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 Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2016 8:59 pm
The day seemed to pass in a blink of an eye. After an almost rocky start on their excursion, Michael and Caspian spent the day out on the water with the sun on their faces and the wind in their hair. Michael returned to being just as comfortable being out on the ocean as he’d been when they started.
When they weren’t talking about whatever came to mind, Michael was showing Caspian everything about sailboats he could think of. He did his best to teach him how to tie a few knots with some extra rope, and when to use each knot. He pointed out the various places that they sailed past, up the Chesapeake Bay. He showed Caspian everything that was hidden below deck; a whole kitchen, living room, bathroom, bedroom, and more storage than one might think possible. They sat in the sunlight and ate sandwiches and other finger foods Michael brought; cheese and fruit and crackers. And before they knew it, the sun was starting to set.
“Are you sure you’re okay? If we get back to the docks, we could at least find a hotel to stay in,” Michael frowned worriedly, feeling guilty that he completely lost track of the time. He knew Caspian said he told his sister not to wait up for him, but staying all night on a boat probably wasn’t what he had in mind.
By this point, Michael had at least already set the anchor close to the shore, but far enough away so that when the tide rolled out, that they would still be afloat. It wasn’t that they were impossibly far from the docks, but it would take almost an hour, and would probably end up being too dark to properly navigate the coastline.
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Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2016 9:23 pm
There was a lot to learn when it came to sailing, admittedly; but one of the best things about it all was the fact that he was able to do it in the first place. Caspian wasn’t sure he was any good at sailing a boat - maybe he’d leave that to Michael in the future - but it was still endlessly enjoyable to learn about it anyway. Not to mention that it was blatantly clear that this was Michael’s element; this was where he shone bright, and it was almost dazzling.
“I’m really okay,” Caspian promised him now, as they stood on deck. The sky above them was darkening to a deep, purpleish blue, and a light breeze had kicked up around them. “I don’t mind at all. Cassie knows not to expect me home until tomorrow, anyway.”
He turned around and grinned at Michael.
‘Besides,” said Caspian, giving an airy shrug of his shoulders. “This is much cooler than staying in a hotel. Just look up at that sky,” he added, pointing above their heads. “We can look at the stars when they start coming out, it’s already getting darker.”
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Posted: Sun Jul 03, 2016 9:46 pm
Michael watched Caspian, still a little wary since he was sure the other must be exhausted by this point. It took a lot of energy being out in the sun and wind all day, but Caspian seemed to be doing surprisingly well. Then again, Michael figured he should expect nothing less.
Sure enough, he looked up at the darkening sky above them when Caspian pointed. Sure enough, it was the color that seemed to be reflected in Caspian’s eyes, and Michael felt a strange twisting in his stomach again, his lungs not quite able to hold as much air as usual.
Conceding to the fact that Caspian seemed completely content with staying out on the sailboat, Michael finished with rolling up the sails, tying them into place so a strong gust of wind wouldn’t jostle the boat while they were trying to sleep.
Once the sails were tucked away, and everything was tidied up on deck, Michael disappeared for a few minutes inside the cabin, hoping that, during that short time, Caspian would not move around too much and accidentally fall off the side. When he came back up on the deck, he brought with him a couple thick blankets. Even though it was still warm out, the wind would cool everything substantially.
Michael made his way to the bow where there was enough room to lay down, and spread the blankets out, keeping one for warmth in case Caspian got cold.
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Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 7:10 pm
He was still there when Michael returned, Caspian staring up at the sky above with unabashed excitement. He was vaguely aware of him moving around, finishing off preparations and getting things ready to stay in for the night, and only when Michael had retrieved the blankets did Caspian look to see what he was doing.
“Oh,” he said, sounding pleased, and Caspian made his way over, wobbling a little. The boat did not make him sick - thank heavens he had avoided anything like that - but he still wasn’t used to actually being on board, and keeping his balance was a sort of art form in and of itself.
“This is awesome,” said Caspian with a sigh, and he sank down onto the blankets, kicking off his shoes in the process. He was still dressed in his long sleeves, only now he was in a pair of loose, light sweatpants instead of the shorts he’d had on earlier. He glanced up at Michael and grinned, patting the space next to him.
“Come sit down, you can start to see the stars, they’re beginning to pop out, look - “
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Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 7:34 pm
As the evening had progressed, Michael ended up pulling his shirt back on. He said it was to avoid getting too much sun, but really he felt self conscious under Caspian’s kind, concerned gaze. He was sure that Caspian knew he wasn’t being completely honest, which made him feel even more guilty about it, but hopefully with enough distraction he would be fine. He’d changed into sweatpants as well, if only because it would be much more comfortable than the shorts he’d been wearing.
