, hm? That was interesting. He figured there had to be something sexual about his roommates, the way he had spoke of them the first time, but…
It was annoying that he felt jealousy start to rise at the thought of Evan dating the blonde who clearly didn’t like him…but…well. Evan was snuggled up in his arms right now, and that was where he was going to stay. All night long. “It’s really good that you have him though, if he cares so much for you…it’s great to have a friend like that. I’ll admit, I might be a little jealous of the fact that he got to date you, but I still think that he has to be at least half decent to keep you so well protected.”
Tobias fell silent for a few more steps, letting the last line roam around his mind for a few minutes before figuring out what to say. “What do you think about me? Would you ever go after me do you think? Again, not now. I know you don’t want to date now. But. Maybe someday? Am I your type, and if so…does that make me bad for you, Ev? I hope not.”
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Posted: Tue Aug 15, 2017 4:45 pm
Evan didn’t wait too much time thinking about it. “I don’t know.”
He seemed like he might leave it at that, but figured that if Tobias was asking, maybe it was important to him, and the last thing he wanted to do was upset him—even if he figured Tobias wasn’t the sort to drop him on the ground or anything, just in case, Evan drew in a breath and added, “It seems sort of dangerous to think about. Because if you are my type, that means I’m going to wind up hurt if I give you a chance. But if you’re not my type, I don’t know. I don’t have a type right now, so maybe all of that is null. Honestly, I don’t know.”
It wasn’t an avoidant response, it was the truth; Evan’s brows were knit with obvious contemplation and his lips had pursed tightly. “I guess right now I just don’t understand the appeal of dating, you know? Like, you share everything, all your weaknesses, all your flaws, and I think I have so many that there’s no reason for anyone to stay. Like—you, for example. You’re nice, and considerate, and strong and brave, and you have great taste in food. You take care of yourself, and I might not always understand your fashion choice,” he glanced at the purple sash, “But you look good. You seem like you know what you want, and you work hard to get it. I don’t look at you and see any flaws, though. So either you’re really good at hiding them, or you don’t have any, and I guess both of those are enough to make me worry. Because, either you’re hiding them, and there’s a whole part of you I don’t know, or you’re too perfect and I can’t ever live up to that standard or be good enough.”
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