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 Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:17 am
Virell didn’t often need advice about feelings, and even now he wasn’t sure what he was thinking. He’d had a dream last night and woke up feeling odd. Usually when he dreamed about Nick it was straightforward. He’d fallen asleep on the couch in the middle of had been some oversaturated, sappy romance movie and apparently it had been enough to keep his brain occupied for the first half of the day.
He usually thought about Nick regularly, but this was a little more extreme and it made him wonder. Was this a crush? Or was it something more?
He had friends he could talk to but there was the problem that most of his friends were in the modeling business with him and things like that were weaknesses. He didn’t want anyone to tease him or know what was going on.
So, he’d called up the only girl he knew that wasn’t involved in modeling.
Of course, she didn’t even know what a hickey was, but he needed to talk to someone. So, he’d bribed her with milkshakes and was waiting for her to show up. He was already halfway through his, trying not to look at pictures of him and Nick like some desperate fool.
Clinginess was so unattractive, and right now he felt hideous—even if he’d spent nearly two hours to get made up and perfect before leaving the house.
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:18 am
Carlee never turned up a chance for milkshakes, and she never turned up a chance to see Virell either. When he had asked her to come and meet him at the ice cream place and he would get her some milkshakes...well she just couldn’t say no to that!
Her bruises were long gone and she was in a very, very good mood from most everything that was going on...mostly due to the fact that it had been quite a while since the last time she almost got herself killed, so that was a very good thing indeed. Spotting the blonde, Carlee crept up behind him, flinging her arms around his neck and squeezing.
“Virell! You’re here~ How are you? I’m so excited to have a milkshake with youuuu~” She paused, seeing that he already had one and frowned. “You started without me? I hope this means you’re having two! I don’t want to sit here like a ninny and eat mine all alone! Or you could just buy us both two to make up for it, okay?”
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:18 am
Virell let out a slightly startled noise when her arms flew around his neck but he relaxed as soon as he recognized her voice. He turned his phone over to hide the screen and laughed slightly. “I don’t know if I could finish two! But you have to forgive me, I had meant to save it, I just—I’ve sort of been a little absentminded,” he said, sighing wistfully.
He pulled out a few dollars and passed them over to her. “Go get yourself whichever one you want, I have to talk to you. About something important—but not bad,” he insisted. “It’s about a boy. So you go get started on one milkshake and if you need another one, we’ll get another one. I needed a head start on mine, see, because I intend to do a lot of talking. So,” he put the money in her hands and shooed her towards the line. “Go get your milkshake and come back so you can help me!”
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:19 am
“A boy!” Carlee almost shrieked in deilght and took the money, running off to buy herself a milkshake. When she returned, the cold pink drink in her hand she sat next to Virell, looking excited. “You have a boy you like? Tell me all about him! I need to know about your love life, Virelllllll!”
This was exciting. This was so grown up...Arias didn’t talk about his boyfriend unless Carlee made him, and she even knew Nick! But...but Arias still thought of her as a little girl who didn’t know anything about boys, but she wasn’t. She was a teenager who...well. Thought she knew something, at least...even though she didn’t have any boys that she had her eyes on or anything...she still knew they were there!
“Tell me everything! What’s going on? Do you have a super attractive boyfriend that you want to introduce me to? Do I have to approve of him, because if he makes you happy, I totally approve...but if he doesn’t, I’ll kick him. In the...in the knees.”
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:19 am
Virell just laughed and shook his head. “No, no knee kicking or anything like that. I don’t know if we’re even together—I mean, we said it was casual, so it’s casual. Which is usually fine! I mean, there’s a lot of people in the world, I understand not wanting to be tied down so soon in life.”
He reached for his milkshake and began to stir contemplatively.
“But,” he said after a second, “The problem is that I went into this figuring it was casual—he’s super attractive, super charming, super fun. Basically perfect, you know? Except. I don’t know if he wants to be anything more than…”
He seemed thoughtful and then just shrugged. “Friends with benefits. I mean, I don’t even know if that’s what I want—I’ve been in relationships, but most of the time it was because I don’t know, I was lonely? My relationships…were sort of out of mutual convenience rather than love. I’ve had a lot of boyfriends. And a lot of breakups.”
Most of the time they didn’t even hurt, but he wasn’t having this conversation to reminisce about relationships.
“So, what I’m asking is…” His lips pursed and he poked at the milkshake before finally lifting his eyes to meet hers. “…How do you know if you’re in love?”
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:19 am
Carlee nodded thoughtfully. “So…so you guys aren’t dating…not yet, right? Well…maybe you should ask him if he wants to date you? Because I don’t know, Virell…I don’t know if you can be in love before you date someone for real! Like…do you two talk about stuff? Do you know things about him? Like, what he likes and all of that?”
She took a very large sip of her own drink and made a face as the cold rushed to her head, making a sharp pain lance through it.
You just couldn’t drink frozen things that quickly and not pay for it.
“Or, maybe Virell…you should tell him what you’re feeling? And see if he feels the same way…? I don’t know. I’ve never been in love, but I think it’s supposed to feel like butterflies in your stomach and you’re supposed to think about the person a lot, and you sound like you’re thinking about him a lot. My brother’s in love with someone, so I mean, I get my information from watching him!”
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:19 am
“No, no,” Virell insisted quickly. He couldn’t just come clean to Nick, he’d make everything awkward. “It’s complicated,” he insisted. He chewed on his lower lip and his eyes fell to the table. He tapped his fingers on the table and hesitated for a long moment. “I mean, I think…”
Oh, she was going to hate him. Please don’t let her hate him.
