(backdated to April 22)

A sigh escaped the woman as she closed the old tome with care. The brittle pages had felt near ready to crumble into dust under her fingers and she dared not risk the tome’s destruction. Though she couldn’t decipher the words there was always the chance that Cashel could. And, if how fragile the paper had been, she feared too far of a venture into the book would cause irrevocable harm. So, with great care she added the tome to a pile similar to itself; Those fragile but still useable if used under the most careful of care.

It had taken her many hours to get as far as she had but as she gazed across the room, the redhead was greeted with piles and piles of books and scrolls. All of them unorganized in any sense, instead they’d just been sorted as useable and a complete lost cause. So much more needed to be done. A bubble of anxiety welled up on her chest followed quickly by frustration. There were so many emotions floating around in her, each one taking its turn as needed, that Hy was beginning to grow uneasy with herself. Her own personal emotions were mixing in with the problems of her Wonder. In frustration she nearly shoved a pile of books over as she launched from her seat on the floor to storm out of the room and down the stairs.

The steady, rhythmic sound of boots on stone stairs echoed down the tower as the squire made haste to the main level where she sought an exit to the derelict castle and into the courtyard. The courtyard, once as unkempt as the castle, was rid of the wild flowers and weeds that had grown in places that they would have normally been barred from. In other places, old beds of sand and dirt, there had been flowers well places. All were natives to the Wonder, having been collected just outside the walls but were now well placed within their new beds.As a whole, the courtyard looked more inviting. The only thing left was to get the fountain flowing again but that was a task the squire wasn’t sure how to go about. So it sat untouched for the time being, having only been rid of the weeds that had made their home in it.

Hy-Brasil paid the well tended courtyard little mind as she hurried through the courtyard and out the main gates. The cobblestone path leading from the castle wound through the rolling hills, but Hy-Brasil ignored it. Instead she turned off of it after only about 30 paces along. Her intent was towards the cliffs where she could look down upon the beach, the rolling waves and the misty fog that encircled the entire perimeter of her Wonder. She needed solace. She sought nature to help heal her soul.

The cliffs loomed over the beach and Hy-brasil looked over the edge. A brief sense of vertigo hit the squire as she peered down to the beach directly below. To keep herself from losing her balance entirely she stepped back from the precipice and allowed herself to drop unceremoniously amongst the tall grass. A gentle breeze from the ocean tipped the grasses which grazed against Hy. Those tall enough to reach tickled the underside of her chin, but she didn’t move. Instead she tilted her head to the sky, red hair cascading over her shoulders and back as she sat mesmerized by the blue skies mottled with white clouds. Tears welled up in her crystal blue eyes as she allowed her emotions to surface.

Her heart still hurt. Her mind a torrent of different emotions and none of them wanted to play nice. They certainly weren’t going away no matter how hard she tried to repress them. Her knees came to her chest, arms wrapped around them as she rest her aching head on them. She sat there ruminating as she gazed into the fog that lay ahead of her. It was strangely comforting to see nothing but the mist as she looked straight out from the cliff side. It was quiet, private and safe and those three keys allowed the woman to open herself up to let the trapped tears fall. Eyes squinted shut as she sobbed a bit, moving her head to bury her face in her legs. A curtain of red hair added to the privacy.

Her tears were for her own loss. Her loss of Isaiah, her loss of time, and her loss of herself. She felt like she’d put so much of herself to the side to be better equipped to deal with Isaiah. It wasn’t his fault. Hy knew that, she let herself fall into bad habits. Hell, she had thought she was over giving up herself for others but apparently that hadn’t been true. She fell back into her old ways and she couldn’t help but wonder if that had played a hand in Isaiah pulling away from her in the end or was this all just destined to be?

She sat there for a length of time. The sun had repositioned itself in the sky, sinking towards the west before she finally budged again. Her body and mind felt heavy as she shuffled to stand. Despite her indulgence she felt no better for it. Instead she felt like more of a failure for having let herself become overwhelmed by emotions she had been dead determined to push under the rug. How stupid could she be? Why couldn’t she just get over it all?

Another fit of rage resulted in her grasping for a random stone which she hurled out over the cliffside. It faded into the mist and not even the sound of it hitting the water could be heard over the crashing of the waves. Tears threatened again to flow down her cheeks but she wiped them away in anger onto a green sleeve. “No. no more.” she said at herself in a fit of rage. “I can’t stay like this.” Her voice was stern yet soft as she took a shaky breath.

Closing her eyes, Hy attempted to collect herself again. Using the sound of the waves and the breeze floating through the grasses to help ease her. One breath then another. Hy-Brasil worked to rein in her troubled mind to beat it into submission.

After what felt like an eternity she opened her eyes again and in control of herself. Or at least a quasi sense of being in control. It would do for now. She’d be able to at least work until she finally passed out for the night which, if her breakdown was any indication, would not be long past nightfall. At least she had planned for staying on the Wonder and was well equipped. A bag full of her necessities lay within the chamber she had chosen as her own. Of course, that didn’t necessarily keep Cashel out when the old man felt the need to pester his successor. Still it was her spot in the castle and she looked forward to curling up and sleeping the night in its entirety. That was a luxury she didn’t allot herself very often. Duty always took precedent over her needs anymore.

Eventually the squire turned from the cliff side. The wind pushed at her retreating back as she made her way back to the castle where she intended to continue the large job she had left behind. It wasn’t going to get finished that day. It wasn’t going to be finished the next day either, but she’d continue to pluck away at getting the castle put back together each day at a time. Eventually her hard work would bear fruit and she’d be able to see the revitalization of her Wonder. For the time being, she just had to hold onto hope and that want to succeed in her endeavor no matter how frustrating it and her personal life may become.