Michael watched as Caspian made his way over to the blankets, ready to grab for Caspian should he lose his balance, but he ended up making it there okay, and sat down as was the intention.
“I’m glad you’re enjoying yourself,” he said with a small shake of his head as he stepped closer to make himself comfortable next to Caspian, sitting for a little while, before shifting enough to lay down, his arms lifting up to place his hands behind his head.
“You can already see Mars,” he said softly, lifting his hand to point to one of the only shining dots in the still darkening sky. It was just a little more red than another dot, which he pointed to next. “And that’s Jupiter.” He had no doubt which one Jupiter was.
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Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 7:44 pm
Caspian had drawn his legs up so that he could wrap his arms around them, knees bent against his chest. He felt, rather than saw, Michael make himself comfortable beside him; a reassuring presence that made him feel even better than he already did. It had been, even with the rockier moments from earlier, a wonderful day that had been filled with talk and laughter and playful banter and sailing and food and the smell of water and fresh air.
“I’m enjoying myself a lot,” Caspian corrected him, turning to look at Michael with a smile. “This has been a fantastic time, really.”
He shifted back slightly so that he could see where Michael was pointing, following the path of his finger as the stars began to blanket the inky, blue-black sky like little silvery white diamonds. The air was getting cooler; a gentle breeze had kicked up, and everything was quiet except for the gentle rocking of water against the boat and a few chirping hums from birds settling down.
“Of course you know which one’s Jupiter,” said Caspian with a laugh, and he prodded Michael’s shoulder playfully before wrapping his arms around his legs again. “But that’s really cool that you can see your planet from here.”
He was silent for a few minutes, just staring up at the sky with wordless awe.
“Is it...really so different from up there?” he asked, Caspian still looking up. “To see things from Jupiter, I mean. Can you see Earth from your Wonder?”
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Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 7:57 pm
Michael snorted softly when Caspian prodded his shoulder, very much enjoying that Caspian was enjoying himself. His laughter, pure and soft, seemed to settle the troubled thoughts that threatened to start surfacing again. As Caspian turned his gaze back up to the sky, Michael couldn’t help but smile softly at how in awe he was.
“Not really. Well, I haven’t really taken the time to try and look to see if I can see Earth. Jupiter is a pretty cloudy place, but sometimes when the clouds break, you can see some of Jupiter’s moons. I think there’s over sixty of them that have been discovered,” he said softly, not even realizing that his eyes were focused on Caspian’s profile as he stared up at the stars, rather than the sky itself.
There was something beautiful about the way that Caspian was completely mesmerized by the night sky, and the way the breeze brushed his dark hair around his face, the way his eyes lit up, and how his lips parted ever so slightly, probably not even realizing it.
He cleared his throat and forced himself to look away, glancing up at the darkening sky as well. “Every world is vastly different, of course. I’ve been to Mars as well, and there’s a place where the Zodiac converge called the Surrounding. Peter told me that his world is more like a jungle, at least the places where he’s been. So… you never know what you’ll find, but that’s part of the adventure, isn’t it?”
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Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 8:26 pm
He wondered if Earth was visible from wherever his home planet was, though Caspian doubted it. The galaxy was big enough as it was; he had no idea where Remus lay within the spectrum of things, and whether or not it was somewhere as beautiful as another place might have been. He still wanted to see Jupiter more than he wanted to see his own place, but Michael didn’t need to know that.
He glanced down at him now, at the shadowy profile of his face. There were lights on the boat but they were dim and set the mood for a much more relaxed, comfortable feel rather than bright and blaring. Caspian could make out Michael’s face easily, the line of his jaw and the shadows cast by his movements.
“That’s...I never knew there were so many different versions of homeworlds,” he said, glancing back up at the sky. “I mean, I suppose it’s kind of obvious, all things considered, but…”
Caspian’s eyes crinkled around the corners as he smiled. “It’s pretty cool.”
He traced a few of the constellations, forming lines in his head.
“What if mine is boring?” he asked, after a moment, and though his tone was intended to be light, there was an undercurrent of anxiousness to it. “What if it’s just like...a rock?”
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Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 9:00 pm
Michael let out a small, sympathetic laugh when Caspian continued to worry about what his homeworld would be like, removing one of his hands from behind his head so he could reach down and gently tap the side of Caspian’s thigh with the back of his hand, as if hoping the physical contact, as brief as it was, would jostle him out of his negative thoughts.
