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 Posted: Fri Jul 07, 2017 11:59 am
Another night, another patrol. Lt Chrysotile's existence had fallen into something of a numb, mindless routine since being put under Captain Quartz's "command." He had too much time to think now, since he was collecting a third of the captain's starseed quota along with his own, plus doing other obscure skutwork under the auspices of IntelOps. At least he had managed to not screw up so that nothing went up the very short food chain to General Schorl. NOBODY wanted that to happen: not Quartz, whom would also be held accountable, and certainly not Chrysotile. So he kept to the shadows, moving through the world so he wouldn't be noticed, totally different than how he moved through the world as Emory Counsel. Though his Negaverse issues and behaviors were starting to bleed into his civilian life; he wasn't as brash or outgoing as he used to be, for one, and a few of his friends at DCU had commented on the change in his personality. So had his mother, who was growing concerned about him. Basketball still provided an escape, and he had thrown himself even more into the game, both at school and in his down time. But he couldn't play basketball as Chrysotile, and he was spending more and more time powered up. There were days, in fact, where he woke up, left the house and powered up, stayed that way until well into the night, then came home and powered down and collapsed in his bed. It was a miracle he hadn't crawled into a bottle like Quartz had. He had every reason to. Because things were going on that were weighing heavily on his mind, more than just Quartz's alcoholism and the threat of Schorl hanging over his head. He didn't have many friends in the Negaverse -- oh who was he kidding, he didn't have ANY friends in the Negaverse -- but he listened, as befit someone in Intel, and some of the things he had heard had him puzzled and concerned. He'd overheard talk, for example, about more than one instance of Negaverse agents eating the starseeds they'd taken instead of turning them in. The mere idea revulsed him; eating someone else's soul? How could they continue to be viewed as the true protectors of the people of Earth if they did something like that? There were other things, too, things he didn't want to think about… but suddenly an Order signature tickled at the back of his mind as he made his way down an alley near the Theater district. s**t. The last thing he wanted was a fight -- he snorted softly at that realization; a year ago he would have been all gung-ho about giving the White Moon a beatdown. Funny how so much could change in a year. Summoning his afghan, Chrysotile hurried to a nearby faucet and soaked the "weapon" down thoroughly in water. The lieutenant had discovered quite by accident that his seemingly useless afghan became pretty effective to smack people down with when it was sopping wet. He moved to the center of the alley then to await whomever it was that would no doubt be coming for him. He didn't care at this point; maybe being on the receiving end of a good beatdown was what he needed right now.
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Posted: Fri Jul 14, 2017 1:37 pm
Tension was something Midgard found that settled between the spaces of his spine and kept him pulled taut like a bowstring. Most days, his shoulders ached from the weight of his ghosts as they sat upon his shoulders and there were dark bags beneath his eyes; a product from days without sleep as he moved about life almost mechanically.
There were splashes of bright light and color in his world, things that eased the ache in his ribs where his heart was becoming a worn-down husk of an organ, the tight hands of anxiety clasped around it as it beat sluggishly and off rhythm even on his best days.
Receding into himself was becoming a habit, despite the people that tried to coax him out of the cocoon he was desperate to build around himself. The behavior had gotten worse, since he had gone to his wonder with the ghostly image of his ancestor always haunting him. Amelia had been pleasant enough and yet, the whole affair left a sour taste in his mouth.
The nightmares had grown worse too, flashes of the battle at the power plant bright in his mind every time he closed his eyes. He could hear the desperate pleading voice of his former general, begging him to rebel as he stole the life from his sweet, innocent mother who had no part in their war outside of being a victim of her son's recklessness.
He could picture Tourmaline, with her sharp smile that hid her pain torturing his best friend and he could see Labyrinthite standing over him and condemning him from being the good soldier boy he was taught to be.
Everything was a mess and yet -
Here he was, out on a patrol trying to calm the rapid flutter of his wounded heart and to distract himself because anything was better than the devils in his thoughts. Boots tapped against the concrete as he made his way forward cautiously, hyper-aware of the energy signal that flared in his senses.
Come out, come out... he thought to himself when he saw the man up ahead. Stilling, he felt his heart lurch into his throat, airwaves threatening to constrict as bright green eyes took in the agent. He struck him as unfamiliar, which was a blessing in itself.
"It's such a nice night, isn't it?" He made himself ask, forcing his feet closer as his hands twitched at his side, ready to summon his shield as needed.
