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"Ne, Themi-chan, you're not patrolling!" came a whine from within Themisto's folded fuku.

The young man sighed, disliking how much Itsuki nagged him about every little thing. If it wasn't for the cat, Themisto would never have known that his fuku was folded in a funerary style. He had no idea such a thing even existed, and wasn't at all familiar with Japanese culture. Naturally, his cat seemed to know too much about it, and wouldn't shut up.

"Yeah, I know. It's called taking a break, Itsuki. You don't have to worry about runnin' around, you're all up in my outfit like a friggin' freeloader. How did you know you were my cat, anyway?"

The cat's ears folded and he made a face at his senshi. "Themi-chan, I told you~ It's just a feeling! I just know! And we have work to do. We can't just sit around~!" With a mischievous glint in his feline eyes, Itsuki made to wiggle himself against the Super Senshi's chest. Themisto was slightly ticklish, the cat came to find, and Themisto didn't appreciate it.

"EY. KNOCKITOFF." came a bark.

Itsuki's laughter was cut short by a strange energy signature on their peripherals. A tiny cat paw poked from the folded fuku and pointed in the direction of the park. "Ne, Themi-chan! There's somebody over here! Someone with a weird energy signature. We should go check it out!"

Themisto sighed and stood up from his leaning position on the side of the office building where he had taken a break. With a roll of his eyes, he started leisurely walking in the direction of the park. "Yeah, says you. You don't have to do any'a this walkin'. We this and we that, but you just sit on yo fuzzy a** doin'---"

"THEMI-CHAN, FOCUS."

The super senshi threw his hands up in defeat. "You are literally the worst cat ever."

Themisto wasn't expecting anyone or anything in particular, but Itsuki seemed convinced something of particular import was in the park. The super senshi took his leisurely time wandering in the general direction of the park and found himself surprised when an older man with a stern countenance accosted the pair. He felt less powerful than someone of Themisto's rank, but that didn't do much to detract from how incensed this guy seemed. Instinctively, the super senshi put his hands up in a display of peace. The cat in the folds of his fuku seemed incredibly excited, for whatever reason.

"Uwaa~!! It's a knight, Themi-chan! A real, live knight! I've read about them on the Headquarters computer!!" came a squeaky voice.

The super senshi looked down at the cat in surprise, then back up to the stern man who demanded to know who they were. Talking about this guy as if he wasn't even there was just asking for trouble. "Uh... hey uh, we don't mean any harm, mister. I'm Themisto. The freeloader is Itsuki. You uh... patrollin' around here?"

"He's so cool, Themi-chan! You can be cool like that too, you know."

Themisto fought the urge to clonk the cat on the head with his hand. "Itsuki, shutcherface."

"Mamertine?" came a bewildered reply from Themisto. He'd never heard of such a thing as a Mamertine. He knew Ovaltine chocolate drink mix, and Sensodyne toothpaste. He knew of the basic planets, like Pluto and Venus and all that, and a few extra stars and moons along the way.. "Is that uh... a planet, er a star er... somethin'? What's a Mamerine?"

Better to ask than to wallow in ignorance. Hopefully the Page wouldn't outright punch him in the face for asking stupid questions.

Itsuki, meanwhile, was beaming at Mamertine in a way only a cat could - making those squinty-eyed winky faces at the stern man, kneading his tiny bean toes on the edges of Themisto's fuku. The cat took it upon himself to answer Mamertine's most pressing question. "Themi-chan and I are out patrolling, looking for trouble to stop. That's our job! Stop Chaos and purge it from the city~"

Themisto huffed and stared down at the cat's head with a frown. "You are just a freeloader, cat. You don't do nothin' when s**t hits the fan."

Itsuki puffed up. "You haven't seen my neko-beemu yet, Themi-chan." The cat blew a raspberry at his senshi.