“Somehow I doubt that your world is just a rock. You wouldn’t expect it, but these people were very advanced, I think. It might not seem that way since they had technology different to our own, but… I know Sessrumnir specialized in maps and things to help navigate the cosmos. Not just the flat maps you might imagine, but there are these little orbs of stars and planets that seem to be suspended in some kind of… gaseous state…” he tried to explain, knowing it would be difficult without actually showing what he was talking about.
“If your world is boring, then I’m sure you’ll find a way to make it not boring,” he suspected, bouncing his hand lightly against Caspian’s thigh again, more absentmindedly than for any particular reason. “I’ll help you bring stuff there to make it however you want. I’m pretty good with a hammer, you know. You could turn it into your own personal skate park. Bring some spray paint and you can tag it to your heart’s content,” he suggested with another small laugh. “You can help design it, and I’ll build it. It’ll be fine. I promise.”
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Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 9:16 pm
He felt the tap of Michael’s hand against his leg and turned to look at him, the laugh making his stomach flutter a little. It was not often that Michael was in such a good mood; Caspian found he wanted to keep hearing it, keep seeing it, keep being around him when he was in one of these moods. Truth be told, he didn’t mind being around Michael even when he was his usual scowly, serious self - but there was something unbelievably nice about getting to see him smile.
And something even nicer about knowing he was one of the only people who got to see this side of Michael Gallo.
“Maps,” said Caspian, and he was fighting a smile now as he shifted, turning so that he was sitting sideways facing him. “So...treasure maps? What you’re telling me is that you really are a pirate?”
His voice was light and teasing, Caspian clearly fighting a smile. He made no attempt at stopping Michael’s hand, the gentle contact soothing. Visiting his homeworld was an intimidating prospect; that hadn’t changed, but maybe visiting wouldn’t be so bad if Michael was there too.
Michael, offering to help him, because he knew how much it was something that Caspian struggled with.
Caspian bit his lip, his chest feeling tight as he looked down at him, and the words were stuck in his throat, swallowed back, replaced with a gentle smile.
“It’s nice, you know,” he said softly. “Feeling like there’s someone who’s got my back. It’s nice.”
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Posted: Tue Jul 05, 2016 9:42 pm
“You’re killing me with the pirate talk,” Michael groaned, but he was still grinning as he did so. “But who knows, they might be treasure maps. You’re just out to make me a pirate, aren’t you?” he let out an exasperated breath and shook his head.
Michael raised a brow at Caspian’s comment about feeling someone has his back, confused by the way he said it. “What are you talking about?” he asked, his voice still light as he ended up just resting the back of his hand against Caspian’s thigh. “Of course I have your back. Don’t you be giving up on me so quickly, Cas…”
There was something about those soft, gentle smiles of Caspian’s that felt… incredibly lonely. It made something inside Michael’s chest ache, as if he was clearly not doing enough to prevent Caspian from feeling that way.
After a couple moments, he pulled his hand away, and shifted to sit up on his elbows, frowning at Caspian in the dim light of the moon and stars. All those times before, those small smiles just seemed friendly, but the more he got to know Caspian, the less happy those smiles really seemed. Even though he was sure Caspian was trying to make it seem as though he was.
“I’ll do whatever you need me to, okay?”
It felt strange promising something like that to… anyone… Just a few weeks ago, if he was told he would be sitting on his boat with Caspian and they would be talking about things like they were… he would have probably told them to find something better to do with their time. But now…
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Posted: Wed Jul 06, 2016 9:16 am
”Don’t hate on pirates,” Caspian said dramatically. “Pirates are badasses, okay.”
He couldn’t help but grin at Michael, his smile infectious, but it faded a moment later. Caspian felt the light weight of Michael’s hand against his leg and tried to concentrate on that instead of the black memories that threatened to rise up and overtake all of the good ones he was trying to make. Mocking faces and taunting laughter were on the edges of his thoughts, a consistent reminder, but he pushed them back, tried to suppress them with confidence and bravado as he always did.
“I’m not,” he said quickly, and shook his head. “I’m not giving up on you that quickly, promise.”
He wanted to see more of those dazzling, rare smiles. Caspian caught the quiet, firm promise in Michael’s voice and knew it was not something that was made lightly, something in his chest catching, his breath stuttering slightly.
You can’t possibly know how much I want - need that to be true.
He had said that he needed Michael simply because of the mentoring thing - but that wasn’t true, not entirely. Yes, it was beneficial and helpful to have someone who would guide him in all things powered - but it was more than that. More than what he had ever thought would stem from a chance meeting, a random occurrence that had been something so seemingly insignificant at the time.
Unfolding his legs and loosening his arms, Caspian eased himself down onto his stomach beside Michael, folding his arms beneath his head and resting it on them. He looked sideways, his smile still soft, still slightly sad around the edges, though he wasn’t as aware of it as Michael was.
