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Posted: Mon Apr 17, 2017 11:41 pm
Character Name: Mhysa Age: 12 years Race: Machka Gender: F Appearance:  Abilities: Minimal Air Magic - Which she tries to use for floating things towards her in short distances, like eggs or cups of flour, but usually, she ends up dropping them mid-air. This magic is really just to improve personal air flow, making her breathing easier when it's prone to sustained coughing fits, which is frequently. Weaknesses: Health Issues - Like the majority of her species, Mhysa is a sickly creature. Born particularly pale and thin, Mhysa is prone to falling ill more often than her kinsfolk, especially if she is seen out of doors. As a result, she must stay inside.
Clumsiness - As if having various ailments at any given time wasn't bad enough, Mhysa is plagued by clumsiness. Between dealing with literal butter fingers (she is a pastry chef, after all) and a tendency to trip over her own tail, she can get pretty messy in the kitchen. She thought using her air magic for levitation magic to carry things around might be a little easier on her, but... That just ends up making things worse, usually. Personality: If there's one thing about Mhysa that you can say with certainty, it's that she's determined to try her best through the course of her lfie. Of course, that's a little difficult, on account of Mhysa's diagnosed house arrest. Unable to go outside for fear of inhaling the wrong kind of pollen, Mhysa has never learned the social skills that would have come with playing with other children or adults that weren't her parents. In fact, the only ones she really knows are her parents (and Framboise, of course.) This puts her at a disadvantage, for she can come across rather blunt when she's trying to get to know someone and bluntness isn't really great for customer service needed in a bakery.
Mhysa does try, though. She watches her mother work with the customers at the counter and observes her mother's mannerisms while she's chatting pleasantly with the patrons of their bakery. She's learning slowly that soft voices are better than loud ones and asking that someone is particularly fat is considered rude (even if they are.) Her parents help tutor her in manners too. After all, when she gets a little better with customers, she'll be in charge of the counter and when she's older, the bakery will go to her, while her parents will retire. (Ideally, she'll be so good with interacting with others that they'll be able to hire another worker to pick up the work they'll be leaving in their old age.)
It's frustrating sometimes, having to learn what she should have been exposed to earlier in her life, had she only had the chance to meet children from, as she puts it, "The Outside." She doesn't always like learning that what she's been doing and saying is considered rude and if it didn't send her into a coughing fit, she would throw tantrums more often about it. On a deeper level, it's frustrating not to be able to have the same opportunities, just because of the way she was born. Mhysa would love to go outside. She would love to meet new people and eat new food and breathe new air, but her parents have made it quite clear that going out would be fatal (they've even shown her papers written up by her doctor when she was very little to prove that they're not just being overprotective.) It's frustrating, but on some days, it's more than a little depressing too. It sounds so hopeless in the long run, being stuck in the same place, day in and day out, with no change in scenery. On these days in particular, Mhysa stops trying altogether. It becomes too hard to try, when everything seems like it's for nothing. It's these days that Framboise helps her the most, for Framboise is very full of life and just by having the Tiri there seems to be enough to get Mhysa back to work the next day.
It's the days after the "Bad Days" that Mhysa is the most energetic. It's as though Framboise breathes life back into her. Suddenly our Machka wants to help out in the bakery, making all manner of delicious sweets, or learn more about the correct and incorrect manners for customer services... Sometimes, her mother will even let her pull up a stool by the counter and package the baked goods, while her mother and the customer speak and exchange money. Those days are the "Best Days".
Overall, Mhysa is able to keep a fairly positive outlook on her life, even considering the circumstances. She's determined to keep bettering herself and can hardly wait until the day comes where she'll be able to speak normally with the customers that come in and exchange the cookies she made for coins. She eagerly awaits that day and her parents do too, though...They just hope she'll live to see it. Character History: Mhysa's birth was a difficult one for the entire family. For one thing, it was hard on her mother, Neela, who was young and small-waisted when she became pregnant. For another, Mhysa had a twin sister. For the last thing (for everything comes in threes, or didn't you know?) it was predicted to be a difficult birth and so it was.
Mhysa came first and started coughing rather than breathing as soon as air filled her lungs. Her twin came next, but never got a chance to breathe. The infant was stillborn. The healer carried the small body out to dispose of it discreetly and Neela, who had not realized she was carrying two, was told instead that she had given birth to a beautiful baby girl. Her partner, Jaz, while heartbroken at the loss of one daughter, was happy to forget and to happier still to dote upon his daughter.
The couple would face various hardships, realizing that Mhysa would not be able to go outside and play with others her age. They owned a humble bakery in a small town, but with the best interests of their daughter, wanting her to get a social life, despite what would have to be a life indoors (for they soon found that the outdoors was full with all sorts of pollens and bacterias and other scary things that Mhysa's body could not handle) the family sold their old bakery and opened a new one in the Machka capital: Tantrii.