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Posted: Tue Jul 18, 2017 12:42 pm
"Yeah, it sure is." Chrysotile felt his grip tighten on his afghan and cringed internally for the umpteen millionth time at how ridiculous he must look dragging that thing around. "Really nice night for this time of year." He eyed the knight who was standing in front of him, studied the man's uniform and the symbols scattered over him, a faint curiosity crossing his thoughts. While he had seen any number of knights of all ranks while out on his missions, he couldn't recall seeing one with this symbol on them. He couldn't tell what it was, not in the darkness and not at this distance. Knights fascinated him; they seemed to have something of a structure within themselves, sort of -- not to the extent the Negaverse did, clearly, but they had a ranking system that made sense, and were more often than not a fiercer foe than the senshis were. Probably because they had weapons, and the senshis didn't. He wondered what this knight's weapon was, and where he was hiding it, though he noted the position of his hands and figured the knight could call it at a moment's notice. And it probably wasn't anything as stupid as an afghan either. "You may as well get it over with," Chrysotile shrugged at the knight, a wry resigned smile playing over his lips. "You may as well go ahead and beat me up now, cause I know that's what's coming." The tall lieutenant spread his arms as if in surrender, hoisting the wet afghan off the ground. It never ceased to amaze him that no matter how big and athletic he was as a civilian, it didn't matter when he was powered up. He always got beaten up.
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Posted: Wed Jul 19, 2017 2:35 pm
The way he was being observed made him uncomfortable, but his body was rigid, and he was locked in place.
Do not assume the worst, he told himself, though he found that he was unable to shake the worry that the lieutenant was one of theirs. He half expected the crystal to surface, for someone to be called, or for an ambush to appear. When nothing happened, he blinked and looked at the lieutenant, perplexed.
"Get what over with?" He asked, wetting his lips as he inhaled through his nose in a poor attempt to settle the crawling nerves. "What- " he nearly choked on his question, surprise lighting his features as he knitted his brows, gloved hand coming to slide across his mouth. "Why do you think I'm going to beat you up?" And why would he just stand there and take it.
That was the most confusing thing of it all.
"I'm not here to fight, unless I have to."
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Posted: Fri Jul 21, 2017 6:50 pm
"That's what everybody does. They just want to beat me up." Chrysotile squinted at the knight, who wasn't attacking him. That confused him slightly and gave him cause to regard the man again, this time with curiosity. Usually they didn't engage in banter before the beatdown came. And from this guy's banter he was coming to the conclusion that the knight didn't want to attack him at all. "You see this?" He raised the afghan and held it out. "This would be better served on the back of Grandma's couch for all the good it does." Letting the sodden crocheted blanket drop to the ground with a wet squelching sound, he relaxed a little, shoulders slumping. "That has been all I've gotten out of the Negaverse. Do you even know what that's like? You go in expecting certain things, like, oh I don't know, a little bit of mutual respect, some training and a meaningful mission or two, and all they do is give you a piece of crap as a weapon and a whole lot of abuse. It doesn't matter that I'm only a lieutenant. You don't treat your ground troops like that." With a sigh Chrysotile scrubbed his face. "Look, man, I'm sorry I unloaded on you like that. You just happened to be in the wrong place at the wrong time."
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Posted: Mon Jul 24, 2017 8:02 am
Listening to this man was difficult, waging emotions flaring within him because he knew and he understood and perhaps that was the scariest part of it all. Especially since there was a warning light flashing in the back of his mind going, what if this is a trap?
But there were no other energy signatures in the vicinity and when he looked, the two of them were alone.
Sure, the lieutenant could call for help but...someone had given him a chance, taken a leap of faith with him and perhaps it was time for him to do the same. If it did turn into a trap, he would learn from it, provided he made it out alive.
"I know." His voice wavered slightly, but Midgard held himself strongly anyway, determined to push forward. "You're given the impression that the organization is something it's not. That you can make a difference and maybe help people. Then," he paused to shake his head, laugh a little bitterly with fingers tapping against his thigh, "you watch people change, get meaner, crueler," another pause as he sought the right word. It didn't come so he settled on something simple. "You watch them become dark, twisted versions of the people you once knew and then they turn, plan to break you so that you're the same."
His adam's apple bobbed as he swallowed. "The only reason I got out was because I was at the wrong place at the wrong time."
