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 Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2017 2:57 pm
Kari was afraid. She was honest to goodness afraid. She hadn’t powered up for well over a week, not since the disaster of a meeting…the betrayal from Epidote…and from Stella, since it was her partner who had done it…and then that corrupt senshi she had run into right after…
It was enough to give her nightmares…and it did. A lot of them. Nightmares of death, nightmares of darkness…so much darkness.
On the night she was supposed to have rendezvoused with Stellerite…she stayed in bed, pillows over her head and just…tried to tune out the world…but she missed the blonde.
She missed the kisses and the encouraging words…she missed feeling so loved…so two weeks after the last time she saw Stella, she was back at their meeting place, guarded…but there.
It was fully her intention to tell the lieutenant that this was it. That they were through, that she couldn’t trust her anymore after what had happened…but the very thought of doing that made her dizzy and short of breath…and she wasn’t sure if she should just go home and give all this up for a bad job…
If she had been smart that would have been what she did…but just because she was in college, didn’t mean she had the brains to back that up. So, Kari sat there, waiting.
Maybe Stella wouldn’t even show up.
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Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2017 3:03 pm
Last week had been a disaster. Even now, Stellerite had a sour taste in her mouth that wasn't alleviated by the confrontation with Epidote after Kari failed to show up for their meeting.
She didn't know why she was bothering to try again, the following week, after she'd been stood up, but she had already invested so much time in to Kari that she wasn't ready to give up.
So, two minute until the usual time, Stellerite approached the designated meeting spot. Around her neck was the scarf that Kari had painstakingly knit her and in her hands was a box, filled with various treats from one of the local bakeries.
When she spotted the senshi, and felt the singular aura, relief flooded her. "Kari. Oh thank god." She gasped, looking relieved to see the brunette. "Epi told me what happened. I'm so sorry Kari, he's still new. He got confused. " The explanation came out in a rush. "When you weren't here last week...I..." Tears welled up in those blue eyes of hers. "I was d-devst-tated. I miss you, sweetie. Please."
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Posted: Fri Feb 24, 2017 4:23 pm
Kari stiffened when she felt the aura of a lieutenant nearing, and her muscles tensed as though she were about to run. If it turned out not to be Stella…and was Epidote instead…she would get out of there as quickly as she could. She wanted nothing to do with him. Nothing at all…but, it didn’t come to that. It was Stella.
Quickly, the senshi averted her eyes when the blonde began to talk…though she had noticed the scarf…and her heart thumped painfully in her chest at the sight.
Just tell her she couldn’t do this anymore. Tell her that her partner had tried to kill her and…and she couldn’t forgive that. Just…tell her to go away…
Kari opened her mouth to say these things, but no words came out. It was almost as though she had no voice left anymore. Her hands felt clammy and she was just…uncomfortable. Much to uncomfortable to be here with Stella…her Stella.
She tried again, opening her mouth, and this time, managed to choke out a few words. “He…got confused? He tried to kill me, Stella…your partner tried to kill me…how…how could you possibly think that’s okay?” Kari couldn’t raise her head from the ground. She couldn’t look at the lieutenant. She heard the tears in her voice…heard the emotion in it, and there was no way she could look up and see all of that…she would break if she saw that.
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Posted: Sat Feb 25, 2017 6:42 pm
Biting back her anger and frustration about the situation was harder than she would have liked, even as the tears pooled in the corner of her eyes and she clutched tightly onto the box in her hands. "Kari, sweetie, please - " she tried, only for the brunette to interrupt her
Her voice was shaky and so was her breath as it eased out of her mouth.
"Epi didn't know better." Well he did, but he'd forgotten and now everything was falling apart despite her attempts to keep it all together. It was like a messed up stitch in her knitting that she couldn't fix because it'd become knotted and she'd seen it too late.
"Kari." There was a firmness to her voice, one that said just listen and she hoped the order was followed. "I didn't say that. No, it's not okay." She had told her brother as much. "Kari, I've had plenty of chances to hurt you if I wanted and I don't want to hurt you. Why would you think that? Don't you know that I care about you? I care about you so much." Cue the sniffle and the choked sob.
"Sweetie, please. I know I can't just kiss it and make it better but I promise he will never, ever hurt you again." Not unless it was on her direct orders. "I already - I handled it. He's willing to do whatever to make it up to you - us." She took a tentative step closer. "I brought you - I got you a present and I was hoping you'd let me show you how sorry I am."
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Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2017 6:17 am
Kari opened her mouth to speak again, but fell silent at the obvious command in Stella’s voice, finally just nodding in defeat. She couldn’t upset Stella...and Stella was obviously very upset about all of this...so...she had to just deal. Just deal with it and move on…
“I’m scared, Stella…”
The words were hardly a whisper, and Kari curled her hands into fists as she said them. “I’m scared of you, and of him...I don’t think I can keep...keep seeing you like this...n-not right now anyway…”
She raised her head at the mention of a present, but half wondered if that present was just going to be the lieutenant’s hand ripping out her starseed this time. Kari hated feeling like this...especially where Stellerite was concerned. She...she loved this lieutenant, didn’t she? She didn’t want to be afraid of her...not when she had been so happy before...it wasn’t fair.