Mhysa only remembers fragments of her old home, but she loves Tantrii with all her heart. So many interesting faces come through the bakery and she puts all of her effort into putting a smile on every one of them! She loves help her mother at the counter, though most of her work is in the back, baking with her father. It's a happy life. Sure, she wishes she could go outside and see the sights outside her cozy shop, but between her parents (oh, and don't forget Framboise!) she's happy as can be, for the time being. Bonded With: Framboise Bonding Story: Her parents soon realized how in need of a friend their daughter was. It wasn't an ordinary friend that Mhysa needed either, she needed someone to stay at her side and watch out for her when they couldn't. So, Jaz went out into the capital despite his shy nature and looked high and low for a scroll that might fit his daughter. Eventually, he managed to acquire one (by completely legal means, mind you) and that evening, he and his partner presented it to their delighted daughter.
From that scroll came Framboise, a Tiri Astral who takes immense delight in tasting everything that Mhysa makes. The two are always together and Framboise is the one that rushes for help whenever Mhysa has one of her frequent coughing fits. (Think of Framboise like a service dog.)
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Posted: Wed Apr 19, 2017 1:50 pm
Hey here! *waves* 4laugh I feel that with only minor tweaks this profile will be ready for approval, so here's some feedback -
There are two things that stand out to me about this profile: the age and the personality.
20 years old is kind of old for a Machka, especially one as sickly as her. She would be in her middle ages (think around 40 in human terms). This isn't necessarily a problem but something to keep in mind when role playing: she would not be a young girl at all. If you wanted to play a woman in her middle ages then this is fine, but you can always bump her age down if you wanted to play the Machka equivalent of a 20 year old. 3nodding (I think it's also important to think about the age of her parents - are they still able to run the bakery at their advanced age?)
The only real issue I see is her personality section. I feel that you could be more specific and add more details. When I read this profile I don't feel like I really understand Mhysa's character. What does it take to make her angry? What are things she dislikes? What's her favorite thing about running a bakery? How does she feel about the fact that despite her strong desire to makes friends, most of her customers don't really speak to her? Small details like this can really make your character come to life. heart
Again, this profile only needs minor tweaks before it can be approved. 4laugh I look forward to seeing this character in action! heart
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PlatonicMistress Vice Captain
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Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2017 3:10 am
PlatonicMistress Hey here! *waves* 4laugh I feel that with only minor tweaks this profile will be ready for approval, so here's some feedback - There are two things that stand out to me about this profile: the age and the personality. 20 years old is kind of old for a Machka, especially one as sickly as her. She would be in her middle ages (think around 40 in human terms). This isn't necessarily a problem but something to keep in mind when role playing: she would not be a young girl at all. If you wanted to play a woman in her middle ages then this is fine, but you can always bump her age down if you wanted to play the Machka equivalent of a 20 year old. 3nodding (I think it's also important to think about the age of her parents - are they still able to run the bakery at their advanced age?) The only real issue I see is her personality section. I feel that you could be more specific and add more details. When I read this profile I don't feel like I really understand Mhysa's character. What does it take to make her angry? What are things she dislikes? What's her favorite thing about running a bakery? How does she feel about the fact that despite her strong desire to makes friends, most of her customers don't really speak to her? Small details like this can really make your character come to life. heart Again, this profile only needs minor tweaks before it can be approved. 4laugh I look forward to seeing this character in action! heart I wasn't quite sure what the Machka equivalent to 20 would be, so I cut her in half by ten years: is that good enough? It's fine if she's a little younger than 20 too, since I re-wrote her personality as slightly younger sounding. I hope this will give you better insight to what she's like as a character, though I have changed some things. She's no longer quite the extrovert as the first draft had her, making her more socially awkward around others--though it's explained why in the current draft. I can't wait to hear your feedback again! Thank you so much! heart
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Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2017 9:15 am
belloblossom PlatonicMistress Hey here! *waves* 4laugh I feel that with only minor tweaks this profile will be ready for approval, so here's some feedback - There are two things that stand out to me about this profile: the age and the personality. 20 years old is kind of old for a Machka, especially one as sickly as her. She would be in her middle ages (think around 40 in human terms). This isn't necessarily a problem but something to keep in mind when role playing: she would not be a young girl at all. If you wanted to play a woman in her middle ages then this is fine, but you can always bump her age down if you wanted to play the Machka equivalent of a 20 year old. 3nodding (I think it's also important to think about the age of her parents - are they still able to run the bakery at their advanced age?) The only real issue I see is her personality section. I feel that you could be more specific and add more details. When I read this profile I don't feel like I really understand Mhysa's character. What does it take to make her angry? What are things she dislikes? What's her favorite thing about running a bakery? How does she feel about the fact that despite her strong desire to makes friends, most of her customers don't really speak to her? Small details like this can really make your character come to life. heart Again, this profile only needs minor tweaks before it can be approved. 4laugh I look forward to seeing this character in action! heart I wasn't quite sure what the Machka equivalent to 20 would be, so I cut her in half by ten years: is that good enough? It's fine if she's a little younger than 20 too, since I re-wrote her personality as slightly younger sounding. I hope this will give you better insight to what she's like as a character, though I have changed some things. She's no longer quite the extrovert as the first draft had her, making her more socially awkward around others--though it's explained why in the current draft. I can't wait to hear your feedback again! Thank you so much! heart The average is about forty to fifty years of age, though if they are extremely careful and manage a healthy lifestyle, they can live to be up to seventy years old. This means that the age of maturity comes much sooner than other races, with Machka being considered an adult around 15 years old. So 10 in Machka years would be teenager! smile If you are going for young adult, then 15 would be good. If you're looking for teenager, 10 is perfect.