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Posted: Mon Jul 24, 2017 10:19 am
Chrysotile's blue eyes widened in disbelief as the knight spoke. Quickly he cast about for other energy signatures, more knights coming to back up their comrade, but no, it was just the two of them. So it was not a trap. Just two men on opposite sides of the war bemoaning their lot in life. Now the question came to his mind, was he talking about how the knights did things, or agreeing with him about the Negaverse? As the other man continued, it dawned on Chrysotile that he meant the Negaverse. Only in the ranks of Chaos did one see people grow heartless and cruel and power-mad like he was describing. "Yes," the lieutenant finally said, his thoughts becoming words, "yes, exactly. You know exactly what I'm talking about. But… how?" He studied the knight, eyes pleading to know. "How did you… Were you once… But that's impossible, isn't it? Once you're in, the only way out is death. Right?" He pushed his hand over his spiky purple hair, desperate for answers. Was there really a way out?
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Posted: Mon Jul 24, 2017 11:55 am
Trust was difficult for him, especially when it came to people on the opposing side. With Tourmaline threatening the people he cared about, with Labyrinthite back in the city, and Dia holding a vendetta against him because he refused to talk and he broke her friend's heart...it wasn't safe or smart and yet-
Leap of faith, he reminded himself as green eyes gazed at blue. Take it.
A deep breath and he was taking the metaphorical plunge. "Death's not the only way out, but it's basically the same thing." The smile he offered the man was rueful, as he was thinking about everything he had lost and all which he had gained since he 'left'. "It hurts, a lot. You lose everything. Well, you lose a lot of things. I guess what you lose depends cause, I lost everything that made me the person outside of this," gloved hands gestured to his uniform, indicating his powered side. "Others lost this, some lose both? I don't know...it's...complicated."
And every day he wished he had forgotten everything.
"It takes a whole lotta faith in something you might not be able to touch. But you can get out, it's possible."
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Posted: Mon Jul 24, 2017 2:19 pm
"So you… forget stuff? Like lose your memories?" Chrysotile wouldn't want to lose memories of his family -- they were the reason he'd done this in the first place! His mother and his little sister meant more to him than just about anything. He would hate to lose them… But it sounded like there was more to it than that. It sounded like the knight -- the former Negaverse agent standing in front of him --lost his former identity. Lost his name, lost his memories, lost his former life, except for the things he knew when he was powered up. That must have been awful, a difficult sacrifice to make for freedom from Chaos. Though he said others lose their powered side? The tall lieutenant nearly snorted a chuckle. "If I could forget all this," and he indicated his uniform, "that would be a blessing, I'd think." Forget the smarmily alcoholic Quartz, forget the ever-looming threat of the clearly insane General Schorl, forget all the others whom meant nothing to him, who saw no use in him… Chrysotile swallowed hard. He'd leave those two as enemies for sure. Was that a risk he was willing to take? The answer was obvious. "How do I do it?" he asked finally.
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Posted: Tue Jul 25, 2017 9:14 am
"It's a little more complicated than that." Midgard grimaced, thinking about how he was still readjusting half a year later. "Basically. More or less." His words were accompanied by a shrug and uncomfortable shifting from foot to foot. "Brand new you, give or take a few things." He swallowed, adam's apple bobbing as he watched his companion, a flutter of uncertainty lighting up his belly.
Maybe he shouldn't give away too much too soon. He didn't even know the lieutenant's name.
"You have to understand," he started slowly, rolling his shoulders back as he tried to get himself to relax a little more. "You lose everything in this life and...you risk the people in you care about." He had lost his sister, where she died in his arms because he had been an idiot. "There's no such thing as a choice without repercussions."
For a moment the Chronos squire fell silent, chest constricting and throat closing up. It took several seconds before he could calm himself enough to at least keep speaking. Trauma was a wonderful thing.
"You have to want it." He remembered Labyrinthite speaking of Iris' attempts to purify him and failing. "That's the most important thing. And you need a prince or princess to do it."
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Posted: Tue Jul 25, 2017 1:38 pm
The thought of any harm coming to his family sobered Chrysotile up. He was useless as a protector now, and from the sound of it he ran the risk of putting them in even greater danger if he was somehow able to leave the Negaverse. But weren't they already in danger? Just the danger of day-to-day living in Destiny City, where they could be attacked by a youma or have their starseed removed by one of his fellow agents. That was what he was trying to protect them from. What greater danger would leaving put them in? And then there was the whole thing about losing this life. He figured he'd have to give up his civilian identity, if not his memories, in order to protect both himself and his family, though he was still unclear if he'd lose that part of his life. Repercussions, the knight said. Surely there'd be repercussions in the Negaverse even if someone as low in the hierarchy as he was defected. But did he want out badly enough? He was miserable, sure, but was that enough? Chrysotile sighed heavily. "I want it," he said softly. "I want out. I can't stay in an organization that treats me like fodder. I can't run the risk of screwing up somehow and pissing off either Captain Quartz or General Schorl -- because that's how short my leash is. I'm as good as dead to them anyway."