"Page of Pluuuuto~!" came an exuberant cry from Themisto's fuku. Itsuki was certainly impressed with the Page, even if his senshi ward wasn't sure what to make of the stern man. Themisto would have crossed his arms had Itsuki's fluffy head not been in the way. "Your uniform is sugoi~~~~, Mamertine-sama!"

The super senshi scoffed for a moment. "You... want a cat? This one's defective. Sometimes he doesn't speak English and just makes weird noises."

"HEEEEYYYY, Themi-chan, you don't know what you're trying to give up! I'm a Guardian Cat and it's part of my job to help guide you to be the best senshi you can be!" The feline bristled at the implication that he wasn't the best Guardian Cat he could be, all things considered. Did Themisto not understand and appreciate how much work he'd put in already?

"...even though you said like, twenty minutes ago, that you're still learnin' everything yourself? That you gotta read somethin' offa some computer someplace? Mister Guide?" came a sarcastic reply.

Itsuki's face drooped considerably. "Themi-chan... we all have to start somewhere!"

The senshi shrugged and placed his hands on his hips, shifting his weight on his strange and clunky new shoes. Better than geta, considerably so, but still not as good as a pair of running shoes, in his opinion. "What makes me think I'm qualified to stop Chaos? Dude, f-ck if I know. I didn't ask to have magical powers n' all this bullshit that goes with it. It's kinda cool though, jumpin' around like Spiderman and whatever, but the gettin' stabbed part is definitely not on my list of favorite things. What's your job, anyway? What's a Page supposed to do?"

"Duuuude." Themisto seemed impressed by Mamertine's lack of structure in his duties. More autonomy, more independence. It wasn't that the senshi thought he had someone higher up to report to more than Itsuki wouldn't shut up if Themisto tried to do whatever he felt like doing. Too much feline nagging for his taste. "So you're kinda... I dunno, like Batman? You know, doin' whatever you gotta do n' justice n' whatever, right? Justice."

Themisto made a pose he attributed to generic Western superheroes. Puffed chest, fists curled, shoulders back.

Itsuki rolled his feline eyes and flopped from the folds of Themisto's fuku to inspect Mamertine's regalia more closely. Poking gently at the intricate details of the Page's boots, the cat seemed impressed. "Uwaaa, Mamertine-sama, your outfit is sugoiiii~ I read that Pluto's knights have some of the most unique outfits~ Uwaaaa and to think, I got to meet one in person!" Ever the fanboy, the cat clapped his bean-toes together like a human might.

At the Page's request to see his magic, Themisto seemed downright stunned. Never one to stoic, emotions flashed very plainly on the boy's face. "Look, I ain't never met a Page outside a book and errythang but... I'm a be straight with you. I shoot ghosts. It's f#cked up and I don't wanna go blastin' ghoulies n' s**t at people unless they're Negaverse assholes so... I mean, I'll do it away from you, if you want, but... don't say I didn't warn ya."

Turning away from Mamertine, Themisto aimed at a point about ten feet in front of him and shouted, "Multorum Animos!"

From the depths of the underworld (or something like it) poured a host of ghostly apparitions, churning and wailing in disembodied voices. Themisto knew to back up swiftly to stay out of the specter's range and watched as they flowed forward, towards the trio. Arms outstretched, they sought to grab anything within distance, screaming and whispering ghoulish things before fading away after their journey had been completed.

"Brr. See? Toldja. F#cked up."

Themisto looked aghast. "Fascinating? Dude, I shoot ghosts." The super senshi couldn't believe someone other than his creepy sibling would be so interested in the fact that he shot ghosts at people. Shifting his weight, Themisto crossed his arms to regard Mamertine with a look that expressed just how bizarre he thought the Page was. Were many powered folks this interested in morbid projectiles?

"Whaddu they do? Beats me, other than f#ck somebody's s#it up. I've never been hit with it myself but... I dunno, seems to do the job just fine, whatever they do. Had one guy pissin' himself and screaming. Scary as hell, if you ask me. You fire lasers or somethin'? Got a gun or a knife or... I dunno, handcuffs? Bazooka?"