Everything looks great! As soon as you decide which way you want to go with age, I'll give you the approval! I can't wait to RP smile
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Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2017 10:53 am
Kyribird belloblossom PlatonicMistress Hey here! *waves* 4laugh I feel that with only minor tweaks this profile will be ready for approval, so here's some feedback - There are two things that stand out to me about this profile: the age and the personality. 20 years old is kind of old for a Machka, especially one as sickly as her. She would be in her middle ages (think around 40 in human terms). This isn't necessarily a problem but something to keep in mind when role playing: she would not be a young girl at all. If you wanted to play a woman in her middle ages then this is fine, but you can always bump her age down if you wanted to play the Machka equivalent of a 20 year old. 3nodding (I think it's also important to think about the age of her parents - are they still able to run the bakery at their advanced age?) The only real issue I see is her personality section. I feel that you could be more specific and add more details. When I read this profile I don't feel like I really understand Mhysa's character. What does it take to make her angry? What are things she dislikes? What's her favorite thing about running a bakery? How does she feel about the fact that despite her strong desire to makes friends, most of her customers don't really speak to her? Small details like this can really make your character come to life. heart Again, this profile only needs minor tweaks before it can be approved. 4laugh I look forward to seeing this character in action! heart I wasn't quite sure what the Machka equivalent to 20 would be, so I cut her in half by ten years: is that good enough? It's fine if she's a little younger than 20 too, since I re-wrote her personality as slightly younger sounding. I hope this will give you better insight to what she's like as a character, though I have changed some things. She's no longer quite the extrovert as the first draft had her, making her more socially awkward around others--though it's explained why in the current draft. I can't wait to hear your feedback again! Thank you so much! heart The average is about forty to fifty years of age, though if they are extremely careful and manage a healthy lifestyle, they can live to be up to seventy years old. This means that the age of maturity comes much sooner than other races, with Machka being considered an adult around 15 years old. So 10 in Machka years would be teenager! smile If you are going for young adult, then 15 would be good. If you're looking for teenager, 10 is perfect.
Everything looks great! As soon as you decide which way you want to go with age, I'll give you the approval! I can't wait to RP smile
I ended up bumping her up to 12, if that's alright, hoping she could be somewhere between that 17-19 "not quite a teen, not quite an adult" stage. Does that work? I can always move her down to 10 again, I was just looking to create a slightly older teen.
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Posted: Mon Apr 24, 2017 10:59 am
belloblossom Kyribird belloblossom PlatonicMistress Hey here! *waves* 4laugh I feel that with only minor tweaks this profile will be ready for approval, so here's some feedback - There are two things that stand out to me about this profile: the age and the personality. 20 years old is kind of old for a Machka, especially one as sickly as her. She would be in her middle ages (think around 40 in human terms). This isn't necessarily a problem but something to keep in mind when role playing: she would not be a young girl at all. If you wanted to play a woman in her middle ages then this is fine, but you can always bump her age down if you wanted to play the Machka equivalent of a 20 year old. 3nodding (I think it's also important to think about the age of her parents - are they still able to run the bakery at their advanced age?) The only real issue I see is her personality section. I feel that you could be more specific and add more details. When I read this profile I don't feel like I really understand Mhysa's character. What does it take to make her angry? What are things she dislikes? What's her favorite thing about running a bakery? How does she feel about the fact that despite her strong desire to makes friends, most of her customers don't really speak to her? Small details like this can really make your character come to life. heart Again, this profile only needs minor tweaks before it can be approved. 4laugh I look forward to seeing this character in action! heart I wasn't quite sure what the Machka equivalent to 20 would be, so I cut her in half by ten years: is that good enough? It's fine if she's a little younger than 20 too, since I re-wrote her personality as slightly younger sounding. I hope this will give you better insight to what she's like as a character, though I have changed some things. She's no longer quite the extrovert as the first draft had her, making her more socially awkward around others--though it's explained why in the current draft. I can't wait to hear your feedback again! Thank you so much! heart The average is about forty to fifty years of age, though if they are extremely careful and manage a healthy lifestyle, they can live to be up to seventy years old. This means that the age of maturity comes much sooner than other races, with Machka being considered an adult around 15 years old. So 10 in Machka years would be teenager! smile If you are going for young adult, then 15 would be good. If you're looking for teenager, 10 is perfect.
Everything looks great! As soon as you decide which way you want to go with age, I'll give you the approval! I can't wait to RP smile
I ended up bumping her up to 12, if that's alright, hoping she could be somewhere between that 17-19 "not quite a teen, not quite an adult" stage. Does that work? I can always move her down to 10 again, I was just looking to create a slightly older teen. Works perfect smile Giving stamp of approval
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