“You keep me stable, I think,” he said. “So just...keep doing whatever it is you’re doing.”
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Posted: Wed Jul 06, 2016 11:02 am
Michael frowned sadly at Caspian and the shift in the sound of his voice. He was no longer smiling. By now, with all the early morning phone calls and getting to know him a little more each day, Michael was pretty sure he could tell when Caspian wasn’t smiling, even though he didn’t claim to know everything about him. Not even close.
There was something there that seemed just as closed off as Michael was about things. But what, he wasn’t sure.
“I keep you stable?” he wondered, completely bewildered by the comment. Him? The one who kept fluctuating on what he wanted to do with whatever friendship they had? Wasn’t he trying to push Caspian away not too long ago? And now he was making promises to help build skate ramps on his potentially boring world?
Michael stared at Caspian for a few more moments, before twisting onto his side, propping his head up so he could look at Caspian as he rested on his stomach beside him. There were things he wanted to ask… things he wanted to know more about… but it wasn’t that easy, he knew. Michael knew very well that if Caspian didn’t want to talk about something, then he wouldn’t.
“I don’t know what I’m doing…” he admitted, almost a little sheepishly, some shame in his voice as well. “But I’ll try to keep doing… whatever it is… if that’s what you need,” he promised.
He paused for a few moments, before very tentatively saying, “You know I would listen… if you ever wanted to talk about things…”
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Posted: Wed Jul 06, 2016 11:13 am
He couldn’t help but laugh at the bewildered tone of Michael’s voice, and the laughter was genuine, Caspian turning his head to bury his face in his arms. He shifted back a few seconds later, looking helplessly amused.
“Yes,” he said, “You do. You, with your scowls and your pirate objection and your love of sailing and your gray shirts and your Tolkien fanboying and your level head. You keep me sane.”
And he needed it, more than he had ever thought he would, more than he ever thought was possible. Caspian felt Michael shift down beside him, on his side to face him, and it felt warm and close like this, as though they were the only two people that existed in this little corner of the world. The sky above was black and spotted with stars, more open than it could be seen in the city, no buildings or streetlamps to obscure or block the sheer magnitude and beauty of a velvety night sky.
Caspian felt as though breathing was difficult. He looked over at Michael, with his tentative offer of safety and reassurance, and bit his lip, the flush of pink across his cheeks one of shame. He lowered his eyes, unable to fully meet his gaze.
The words would not come. Not all of them, at least.
“I know,” he said quietly, so quietly it was barely audible. Caspian hesitated, then stretched out a hand and very loosely, tentatively, curled his fingers in the front of Michael’s shirt, holding on without restricting. “I know you would.”
He closed his eyes briefly, then opened them again, staring without really seeing, his gaze slightly unfocused somewhere in the direction of Michael’s sternum.
“I know you said you don’t...really have friends,” Caspian said after a long moment. “But neither do I. did I. Not really. I - thought I did, but I...was mistaken.”
His fingers tightened ever so slightly on Michael’s shirt, and he still wasn’t looking at him. “I talk to a lot of people, but I don’t...really have anyone, not really. I never have. It was all just…”
His voice tailed off.
All just an illusion.
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Posted: Wed Jul 06, 2016 12:06 pm
“I like to think I’m very subtle with my fanboying,” Michael mumbled, but he was sure it sounded more like he was pouting. It wasn’t as though he went around advertising that he was a nerd. But beyond the pouting frown, he couldn’t help but stare in amazement when Caspian said that he kept him sane. That wasn’t something he really expected to hear, especially with everything that had already happened.
But then Caspian quietly began to explain himself, words soft and sad, mixed with something else that Michael wasn’t quite sure of. Betrayal? Hopelessness? Definitely loneliness.
Michael frowned, letting Caspian grip onto his shirt until he was done speaking, and then he reached down to gingerly unlatch the fingers from his shirt. He then shifted just enough so he could slide his arm underneath Caspian’s arm, his hand sliding up his arm and wrist until he took hold of his hand, pulling the back of Caspian’s hand against his chest to hold.
Caspian often took hold of his wrist to comfort him, so he wanted to do the same, or at least something similar. He didn’t like hearing the sad tone in Caspian’s voice.
“I have a friend now,” Michael admitted, moving his other arm so he was no longer propped up on his elbow, but folding it under and behind his head so he could be more on Caspian’s level, his other hand still holding tightly to Caspian’s hand.
“That’s all that matters. The past is in the past,” he said softly, knowing he needed to follow that rule as well. “And he’d a good friend, too. A little too trusting and stubborn, but good.”
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