“I think…he might…have a boyfriend already…”
His eyes flicked up quickly to try and read her face without being so obvious about it; he had to force his gaze back to the table. “I…don’t want to be a homewrecker. But if I tell him how I feel, maybe things get too complicated. Things are already complicated! What if telling him just pushes him away? I don’t know if he’ll break up with his boyfriend. I mean, if he was going to, wouldn’t he have done it already? Oh,” he sighed and flopped his head loudly on the table.
“I don’t know what I’m doing. I just. I really like him, Carlee,” he groaned, not bothering to push himself back up.
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:20 am
“Oh!” Well! That was something she hadn’t been expecting! The guy that Virell liked already had someone else that he liked? That was crazy! Like one of the soap operas that dominated day time television…how interesting this guy was!
“So you’re…you’re trying to steal someone’s boyfriend, Virell that’s naughty!” She was teasing, but when he looked so sad, she reached over and patted his head. “But…how will you know if he even knows that you want him to break up with his boyfriend? Virell, you can’t keep all of this to yourself! You need to tell him!”
Carlee rubbed his back and seemed just a little worried about him. “This seems like it’s really eating you up…just tell him, Virell…why wouldn’t he love you too? You’re the best guy ever, apart from my brother.” He wasn’t normally the kind of person to be this down in the dumps…and that worried her.
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:20 am
Virell just sighed and lifted his head finally, rubbing at his forehead. “I don’t want to steal him, I just want him to be mine. But I don’t think he feels the same way, or wouldn’t he have said something? I’ve sort of teased about him running away to be with me—but I don’t think it’s something he’s ever taken seriously. I just don’t want to mess things up. I don’t know if I’ve ever been in love. What if this is just indigestion?”
He sighed and planted his elbow on the table so he could prop his chin up into the palm of his hand. “If I start asking for more, maybe I’m asking for too much. What if he doesn’t want to leave his boyfriend? –I mean, should he? What if he wants to stop seeing me? Oh my god, Carlee,” he sighed, “My stomach is tied into a knot just thinking about it. I don’t handle rejection well. My ego would be totally blasted. I’d never date again. Oh,” he sighed. “I should just not say anything, Carlee, I know it. Nobody likes a clingy third wheel. I just, I’ve been having these dreams about him and it’s not like me to pine, okay? I—Look at this,” he gestured to himself. “I can have any guy I want!” he insisted, but the bravado failed shortly after and he deflated.
“Except, maybe, the one I really want. Maybe I just need to go join more dating websites. You want to help me pick some out?” he asked, already pulling up the first dating app he had on his phone.
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:21 am
“But if you teased about it…why would he take you seriously, Virell? No, no don’t go thinking that! You like him, you might even love him! So fight for him! You deserve to be happy, and going on dating sites and finding trashy guys is not the way to go!” Carlee huffed and tugged the phone out of his hand, closing out of the app and giving the blonde a stern look.
“Text him. Text this guy right now and tell him you want to go to dinner with him. Don’t fight me on this, Virell. Text him right now, and tell him you’re going to dinner, and I’ll bring my brother with me, and that way I can make sure everything’s going well with you, and you can tell this guy how you feel and you can get your happily ever after. Tex him now Virell! You deserve this!”
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:21 am
Virell fumbled with his phone. “Are you sure?” he asked after a long moment. “I don’t want to pressure him, if we’re out in public. I haven’t told anyone—and I don’t know if you can believe it—but I’m actually very ugly when I cry. And I’m a sore loser—and I don’t handle rejection well. But.” He was quiet for a minute and sucked in a breath. “…I suppose I have some waterproof makeup I could try out.”
His eyes sought hers. “I’m okay with trashy guys,” he insisted quickly, trying to cling to some justification not to message Nick. Not to mess all of this up. His hand trembled just slightly as he slowly made his way to his contacts.
“I don’t know, Carlee,” he said, voice quieter. “I really, really don’t want to mess this up. I don’t have anyone else to go to for relationship advice. Are you sure? If he doesn’t like me that way…I just…I want him to like me, a lot. But I’d rather not tell him if it meant…I lost him.”
But there were other fish in the sea, right? Worst comes to worst? Sure, they weren’t all powered, or that handsome, or that charming, and this was the first time he felt like he’d had a connection…
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:22 am
“You’re beautiful, crying or not! And I’m sure he knows that, and I’m sure he’s just being…I’m sure he just doesn’t know how you feel, so you go and you tell him just how you feel, and then he’ll smile and say how much he loves you and how he’s been carrying a ring around in his pocket and he’s been waiting to give it to you when you finally told him you loved him, and then I’ll be your maid of honor, since I’m clearly your best friend and you’ll ride off into the sunset with this guy and live happily ever after, so text him, right now, Virell. Right. Now!”
“And besides! If you start to ugly cry, you can come snuggle me and I’ll make my brother give us cookies and we can have a sleep over, okay?”
She paused. “Not that you’ll ugly cry, but still. Having a backup plan is important…but stop putting this off! Text him!”
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Posted: Tue May 02, 2017 1:22 am
Virell thought for a moment longer and then smiled as convincingly as he could. “Okay, okay. I’ll text him. I mean, I don’t think he’s got all that going on, but…”
When had it become so nice to dream?
Virell felt his cheeks heating up as he pulled out his phone and thought about Nick giving him a ring, and about their wedding, and about waking up next to Nick every morning for the rest of his life…
Oh, it was too much.
“No matter what happens, at least I’ve got you, right?” He chanced a quick smile as he selected Nick’s name and carefully typed him a text to meet up for dinner the next night. “Even if there isn’t a wedding, you can still be my maid of honor. We’ll go shopping and get dressed up and go out on the town looking for hot, young studs.”
He paused and eyed her over his phone. “...Well, I will. You’re too young. I don’t know. We’ll figure it out.”
Tomorrow night, at least he’d figure something out.
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