Itsuki seemed thrilled that the Page of Pluto had bent over just to speak to him more easily. The cat's tail wagged much like a dog's, the Mauvian rearing back to sit on his hind legs like a person might stand. Itsuki's added height made things slightly easier on Mamertine. "Haaaai~ Mamertine-sama, watashi wa nihongo o hanasemasu! But I'll try to remember just to stick to English, just for you, o-kay?"

cat_whee

To answer the Page's question, Itsuki nodded with enthusiasm. "Hai~! I upgraded Themi-chan, and gave him a new phone! I also awoke Sailor Takamizawa, Senshi of Surgery! We Mauvians, we're something special, don't you think? And very cute, too~"

Themisto rolled his eyes.

Itsuki seemed somewhat disappointed, ears drooping when it was clear Mamertine couldn't bridge the language barrier. "Uwahhh... sorry, Mamertine-sama."

Themisto regarded the Page curiously, tilting his head and crossing his arms in contemplation. It was clear something was churning in that head of his, the boy mulling something over. A few quiet moments passed before Themisto came to some satisfactory conclusion, nodding to himself in confidence. "Yep, yep, figured it out. You remind me of my sister. You guys talk the same. Similarly. You know, whatever. Anyway."

With a shrug, the super senshi dropped the analysis. It wasn't suited to him. The gavel, though he knew not the name, was something he immediately recognized. "Duuuude, you've got the... judge-y hammer thing. You know, clack clack yer a** is in jail, yadda yadda sucks-to-be-you, right? But like..." Leaning in, Themisto visually examined the thing in Mamertine's hand. It definitely looked like a gavel, the kind he'd seen on television. "...you only get a hammer and thassit? No... pewpew lasers or some sh#t? How're you supposed to... you know... kick some a**? Do ya hammer 'em to death?"

Itsuki took this opportunity to wind himself between Mamertine's legs, trilling and purring in an attempt to steal away some attention. After all, he was indescribably adorable, capable of melting the hearts of even the most icy of men. "Themi-chan, not everybody gets magic~ At least, not at first! I don't know much about knights like Mamertine-sama but... they have abilities, too!"

Tch the super senshi spat. "Well if somebody would just up n' outfit us with some bazookas or whatever, this war would be over by now."

The cat's face screwed up in an unreadable expression. "Themi-chaaaan, think of the property damage!"

Themisto sighed deeply. Another one to add to the list of takes everything too seriously.

The boy jerked a thumb to himself and smirked. "Well, now you met another one who's outta school. But... I'm pretty cool. You like me, right?" When it came down to it, Themisto didn't really care either way if this Mamertine guy liked him or not. Having information about Pages and their like was useful, sure, but Mamertine reminded him too much of his sibling. It was difficult to be open and buddy-buddy with someone who kept scrutinizing you at all times.

Itsuki pawed at Mamertine's boot with a pathetic mew. "Someday, Mamertine-sama, we'll have gotten rid of all the Chaos and then everyone can live in peace again! That's what I hope for, anyway. It's very difficult when most everyone is working individually. I met some other cats, and they agree, but getting people together is dangerous, they said. Still, I think, someday..." Itsuki paused for a moment and nodded to himself. "We had peace once, so... I think, if we work hard enough, we can have peace again. Don't you think so too, Mamertine-sama?"

As much as Themisto knew Itsuki believed his hope-and-peace mumbo jumbo, the super senshi had a slightly different view of things. "I think these Chaos a$$holes are batsh#t crazy, personally. I've been stabbed," He lifted a hand to begin counting on his fingers. "Been almost eaten a few times, nearly got gored by this friggin alien rhino-thing, this crazy a-hole from the Negaverse brought a giant monster posse with him and tried to kill or eat an effton of us... I'm tellin' you, bazookas. Take care a' this sh#t real quick. Wish I could sue the hell outta the Negaverse just for medical bills alone."

Itsuki's ears drooped.