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Posted: Tue Feb 28, 2017 8:24 am
The blonde appreciated the way Kari quieted at the command, because it gave her hope that she could salvage the situation. "I know, baby," she replied, sniffling again as she edged carefully closer. "Epi's in big trouble, I promise. If I had known that would have happened, I wouldn't have let you two meet up without me."
The box crinkled in her hand as she thought about the way her brother had come running to her with his tail tucked between his legs.
"I don't - " her voice shook both from the anger she had to stomp down and, from what it would seem, the pain of the situation. "I don't want to lose you." When she blinked, tears would streak down her cheeks.
Stopping, Stellerite set the box on the ground and backed away. "That's for you, it's just a few treats, I wanted to share but...If you don't w-want t-to see m-me anymore - " she cut off, clearly crying at this point.
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Posted: Sat Mar 04, 2017 5:23 am
Kari swallowed, finally looking at Stella, unnerved to see her crying…it…she was too pretty to cry…especially over her…she was nothing special at all, not even a little bit special. “S-stella….I never said…I…”
Her hands trembled, they wanted to be around the lieutenant, they wanted to be holding her, caressing her…but Kari kept them firmly at her own sides.
“I never…never said that I didn’t want to see you anymore…I just said I needed some time, that’s all…I…”
She closed her eyes, trying to block everything out so she could draw in a breath…but it wasn’t working and she was managing only small gasps of air.
“I…I l-love you…so…I don’t…don’t see how you could think I wouldn’t want…” Her own tears had started now, hot against her skin. “W-wouldn’t want to ever see you again…” Because she did. She always wanted to see her…
Why couldn’t Stella just…just see that she was scared…
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Posted: Sat Mar 04, 2017 11:55 am
She was not looking at the other woman, she had her face hidden behind her hands as she sniffled and wiped at her face, but Stella knew that her ploys were working. The effect could be heard in the senshi's voice, the way she was quick to backpedal.
"I - I --" The blonde couldn't finish, choking on her words as she took a shaky breath, hands lowering to smooth out her pants. Her expression molded into the perfect picture of surprise at the admission, an audible gasp escaping her with both hands clutching the fabric of her shirt, above her heart.
"You love me?" Stellerite asked, blue eyes glossy from the tears and her lip caught between her teeth. "I didn't - I didn't know." Relief flooded her, making her feel infinitely better. If Kari loved her, then there was still a chance to keep everything together.
"I - " The words danced on her tongue, instincts telling her to say what she knew she would never mean, not the way Kari wanted her to mean it anyway. "I love you too," she whispered, sniflling and wiping at her nose. "Don't leave me sweetheart. I promise, what happened with Epi...it'll never happen to you again by his hand and I would never - I would never do that to you. You know that right?"
She looked like she was going to start crying again.
"Please, Kari, please let me kiss and hold you again - I've missed you."
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Posted: Mon Mar 06, 2017 11:04 am
Kari’s lip trembled and she had to close her eyes again, blocking Stella from her view. No, no she had to stay firm on this…firm and hard like a rock. A rock that was quickly crumbling. A rock slide.
A rock…
Who was she kidding?
There was no way she could stay firm about this…she was trembling already, her arms trying to betray her, trying to reach for Stella. She wanted the lieutenant in her arms…wanted to be in Stellas arms.
“I…I’ve missed you too but…Y-yes I love you…I…no…Stella, I don’t…” She couldn’t look at her, couldn’t look at the blonde at all…she didn’t want to…didn’t want to start kissing and get swept away in all of…all of the everything. Even if she really, really did want to.
“…I th-think we should maybe…just take things slow…So much has happened and…I just…I don’t know if I’m ready to just…jump back in…you…you know?”
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Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2017 9:01 am
Kari was telling her no and it was difficult for Stella to reign in the flare of temper that shot through her. "I - " her voice cracked and when she swallowed, she shook her head backing away from the senshi even as her hand remained outstretched for her.
"I don't understand." Her voice shook as she spoke. "You - you tell me you love me b-but I'm not allowed to touch you?" The blonde woman played it up like it didn't make any sense at all.
"Kari I - " A loud sniffle and Stellerite looking at her with hurt and confusion written across her face. "I don't know if I can do that. If I can't touch or kiss you..."
It's not going to work.
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Posted: Tue Mar 07, 2017 7:10 pm
Kari’s lip trembled. “I’m sorry…” The rest of her began trembling as well the longer she stood there. Finally she could look at the lieutenant no longer and just shook her head. “I’m so, so sorry…” She wasn’t even sure why she was apologizing…had she done something wrong…? She had made Stella cry…that was wrong but…
But…
Without another word, the brunette turned on her heel and fled, running just as fast as she could to get the heck away from there. Away from Stella’s tear stained face.
How could she have done that to her? To someone she loved but…
God, she was the worst type of person imaginable.
By the time she made it back to her apartment, Gale was a sobbing, inconsolable mess. She was such a damned fool. Such a damned, stupid fool.
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