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Posted: Wed Jul 26, 2017 8:34 am
Midgard wondered what it was like to know that there was a choice and to have it presented to you in a manner that allowed you time to get affairs into order and to be able to think about what it meant instead of having to do it in the heat of the moment, because you were too distraught to think about anything except how you had messed up and that you didn't deserve a second change but you took it anyway.
"Okay," he said quietly.
"I know someone who can provide you with a place to stay." He didn't even think about if Fiona would be upset about him offering her home, he knew that if she was here she would have offered it herself. "For after." He wouldn't risk compromising anyone but himself. "But...we have to find someone to purify you." He had been lucky that Chronos had found him by chance, who knows where he would have ended up if she hadn't.
"Are you sure you're ready to make this choice?"
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Posted: Wed Jul 26, 2017 3:34 pm
"....Yeah. Yes. I mean…" Chrysotile faltered. "I… need some time to, you know, tie up some loose ends. Like with my family. I gotta come up with an excuse for going away, so they won't worry. Don't want to just disappear. And I need to know more, like if I have to do anything, who I have to speak to -- you said a prince or princess needs to do it? Purify me, I mean. I don't even know what a prince or princess is in this context." He laughed softly, embarrassed that he was basically babbling at this point. He smiled gratefully at the knight. "A place to stay… yeah, that would be good while I get my new life together." Taking a few steps closer, he held out his hand. "I really appreciate everything you're doing for me… hell, I don't even know your name. I'm Chrysotile. If you, um, know anyone who can give me more information, or one of these royal people, give them my name. I'll be here about this time every night that I can before… you know."
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Posted: Wed Jul 26, 2017 8:54 pm
Midgard's lips pursed together and he nodded slowly despite the pang of jealousy that spread like a vicious heat through his chest. He didn't have the option of tying loose ends or doing anything but taking the moment for what it was. Then again, he couldn't say with certainty that he still would have taken the leap if he had been given time.
It was for the best, ultimately, that he didn't have time to think about it.
"It's -- " He stopped, because in truth outside of Chronos he had no idea what he was talking about and he felt his cheeks flush at this realization. "I've only met one, she was mine." It wasn't until he said it that he realized how strange it sounded. "I mean - I am a knight of chronos and it was Princess Chronos who graced me with another chance." One he said it, he regretted it, wishing that he wasn't disclosing so much.
"Please, I left a lot behind, I would rather that stayed between us." He had only talked about the details around his leap of faith with Fiona, once, when she had taken him in, and vaguely with Connie. It was still a secret he aimed to keep so closely guarded.
"I'll bring her, next time. She will have more answers than I do. She is...better versed in all of this, I am still green." His 'rank' might have said otherwise but he felt like he was learning to ride a bike for the first time with all of the knight stuff. "Chrysotile," he repeated, slowly, as if he was testing the weight of each syllable in his mouth. "You can call me..." He hesitated again, because he didn't like giving his name out to anyone, it was safer if he couldn't be traced easily for himself but more importantly for the people important to him.
"Call me Manheimr. I'll come back, you have options and if you want it, I will help you."
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Posted: Fri Jul 28, 2017 12:59 pm
Chrysotile nodded. He did have options now. "Manheimr, of Chronos. I'll remember that. You can tell your friends I'm pretty easy to spot," he said with a wry smile, gesturing to himself to indicate his tall basketball player's build, then he pointed to the soggy afghan on the ground. "Not many Negaversers carry something as lame as that, either." Manheimr's reticence bothered him, but not too much. "I completely understand. Thank you for everything you've told me." He understood the man's reluctance to say too much -- hell, for all he knew, Chrysotile might be trying to get info on him to report back to the Negaverse and send his enemies after him. But damn, it would be nice to have some additional information. Hopefully others would come and share what they knew. The tall Negaverse agent hated going in without sufficient knowledge of what was expected of him. Besides, his mind was already working on a story -- a lie -- to tell his family so they wouldn't miss him. "I'll be looking for you the next few nights, okay?" Nuxaz We can wrap soon, I think!
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